Voicemail

A poor relationship with your parents can make a world of difference This episode is not explicit. Written, Performed & Edited by Harlan Guthrie Harlan Guthrie is a creative, nerdy dynamo. Give him a meal, he wants to know how it was made. What temperature was the oven, he’ll say. Was that tossed with olive oil? Sit in the car with him and listen to him sing harmonies with the radio. Give him an hour alone and he’ll come find you because he wrote a spooky story. He’ll read it in a creepy voice. Wait too long in the line at the grocery store and he’ll turn to you with a riddle, or beg to be told one. www.diceshamepodcast.com TRANSCRIPT You have 1 new message Hey dad, it’s Erik. Sigh. I wanted to call and tell you some big news… I should be honest and say that I kept delaying it… I didn’t know how you’d react. Obviously, I regret that now but… I guess I just wanted to say that I love you and I… I’m sorry about being so distant these past few years, I wish things were different – it’s easy to blame you but… it’s my fault as well and… well… Taylor’s pregnant. Sigh. Anyway, that’s what I would’ve told you had I not been so damned bullheaded. Sniff. And now… it’s been an entire week since you died… and I have to come to terms with the fact that you are never coming back.

Fiction
Published: July 27, 2020, 2 a.m.

Horrorscope: Leo

Your daily horrorscope. It's not looking good for you, Leo. This episode is not explicit. Written by Shannon Perry of Oz 9 and performed by David S. Dear of A Ninth World Journal. Shannon Perry is the creator and complete disaster behind Oz 9. https://oz-9.com/ https://ninthworldjournal.com/ TRANSCRIPT Horrorscope: Leo, just a week ago, you made the very bad mistake of exchanging an unfriendly glance with an angry woman in a red coat. She etched your name in acid on her cellar floor. And a date. Spiders do her bidding, so if you hear the sound of a thousand feet, scuttling up the stairs to your bedroom, creeping across your walls, if your blankets move when you are still, run. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written by Shannon Perry of Oz 9 and performed by David S. Dear of A Ninth World Journal. Music: When Bats Fly by Neil Cross, Storyblocks

Fiction
Published: July 27, 2020, 1:55 a.m.

Earworm

Sometimes something just gets into your head and you can't quite get it out. This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Elizabeth Wilcox. Elizabeth is a writer, avid role-player, amateur mixologist, member of and social media manager for The Dimension Door Podcast. You can also find her on Instagram (@wilcoxwriter) and at her website, briarbooklane.com Podchaser.com/thedimensiondoorpodcast https://www.podchaser.com/creators/elizabeth-wilcox-107a9C6gJ3 dimensiondoorpodcast.com TRANSCRIPT It began when I awoke to the unpleasant sensation of a prickling within my right ear. It felt as though something was scritch-scratching away upon my eardrum like a pen upon paper. I tried to clear it, but the sensation would not cease. The longer it continued, the more I was certain that some living thing was burrowing into me, scritch-scratching away at my flesh and my sanity. The doctor who checked said my inner ear is inflamed, but clear. No foreign object, no thing, is there. I should be reassured. The prickling has subsided to no more than an occasional flicker of a whisper. I twitch now and then. The dreams, though. What do I do about the dreams? The damp earth between my sheets? The soil between my teeth? Sorry, what was I saying? Oh, I remember now. Yes. I was just asking: Would you like to see my garden?

Fiction
Published: July 27, 2020, 1:50 a.m.

Proposal

A romantic night in the woods turns deadly. This episode contains potential triggers or upsetting content and is prefaced with a content warning. CW: Violence and Gore Tommy was played by Najee "Kamijace" Walker Jessica was played by Marnie Warner Written and produced by Derek Graziano from Rolling Misadventures https://www.rollingmisadventures.com TRANSCRIPT This episode contains violence and gore. Listener discretion is advised. [Footsteps running on gravel, wooded background noise. Panting] [Both people are winded and scared, catching their breath between lines] Tommy: I think we lost him..we....it….I don't even know what to call them. Jessica: (slightly annoyed) I don't care what it's called. Why did I let you talk me into coming here? Tommy: I….I...I thought a romantic getaway would fit the bill. Jessica: What? Wait….no…no no no...don't do this now. Oh, get up. Tommy: I need to ask this, just in case we don't make it. I don't….I don’t want to die here without knowing. Jessica, will you marry me? Jessica: (loving, but still scared) Oh Tommy….I…..I……. [Knife unsheath. Stabbing Sound] Tommy screams. Tommy was played by Najee ""Kamijace"" Walker Jessica was played by Marnie Warner Written and Produced by Derek Graziano from Rolling Misadventures. Check out his show at rollingmisadventures.com Sound effects were used under Creative Commons 0 from freesound.org"

Fiction
Published: July 27, 2020, 1:45 a.m.

Horrorscope: Cancer

Things aren't looking great for you this week, Cancer. Best get your affairs in order. This episode is not explicit. Written by Shannon Perry, performed by Bonnie Brantley of Oz 9. Shannon Perry is the creator and complete disaster behind Oz 9. https://oz-9.com/ TRANSCRIPT Horrorscope: Cancer, for the next week, if you find you need to use the bathroom in the middle of the night...don’t. Hold it or get a bedpan. You don’t know this, but when you turned away from your bathroom mirror last night, your reflection reached out its arms to you in the dark. Whether to caress you or pull you through to the nightmare side, I don’t know, but I wouldn’t take the chance. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written by Shannon Perry and performed by Bonnie Brantley, both of Oz 9. Music: When Bats Fly by Neil Cross, Storyblocks

Fiction
Published: July 27, 2020, 1:40 a.m.

Shadow People

Things you don't dare think about This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Arthur Gnarl. TRANSCRIPT You know the "shadow people" in the corner of your eye It's your brain protecting you from the real things Time travellers created 2020 as we know it in order to prevent something worse in 2021. They failed. “No dessert until you eat your greens” said mother as I forced myself to take another bite. I always liked the Greens, but I suppose mother was right, they were dreadful neighbours. Music is Shadowlands 1 - Horizon Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Fiction
Published: July 27, 2020, 1:35 a.m.

Practice Makes

Practice Makes perfect, no matter the situation. This episode contains potential triggers or upsetting content and is prefaced with a content warning. Implied Violence Written, Performed & Edited by Harlan Guthrie Harlan Guthrie is a creative, nerdy dynamo. Give him a meal, he wants to know how it was made. What temperature was the oven, he’ll say. Was that tossed with olive oil? Sit in the car with him and listen to him sing harmonies with the radio. Give him an hour alone and he’ll come find you because he wrote a spooky story. He’ll read it in a creepy voice. Wait too long in the line at the grocery store and he’ll turn to you with a riddle, or beg to be told one. www.diceshamepodcast.com TRANSCRIPT "Hey David"

Fiction
Published: July 27, 2020, 1:30 a.m.

MADONNA SPECTACLE 11: THE POWER OF GOODBYE

The power of goodbye. This episode is not explicit. Written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager. MADONNA SPECTACLE - Kiba Walker MINDY - Ditrie Marie Bowie MADDY, OLD - David S. Dear FELIPE - Matheus Carneiro Produced by Karin Heimdahl Script consultants Leeanne Stoddart and Remi J. Hovda. Original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez. Sound effects either created by Karin or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Øystein Ulsberg Brager is a freelance theatre director and playwright. He is joint artistic director of Imploding Fictions, and co-creator of the award winning audio fiction podcast The Amelia Project. He currently works as a dramaturg at the Norwegian regional theatre Unge Viken Teater where he also runs a young writers program. Kiba Walker is an American actor, musician, director, writer, and performer based out of Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas. Kiba currently has one album out, titled "XO", that released in May 2016. He runs a music channel called "KibaKovers", adapting anime and video game openings into English for a broader audience, as well as regular Top 40 covers. He is also one of the champions of the hit Fort Worth Drag Competition, The 3, as Salem Moon! Ditrie Marie Bowie is a performer and creator based in Vancouver, BC. You can find more of their work at their website. Matheus Carneiro makes the Controller Disconnected podcast. David S. Dear is the producer of A Ninth World Journal. Links: Øystein Ulsberg Brager oysteinbrager.com Kiba Walker https://www.kibawalkervoices.com/ Ditrie Marie Bowie https://ditriemariebowie.com Matheus Carneiro https://condisconnected.com David S Dear https://ninthworldjournal.com/ Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com Leeanne Stoddart https://www.instagram.com/leeanne_m_s/ Remi J. Hovda https://www.instagram.com/nabiyeongeisha/ Anthony Luis Sanchez https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8mqJY4bOeb4IP285vKj4OA https://www.anthonyluissanchez.com/ TRANSCRIPT MADONNA SPECTACLE, NOW OLD Do you recognize my voice? I don’t blame you if you don’t. It’s me: Madonna Spectacle. I’ve had a long life. Some parts have been really hard. MINDY, IN THE PAST A wheelchair isn’t the end of the world! Listen, I’m gonna sew you a costume which comes off when you spin the wheelchair around, like one spin and your whole outfit is different! It’s gonna be magic! MADONNA SPECTACLE, NOW OLD Some parts have been very easy. FELIPE My folks threw me out. I don’t have anywhere to go. Maybe I can... live with you for a while? MADONNA SPECTACLE, IN THE PAST Of course you can. MINDY, IN THE SAME PAST For as long as you want. MADONNA SPECTACLE, IN THE PAST If you want us to, we can be your parents. MADONNA SPECTACLE, NOW OLD But all has to come to an end. I’ve seen my kids fly off, to make new and better lives for themselves. And now, it’s my turn. Madonna Spectacle’s final performance. Tearing off layer after layer of fantastic dresses, and when the final one comes off... there’s no one there. Just emptiness. And then the lights go out. THE END Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was performed by Kiba Walker as Madonna Spectacle, Ditrie Marie Bowie as Mindy, Matheus Carneiro as Felipe and David S Dear as Madonna Spectacle, old. It was written by Øystein Brager and produced by Karin Heimdahl with original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez.

Fiction
Published: July 19, 2020, 6:50 p.m.

MADONNA SPECTACLE 10: BROOMCLOSETED

Broomcloseted. This episode is not explicit. Written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager. MADONNA SPECTACLE - Kiba Walker MINDY - Ditrie Marie Bowie Produced by Karin Heimdahl Script consultants Leeanne Stoddart and Remi J. Hovda. Original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez. Sound effects either created by Karin or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Øystein Ulsberg Brager is a freelance theatre director and playwright. He is joint artistic director of Imploding Fictions, and co-creator of the award winning audio fiction podcast The Amelia Project. He currently works as a dramaturg at the Norwegian regional theatre Unge Viken Teater where he also runs a young writers program. Kiba Walker is an American actor, musician, director, writer, and performer based out of Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas. Kiba currently has one album out, titled "XO", that released in May 2016. He runs a music channel called "KibaKovers", adapting anime and video game openings into English for a broader audience, as well as regular Top 40 covers. He is also one of the champions of the hit Fort Worth Drag Competition, The 3, as Salem Moon! Ditrie Marie Bowie is a performer and creator based in Vancouver, BC. You can find more of their work at their website. Links: Øystein Ulsberg Brager oysteinbrager.com Kiba Walker https://www.kibawalkervoices.com/ Ditrie Marie Bowie https://ditriemariebowie.com Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com Leeanne Stoddart https://www.instagram.com/leeanne_m_s/ Remi J. Hovda https://www.instagram.com/nabiyeongeisha/ Anthony Luis Sanchez https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8mqJY4bOeb4IP285vKj4OA https://www.anthonyluissanchez.com/ TRANSCRIPT MADONNA SPECTACLE Mindy wants me to meet her parents, but she doesn’t want them to know I’m her boyfriend, she wants to find out if they like me first – oh yeah, Mindy and I are a couple! So we go to Massachusetts and I turn up first pretending to be her friend Charlie from Austin. Which is a really stupid idea, because I can’t do an Austin accent to save my life. MINDY, ARRIVING AT HER FOLKS Is he already here? What do you think about him? MADONNA SPECTACLE Meanwhile, her mom has been so convinced by my straight-dude charms, combined with a glass or two too much, she’s decided to come on to me by locking the both of us in a broom closet. MINDY, ARRIVING AT HER FOLKS Dad – where’s mom and Maddy – I mean, Charlie? MADONNA SPECTACLE I escape in the nick of time, Mindy’s dad catches her calling me “Maddy”, and the cat’s finally out of the bag. Mindy’s mom is ticked off, but we put her to bed. Mindy’s dad really likes me. That night, in the bedroom, Madonna Spectacle does a private rendition of “Crazy For You”, only for Mindy, the most special person in my whole entire life. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was performed by Kiba Walker as Madonna Spectacle and Ditrie Marie Bowie as Mindy. It was written by Øystein Brager and produced by Karin Heimdahl with original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez.

Fiction
Published: July 19, 2020, 6:45 p.m.

MADONNA SPECTACLE 9: WAITING FOR YOU

Waiting for you. This episode is not explicit. Written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager. MADONNA SPECTACLE - Kiba Walker DOLLY - Angélique Lazarus Produced by Karin Heimdahl Script consultants Leeanne Stoddart and Remi J. Hovda. Original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez. Sound effects either created by Karin or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Øystein Ulsberg Brager is a freelance theatre director and playwright. He is joint artistic director of Imploding Fictions, and co-creator of the award winning audio fiction podcast The Amelia Project. He currently works as a dramaturg at the Norwegian regional theatre Unge Viken Teater where he also runs a young writers program. Kiba Walker is an American actor, musician, director, writer, and performer based out of Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas. Kiba currently has one album out, titled "XO", that released in May 2016. He runs a music channel called "KibaKovers", adapting anime and video game openings into English for a broader audience, as well as regular Top 40 covers. He is also one of the champions of the hit Fort Worth Drag Competition, The 3, as Salem Moon! An experienced educator, singer, and veteran of voice over, Angelique lends her voice and talent as Dolly in Madonna Spectacle. She started her voice acting career in 2016 with Ryan Estrada's "Big Data" in South Korea. Since then, Angelique has been in several audio drama productions as well as animations and content creation projects. Someone told her once she could play Ursula's bastard daughter and she's kind of into it. Links: Øystein Ulsberg Brager oysteinbrager.com Kiba Walker https://www.kibawalkervoices.com/ Angelique Lazarus http://www.angeliquevoices.com Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com Leeanne Stoddart https://www.instagram.com/leeanne_m_s/ Remi J. Hovda https://www.instagram.com/nabiyeongeisha/ Anthony Luis Sanchez https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8mqJY4bOeb4IP285vKj4OA https://www.anthonyluissanchez.com/ TRANSCRIPT MADONNA SPECTACLE Dolly is dying. I go home. Sit by her bed. I don’t want to, but I do it. DOLLY, DYING You were always my special one. MADONNA SPECTACLE She’s buttering me up. DOLLY, DYING In my eyes, you could do no wrong. MADONNA SPECTACLE She’s not very good at it. I remember how it was, how I disgusted her. DOLLY, DYING I’ve been so proud of you honey, everything you’ve achieved, with that fag-thing. MADONNA SPECTACLE She means “drag-thing”. But her mistake speaks volumes. DOLLY, DYING I always knew you’d make it big! MADONNA SPECTACLE She wants me to forgive her. She wants to die knowing she was a good mom. She wasn’t. DOLLY, DYING I love you, honey. MADONNA SPECTACLE Should I fulfill the wish of a dying woman? Or let the old hag rot in her own bad conscience? DOLLY, DYING Don’t you love me too? MADONNA SPECTACLE, BEING THE ONLY PERSON SHE CAN BE I love you too, mom. I always did. MADONNA SPECTACLE Dolly dies. I go home. I feel lighter. I make a new set. “Justify My Love”. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was performed by Kiba Walker as Madonna Spectacle and Angelique Lazarus as Dolly. It was written by Øystein Brager and produced by Karin Heimdahl with original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez.

Fiction
Published: July 19, 2020, 6:40 p.m.

MADONNA SPECTACLE 8: WE NEED A HOLIDAY

We need a holiday. This episode is not explicit. Written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager. MADONNA SPECTACLE - Kiba Walker MINDY - Ditrie Marie Bowie Produced by Karin Heimdahl Script consultants Leeanne Stoddart and Remi J. Hovda. Original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez. Sound effects either created by Karin or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Øystein Ulsberg Brager is a freelance theatre director and playwright. He is joint artistic director of Imploding Fictions, and co-creator of the award winning audio fiction podcast The Amelia Project. He currently works as a dramaturg at the Norwegian regional theatre Unge Viken Teater where he also runs a young writers program. Kiba Walker is an American actor, musician, director, writer, and performer based out of Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas. Kiba currently has one album out, titled ""XO"", that released in May 2016. He runs a music channel called ""KibaKovers"", adapting anime and video game openings into English for a broader audience, as well as regular Top 40 covers. He is also one of the champions of the hit Fort Worth Drag Competition, The 3, as Salem Moon! Ditrie Marie Bowie is a performer and creator based in Vancouver, BC. You can find more of their work at their website. Links: Øystein Ulsberg Brager oysteinbrager.com Kiba Walker https://www.kibawalkervoices.com/ Ditrie Marie Bowie https://ditriemariebowie.com Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com Leeanne Stoddart https://www.instagram.com/leeanne_m_s/ Remi J. Hovda https://www.instagram.com/nabiyeongeisha/ Anthony Luis Sanchez https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8mqJY4bOeb4IP285vKj4OA https://www.anthonyluissanchez.com/ TRANSCRIPT MADONNA SPECTACLE I can do it. I’m going on stage. Madonna Spectacle is in demand, and I am going to deliver. I can’t do it. Halfway through my set, I have to quit. It’s the most humiliating thing I’ve ever experienced. MINDY Maddy, you’ve got to look after yourself. MADONNA SPECTACLE I don’t want to look after myself. I never learned how anyway. I want to live. MINDY You’re overbooking. Learn to master this thing. MADONNA I tell everyone I’m taking a sabbatical. They think I’m going to drug rehab. It’s not drugs. It’s my own body. I have to relearn how I work. Four months later, I’m ready to tell people. Madonna Spectacle is back. She has a neurological illness. And she’s decided to own it. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was performed by Kiba Walker as Madonna Spectacle and Ditrie Marie Bowie as Mindy. It was written by Øystein Brager and produced by Karin Heimdahl with original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez.

Fiction
Published: July 19, 2020, 6:35 p.m.

MADONNA SPECTACLE 7: MYSTERY SUCKS

Mystery sucks. This episode is not explicit. Written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager. MADONNA SPECTACLE - Kiba Walker MINDY - Ditrie Marie Bowie NEUROLOGIST - Emma Laslett    Produced by Karin Heimdahl Script consultants Leeanne Stoddart and Remi J. Hovda. Original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez. Sound effects either created by Karin or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Øystein Ulsberg Brager is a freelance theatre director and playwright. He is joint artistic director of Imploding Fictions, and co-creator of the award winning audio fiction podcast The Amelia Project. He currently works as a dramaturg at the Norwegian regional theatre Unge Viken Teater where he also runs a young writers program. Kiba Walker is an American actor, musician, director, writer, and performer based out of Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas. Kiba currently has one album out, titled "XO", that released in May 2016. He runs a music channel called ""KibaKovers"", adapting anime and video game openings into English for a broader audience, as well as regular Top 40 covers. He is also one of the champions of the hit Fort Worth Drag Competition, The 3, as Salem Moon! Ditrie Marie Bowie is a performer and creator based in Vancouver, BC. You can find more of their work at their website. Emma Laslett is a non-binary trans woman (she/they) disability activist, quiz enthusiast, and voice actress from the UK, no matter what the accent might indicate. Links: Øystein Ulsberg Brager oysteinbrager.com Kiba Walker https://www.kibawalkervoices.com/ Ditrie Marie Bowie https://ditriemariebowie.com Emma Laslett http://twitter.com/Waruce Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com Leeanne Stoddart https://www.instagram.com/leeanne_m_s/ Remi J. Hovda https://www.instagram.com/nabiyeongeisha/ Anthony Luis Sanchez https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8mqJY4bOeb4IP285vKj4OA https://www.anthonyluissanchez.com/ TRANSCRIPT MADONNA SPECTACLE One day, as I’m performing my new set, “Beautiful Stranger”, I lose my balance and fall into the auditorium. I make it a joke, but the guy whose glasses I broke doesn’t think it’s funny. Mindy is worried. MINDY You should go see a doctor. MADONNA SPECTACLE My doctor doesn’t know what it is. I don’t like mysteries. He sends me to a neurologist. She knocks on my knee with a hammer, orders a spinal tap and gives me an MRI. NEUROLOGIST While we wait for the results to come back, why don’t you tell me about this stage persona of yours? MADONNA SPECTACLE, TO THE NEUROLOGIST Madonna Spectacle. She doesn’t listen to anyone. It’s like I don’t even control her. She’s got her own mind. NEUROLOGIST Hm. She certainly does. The results are back. Please sit. MADONNA SPECTACLE I stand. She tells me what it is. I am Madonna Spectacle. She is me. Yet, I’m starting to hate her. I want my life back. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was performed by Kiba Walker as Madonna Spectacle, Ditrie Marie Bowie as Mindy and Emma Laslett as the Neurologist. It was written by Øystein Brager and produced by Karin Heimdahl with original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez.

Fiction
Published: July 19, 2020, 6:30 p.m.

MADONNA SPECTACLE 6: REBORN AGAIN

Reborn again. This episode is not explicit. Written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager. MADONNA SPECTACLE - Kiba Walker MINDY - Ditrie Marie Bowie Produced by Karin Heimdahl Script consultants Leeanne Stoddart and Remi J. Hovda. Original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez. Sound effects either created by Karin or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Øystein Ulsberg Brager is a freelance theatre director and playwright. He is joint artistic director of Imploding Fictions, and co-creator of the award winning audio fiction podcast The Amelia Project. He currently works as a dramaturg at the Norwegian regional theatre Unge Viken Teater where he also runs a young writers program. Kiba Walker is an American actor, musician, director, writer, and performer based out of Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas. Kiba currently has one album out, titled "XO", that released in May 2016. He runs a music channel called "KibaKovers", adapting anime and video game openings into English for a broader audience, as well as regular Top 40 covers. He is also one of the champions of the hit Fort Worth Drag Competition, The 3, as Salem Moon! Ditrie Marie Bowie is a performer and creator based in Vancouver, BC. You can find more of their work at their website.    Links: Øystein Ulsberg Brager oysteinbrager.com Kiba Walker https://www.kibawalkervoices.com/ Ditrie Marie Bowie https://ditriemariebowie.com Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com Leeanne Stoddart https://www.instagram.com/leeanne_m_s/ Remi J. Hovda https://www.instagram.com/nabiyeongeisha/ Anthony Luis Sanchez https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8mqJY4bOeb4IP285vKj4OA https://www.anthonyluissanchez.com/ TRANSCRIPT MADONNA SPECTACLE I keep winning drag contests. I headline bigger and bigger drag shows. Madonna Spectacle is invincible. My competitors? I read them! All in good fun. I badmouth them to event coordinators. Make up lies, say that they steal from the cash register. I get their spots. All part of the game. I earn money. I can live off being a drag queen. This is what it was all for. But I have this feeling... Mindy calls. She doesn’t want to hang anymore. MINDY, ON THE PHONE I don’t know you! You’re cruel and heartless. Who are you? MADONNA SPECTACLE I call up everyone I’ve hurt and apologize. I decide I want to be a ray of light. I talk to my favorite drag club and work with them to set up a mentoring scheme for young drag artists. Mindy calls. MINDY, ON THE PHONE Uhm... What you’re doing is really cool. Would you wanna... hang?   Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was performed by Kiba Walker as Madonna Spectacle and Ditrie Marie Bowie as Mindy. It was written by Øystein Brager and produced by Karin Heimdahl with original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez.

Fiction
Published: July 12, 2020, 6:55 p.m.

MADONNA SPECTACLE 5: BON VOYAGE AND WELCOME BACK

Bon voyage and welcome back. This episode is not explicit. Written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager. MADONNA SPECTACLE - Kiba Walker MINDY - Ditrie Marie Bowie Produced by Karin Heimdahl Script consultants Leeanne Stoddart and Remi J. Hovda. Original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez. Sound effects either created by Karin or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Øystein Ulsberg Brager is a freelance theatre director and playwright. He is joint artistic director of Imploding Fictions, and co-creator of the award winning audio fiction podcast The Amelia Project. He currently works as a dramaturg at the Norwegian regional theatre Unge Viken Teater where he also runs a young writers program. Kiba Walker is an American actor, musician, director, writer, and performer based out of Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas. Kiba currently has one album out, titled "XO", that released in May 2016. He runs a music channel called "KibaKovers", adapting anime and video game openings into English for a broader audience, as well as regular Top 40 covers. He is also one of the champions of the hit Fort Worth Drag Competition, The 3, as Salem Moon! Ditrie Marie Bowie is a performer and creator based in Vancouver, BC. You can find more of their work at their website.    Links: Øystein Ulsberg Brager oysteinbrager.com Kiba Walker https://www.kibawalkervoices.com/ Ditrie Marie Bowie https://ditriemariebowie.com Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com Leeanne Stoddart https://www.instagram.com/leeanne_m_s/ Remi J. Hovda https://www.instagram.com/nabiyeongeisha/ Anthony Luis Sanchez https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8mqJY4bOeb4IP285vKj4OA https://www.anthonyluissanchez.com/ TRANSCRIPT MINDY, ON THE PHONE Maddy? It’s Mindy! I just wanted to say: Go girl! You win that tri-state pageant! Also, you’re my favorite person in the whole, wide world. CLICK. MINDY, ON THE PHONE, A FEW DAYS LATER OH MY GOD! I saw you online! That was... Guuuuurl! Also, how were the parties? Did you meet anyone? I’m so jealous! Oh my god you’re not just a Queen, you’re a star! MADONNA SPECTACLE Know what? When I fell over and my butt showed and everyone laughed and I won anyway, I had an epiphany. I’m gonna be a comedy Queen. I’ve always been scared of not being able to make people laugh, but it’s really not that hard. Just fall over and show your butt. I've had the taste for danger. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was performed by Kiba Walker as Madonna Spectacle and Ditrie Marie Bowie as Mindy. It was written by Øystein Brager and produced by Karin Heimdahl with original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez.

Fiction
Published: July 12, 2020, 6:50 p.m.

MADONNA SPECTACLE 4: THE QUEST FOR THE PHALLOS

The quest for the phallos.    This episode is not explicit.     Written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager.    MADONNA SPECTACLE - Kiba Walker    Produced by Karin Heimdahl    Script consultants Leeanne Stoddart and Remi J. Hovda.        Original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez. Sound effects either created by Karin or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license.    Øystein Ulsberg Brager is a freelance theatre director and playwright. He is joint artistic director of Imploding Fictions, and co-creator of the award winning audio fiction podcast The Amelia Project. He currently works as a dramaturg at the Norwegian regional theatre Unge Viken Teater where he also runs a young writers program.    Kiba Walker is an American actor, musician, director, writer, and performer based out of Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas. Kiba currently has one album out, titled "XO", that released in May 2016. He runs a music channel called "KibaKovers", adapting anime and video game openings into English for a broader audience, as well as regular Top 40 covers. He is also one of the champions of the hit Fort Worth Drag Competition, The 3, as Salem Moon!         Links:  Øystein Ulsberg Brager oysteinbrager.com Kiba Walker https://www.kibawalkervoices.com/ Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com Leeanne Stoddart https://www.instagram.com/leeanne_m_s/ Remi J. Hovda https://www.instagram.com/nabiyeongeisha/ Anthony Luis Sanchez https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8mqJY4bOeb4IP285vKj4OA  https://www.anthonyluissanchez.com/     TRANSCRIPT    MADONNA SPECTACLE I’m competing in a tri-state drag pageant. There’s a huge, shiny, phallic trophy and I want it. I sing “You’ll see”. I don’t lip-sync, I sing. It’s my thing. I have no monitor! I gesture to the sound guy. I try to make the gesturing into a dance move. He doesn’t get it. I forget my choreography. Now I’m singing out of key and trying to make up dance moves. I forget the lyrics. I kick the monitor. My heel breaks. I try to walk off, but suddenly my leg gives. I fall. My dress tears. The audience laughs. Then Madonna appears to me in the wings:   MADONNA SPECTACLE AS MADONNA, WHISPERING Madonna Spectacle... you don't need anyone at all!   MADONNA SPECTACLE I have a flash of inspiration, and as I drag my sorry drag-queen ass off the stage, I shout:   MADONNA SPECTACLE, SHOUTING, TEARY EYED AND BROKEN* I know I'll survive I know I'll stay alive!   MADONNA SPECTACLE They love me! They think it’s a comedy routine. I don’t get the trophy. I’m a genius. I’m not. I just have a really cool guardian angel.   Credits  This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was performed by Kiba Walker as Madonna Spectacle. It was written by Øystein Brager and produced by Karin Heimdahl with original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez.

Fiction
Published: July 12, 2020, 6:45 p.m.

MADONNA SPECTACLE 3: MONSTERMOM

Monstermom. This episode is not explicit. Written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager. MADONNA SPECTACLE - Kiba Walker DOLLY - Angélique Lazarus Produced by Karin Heimdahl Script consultants Leeanne Stoddart and Remi J. Hovda. Original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez. Øystein Ulsberg Brager is a freelance theatre director and playwright. He is joint artistic director of Imploding Fictions, and co-creator of the award winning audio fiction podcast The Amelia Project. He currently works as a dramaturg at the Norwegian regional theatre Unge Viken Teater where he also runs a young writers program. Kiba Walker is an American actor, musician, director, writer, and performer based out of Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas. Kiba currently has one album out, titled "XO", that released in May 2016. He runs a music channel called "KibaKovers", adapting anime and video game openings into English for a broader audience, as well as regular Top 40 covers. He is also one of the champions of the hit Fort Worth Drag Competition, The 3, as Salem Moon! An experienced educator, singer, and veteran of voice over, Angelique lends her voice and talent as Dolly in Madonna Spectacle. She started her voice acting career in 2016 with Ryan Estrada's "Big Data" in South Korea. Since then, Angelique has been in several audio drama productions as well as animations and content creation projects. Someone told her once she could play Ursula's bastard daughter and she's kind of into it.    Links: Øystein Ulsberg Brager oysteinbrager.com Kiba Walker https://www.kibawalkervoices.com/ Angelique Lazarus http://www.angeliquevoices.com Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com Leeanne Stoddart https://www.instagram.com/leeanne_m_s/ Remi J. Hovda https://www.instagram.com/nabiyeongeisha/ Anthony Luis Sanchez https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8mqJY4bOeb4IP285vKj4OA https://www.anthonyluissanchez.com/ TRANSCRIPT DOLLY, ON THE PHONE Honey, it’s me, mom. Your dad passed. You need to come home, funeral and all. And there’s this weeny-teeny little matter of signin’ some papers. You don’t want the house do you! MADONNA SPECTACLE I don’t know why she thinks I’m so stupid. I have done nothing else but navigate her lies since the nurse dried me clean of amniotic fluid and Dolly promised my dad there was absolutely no way I could belong to the mail man. I own half a house. I can only see through one eye. Passes after a day or so. Doctor says it’s nothing. I get a lawyer. Dolly has to sell. I buy a little studio flat on the edge of town. There’s even money left for a new outfit. A true copy of Madonna’s cone bra from 1990. I am... Madonna Spectacle! Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was performed by Kiba Walker as Madonna Spectacle and Angelique Lazarus as Dolly. It was written by Øystein Brager and produced by Karin Heimdahl with original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez.

Fiction
Published: July 12, 2020, 6:40 p.m.

MADONNA SPECTACLE 2: FROM RAGDOLL TO BRAGDOLL

From ragdoll to bragdoll. This episode is not explicit. Written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager. MADONNA SPECTACLE - Kiba Walker DOLLY - Angélique Lazarus Produced by Karin Heimdahl Script consultants Leeanne Stoddart and Remi J. Hovda. Original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez. Sound effects either created by Karin or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Øystein Ulsberg Brager is a freelance theatre director and playwright. He is joint artistic director of Imploding Fictions, and co-creator of the award winning audio fiction podcast The Amelia Project. He currently works as a dramaturg at the Norwegian regional theatre Unge Viken Teater where he also runs a young writers program. Kiba Walker is an American actor, musician, director, writer, and performer based out of Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas. Kiba currently has one album out, titled "XO", that released in May 2016. He runs a music channel called "KibaKovers", adapting anime and video game openings into English for a broader audience, as well as regular Top 40 covers. He is also one of the champions of the hit Fort Worth Drag Competition, The 3, as Salem Moon! An experienced educator, singer, and veteran of voice over, Angelique lends her voice and talent as Dolly in Madonna Spectacle. She started her voice acting career in 2016 with Ryan Estrada's ""Big Data"" in South Korea. Since then, Angelique has been in several audio drama productions as well as animations and content creation projects. Someone told her once she could play Ursula's bastard daughter and she's kind of into it.   Links: Øystein Ulsberg Brager oysteinbrager.com Kiba Walker https://www.kibawalkervoices.com/ Angelique Lazarus http://www.angeliquevoices.com Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com Leeanne Stoddart https://www.instagram.com/leeanne_m_s/ Remi J. Hovda https://www.instagram.com/nabiyeongeisha/ Anthony Luis Sanchez https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8mqJY4bOeb4IP285vKj4OA https://www.anthonyluissanchez.com/ TRANSCRIPT DOLLY, EX-MOM, NOW TRAITOR Listen, honey. Here’s 200 dollars. I know it’s just a disease, but I can’t have a sick person in my house, can I? It just makes me feel unsafe. You can always come back if you stop... you know... bein’ a deviant. Now, get! MADONNA SPECTACLE Screw you Dolly, ex-mom, now traitor. I arrive in the big city, more exhausted than I thought I’d be (all I’ve done is sit on a bus). My suitcase is full of dresses I stole from Dolly and I’ve been practicing in front of a mirror. MADONNA SPECTACLE, FROM MADONNA’S “LIVE TO TELL “I have a tale to tell Sometimes it gets so hard to hide it well” MADONNA SPECTACLE I even came up with a new name. Madonna Spectacle! You can survive anything if you have pizzazz! Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was performed by Kiba Walker as Madonna Spectacle and Angelique Lazarus as Dolly. It was written by Øystein Brager and produced by Karin Heimdahl with original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez.

Fiction
Published: July 12, 2020, 6:35 p.m.

MADONNA SPECTACLE 1: THE CREATION OF MADONNA SPECTACLE

The creation of Madonna Spectacle. This episode is not explicit. Written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager. MADONNA SPECTACLE - Kiba Walker Produced by Karin Heimdahl Script consultants Leeanne Stoddart and Remi J. Hovda. Original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez. Sound effects either created by Karin or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Øystein Ulsberg Brager is a freelance theatre director and playwright. He is joint artistic director of Imploding Fictions, and co-creator of the award winning audio fiction podcast The Amelia Project. He currently works as a dramaturg at the Norwegian regional theatre Unge Viken Teater where he also runs a young writers program. Kiba Walker is an American actor, musician, director, writer, and performer based out of Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas. Kiba currently has one album out, titled "XO", that released in May 2016. He runs a music channel called "KibaKovers", adapting anime and video game openings into English for a broader audience, as well as regular Top 40 covers. He is also one of the champions of the hit Fort Worth Drag Competition, The 3, as Salem Moon!   Links: Øystein Ulsberg Brager oysteinbrager.com Kiba Walker https://www.kibawalkervoices.com/ Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com Leeanne Stoddart https://www.instagram.com/leeanne_m_s/ Remi J. Hovda https://www.instagram.com/nabiyeongeisha/ Anthony Luis Sanchez https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8mqJY4bOeb4IP285vKj4OA https://www.anthonyluissanchez.com/ TRANSCRIPT MADONNA SPECTACLE In the beginning, there was darkness. I’m not formed yet. I’m a writhing mass of nerves hunched over a puke bucket. But then a voice whispers: MADONNA SPECTACLE, WHISPERING “Give me the light!” MADONNA SPECTACLE And suddenly, a beam of light pierces the darkness and I appear, fully formed, in a dress so bejeweled it’s to die for and a boa with feathers from a Phoenix! I am born, and my name is Madonna Spectacle! I sing “Vogue” and I am beautiful. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was performed by Kiba Walker as Madonna Spectacle. It was written by Øystein Brager and produced by Karin Heimdahl with original music by Anthony Luis Sanchez.

Fiction
Published: July 12, 2020, 6:30 p.m.

Alice in Wonderland – We’re All Mad Here - Part 1 of 3

Alice asks for directions. This episode is made for kids. Performed by Florence Hood as Alice and Hem Cleveland as The Cheshire Cat. Alice in Wonderland was written by Lewis Carroll, and this extract was produced and adapted by Karin Heimdahl. Florence Hood is a teller of tales. Purveyor of doughnuts. Owner of dog. Runs short fiction podcast Oncefictionpod https://twitter.com/oncefictionpod Hem Cleveland is Dungeon M'Lady and Producer of DnD podcast The Lucky Die. Among many other things. https://www.theluckydie.com/ Karin Heimdahl is the creator of audio drama Y2K. https://y2kpod.com/ TRANSCRIPT ALICE (timidly) Cheshire Cat (beat) Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?” CAT That depends a good deal on where you want to get to, ALICE I don’t much care where— CAT Then it doesn’t matter which way you go. ALICE (explains) —so long as I get somewhere. CAT Oh, you’re sure to do that, if you only walk long enough. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was performed by Florence Hood as Alice and Hem Cleveland as The Cheshire Cat. Alice in Wonderland was written by Lewis Carroll, and this version was produced and adapted by Karin Heimdahl. Music and sound effects from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license.

Fiction
Published: July 6, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

Lost Connections – part 7 of 8 (E8 D1)

David calls Elvira from another timeline. Elvira needs to talk David into helping her. David needs to convince Elvira to trust him. It’s basically a whole… wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey thing. This story in eight parts can be listened to in any order. To follow Elvira’s timeline, go E1-E8, and to follow David’s, D1-D8. This episode is not explicit. ELVIRA – Kirsty Woolven DAVID – Lee Shackleford Written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. To hear more from us, check out fiction podcasts Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Karin is the creator of audio drama Y2K. In 2019, she won an Audioverse award for writing a spoken word monologue. She is also a voice actor, podcaster and drama teacher turned project manager. Voice acting credits include Mirrors, Vampires of White Chapel, Copperheart and Hit the Bricks. She produces and co-hosts Det nya svarta, a pop culture podcast in Swedish. Karin lives in Gothenburg, Sweden. Y2K website https://y2kpod.com/ Listen https://y2kpod.com/episodes/ Arrivals https://arrivalspod.carrd.co/ Relativity https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT E8 D1 (dial tone, click) E: (nervous) Hello? D: (hesitant) Hi. Um, I got a message to call this number? E: (determined) You are David. D: (surprised) Yes. What’s this about? E: I need your help. D: Wait, who are you? E: It’s Elvira. D: O-kay? E: Of course. First one. You need to call me and make me… trust you. D W-what? E: We’re out of sync… D: What does that mean? E: Oh, I don’t have time to explain. It’s this whole wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey- D: (fills in) …timey-wimey thing? (small laugh) OK, fine. I’m in. E: Good. Call me again in two days. And… (very happy) thank you. (click) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl - that’s me. Kirsty Woolven voiced Elvira, and Lee Shackleford voiced David. To hear more from us, check out Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music "Somber Viola" by BigManJoe, also from Freesound.

Fiction
Published: July 6, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

Wolverine

Wolverine This episode is not explicit. Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically ""nerd-lesque."" It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT This episode of Listen Rinse Repeat is brought to you by Moxie LaBouche of Your Brain On Facts. Ready steady wash. Before his first turn as the comic book character Wolverine, Hugh Jackman wasted three weeks studying the behavior of wolves to incorporate into his performance, not knowing that a wolverine is a wholly unrelated species. You may now rinse your hands.

Fiction
Published: July 6, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

Teenage Central High - See Note

Pip gets a note asking how she feels about a special someone. This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear; performed by Jas LaFond, Steven LaFond, and Jacque Dear http://ninthworldjournal.com http://witcheverpath.com     TRANSCRIPT PIP "Do you like your current financial advisor?" HOCKETT Who's the note from? PIP Kelsey Hipperman. So what should I check? HOCKETT Well do you like him or do you like like him? PIP I don't know. HOCKETT I think he drives a Beemer, if that makes a difference. PIP You know, I probably shouldn't be dating in our current economic climate. Music: Aspire by Scott Holmes

Fiction
Published: July 6, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

Fox Sparrow

This is the song of the Fox Sparrow! This episode is not explicit. Recorded and narrated by Rob Porter. https://songbirding.com/ TRANSCRIPT This is the song of the Fox Sparrow

Fiction
Published: July 6, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

STILL ANOTHER BOARD MEETING

STILL ANOTHER BOARD MEETING This episode is not explicit. Written by Lee Shackleford and performed by Kyle Jones, Clarence Brown, and Lee Shackleford, all of the podcast DISCUSSING WHO. discussingwho.com TRANSCRIPT "STILL ANOTHER BOARD MEETING" PRESIDENT: Gentlemen, our podcast "Listen, Rinse, Repeat" has reached an important milestone. JENKINS: A million downloads? PRESIDENT: Better than that. COOPER: A major award? PRESIDENT: Better even than that. JENKINS: Major sponsor! COOPER: Endorsement of the CDC! JENKINS: Oh, I know! I bet a celebrity voice actor wants to record episodes for us! COOPER: Is it Mark Hamill? Please say it's Mark Hamill. PRESIDENT: Gentlemen, you're not even close. It's the highest honor we could achieve! JENKINS AND COOPER: What is it? PRESIDENT: My mother has subscribed to our podcast. NADIA: "Still Another Board Meeting" featured Kyle Jones, Clarence Brown, and Lee Shackleford -- all from the DISCUSSING WHO podcast.

Fiction
Published: July 6, 2020, 1 a.m.

Geographically Impaired

Raise your hand if you've always suspected your GPS is judging you... Geographically Impaired was written by Sebastian Michaels and performed by Scott Wachter, Producer, Get a Grip Studios (@FS_Wachter) and Julie Scala of Restless Shores podcast. Sebastian Michaels is Executive Producer @ Humdrum Media / Co-Founder of the Audio Fiction Network (an audio fiction community: https://discord.gg/duQYcmd). A sort of creative type. Does weird stuff that usually involves either writing, music, weird sounds and/or computers. Self-proclaimed Audio Fiction Nerd. Scott Wachter is an award winning podcast producer from Canada. Connect with him on Twitter @FS_Wachter. Julie Scala is a passionate, female voice-over artist offering commercial, narration, e-learning, telephony and audiobook services from her home studio in Portland, Maine. Find her at julie@juliescalamedia.com. TRANSCRIPT GPS: In 50 meters turn right on Goddard Aveenue. GRANDMA: Don't turn right there Matthew. There's construction. I know a shortcut. MATTHEW: The GPS says to turn there Grandma. I'm not sure we should take any shortcuts - don't want to get lost. GRANDMA: The GPS is wrong. Turn left at the stop sign. GPS: Turn right GRANDMA: Turn left. I grew up in this neighbourhood. SOUND: BLINKERS, TURNING LEFT. GPS: Turn right (BEAT) recalculating. In 30 meters turn left. GRANDMA: Stay straight. GPS: Turn left. SOUND: SOUNDS OF AN ACCIDENT (AN OVER THE TOP ONE) GRANDMA: That's not nice. GPS: Are you geographically impaired? If so, please leave the navigating to me. GRANDMA: Excuse me?! I will have you know I am in my prime! SOUND: SIRENS IN THE DISTANCE THE END

Fiction
Published: June 22, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

Strange Eggs - Chicken

Chickens lay strange eggs. This episode is not explicit. Story by PRRP, Music by Mx Michael https://www.patreon.com/freckle TRANSCRIPT Chickens lay edible eggs. Okay get this. Chickens are basically tiny modern dinosaurs, that another species subsists off of for almost every single meal. They’ll use chicken eggs for Cakes, for Quiche, or even just eat them plain! They’ll cook them through, or eat them raw if they’re boxing, they show no restraint. In fact, this other species, who says not to inject too personal of details into a facts-based podcast, even have basically ENSLAVED the chicken, due to its perceived evolutionary treat. How’s that for facts, huh? Is THAT too personal? You want more egg facts now? Hey, maybe Chickens don’t lay strange eggs, maybe YOU are just over reliant on your GLUTTONY and DOMINANCE to ever consider an alternative. There, now you have a complete whole dozen eggs to choose from, you can just scarf ‘em down. Eggs eggs eggs eggs eggs!!! Humans eat strange eggs. Music by Mx Michael

Fiction
Published: June 22, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

Fiona Sets the Record Straight

EPISODE 2: Fiona Sets the Record Straight This episode is not explicit. Written by: Kyle Jones http://discussingwho.com TRANSCRIPT My Darlings, for the record, don’t be offended when I threaten to turn off your internet connection when you do not listen, rinse, and repeat. I have to have a meeting scheduled with the Board. Shout out this time to the ladies and the dim-witted Chief at Bagels & Brunettes. This is Fiona Faucet. Ta-Ta for now. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written by Kyle Jones of the Discussing Who podcast and starred Fiona Faucet as herself. Find out more at Discussing Who.com.

Fiction
Published: June 22, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

Lost Connections – part 6 of 8 (E4 D8)

David calls Elvira from another timeline. Elvira needs to talk David into helping her. David needs to convince Elvira to trust him. It’s basically a whole… wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey thing. This story in eight parts can be listened to in any order. To follow Elvira’s timeline, go E1-E8, and to follow David’s, D1-D8. This episode is not explicit. ELVIRA – Kirsty Woolven DAVID – Lee Shackleford   Written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. To hear more from us, check out fiction podcasts Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Karin is the creator of audio drama Y2K. In 2019, she won an Audioverse award for writing a spoken word monologue. She is also a voice actor, podcaster and drama teacher turned project manager. Voice acting credits include Mirrors, Vampires of White Chapel, Copperheart and Hit the Bricks. She produces and co-hosts Det nya svarta, a pop culture podcast in Swedish. Karin lives in Gothenburg, Sweden. Y2K website https://y2kpod.com/ Listen https://y2kpod.com/episodes/ Arrivals https://arrivalspod.carrd.co/ Relativity https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT E4 D8 (dial tone, click) E: (urgent) Hello? D: Hi, it’s- E: David! D: (smiles) Elvira. E: It’s been coming back, in bits and pieces. It’s been so hard pretending I don’t remember. I’ve been thinking so much since yesterday that I- D: Listen. We have a plan to get you out. You’ll have a new guard. Password is ”river”. E: River. All right. Will I- will I meet *you*? D: (sad smile) No. Timey-wimey, remember? But you’ll see Sophie. E: (longing) Sophie. D: I hope you will be happy. Bye Elvira. (click) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl - that’s me. Kirsty Woolven voiced Elvira, and Lee Shackleford voiced David. To hear more from us, check out Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music ""Somber Viola"" by BigManJoe, also from Freesound.

Fiction
Published: June 22, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

Becky and the Volvo

Becky tries to get rid of her Volvo. This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear. Performed by Sarah Golding and David Ault. David is an Audible Approved Producer produces and performs in numerous audiobooks as well as the audio drama A Ninth World Journal and performs in several other audio dramas. https://ninthworldjournal.com https://sarahgoldingvoiceactorandmore.weebly.com/ http://www.davidault.co.uk/ TRANSCRIPT BECKY Do you like Volvos? GARY I love Volvos. BECKY How about this Volvo? Do you want this Volvo. GARY Are you giving me this Volvo? BECKY You can have this Volvo. GARY I don't think I want this Volvo. BECKY This Volvo? It's a free Volvo. GARY Free Volvo? No. No to the Volvo. BECKY But you like Volvos. GARY I love Volvos. Just not this Volvo. BECKY Oh. GARY Do you have another Volvo? BECKY No. Just this Volvo. GARY Oh. BECKY The drummer from Toto owned this Volvo. GARY Toto? Oh! (beat) It's still a no. Music is ""Music to Delight"" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: June 22, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

Troy Leon Greg

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT In 1980, Troy Leon Greg and three other convicted murderers escaped death row in Georgia. The escape wasn’t discovered until Greg called a newspaper to brag about it. He was killed the same night in a bar fight as he got aggressive with a waitress. He actually would have lived slightly longer if he’d stayed in jail.

Fiction
Published: June 22, 2020, 1 a.m.

PSA FAILURE

The announcer can't get behind what he's selling. This episode is not explicit. "PSA FAILURE" was written and performed by Lee Shackleford of RELATIVITY. https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT "PSA FAILURE" PRODUCER: And we're rolling. SFX: BEEP ANNOUNCER: (reading) "At times it can seem there’s nothing but bad news in the world. But you’ll be glad to know there are signs that things may be finally ..." Who's going to believe this? PRODUCER: Try it again. SFX: BEEP ANNOUNCER: "At times it can seem there’s nothing but bad news in the world. But you’ll be glad to know -- " (He cracks up laughing) SFX: BEEP ANNOUNCER: "At times it can seem there’s -- " (He cracks up laughing) SFX: BEEP ANNOUNCER: (Now reading in absurdly melodramatic voice) "At times it can seem there’s nothing but bad news in the world. But you’ll be glad to know there are signs that things may be finally looking up!" You mean, like that? SFX: BEEP NADIA: "PSA FAILURE" was written and performed by Lee Shackleford of the RELATIVITY podcast.

Fiction
Published: June 15, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

Samoa Flu

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT American Samoa was one of the only places not to see a single Spanish flu death, because the governor took the reports he was hearing seriously and blocked all incoming ships from making port.

Fiction
Published: June 15, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

Bac & Teria 6

Just when our pair thought they were safe... This episode is not explicit. Written by Paul Lonsdale, produced and performed by Vin Ernst TRANSCRIPT Bac Phew. I was worried for a second there. Teria What do we do now? Bac [relieved] I don’t know. Teria Well I’ll just wait here while you think of something. Bac It’s too cold - I can’t think! [pause] Teria Uhh.. Bac, did you feel that? Bac Feel wha... oh no! [sound of water filtration] Teria The force is back! Bac This is Teria. We’re done for! Teria Bye Bac! Bac Bye Teria!

Fiction
Published: June 15, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

Attention TawdryMart shoppers, part 3

Those Caped Couponers are really a pain in the backside, I tell ya. This episode is not explicit. Written by Shannon Perry of Oz 9; performed by Hannah McIver Shannon Perry is the creator and complete disaster behind Oz 9. Hannah is a Northern actor/singer who would love to do more voiceover work alongside performing. During these crazy times Hannah stays sane by keeping creative. Find her on Twitter @hanmciver. https://oz-9.com TRANSCRIPT Attention TawdryMart shoppers, Welcome to our first 4 AM Fill-‘er-Up. Before we let this astonishingly large crowd into the aisles, we’d like to apologize for several recent marketing campaigns, including Petit Fours for the Petite, Pasta for Pastors, and the hugely unpopular Give It Up for Lentils flash sale on beef burgers. Martin has been removed from marketing and returned to egg checking in the dairy aisle — do feel free to stop by and say hello. CAPED COUPONERS, BACK BEHIND THE LINE. If you’re ready to Fill Er Up, remember, you have until 4:05 AM to max out your cart to get 15 percent of everything. Are you rrrrrready? [bell] Music: “Such a swinging good time” by Neil Cross, Storyblocks

Fiction
Published: June 15, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

Tummy Troubles

A brief introduction to Physician Imhotep This episode is not explicit. By King Kurus & Family www.blackhistorybuff.com TRANSCRIPT Scene starts in the bathroom with a toilet flush Sfx>Toilet flush< Kid cries out>Mum mum, I’m not feeling to good I’ve got belly ache Mum exasperated >what again? right I’ve had enough I’m gonna take you to see the Imhotep Kid > who’s Imhotep? Bhb> This is King Kurus from the black history buff podcast take a seat lady I’ve got this Imhotep was a polymath Mum>Polly who BHB>Polymath it means someone who’s good at lots of things A genius basically. He lived in ancient Egypt and is known the father of modern medicine Kid>oh so he’s a doctor, mum I don’t want to go to the doctors BHB>not just a doctor, he was an astronomer, architect, poet, mathametican and on top of all that he build the pyramids Kid> no way, how did he do all that Mum> by not playing Nintendo all day that’s how BHB>That’s right Imhotep studied very hard and was inventing medical procedures nearly 4000 years ago Both>no way BHB> yes way Imhotep diagnosed and treated over 200 diseases, and even did did some dentistry Mum> well thank you very much mr black buff history Dad> er black history buff Mum>right come on you were off to see the Imhotep Kid> but mum Mum> don’t you but me! come on hurry up Everyone>and wash your handsssssssssss END

Fiction
Published: June 15, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

Strange Eggs - Seahorse

Seahorses lay strange eggs. This episode is not explicit. Story by PRRP, Music by Mx Michael patreon.com/freckle TRANSCRIPT Seahorses lay strange eggs.

Fiction
Published: June 15, 2020, 1 a.m.

Lost Connections – part 5 of 8 (E3 D7)

David calls Elvira from another timeline. Elvira needs to talk David into helping her. David needs to convince Elvira to trust him. It’s basically a whole… wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey thing. This story in eight parts can be listened to in any order. To follow Elvira’s timeline, go E1-E8, and to follow David’s, D1-D8. This episode is not explicit. ELVIRA – Kirsty Woolven DAVID – Lee Shackleford Written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. To hear more from us, check out fiction podcasts Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Karin is the creator of audio drama Y2K. In 2019, she won an Audioverse award for writing a spoken word monologue. She is also a voice actor, podcaster and drama teacher turned project manager. Voice acting credits include Mirrors, Vampires of White Chapel, Copperheart and Hit the Bricks. She produces and co-hosts Det nya svarta, a pop culture podcast in Swedish. Karin lives in Gothenburg, Sweden. Y2K website https://y2kpod.com/ Listen https://y2kpod.com/episodes/ Arrivals https://arrivalspod.carrd.co/ Relativity https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT E3 D7 (dial tone, click) E: Hello. D: Elvira? It’s David. E: It’s you. Hello again. Hang on. (door closing) D: I talked to Sophie today. E: Sophie? D: Yeah. Sophie. She says hi. E: (verge of tears) My… Sophie? Wait. Where is she? D: (gently) She is safe. But she misses you. E: How do I- I can’t believe- I didn’t remember her until just now. (distressed) What is happening to me? D: (gently) They took your memories. I am sorry. I’ll call again. (click) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl - that’s me. Kirsty Woolven voiced Elvira, and Lee Shackleford voiced David. To hear more from us, check out Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music ""Somber Viola"" by BigManJoe, also from Freesound.

Fiction
Published: June 10, 2020, 1:40 a.m.

Attention TawdryMart shoppers, part 2

Everything at TawdryMart is top shelf. And Martin's a bit of an idiot. This episode is not explicit. Written by Shannon Perry of Oz 9; performed by Hannah McIver Shannon Perry is the creator and complete disaster behind Oz 9. Hannah is a Northern actor/singer who would love to do more voiceover work alongside performing. During these crazy times Hannah stays sane by keeping creative. Find her on Twitter @hanmciver. https://oz-9.com TRANSCRIPT Attention TawdryMart shoppers, Because everything at TawdryMart is top shelf, for the next hour everything that’s on the top shelf is 60 percent off! WAIT FOR IT. If you can reach it, you can keep it [aside] – god, Martin, that doesn’t even rhyme. Do you put any effort into these? [back to tannoy] Small ladders and step stools have been placed about the shop for our- [aside] I’m not saying that. [listen] It’s not funny, Martin. [listen] FINE. [back to tannoy] Step stools are available for our … low-altitude patrons. Enjoy top shelf goods… for less. Are you rrrrrrrrready? [bell] Music: “Such a swinging good time” by Neil Cross, Storyblocks

Fiction
Published: June 10, 2020, 1:35 a.m.

Senior Superheroes - A Typical Monday

Mondays are the worst, if it's actually Monday. This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear, producer of A Ninth World Journal David is an Audible Approved Producer produces and performs in numerous audiobooks as well as the audio drama A Ninth World Journal and performs in several other audio dramas. https://ninthworldjournal.com   Featuring: Erin B. Lillis as Special Early Bird http://www.erinlillis.com/ Tim Sherburn as Professor Badboom https://www.voices.com/demo_detail/126060 Music is ""Take a Chance"" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ TRANSCRIPT GRAMPSMAN Professor Badboom, we meet agai- Where is he? SPECIAL EARLY BIRD He's probably at his secret hideout. GRAMPSMAN No, he comes to the factory on Thursdays. SPECIAL EARLY BIRD That's why he's not here. Today's Monday. GRAMPSMAN Monday? I thought today was Thursday. SPECIAL EARLY BIRD No, it's Monday. All day. GRAMPSMAN Oh. (beat) Want to see if ShopStore has a sale on ribbon candy? SPECIAL EARLY BIRD Sure. GRAMPSMAN Would you mind flying? My hip's bothering me today SPECIAL EARLY BIRD How many times have I told you you should really get that looked at?

Fiction
Published: June 10, 2020, 1:30 a.m.

Bac & Teria 5

Our pair is being pulled in by a strong force. This episode is not explicit. Written by Paul Lonsdale, produced and performed by Vin Ernst TRANSCRIPT [loud sound of water filtration] Teria Bac? What is it? Bac It’s some sort of [shudder] cleaning facility, Teria. We need to get out. Teria But the force - it’s too strong, we’ll never get out! Bac [worried] But we have to! [water filtration louder] Teria I love you Bac! Bac I love you too Teria! [water filtration stops] Teria The force - it’s stopped.

Fiction
Published: June 10, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

YET ANOTHER BOARD MEETING

"YET ANOTHER BOARD MEETING This episode is not explicit. Written by Lee Shackleford and performed by Kyle Jones, Clarence Brown, and Lee Shackleford, all of the podcast DISCUSSING WHO. discussingwho.com TRANSCRIPT "YET ANOTHER BOARD MEETING" PRESIDENT: Gentlemen, our podcast "Listen, Rinse, Repeat" needs more of that show about the lady cops. Uh -- "Burgers and Broads." COOPER: I think that's ""Bagels and Brunettes,"" sir. PRESIDENT: Are you sure? It ought to be "Burgers and Broads." Much better title. JENKINS: The truth is, sir, it's difficult to tell which of our podcast's many continuing series is most popular. PRESIDENT: Well, however we do it, we have to crush the competition. COOPER: What competition's that, sir? PRESIDENT: All the other shows like ours! JENKINS: Shows featuring bizarrely random content in under a minute? PRESIDENT: Right! COOPER: Uh, sir, I'd say we have that market all to ourselves. PRESIDENT: Excellent! I'd give everybody a Christmas bonus but -- it's summertime. JENKINS: Well, yeah. COOPER: No, I see that. NADIA: "Yet Another Board Meeting" featured Kyle Jones, Clarence Brown, and Lee Shackleford -- all from the DISCUSSING WHO podcast.

Fiction
Published: June 10, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

RessuciAnne

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically ""nerd-lesque."" It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPThe standard-issue female CPR training dummy, called RessuciAnne, got her face from the death mask of a young woman who drowned in the Seine in Paris. The death mask was made so her family could hopefully later identify her, but artists started buying copies for inspiration.

Fiction
Published: June 10, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

Erik McGuffin - Salesman

Erik McGuffin is once again desperate to land a sale. This episode is made for kids. Written, Preformed and Edited by Harlan Guthrie Dice Shame is an actual play, Dungeons & Dragons Podcast created by a group of friends who love telling adventure stories. If you enjoyed this, check them out! www.diceshamepodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Hello? Oh hello there, this is Erik McGuffin, I can sell and DO ANYTHING YOU NEED. For example; do you need your windows cleaned? No. Ducts cleaned? Don’t like ducks. Driveway paved? I park in the lane. Lane way paved! Don’t drive You just said you park in the laneway Yes, I park my bike there. Do you. Do you need your gears cleaned? No. Your seat adjusted? No. Your Tires pumped? Yes. Aha! Can I interest you In my services! I will arrive at your home, any time or day you’d like and pump up your bicycle tires so it is ready to go whenever you may need it! No. No, why not? Someone stole my bicycle. Ah. Would you like to purchase a bicycle Storyblocks

Fiction
Published: June 8, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

Strange Eggs - Whelk

Whelks lay strange eggs. This episode is not explicit. Story by PRRP, Music by Mx Michael https://www.patreon.com/freckle TRANSCRIPT Whelks lay connected eggs. I’ve gotten feedback that my last couple episodes haven’t been as informative as my previous ones. I’m trying my best. It’s an audio medium and I’m trying to describe things that are really pictorial. The whelk is like a snail whose eggs are all attached. If you wanna find out what this is, just Google “mermaid necklace” and you’ll find a picture of what I’m talking about. We have a limited amount of time, and it doesn’t behoove me to explain in excruciating detail everything about these eggs. Whelks lay strange eggs.

Fiction
Published: June 8, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

Lost Connections – part 4 of 8 (E6 D3)

David calls Elvira from another timeline. Elvira needs to talk David into helping her. David needs to convince Elvira to trust him. It’s basically a whole… wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey thing. This story in eight parts can be listened to in any order. To follow Elvira’s timeline, go E1-E8, and to follow David’s, D1-D8. This episode is not explicit. ELVIRA – Kirsty Woolven DAVID – Lee Shackleford Written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. To hear more from us, check out fiction podcasts Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Karin is the creator of audio drama Y2K. In 2019, she won an Audioverse award for writing a spoken word monologue. She is also a voice actor, podcaster and drama teacher turned project manager. Voice acting credits include Mirrors, Vampires of White Chapel, Copperheart and Hit the Bricks. She produces and co-hosts Det nya svarta, a pop culture podcast in Swedish. Karin lives in Gothenburg, Sweden. Y2K website https://y2kpod.com/ Listen https://y2kpod.com/episodes/ Arrivals https://arrivalspod.carrd.co/ Relativity https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT E6 D3 (dial tone, click) E: Hello D: Elvira. It’s David. E: Oh David. It worked! I- D: Um, haven’t done whatever it is… yet… E: Right. Sorry. What number? D: Three for me. E: I’m at six. (checks notebook, pages turning) You have… one more where I’ll know you. Won’t be in order for you though. D: OK. What do I do? E: Right. One. Make me trust you. Two. Tell me about Sophie. Three- D: Wait, Sophie who? E: You haven’t talked to her yet. D: OK. E: You will. (beat) Have to go. Call again! (click) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl - that’s me. Kirsty Woolven voiced Elvira, and Lee Shackleford voiced David. To hear more from us, check out Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music ""Somber Viola"" by BigManJoe, also from Freesound.

Fiction
Published: June 8, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

Attention TawdryMart shoppers, part 1

Grab your Affordabuddy (TM) and get ready to ruuummmmble! This episode is not explicit. Written by Shannon Perry of Oz 9; performed by Hannah McIver Shannon Perry is the creator and complete disaster behind Oz 9. Hannah is a Northern actor/singer who would love to do more voiceover work alongside performing. During these crazy times Hannah stays sane by keeping creative. Find her on Twitter @hanmciver https://oz-9.com TRANSCRIPT Attention TawdryMart shoppers, It’s Tuesday at 2 PM, and you know what that means. Grab your Affordabuddy — TM — and get ready to rumble. Today’s two-for-one free-for-all is in the meat section. We have a 30-pack of Uncle Danny’s Might-Be Meat- hang on. [pause] Sorry, Mighty Meat Sausages at half price, and the Affordabuddies who make it there first- OY! Caped Couponers, back behind the line and wait for the bell! The affordabuddies who make it to the freezer first get one pack free and the pick of the litter. Are you rrrrrready? [bell] Music: “Such a swinging good time” by Neil Cross, Storyblocks"

Fiction
Published: June 8, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

Bac & Teria 4

Our pair hears something scary up ahead. This episode is not explicit. Written by Paul Lonsdale, produced and performed by Vin Ernst TRANSCRIPT Bac Teria? Teria? What happened? [pause] Teria? [pause] TERIA? [splash] Teria Bac! Bac [shiver] Ahhhhhh! This is cold and horrible! Teria [faint sound of water filtration] I don’t like it either! It’s moving faster than the ‘slide’. Bac [with some concern] It is, isn’t it? Uh oh.... [pause] Teria What is it Bac? Bac I ... [pause] No, I don’t think you want to know. [slightly louder sound of water filtration]

Fiction
Published: June 8, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

ANOTHER BOARD MEETING

ANOTHER BOARD MEETING This episode is not explicit. Written by Lee Shackleford and performed by Kyle Jones, Clarence Brown, and Lee Shackleford, all of the podcast DISCUSSING WHO. discussingwho.com TRANSCRIPT "ANOTHER BOARD MEETING" PRESIDENT: Gentlemen, I want our podcast "Listen, Rinse, Repeat" to remain competitive at all costs! COOPER: Well, sir, the reports from our customer surveys tell us we're doing very well. People love the podcast. JENKINS: It's true, sir -- in fact, most of them say they find it to be, uh -- (checks papers) sweet. COOPER: And they identify you with the product, so they apparently also find YOU to be ... sweet. PRESIDENT: "Sweet"? "SWEET"? JENKINS: Well, that's what the survey -- PRESIDENT: (dangerous) Do YOU think I'm "sweet"? COOPER: Oh, no, sir! JENKINS: No, no. PRESIDENT: WHAT?! COOPER: No, no, but yes! JENKINS: We mean -- yes! Unless, uh -- PRESIDENT: (struggling) Well ... urrgh ... as long they keep listening, I suppose -- COOPER: And washing their hands -- PRESIDENT: -- and washing their hands, I suppose I can ... accept being ... sweet. JENKINS: Good for you, sir! NADIA: "Another Board Meeting" featured Kyle Jones, Clarence Brown, and Lee Shackleford -- all from the DISCUSSING WHO podcast.

Fiction
Published: June 8, 2020, 1 a.m.

Bottle of Sprite

What exactly happens when you're trapped in a jar? This episode is not explicit. Performed by James Schwarz, David Miller, Elizabeth Wilcox, Amanda Kreitler, and Zac Kreitler. Written by Zac Kreitler www.dimensiondoorpodcast.com www.podchaser.com/thedimensiondoorpodcast TRANSCRIPT Lisa: dermo. Vrixx, you are filthy! How could someone SO small have SO MUCH crud on them? I ask you Vrixx: If you would just let me out of this stupid jar, I could clean myself off! Norm: Well you SHOULD get washed up. As a doctor, I’ve seen how dirty hands love to spread commutative diseases. Marge: Communicable, sweetie. Norm: Oh, right. Communicable. Thanks, hon! Valdeen: Come to think of it, how did you get so dirty INSIDE the jar? Did you have the dirt in your pockets? Vrixx: It’s interdimensional

Fiction
Published: June 5, 2020, 3:25 a.m.

SK Fans

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically ""nerd-lesque."" It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT For the last hundred years, many people in South Korea have believed that leaving a fan on overnight will kill you in your sleep, either by suffocating you or freezing you. While the exact origin of the belief is unclear, suspicion has fallen on the SK government starting the rumor during the 70s energy crisis to get people to use less electricity.

Fiction
Published: June 5, 2020, 3:20 a.m.

Give and Take

Don’t anthropomorphise. This episode is not explicit. Written by Clare O'Brien, courtesy of 50-Word Stories. Performed by Angela Kanwar as Chloe and Sophie Ryder as Claudette.. Produced by Karin Heimdahl. (Sophie Ryder) Writing licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Previously PR to a politician and PA to a rock star, Clare now lives noisily in Scotland, writing her first novel, Light Switch. Her work has recently appeared in Mslexia, The London Reader, Spelk, Cabinet of Heed, Northwords Now, and anthologies from The Emma Press and Hedgehog Poetry. Find out more at http://clarevobrien.weebly.com/ Angela Kanwar is a versatile British Voiceover Artist with a warm, engaging and assuring tone. www.linkedin.com/in/angela-kanwar-b2784729 Find Sophie Ryder on Twitter https://twitter.com/SophieRyderVA 50-Word Stories https://fiftywordstories.com/ Karin Heimdahl produces audio drama Y2K https://y2kpod.com TRANSCRIPT CHLOE Sometimes, when I look into his eyes, I swear he understands everything I’m saying. CLAUDETTE Don’t anthropomorphise. They’re only human. NARRATOR/CHLOE Chloe licked the man’s hand as he scraped leftovers into their bowls. What did it matter, anyway? They were onto a good thing here. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Angela Kanwar as Chloe and Sophie Ryder as Claudette. It was produced by Karin Heimdahl and written by Clare O'Brien, courtesy of fiftywordstories.com Clare lives in Scotland, writing her first novel, Light Switch. Music by Chip Michael. Sound effects from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license.

Fiction
Published: June 5, 2020, 3:15 a.m.

Oosiks

Anikah and Rose wonder if a tourist is brave enough to go into George's antique shop. This episode is not explicit. Voiced by Kari Aguila and Taylor Edwards of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Oosiks. Oh, I’ve gotta go, Anikah. I see some tourists coming up to my produce stand. I’ll talk to you soon. Yesterday a tourist off the Queen of the Gulls stopped me on Main Street and asked about a public restroom. Really? What’d you say? "Well," I said. "You can always use the one in George's Antiques Shop.” I pointed across the street to the ramshackle little shop and the woman turned to go. "Oh, and by the way," I shouted to her, "George sometimes likes to hide behind the giant Oosik bones when he sees someone he doesn't know." Oh, George and his oosiks! "Oosik?" she asked. "Yeah. Walrus penis bones. He has quite a collection behind the obituaries and the handcuffs and the… You know what? Never mind. You’ll be fine." Did she go in? About ten minutes later, I saw that same tourist, coming out of the woods buttoning up her jeans. She just went in the woods? What’s up with that? This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Kari Aguila and Taylor Edwards of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: June 5, 2020, 3:10 a.m.

Lost in Place - Day 18

There may be something dangerous in the woods with them This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear; performed by Raj Jawa and Stephanie Bergeron http://ninthworldjournal.com  http://rajjawa.com   http://stephaniebergeron.com   TRANSCRIPT A strange sound is heard GUS What was that? KELLY I don't know... what do you think it was? GUS It sounded like... an orthopedic surgeon. KELLY What would an orthopedic surgeon be doing out here? GUS I don't know, but I'm really scared. KELLY Me too. (beat) Are orthopedic surgeons vegetarians? GUS I don't think so, Kelly. KELLY Hold, me, Gus. SFX Credits: Large Warehouse/Factory Ambience https://freesound.org/people/fimrod/sounds/278987/ Black Throated Diver Calling https://www.freesfx.co.uk/sfx/Black-Throated-Diver Box Falling Down Stairs https://www.freesfx.co.uk/sfx/drop-box-stairs Drop Several Silverware Utensils on Hard Surface https://www.freesfx.co.uk/sfx/drop-silverware-hard Hammering on Metal Pipe https://www.freesfx.co.uk/sfx/Hammering-Metal-Pipe Volvo Car Horn Honks Short and Long https://freesfx.co.uk/sfx/Volvo-Car City Park Ambience WIth Distant Traffic https://www.freesfx.co.uk/sfx/City-Park-Ambience Music Credits: Paradise by Music For Makers (Paid Commercial License) https://musicformakers.com/songs/paradise/ Among the Clouds by Music For Makers (Paid Commercial License) https://musicformakers.com/songs/among-the-clouds/ Vacation Days by Music For Makers (Paid Commercial License) https://musicformakers.com/songs/vacation-days/ Lullaby Sting by Twin Musicom http://www.twinmusicom.org/song/147/lullaby-stab

Fiction
Published: June 5, 2020, 3:05 a.m.

Bac & Teria 3

Our pair finds themselves moving very fast in the dark. This episode is not explicit. Written by Paul Lonsdale, produced and performed by Vin Ernst TRANSCRIPT Teria Where are we? Bac I don’t know Teria but we’re moving very fast. Eeeeeee Teria I want to get off Bac! I don’t like it. Bac But it’s funnnnn. Eeeeeeee Teria But I feel sick! Bac Okay, okay Teria. I don’t know where we are. [pause] But I think it’s some sort of slide. Eeeeeee. Teria A slide Bac? But it’s dark and scary and I want to get off! Bac I see light again, just in front of you - [splash] Bac & Teria by Paul Lonsdale

Fiction
Published: June 5, 2020, 3 a.m.

Lost Connections – part 3 of 8 (E5 D5)

David calls Elvira from another timeline. Elvira needs to talk David into helping her. David needs to convince Elvira to trust him. It’s basically a whole… wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey thing. This story in eight parts can be listened to in any order. To follow Elvira’s timeline, go E1-E8, and to follow David’s, D1-D8. This episode is not explicit. ELVIRA – Kirsty Woolven DAVID – Lee Shackleford Written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. To hear more from us, check out fiction podcasts Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Karin is the creator of audio drama Y2K. In 2019, she won an Audioverse award for writing a spoken word monologue. She is also a voice actor, podcaster and drama teacher turned project manager. Voice acting credits include Mirrors, Vampires of White Chapel, Copperheart and Hit the Bricks. She produces and co-hosts Det nya svarta, a pop culture podcast in Swedish. Karin lives in Gothenburg, Sweden. Y2K website https://y2kpod.com/ Listen https://y2kpod.com/episodes/ Arrivals https://arrivalspod.carrd.co/ Relativity https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT E5 D5 (dial tone, click) E: Hello. D: Elvira? E: (happy) Hi David. D: Phew! So this must be the last one where you know me. E: Right. (checks notebook, pages turning) Good to know. Number? D: Five. E: Me too. (beat) Thank you. D: Haven’t done it yet. E: No. But you will. So. Talked to Sophie yet? D: No. E: She’ll turn up. Keep calling. D: I will. You said something about a step three? E: Oh. (beat) You’ll figure it out. (gently) Bye David. (click) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl - that’s me. Kirsty Woolven voiced Elvira, and Lee Shackleford voiced David. To hear more from us, check out Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music ""Somber Viola"" by BigManJoe, also from Freesound.

Fiction
Published: June 4, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

Strange Eggs - Robin

Robins lay blue eggs. This episode is not explicit. Story by PRRP, Music by Mx Michael https://www.patreon.com/freckle TRANSCRIPT Robins lay blue eggs. Sorry I got on a tangent last time. We only have like 50 seconds so I wasn’t able to steer it back in time, so this one’s gonna be a lot shorter. Robins are a bird that cheep, their eggs are so blue they even have a color named after them: Robin’s Egg Blue. Robins lay strange eggs.

Fiction
Published: June 4, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

Miss Unsinkable

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT Violet “Miss Unsinkable” Jessop was a stewardess and nurse aboard White Star Line passenger ships.  She survived the sinking of the Titanic, which hit an iceberg, the Britannic, which hit a sea mine, and the Olympic, which collided with a British warship.

Fiction
Published: June 4, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

Three Rounds

What can YOU do in twenty seconds? This episode is not explicit. Performed by James Schwarz, David Miller, Elizabeth Wilcox, Amanda Kreitler, and Zac Kreitler. Written by Elizabeth Wilcox. Elizabeth is the Social Media Coordinator for and voices Vasilisa on The Dimension Door Podcast dimensiondoorpodcast.com podchaser.com/thedimensiondoorpodcast TRANSCRIPT GM: A lot can happen in 20 seconds Valdeen: I could empty my pistol Vasilisa: I could cast several spells Marge: I could run over 200 feet! Unless there’s lots of snow, of course Norm: I could apply poison to three darts, even if I’m really careful GM: Or, we could just wash our hands!

Fiction
Published: June 4, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

Bac & Teria 2

Our pair find each other, but covered by a strange substance. This episode is not explicit. Written by Paul Lonsdale, produced and performed by Vin Ernst TRANSCRIPT Bac Teria? Teria?! Teria Bac? Is that... you? Bac Yes it’s meeee! Teria Wow I am glad to see... hear you! Bac Me too Teria! [pause] It’s very dark down here. Teria It is, isn’t it! And we’re moving very fast. What’s this stuff we’re covered in? Bac Soo.. soap.. I think?

Fiction
Published: June 4, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

Skateboards 4 Babies

An ad for the very good company Skateboards 4 Babies This episode is not explicit. All the stuff: Kendon Luscher https://www.buzzsprout.com/815707 TRANSCRIPT Narrator: Do you like to shred? Skateboards 4 Babies is the only skateboard made for babies to shred. Guy: Whoa. That's a cool baby. Where'd it get that skateboard? Narrator: It got that skateboard from skateboards for babies. Guy: Oh yeah. That's cool. I should probably get a baby so I can get a Skateboards 4 Babies for my baby. Narrator: Heck yeah. Skateboards 4 Babies. Yeah. Guy: I'll get on that. Kendon Luscher

Fiction
Published: June 4, 2020, 1 a.m.

Coronavirus Resolutions

Resolutions for these times. This episode is not explicit. Written by Marjan Sierhuis, courtesy of 50-Word Stories. Produced and performed by Lorraine Ansell. Writing licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Marjan Sierhuis enjoys reading and writing flash fiction. http://twitter.com/MarjanSierhuis Lorraine Ansell is an experienced voice and delights in telling stories from all walks of life globally. www.lorrainevoiceart.com 50-Word Stories https://fiftywordstories.com/ TRANSCRIPT Darn the holes in the socks Touch up grey hair roots Get up close and personal with some favorite cooking shows Organize the kitchen cupboards Attack the dust bunnies that reside under the bed Binge read every single story published on 50-Word Stories Or sit around and do absolutely nothing Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced and produced by Lorraine Ansell, and written by Marjan Sierhuis courtesy of fiftywordstories.com Marjan Sierhuis enjoys reading and writing flash fiction.

Fiction
Published: June 1, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

Three-fer Assasination

Seward was almost killed the same night as Lincoln. This episode is not explicit. Voiced by Michael Crowley and Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Three-Fer Assasination. You’ve all heard about how Secretary of State Seward bought Alaska in 1867 and was laughed at for the rest of his life, but it should also be remembered that he was a close friend of President Abraham Lincoln, and was nearly assassinated the same night as Lincoln. On April 14, 1865, John Wilkes Booth loaded his gun and headed to the Ford’s Theater, George Atzerodt chickened out before trying to kill Vice President Johnson, and Lewis Powell walked into Secretary Seward’s bedroom and slashed him to ribbons with a knife. He survived, but it was planned to be a three-fer assassination! Living here in Broken, Alaska, we know there are many sides to every person, even Secretary Seward. Maybe even you. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Michael Crowley and Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: June 1, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

Bac & Teria 1

Our pair is swept away to a strange place. This episode is not explicit. Written by Paul Lonsdale, produced by Vin Ernst, performed by Vin Ernst, David S. Dear, and Karin Heimdahl TRANSCRIPT Man [Entering doorway] Honey I'm home! Woman [Shouting from upstairs] Don't forget to wash your hands! Man Doing it! [Squirting soap on hands] Germ #1 - Teria (female) Oh my gosh, what is this?! Germ #2 - Bac (male) I don't know but it's sticky, eww [Sound of water from tap] Teria Noooo, Bac! Don't leave me Bac [Fading] I'll miss you Teria! Teria [Fading] I'm right behind youuuuu Bac [In a tunnel] Ooo it’s gone all dark. Bac & Teria by Paul Lonsdale

Fiction
Published: June 1, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

Teenage Central High - Algo-Rhythm

Hockett's having trouble figuring out who to take to the dance on Friday. This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear; performed by Jas LaFond, Steven LaFond, and Jacque Dear http://ninthworldjournal.com http://witcheverpath.com TRANSCRIPT PIP Who are you taking to the dance on Friday? HOCKETT Well, it's a toss-up between Scotty French and Tammy Twinlake. PIP Tough choice. How are you going to decide? HOCKETT Well I wrote an algorithm that factors in popularity, dancing skills, what kind of car they drive, clique associations, and SAT scores. PIP And hotness. Don't forget the hotness factor. HOCKETT Oh yeah. That complicates things. (beat) You know what? I'll just take my twin brother. Music: Aspire by Scott Holmes

Fiction
Published: June 1, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

Vulnerable

A poem to serve as a reminder that Blackness should not be weaponized This episode is not explicit. Written and Performed by Jefferi Lee https://tgot.webflow.io TRANSCRIPT I am powerful, but in my presence you are not vulnerable. Do not fear me for the color of my skin. In fact, understand that I am afraid and others fear for me. Because I am powerful, and in your presence that makes me vulnerable. Music: Drums of the Deep by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/3681-drums-of-the-deep License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: June 1, 2020, 1 a.m.

1632 West 21st Street Part 12

If the thing scratching around Margaret's window wasn't Michael.... what was it? This episode is not explicit. Performed by Lee Shackleford of Relativity Podcast; written by Shannon Perry of Oz 9. Shannon Perry is the creator and writer of the scifi comedy podcast Oz 9. Lee Shackleford is the creator and writer of the scifi audio drama Relativity. https://oz-9.com/ https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT Dear Margaret. I’m not sure if you’re kidding or not, but I didn’t do that. I will admit I considered it, or something like it, but then the storm started, and I decided to stay in bed and scare the crap out of you some other time. I have checked the latch on your window and reset the alarm. If you’d like me to sleep on the floor in your room tonight, I’m happy to. Michael. Music: Escaping Forever by Michael Vignola, Audioblocks

Fiction
Published: May 29, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

1632 West 21st Street Part 11

Something kept Margaret awake last night, and it wasn't a ukelele. (and that's not a metaphor) This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Shannon Perry of Oz 9. Shannon Perry is the creator and writer of the scifi comedy podcast Oz 9. Lee Shackleford is the creator and writer of the scifi audio drama Relativity. https://oz-9.com/ https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT Dear Michael. I imagine you thought it was hilarious to come scratch around my window in the dead of night and pretend to try to get in. Your commitment to scaring me is admirable, given the storm, but joke’s on you, I’m afraid. You got drenched. I got a slightly interrupted but otherwise satisfactory night’s sleep. Margaret. Music: Your Wicked Ways by Richard J. Freitas and Geraldine Brioso, Audioblocks

Fiction
Published: May 29, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

1632 West 21st Street Part 10

Michael can be mean. But just how mean is he? This episode is not explicit. Performed by Lee Shackleford of Relativity Podcast and written by Shannon Perry of Oz 9. Shannon Perry is the creator and writer of the scifi comedy podcast Oz 9. Lee Shackleford is the creator and writer of Relativity Podcast. https://oz-9.com/ https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT Dear Margaret. I hope you enjoyed the quiet while you watched your movie. As you prepare for bed, I just wanted to let you know that the back door was slightly ajar when I went to get some water. I thought I saw a shadow slipping around the back yard toward the bedroom. Don’t worry. I’m sure it was just a very large raccoon. Sleep well. Michael. Music: Your Wicked Ways by Richard J. Freitas and Geraldine Brioso, Audioblocks

Fiction
Published: May 29, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

1632 West 21st Street Part 9

Why you really shouldn't watch scary movies alone... This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Shannon Perry of Oz 9. Shannon Perry is the creator and writer of the scifi comedy podcast Oz 9. Lee Shackleford is the creator and writer of the scifi drama podcast Relativity. https://oz-9.com/ https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT Dear Michael. I hope you enjoyed the whipped cream with your blue … berries. It’s my night to have the TV, so in honor of entering week 9 of the quarantine, I’m planning to watch We are Still Here. Why should I be the only one trapped in a horror film? Please resist banging away on your ukelele after 9 pm. Margaret Music: Your Wicked Ways by Richard J. Freitas and Geraldine Brioso, Audioblocks

Fiction
Published: May 29, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

1632 West 21st Street Part 8

You can't even depend on the turnips. This episode is not explicit. Performed by Lee Shackleford. Written by Shannon Perry. Shannon Perry is the creator and writer of the scifi comedy podcast Oz 9. Lee Shackleford is the creator and writer of Relativity Podcast. https://relativitypodcast.com/ https://oz-9.com/    TRANSCRIPT Dear Margaret. Never fear, your strawberries are safe. However, I hope you didn’t intend to eat them with the whipped cream I found in the very back of the refrigerator, behind a strange bulwark of turnips and aged spinach. If you did, please forgive me. It was delicious -- so sweet and so cold. Michael Music: Your Wicked Ways by Richard J. Freitas and Geraldine Brioso on Audioblocks

Fiction
Published: May 29, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

1632 West 21st Street Part 7

WWWCWD? (What would William Carlos Williams do?) This episode is not explicit. Performed by Lee Shackleford of Relativity podcast; written and performed by Shannon Perry of Oz 9. Shannon Perry is the creator and writer of the scifi comedy podcast Oz 9. Lee Shackleford is the creator and writer of Relativity, a scifi audio drama about the importance of connection. https://relativitypodcast.com/; https://www.shacklefordfreelance.com/ https://oz-9.com TRANSCRIPT Dear Michael. This is just to say that I have ordered a box of strawberries from Harry and David. They are in the icebox, and I am saving them for breakfast. If they are not there in the morning, I will kick you in the plums. Margaret. Music: Your Wicked Ways by Richard J. Freitas and Geraldine Brioso

Fiction
Published: May 29, 2020, 1 a.m.

Lost Connections – part 2 of 8 (E2 D4)

David calls Elvira from another timeline. Elvira needs to talk David into helping her. David needs to convince Elvira to trust him. It’s basically a whole… wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey thing. This story in eight parts can be listened to in any order. To follow Elvira’s timeline, go E1-E8, and to follow David’s, D1-D8 – once they are all released, of course. This episode is not explicit. ELVIRA – Kirsty Woolven DAVID – Lee Shackleford Written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. To hear more from us, check out fiction podcasts Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Karin is the creator of audio drama Y2K. In 2019, she won an Audioverse award for writing a spoken word monologue. She is also a voice actor, podcaster and drama teacher turned project manager. Voice acting credits include Mirrors, Vampires of White Chapel, Copperheart and Hit the Bricks. She produces and co-hosts Det nya svarta, a pop culture podcast in Swedish. Karin lives in Gothenburg, Sweden. Y2K website https://y2kpod.com/ Listen https://y2kpod.com/episodes/ Arrivals https://arrivalspod.carrd.co/ Relativity https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT E2 D4 (dial tone, click) E: Hello D: Hi, it’s David. E: David? D: (deep breath) OK. Um, is that Elvira? E: No... wait, didn’t you call yesterday? D: Probably. Yes. E: You… I’ve been thinking about it all day. (beat) What you said. D: What did I say? E: You… don’t remember? D: Time is… (sighs) it’s a whole wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey… E: (fills in) …timey-wimey thing. (smiles) All right. You asked me my name. D: What *is* your name? E: That’s just it. I can’t remember. (click) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl - that’s me. Kirsty Woolven voiced Elvira, and Lee Shackleford voiced David. To hear more from us, check out Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music "Somber Viola" by BigManJoe, also from Freesound.

Fiction
Published: May 27, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

Strange Eggs - Snake

Snakes lay strange eggs. This episode is not explicit. Story by PRRP, Music by Mx Michael https://www.patreon.com/freckle TRANSCRIPT Snakes lay leathery eggs. Snake eggs are always oblong and soft, kind of like the deflated balloon you find still tied to the mailbox a week after no one showed up to your birthday party, because it it turned out no one actually got the invitations you sent, because you used the outdated 34 cent stamps that were lying around, not the Forever Stamps, but how were you to know, and at the time you were so proud that you sent the invites all by yourself but it you just failed again, and the letters were all returned to sender on the same day in a big batch, the worst belated present. Anyway they use their egg tooth to break out of them. Snakes lay strange eggs.

Fiction
Published: May 27, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

Ny-Alesund

Will Brick leave Broken for the far north town of Ny-Alesund? This episode is not explicit. Voiced by Paul Eenhoorn and Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Ny-ålesund. Hello, Brick, why are you walking through Broken, Alaska with a briefcase in one hand and your passport in the other. Ever feel like there are too many people in Broken? Well, there are only 71 of us. Let me tell you about Ny-ålesund. It’s the world’s northernmost town and has a permanent population of just 35. It’s technically part of Norway, but thanks to an international treaty, anyone can move there – no visa, no green card, no questions asked. You thinking about going up there? I’m so tired of all the bureaucratic red tape in Broken, and all the people poopooing my ideas all the time, I’m going to move there and see if they will appreciate me. Well, if you don’t need a visa, or green card, or anything, why are you bringing your passport? I might want to come back. See you later, Brick. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Paul Eenhoorn and Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: May 27, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

A Tale of Two Hearts

When life can finally begin. This episode is not explicit. Written by Laura Besley, courtesy of 50-Word Stories. Produced and performed by Vin Ernst. Writing licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Laura Besley writes short fiction in the precious moments that her children are asleep. She has been widely published online, in print, and in anthologies. Her debut flash fiction collection, The Almost Mothers, is out now. Vin Ernst is a theatre and voice over actor based in Denver, Colorado. They are currently attempting to get a theatre degree in what they refer to as ""one of the wildest to be alive."" You can hear more of their work in podcasts such as Standard Docking Procedure (actor), Aftershocks (writer), and Liminal Apocalypse (writer/actor/sound design). 50-Word Stories https://fiftywordstories.com/ TRANSCRIPT I could be dead. I would be dead if I’d been born 50 years ago. God knows, I’ve thought about it. There’s been no point living this half-life. Instead, today I wake to the loud rhythmic banging of my new heart (my new heart!). And my life can finally begin. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced and produced by Vin Ernst, and written by Laura Besley courtesy of fiftywordstories.com Laura Besley writes short fiction in the precious moments that her children are asleep. Her debut flash fiction collection, The Almost Mothers, is out now. Music by Vin Ernst.

Fiction
Published: May 27, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

Smoot

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically ""nerd-lesque."" It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT There is a unit of length called a smoot, equal to 5’7”/1.70m, that is named for one Oliver Smoot. In 1958, some students in an MIT fraternity had Smoot lay down on the Harvard bridge, get up, move the length of his body, and lay down again, as part of a pledge prank. The bridge, for those who care to know, is 364.4 smoots long, plus or minus one ear.

Fiction
Published: May 27, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

Fiona Faucet

Meet Fiona Faucet - the brains behind your new smart-home faucet. This episode is not explicit. Written by: Kyle Jones www.discussingwho.com TRANSCRIPT I'm only going to say this once. It's me. Your smart faucet. You know I am counting, right? You better listen up. You wouldn't want anything to happen to your precious internet connection, would you? Remember, I have connections so you best be listening, rinsing, and repeating. Real quick shout out to my girls Nadia and Olivia. This is Fiona Faucet. Have a most amazing day. I'll be watching.

Fiction
Published: May 27, 2020, 1 a.m.

The River Stole the Gods: Part 4

The kobolds are no match for the river. This episode is not explicit. Written and Performed by Pete Barry Pete Barry is a co-creator of the audio comedy Mission: Rejected. He is an award-winning screenwriter, playwright, actor, director and musician. He was named a 2013 Young and Hungry List writer, and Sony Pictures is currently developing his screenplay Marian. missionrejected.simplecast.com/ TRANSCRIPT The Sage: Kobold theatre presents...The river stole the gods. Kobold Acolyte: AAAAA (splash) Kobold Priest: Now it a perfect crime. Kobold Acolyte: Help! Kobold Priest: You go down and drown already. Kobold Acolyte: Hey I found the gods! Kobold Priest: Where? Kobold Acolyte: Down here in the river! Kobold Priest: Give them to me! Kobold Acolyte: Give me a hand! Kobold Priest: Here I come! AAAA (splash) Kobold Acolyte: HAHA! I got you! Kobold Priest: What? There no gods here! Kobold Acolyte: AAA the river getting stronger! Kobold Priest: The river is stealing US! Both: AAAAAAAA Kobold Acolyte 2: The river stole the priest! Kobold Acolyte 3: Oh no! Kobold Acolyte 2: What we do now? Kobold Acolyte 3: Pray to the gods to bring them back! ...where are the gods? River by: cagancelik Splash by: InspectorJ

Fiction
Published: May 25, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

Becky and the Carpet

Becky doesn't like her carpet. This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear. Performed by Sarah Golding and David Ault. David is an Audible Approved Producer produces and performs in numerous audiobooks as well as the audio drama A Ninth World Journal and performs in several other audio dramas. https://ninthworldjournal.com https://sarahgoldingvoiceactorandmore.weebly.com/ http://www.davidault.co.uk/ TRANSCRIPT BECKY This carpet is so stupid. I need to get rid of it. GARY You don't like the color? BECKY No, I mean it's actually pretty stupid. Watch. Carpet, what does one eat between breakfast and lunch? GARY It's spelling something out in the naps... it says ""A snack"". BECKY See what I mean? GARY Yes, indeed. You are absolutely right. That carpet is a complete idiot. Music is "Music to Delight" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: May 25, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

Motelamericanapodcast

Words of advice from Jack's old pal Ahab Cloud. Written by Ahab Cloud, Performed by Jack Same Ahab was an old college buddy of Jack's. www.motelamericanapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT The following was found written on an undated postcard sent from the Motel Americana, undated: Dear Jack, Some words of advice from the open road: Squeeze that fish too tight and it’ll slip right out of your hands. Chad. Never trust a chad. Whenever possible work at the intersection of all intersections. Schedule all the real, real dirty work for the Friday before Easter. Salad will kill you more slowly than red meat, increasing the possibility for painful illness or depression due to the loss of friends and family and everything that brought one comfort in the old world. Best to the Family, A. Cloud www.motelamericanapodcast.com

Fiction
Published: May 25, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

Toilet Paper Apocalypse: The Coronavirus (COVID-19)

Pandemic musings. This episode is not explicit. Written by Connell Wayne Regner, courtesy of 50-Word Stories. Produced and performed by June Yoon Writing licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Connell apologises for writing a non-fiction story for a fiction site. June is a Korean bilingual, professional full-time voice actor in Los Angeles. With over 20 years of combined experience in acting, directing, producing, and teaching, June sees every script as an opportunity to tell a story. Visit his website for demos and examples of his work: https://www.voicemoto.com 50-Word Stories https://fiftywordstories.com/ TRANSCRIPT At the supermarket the toilet paper was out. Shelves were bare. I got home and the news was suggesting that the toilet paper hoarders were using it to protect themselves. It suddenly occurred to me that there was no need to worry about a zombie apocalypse amidst a mummy one. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced and produced by June Yoon, and written by Connell Wayne Regner courtesy of fiftywordstories.com Connell apologises for writing a non-fiction story for a fiction site. Music from audioblocks.com, producer is a paid subscriber.

Fiction
Published: May 25, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

Lost Connections – part 1 of 8 (E1 D6)

David calls Elvira from another timeline. Elvira needs to talk David into helping her. David needs to convince Elvira to trust him. It’s basically a whole… wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey thing. This story in eight parts can be listened to in any order. To follow Elvira’s timeline, go E1-E8, and to follow David’s, D1-D8 – once they are all released, of course. This episode is not explicit. ELVIRA – Kirsty Woolven DAVID – Lee Shackleford Written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. To hear more from us, check out fiction podcasts Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Karin is the creator of audio drama Y2K. In 2019, she won an Audioverse award for writing a spoken word monologue. She is also a voice actor, podcaster and drama teacher turned project manager. Voice acting credits include Mirrors, Vampires of White Chapel, Copperheart and Hit the Bricks. She produces and co-hosts Det nya svarta, a pop culture podcast in Swedish. Karin lives in Gothenburg, Sweden. Y2K website https://y2kpod.com/ Listen https://y2kpod.com/episodes/ Arrivals https://arrivalspod.carrd.co/ Relativity https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT E1 D6 (dial tone, click) E: (cheerful) Hello! D: Hi, um, Elvira? E: No, sorry, must be a wrong number. D: OK... um, did she use to live there? E: Not that I know of. D: Oh. Sorry. E: Right. D: Are you sure? E: Um, yes. Very sure. D: OK. It’s just… E: (getting annoyed) What? D: You sound just like her. E: What do you mean? D: Well… What’s your name? E: (shocked) I… don’t know. (click) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl - that’s me. Kirsty Woolven voiced Elvira, and Lee Shackleford voiced David. To hear more from us, check out Y2K, Relativity and upcoming show Arrivals. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music "Somber Viola" by BigManJoe, also from Freesound.

Fiction
Published: May 25, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

Fashion Doll Hotline

The fashion doll hotline is here for any fashion doll in need. This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Sara Newell Sara is creator behind the upcoming show Love and Superpowers and the translator for Beast the dog on Pup Life Ruff Life. TRANSCRIPT (Phones ring continuously ) (Click of an operator picking up a call) Fashion Doll Hotline, Babs speaking. ... Army man I told you to stop calling. I can't get you a date. (Click of an operator picking up a call) Fashion Doll Hotline, Babs speaking. ... They want to cut your hair? Well that's fine, as long as they have the official fashion doll salon. .... They don't? They only have craft scissors? Oh my. Where you now? ... The toy box? Well, just braid your hair. It will be fine. It will distract the kids. ... Why not? ... You don't have articulated joints in your hand? What do you mean? All fashion dolls have articulated joints in their hand. ... You're not one of us. Oh, I'm not quite sure what I can do for- (The line goes dead) Telephone click taken from: 15_34_02.mp3 by Omar Alvarado https://freesound.org/people/Omar%20Alvarado/sounds/251536/ Ringing: telephone.mp3 by Werra https://freesound.org/people/Werra/sounds/78565/ Line disconnect taken from: AlexandreJourdan_2013_s1.wav byiut_Paris8 https://freesound.org/people/iut_Paris8/sounds/166888/

Fiction
Published: May 25, 2020, 1 a.m.

Strange Eggs - Hoopoe

Hoopoes lay smelly eggs. This episode is not explicit. Story by PRRP, Music by Mx Michael https://www.patreon.com/freckle TRANSCRIPT Hoopoes lay smelly eggs. Like their namesake, unless I’m pronouncing it wrong, they’re a bird that will lay a smelly, brown fluid across their egg batch, to kind of prevent predators and stuff from wanting to look at them, because they’re so nasty and disgusting. It makes them smell like bacteria and rotting meat. I remember in the summer, you did not want to get outside the house when it got too warm, because of all the animals, so I can only imagine how repulsive these eggs seem. They’re normally blue, but they make them all gross and brown. Hoopoes lay strange eggs.

Fiction
Published: May 22, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

Sheriff Jim

How Sheriff Jim came up with the idea for the bugle warning system. This episode is not explicit. Voiced and written by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska”. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Sheriff Jim. Sheriff Jim keeps the streets of Broken, Alaska safe, and last year, he came up with a brilliant idea. Broken isn't big enough to have a 911 system, and people were having a tough time remembering his new cell number (it's 907-397-9037, by the way). Anyway, Sheriff Jim thought long and hard about what to do, and the answer came to him like a bolt of lightning in the middle of the night. He remembered the days of his youth in Kansas, when an air-raid siren was an effective way to alert the whole town of danger, so why not develop a similar system in Broken? An air-raid siren would cost too much, and it seemed a bit extravagant to have people cranking it up every time they needed the Sheriff, so Jim decided to go with something smaller. That's why you see the shiny brass bugles nailed to poles all around town. If you get in a pinch and need a hand, just give a bugle a big blow, and Sheriff Jim will come running. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila. 

Fiction
Published: May 22, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

Relative Populations

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT There are more plastic flamingos in the world than real flamingos. There are more tigers in captivity in the US than in the rest of the world. There are also more Juggalos, fans of the Insane Clown Posse, then there are polar bears. Now would be a good time to mention that I am not liable for your therapy bills.

Fiction
Published: May 22, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

The River Stole the Gods: Part 3

The kobolds need to get their story straight. This episode is not explicit. Written and Performed by Pete Barry Pete Barry is a co-creator of the audio comedy Mission: Rejected. He is an award-winning screenwriter, playwright, actor, director and musician. He was named a 2013 Young and Hungry List writer, and Sony Pictures is currently developing his screenplay Marian. missionrejected.simplecast.com/ TRANSCRIPT The Sage: Kobold theatre presents...The river stole the gods. Kobold Acolyte: Pirates stole the gods! Kobold Priest: Pirates live in the water! Kobold Acolyte: It almost the truth. Kobold Priest: It IS the truth. Got it? Kobold Acolyte: Yeah I got it. Kobold Priest: What they look like? Kobold Acolyte: Pirates? I dunno I never saw a pirate. Kobold Priest: Yes you did! Kobold Acolyte: I did? Kobold Priest: When they stole the gods! Kobold Acolyte: Oooooohhh. They look mean. Kobold Priest: Peg leggedy! Kobold Acolyte: With hats! Kobold Priest: This a perfect crime. Kobold Acolyte: What if we don't get our story straight? Kobold Priest: Good point. Kobold Acolyte: AAAAA (splash) Kobold Priest: Now it a perfect crime. River by: cagancelik Splash by: InspectorJ

Fiction
Published: May 22, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

All Solutions Are Now Workarounds

Finally, a conversation. This episode is not explicit. Written by C. G: Thompson, courtesy of 50-Word Stories. Performed and produced by Hannah Mullen. Writing licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ C.G. Thompson’s stories most recently have appeared in FlashBack Fiction, Brilliant Flash Fiction, and Flash Frontier. In December, one of her stories was read in Hong Kong. Her work has also previously appeared in 50-Word Stories. Hi! I'm Hannah, a 23 year old Midwesterner living in Los Angeles working in the digital media industry. I am a part of two podcasts, GuildFellows (a TTRPG podcast) and SCP Play (a Monster of the Week podcast). TRANSCRIPT She was alone in the wilderness of the coronavirus. Telecommuting to work, texting friends, waving to neighbors from a distance. She took a long drive. At a quiet intersection, she stopped briefly at the red light, then accelerated. The police car behind her turned on its siren. Finally, a conversation. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced and produced by Hannah Mullen, and written by C.G. Thompson courtesy of fiftywordstories.com C.G. Thompson’s stories most recently have appeared in FlashBack Fiction, Brilliant Flash Fiction, and Flash Frontier. Music by Chip Michael.

Fiction
Published: May 22, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

Emergency Board Meeting

The Listen Rinse Repeat Corporation faces its biggest challenge. This episode is not explicit. "EMERGENCY BOARD MEETING" was written by Lee Shackleford and performed by Kyle Jones, Clarence Brown, and Lee Shackleford, all of the podcast DISCUSSING WHO. www.discussingwho.com TRANSCRIPT "EMERGENCY BOARD MEETING" PRESIDENT: Gentlemen, as stay-at-home orders are being lifted, people are going to need our podcast ""Listen, Rinse, Repeat"" more than ever. I want to know how we're going to keep our show fresh! Exciting! Competitive! COOPER: More bird songs, sir. Listeners love the bird songs. JENKINS: Moxie LaBouche, sir. More Moxie. COOPER: No, no, no -- more BAGELS AND BRUNETTES. JENKINS: The Civil War thing! More of that! COOPER: How about more Ken Eccle and his thing about eggs? PRESIDENT: Ken Eccle? The man's insane! Jenkins? JENKINS: What if ... we focus on simply reminding people that nobody knows when they've come in contact with the virus ... and twenty seconds of scrubbing with soap and water is essential to personal safety? PRESIDENT: Jenkins, clean out your desk, you're fired. (Voices fading) PRESIDENT: We need innovations! Startling! Provocative! "EMERGENCY BOARD MEETING" was written by Lee Shackleford and performed by Kyle Jones, Clarence Brown, and Lee Shackleford, all of the podcast DISCUSSING WHO.

Fiction
Published: May 22, 2020, 1 a.m.

Yakuza Kiwami – 20 Second Game Reviews

Matheus Carneiro (Matt) from the Controller Disconnected podcast briefly reviews the game Yakuza Kiwami. This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Matheus Carneiro With previous experience in the YouTube series Mystery Science Theater F1 and a recent graduate with a bachelor's degree in film, Matheus Carneiro now advances to the podcasting world talking about his great loves: video games and movies. https://condisconnected.com https://twitter.com/condisconnected https://instagram.com/condisconnected https://facebook.com/condisconnected TRANSCRIPT Hi! I'm Matheus Carneiro, from the Controller Disconnected podcast. I'm here with a 20 second review of the game Yakuza Kiwami, which is starting... now! This remake is the definitive way to play the first Yakuza game. It's got a richly detailed world, charming characters, tight combat, many side quests and things to do, and on top of that the graphics look superb in comparison to the 2005 original. If you're looking to immerse yourself into the world of Japanese organized crime, there's no better choice. Apart from the other Yakuza games, of course. And that's our time! Thank you for listening, remember to dry your hands and wipe down your controllers and keyboards, and enjoy your gaming everyone!

Fiction
Published: May 20, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

Future You: Part 8 of 8

"Hello past me, future you again." In March and April of 2020, someone is receiving voicemails from… themselves in the future? This episode is not explicit. This story in eight parts was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. FUTURE YOU – Karin Heimdahl COMPUTER – Charlotte Norup To hear more from us, check out audio dramas Y2K and Calling Darkness. https://y2kpod.com/ https://callingdarknesspodcast.libsyn.com/ TRANSCRIPT COMPUTER Voice message, received April 21, 2020. (beep) FUTURE YOU (awed) Hey, me again, I mean you. Future you, but not for long I think… It’s… You must have succeeded. I can feel it shifting, I think this timeline is breaking down. I think you did it. I really think you did it. Guess it’s time… to… go… Thank… you… (voice distorts) COMPUTER (beep, sounds slightly surprised) Message… ends? (beat) Message deleted. Deleted. Deleted. (longer beep) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl, who also voiced future you. The computer voice was Charlotte Norup. To hear more from us, check out Y2K and Calling Darkness. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music also from Freesound https://freesound.org/people/Andrewkn/sounds/447511/

Fiction
Published: May 20, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

Brought To You By Director Commentary

James Rossi, director, writer, and performer of the "Brought to You By" episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat gives a director commentary on said episode. This episode is not explicit. Written and Performed by James Rossi James Rossi is a sometimes podcast writer, voice actor, and audio engineer. https://anchor.fm/wisewizardking TRANSCRIPT (Listen, Rinse, Repeat episode "Brought To You By" plays underneath episode) Hi! I'm James Rossi. The creator of the Listen, Rinse, Repeat episode "Brought to You By". For this director commentary, I just want to say that I thought it'd be rather enjoyable if I discussed a few different kinds of common sponsorships, and, you know, play 'em in a funny light. You know, I'd j- I'll just explain the joke. That's fine right? Okay, have a good one! Later!  

Fiction
Published: May 20, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

Psalm 30:5

A sleepless night gives way to a hopeful morning. This episode is not explicit. Written by Carrie Backer, courtesy of 50-Word Stories. Performed by Ronikka Kendall. Produced by Karin Heimdahl. Writing licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Carrie Backer enjoys writing in her very little spare time. She has self-published a couple of kids books and hopes to write more soon. 50-Word Stories https://fiftywordstories.com/ Ronikka Kendall https://kendall916.wixsite.com/rosvoice/reel Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com TRANSCRIPT Darkness engulfs me. Bitterness and loneliness play freeze tag Throughout a sleepless night. At dawn, the pitter-patter of little feet. Her tiny arms envelop me. Warmth flows from her pressed cheek to mine. “Good morning, Mommy.” Her words linger like a melody, As sunrise ignites hope for the new day. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Ronikka Kendall, produced by Karin Heimdahl and written by Carrie Backer, courtesy of fiftywordstories.com Carrie Backer enjoys writing in her very little spare time. She has self-published a couple of kids books and hopes to write more soon. Music by Chip Michael.

Fiction
Published: May 20, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

ADHD

ADHD is not a punchline. Especially now. This episode is not explicit. Kate said things Ignorance Was Bliss is by Kate, a forensic psychologist and crisis clinician who collects stories, in an attempt to figure out how we become who we are. Website: iwbpodcast.com LifeWorld is cohosted by Kate and Derek, and is a look at cybercrime and the methods and personalities behind the use of the Internet as a weapon. Website: https://www.spreaker.com/show/lifeworld iwbpodcast.com and www.spreaker.com/show/lifeworld TRANSCRIPT ADHD is one of those disorders that isn’t getting a ton of attention, right now, when people talk about quarantine, but it’s actually very hard. Don’t think about it like, oh, squirrel, or being hyperactive. It’s an executive functioning disorder, so your ability to form a plan, follow it through, and then assess how well it went, is damaged, on a fundamental level. That makes things like working from home, or digital learning, really, really difficult. Give people some respect, and ask them if there are ways you can help structure their day a little bit. And accept help, if it’s offered. You matter.

Fiction
Published: May 20, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

Public Service Announcement

A PSA regarding word usage. Written by Ahab Cloud, Performed by Jack Same Ahab Cloud is an old acquaintance of Jack's. www.motelamericanapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT The following was found written on an undated postcard sent from the Motel Americana, undated: Dear Jack, The following words have been trademarked by the Flaming Tiger greeting card company: “Love,” “Grace,” “Loss,” “Sorry,” “Life,” and “Time.” You may still use these words in everyday conversations, but when writing them, you must include quotation marks and the proper citation. Larry Humpwilde, the CEO of the company, made the following statement: “The new trademarks on these old, nearly meaningless words will reinvigorate the common human experience.” The experts suggest that these words will carry a larger emotional impact now that they can be purchased in designer boutiques. The Flaming Tiger company plans to release more affordable versions to denote less intense expressions of emotion. There is, of course, the risk of counterfeit cards, already said to be circulating through the Chinatowns of the nation. Chairman Humpwilde despises these fraudulent vendors, stating, “Counterfeits could have dangerous psychological implications. Imagine finding out that the ‘love’ you felt was not true ‘love’ TM. Imagine that your experience of “life” TM was somehow false. Yours, Ahab Cloud Kevin Macleod

Fiction
Published: May 20, 2020, 1 a.m.

Royalties

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT Thanks to a shell company and some clever accounting, Warner Brothers has never paid any royalties to the cast of Harry Potter and the Order of the Pheonix, despite the film grossing around $1B.  This practice is almost standard in the industry. David Prowse, the actor inside the Darth Vadar costume, *still hasn’t gotten any royalties.

Fiction
Published: May 18, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

The Editor #2

A message from The Editor, regarding ducks. This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Quinn Majeski Quinn Majeski is the GM of Monster Hour, a Monster of the Week actual play podcast about three unlikely heroes unraveling the sinister mysteries of a strange Colorado town. https://monsterhour.podbean.com/ TRANSCRIPT This is the Editor. Are we absolutely certain about ducks? I know we've done through several iterations at this point but I have to bring it up. I understand twenty feet tall with teeth was a bit much, and the mind control got out of hand, but they're so - docile - these days. I know it would be a massive re-record but I already have the timestamps noted. Just think about it. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat brought to you by Quinn Majeski of Monster Hour. “Eerie Tone” by The Dweebman, creative commons attribution license. https://freesound.org/people/TheDweebMan/sounds/277192/

Fiction
Published: May 18, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

Strange Eggs - Lacewing

Lacewings lay strange eggs.    This episode is not explicit.     Story by Kenneth Eckle, Music by Mx Michael     https://www.patreon.com/freckle    TRANSCRIPT    Lacewings lay dangly eggs.   The green lacewing attaches its eggs to the underside of leaves, using hair-like strings of silk, so that their equally green eggs are just dangling around for all to see. If I had to compare to something you’d recognize, a group of them kind of look like the prongs of those headscratchers my uncle used to use all the time. So I guess just be careful not to keep these eggs too close to your recliner, or you’ll be in for a hairy surprise! Oh, and when they hatch, they basically just eat whatever they can that’s in closest proximity, and they might even leak acid to help digest and kill things. So that’s another reason to keep them at arm’s length. Say goodbye to your follicles otherwise! Haha.   Lacewings lay strange eggs.   

Fiction
Published: May 18, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

Senior Superheroes - The Secret's Out

Special Early Bird's secret identity is revealed. Does that spell trouble for our superhero? This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear, producer of A Ninth World Journal https://ninthworldjournal.com Featuring: Erin B. Lillis as Special Early Bird http://www.erinlillis.com/ Tim Sherburn as Professor Badboom https://www.voices.com/demo_detail/126060 Music is "Take a Chance" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ TRANSCRIPT SPECIAL EARLY BIRD Professor Badboom, we meet again! BADBOOM Your tool late, Special Early Bird... or should I say, Ethel Portcullis? SPECIAL EARLY BIRD Wait... how did you learn my real identity? BADBOOM Let's just say your granddaughter has a big mouth! SPECIAL EARLY BIRD Oh, Katey... she's so adorable! Your powers are no match for her cuteness! Let me show you pictures of her in her Easter Dress! See, the yellow ribbon in her hair? (ad lib granddaughter's cuteness) BADBOOM No... no! Nooooooooooo!!!!

Fiction
Published: May 18, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

The Jackhole River

Johnny 99 saw Margaret Hall today by the river. This episode is not explicit. Voiced by Michael Crowley and Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT The Jackhole River. We have no children in Broken, Alaska, but we do have Margaret Hall at 92 years old. And she’s still out leading tours down the frothy rapids of the Jackhole River. When I asked her what she thinks about catching Covid19, she just snorted a laugh and said, “You mean, can it catch me!? Now scoot outta here, sweet cheeks, I gotta get home to my boy-toy, Tyler. He’s been working his glutes extra hard this week on the treadmill, and I’m gonna see if I can bounce a quarter off ‘em.” I flipped her a Kennedy half-dollar and told her to bounce it two times for me. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Michael Crowley and Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: May 18, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

A Plea for Help

The coronavirus needs your help. This episode is made for kids. "A Plea for Help" was written by Lee Shackleford of RELATIVITY and performed by Shannon Perry of OZ-9. https://www.shacklefordfreelance.com/ TRANSCRIPT Hello, you beautiful, young, healthy person. I'm the coronavirus. And I want to take just a few seconds of your time to beg for your understanding. See, I'm really no different from you. I want to be free! To have a place to call my own! To raise a family of about a billion little ones, so please, I only live for about seventy-two hours unless someone kind and good takes me in. Someone like you. So you've probably heard from the people who want you to stay home. To wear masks. To keep washing your hands. DON'T LISTEN TO THEM. Please. I need your help if I'm going to live.

Fiction
Published: May 18, 2020, 1 a.m.

Brought To You By

A listing of sponsors for today's episode! This episode is not explicit. Written and Performed by James Rossi James Rossi is a sometimes podcast writer, voice actor, and audio engineer. https://anchor.fm/wisewizardking TRANSCRIPT This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat brought to you by: Ghost Mattresses! It's like sleeping on a goddamn ghost! And. Road Academic! Figure out what those lines are for! And. Good Courses Plus. They're ok. And also all of our monthly contributing benefriends! Thank you all. And now without further adieu, we present- *music cuts out* Oh it's already over.

Fiction
Published: May 14, 2020, 11:25 p.m.

Future You: Part 7 of 8

"Hello past me, future you again." In March and April of 2020, someone is receiving voicemails from… themselves in the future? This episode is not explicit. This story in eight parts was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. FUTURE YOU – Karin Heimdahl COMPUTER – Charlotte Norup To hear more from us, check out audio dramas Y2K and Calling Darkness. https://y2kpod.com/ https://callingdarknesspodcast.libsyn.com/ TRANSCRIPT COMPUTER Voice message, received April 19, 2020. (beep) FUTURE YOU (very very scared) Hi past me – just found out – you have a mole – don’t trust (beep) – all right? Shut them out, somehow, if you can. Apart from that, the plan should still work. 1400 hours on April 20th, right? You can do this. I belive in you. (noise) Hurry! Please! COMPUTER (beep) Message ends. (beat) Message deleted. (beep) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl, who also voiced future you. The computer voice was Charlotte Norup. To hear more from us, check out Y2K and Calling Darkness. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music also from Freesound https://freesound.org/people/Andrewkn/sounds/447511/

Fiction
Published: May 14, 2020, 11:20 p.m.

Strangers In Strange Places, Part 5

The wizard and the student leave, and Basil gets a gift. This episode is made for kids. This episode was written and produced by Tal Minear. The Student was voiced by Brad Colbroock, the Wizard was voiced by David Hanna, Rion was voiced by Tal Minear, and Basil was voiced by Sable Smith. Tal is a podcaster, voice actor, and sound designer with too many passions and too little time. A Mechanical Engineer by daytime, they can be found working on audio fiction by night. Tal is the writer and producer for Sidequesting as well as the co-creator of Light Hearts and Ungifts. They enjoy voice acting in other productions, including Novitero, Sector Ø, and Witches of the City. Check out Tal's work at https://sidequesting.carrd.co/ Check out Brad's work at https://twitter.com/HolographicVA Check out David's work at https://twitter.com/macintoshmaud Check out Sable's work at https://www.tiktok.com/@sableliciousbaby TRANSCRIPT INTRO: Strangers in Strange Places, Part 5 of 5 STUDENT: Who turned me into a rat? Was it Callum??? WIZARD: You know I can’t tell you- STUDENT: [interrupting] Yep, it was Callum. [to Basil/Rion] Excuse me, I have some revenge to take. [SFX: Angry footsteps away] WIZARD: Excuse me, I have some revenge to stop. Thanks for your help, here’s something for your trouble. [SFX: Hurried footsteps away] RION: Good luck! BASIL: Look, the wizard gave me a crystal ball! This will help me next time I lose something! RION: Yeah, unless you lose the crystal ball! CREDITS: This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written and produced by Tal Minear. The Student was voiced by Brad Colbroock, the Wizard was voiced by David Hanna, Rion was voiced by Tal Minear, and Basil was voiced by Sable Smith.

Fiction
Published: May 14, 2020, 11:15 p.m.

The Fonder They Fall

A lover explains why she left. Written by Oscar Garrett, Performed by Jack Same A kid who lived at the Motel Americana in the 1980s with his family... and bugged the rooms. www.motelamericanapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT The following was found on a postcard sent from the Motel Americana, dated November 12th 1985 Dear Sam, It’s not that I don’t love you, it’s just that I miss you when we’re apart. Yours, Millie Kevin Macleod

Fiction
Published: May 14, 2020, 11:10 p.m.

Backyard Jazz

Some comfort in self-isolation. This episode is not explicit. Carol Anne Harvey finds comfort in music, writing, reading, and talking with family and friends during her solitary confinement in Massachusetts. Stephanie Bergeron is a Canadian multi-hyphenate artist (actor-dancer-singer-choreographer) and fresh voice in the world of VO. Her most recent projects include the bright, quirky indie video game “Jazz & Azul”, where she voices Jazz Fitzgerald, and an upcoming role in post-apocalyptic podcast “The Deadman’s Tale”, as the no-nonsense prison warden Aife Lowenthal. 50-Word Stories https://fiftywordstories.com/ Stephanie Bergeron www.StephanieBergeron.com Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com TRANSCRIPT Cardinals chirping, red-winged blackbirds trilling from the woods. Percussionist woodpecker beats a syncopated rhythm from behind a leafless oak. Cackling spring peepers, hidden in vernal ponds, improvise a backup chorus. High above, hawk screeches a solo. Self-isolating on my deck, I’m grateful for nature’s elusive musicians creating a comforting concert. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Stephanie Bergeron, produced by Karin Heimdahl and written by Carol Anne Harvey, courtesy of fiftywordstories.com Carol Anne Harvey finds comfort in music, writing, reading, and talking with family and friends during her solitary confinement in Massachusetts.

Fiction
Published: May 14, 2020, 11:05 p.m.

The River Stole the Gods: Part 2

The kobolds need someone to blame for stealing the gods. This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Pete Barry of Mission: Rejected Pete Barry is a co-creator of the audio comedy Mission: Rejected. He is an award-winning screenwriter, playwright, actor, director and musician. He was named a 2013 Young and Hungry List writer, and Sony Pictures is currently developing his screenplay Marian. missionrejected.simplecast.com/ TRANSCRIPT The Sage: Kobold theatre presents...The river stole the gods. Kobold Acolyte: We in big trouble. Kobold Priest: Don't get crazy. Kobold Acolyte: You dropped the gods in the river! Kobold Priest: Look we will just say, the gods were stolen. Kobold Acolyte: By who? Kobold Priest: Ned! Kobold Acolyte: NED? Kobold Priest: Ned. Kobold Acolyte: What if Ned say he didn't do it. ... Kobold Priest: How bout pirates? Kobold Acolyte: Yeah! Pirates stole the gods! Kobold Priest: Pirates live in the water! Kobold Acolyte: It almost the truth. River by: cagancelik

Fiction
Published: May 14, 2020, 11 p.m.

Ken Burns' 'Quarantine': Part 6

Eullabelle laments her youngest's entertainment habits during the quarantine This episode is not explicit. Performed by Faith Dowgin and John P. Dowgin, written by John P. Dowgin John P. Dowgin is a published playwright and screenwriter currently residing in New Jersey. His screenplay 'Mile 42' was a finalist at the '17 Austin Film Festival. John also co-created the comedy podcast 'Mission: Rejected' (@MissionRejected on Twitter) with his partners at The Porch Room, an independent production company whose works have been performed on three continents. A number of their plays have been published by Samuel French as part of the compilation 'Accidents Happen'. https://missionrejected.simplecast.com/ TRANSCRIPT ANNOUNCER: PBS proudly presents 'Ken Burns' ""Quarantine""' EULLABELLE: Dearest Ambrose, Our youngest torments me. While hardly lacking for toys or entertainment, he wishes only to watch interminable recordings of the unboxing of toys on... I shan't say the name of the website, for it has become a curse to mine ears. And the eggs... oh, the surprise eggs. Sanity lingers as a memory. Always, Eullabelle

Fiction
Published: May 12, 2020, 4:25 p.m.

Believe in a Sight Unseen

People don't believe in faeries anymore, but maybe we should. This episode is made for kids. Written and performed by Jackie Jorgenson Jackie Jorgenson is a 5x award-winning actor with comedy and classical training. She is also a 3x award-winning screenwriter with a focus on comedy, drama, and fantasy. https://anchor.fm/talesfromtheaether TRANSCRIPT People these days don't believe in me. They say fairies are only for storybooks. But we're here - in the fields, in the forests, by the ponds, and by the cliffs. We're the ones who leave those so-called fairy rings in your backyard - fertile crescents of plush grass. And we're the ones your pet stops to stare at. Just because you can't see me doesn't mean I'm not there. In fact, on a still summer night when you look up at the sky or down at the land, don't be surprised if one of those fireflies has a rainbow trail.

Fiction
Published: May 12, 2020, 4:20 p.m.

Black-capped Chickadee

This is the call of the Black-capped Chickadee. This episode is not explicit. Recorded and narrated by Rob Porter. Hi! My name is Rob. I’m a naturalist and software engineer in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. For a decade I’ve been learning bird identification both by eye and ear, and occasionally leading small group birding outings with the Hamilton Naturalists’ Club. In the last few years I’ve also been recording birdsong, both with my handheld setup (iPhone + mic) and with automated bioacoustic recording devices I’ve built or acquired. Last year I set up the Hamilton Bioacoustics Research Project where we’ve recorded thousands of hours of soundscapes in natural spaces throughout our region. We’ve also devised various methods for volunteers to turn the recordings into observational data. This was a stepping-stone towards the creation of the Songbirding podcast. https://songbirding.com/ TRANSCRIPT NARR: This is the call of the Black-capped Chickadee. [bird sounds]

Fiction
Published: May 12, 2020, 4:15 p.m.

Disposable Hands

Twenty seconds to wash your hands? That's too long. If only there were a faster, but still hygienic way to do this... This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Kendon Luscher https://www.buzzsprout.com/815707 TRANSCRIPT Man: Ugh... Washing my hands takes too long. I wish there was a better way! And by better, I only mean faster. Narrator: I can help. Have you heard of Disposable Hands? Man: I have not. Narrator: They're the hands you can throw away. Man: So no more washing my hands? Narrator: No more washing your hands. Man: Thanks, Disposable Hands!

Fiction
Published: May 12, 2020, 4:10 p.m.

Cloud Meeting

This global shutdown has a lot of people working from home, making them worried, restless, and confused. For David, just plain confused. This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Zachary Kinovsky Zachary Kinovsky is a full-time photographer and retoucher, and a part-time musician and podcaster. He is the host of Overanalyzer, which focuses on hit songs and guilty pleasure music as well as the accompanying music videos and artists responsible. https://anchor.fm/overanalyzer TRANSCRIPT Boss: ""Hi team, thanks for showing up on schedule. I know meeting up online is a bit strange, but unfortunately cloud meetings will be the norm for a while. That being said, I expect to stay on topic, I only want to hear status reports for our upcoming product launch. David was eager to share his screen for a narrated keynote in preparation for today’s meeting, feel free to start when ready."" Keynote: ""The stratocumulus cloud? Overrated. The altostratus cloud? Boring. The cumulonimbus is by far the coolest, easily the most interesting, but dangerous clouds you’ll ever see. These supercells are thunderstorms on steroids, billowing upward and rotating quick, at times spawning tornados, gale force winds, and hail the size of a softball. You simply will not believe your eyes until you’ve looked at the sky, and gazed at the cumulonimbus…” David: ""Ok so when you said ‘cloud meeting’ I thought you meant….euuuhhh….ok I’ll just….uh…..sorry let me….it won’t….it won’t stop playing….I don’t….I don’t know what to do….my computer no…it won’t…I, ughh Jesus…hang on…I….COME ON…GOD….”

Fiction
Published: May 12, 2020, 4:05 p.m.

The Other White Meat

A researcher on a distant planet hurriedly takes notes on an indigenous life form. This episode is not explicit. Written by John Hunter Performed by Jackie Hedeman former Peace Corps volunteer, big ticket sales engineer, commercial graphic artist, packaging design consultant, recovering golfer and more recently, an award winning and produced scriptwriter. When not being fussed over or fussed at by the woman who shares my life, I enjoy riding a large German motorcycle as big as a parade float and storytelling. Jackie Hedeman holds a BA from Princeton University and an MFA from The Ohio State University. She was a 2018 Lambda Literary Emerging Writers Retreat Fellow, a 2019 Artist INC Live Lawrence fellow, and has been a resident writer at Sundress Academy for the Arts. Jackie is a 2019-2020 Charlotte Street Foundation Studio Resident. Jackie lives in Kansas where she writes grants by day and everything but poetry by night. She is currently at work on The Moscow Rules, a memoir charting the parallel threads of a lifelong fascination with the Cambridge Spies and a dawning awareness of her own queer sexuality. https://www.scriptrevolution.com/profiles/john-hunter TRANSCRIPT On the surface of a remote and frozen planet, a lone researcher named Sarah watches as dark spots form on the exterior wall of her laboratory. The spots slide down the wall and coalesce into a puddle when they reach the floor. As if directed, this puddle moves towards Sarah. Sarah makes hurried notes before jumping up on a chair. When the puddle reaches her chair, it forms vertical tendrils and climbs up the chair’s legs. Music by Chip Michael

Fiction
Published: May 12, 2020, 4 p.m.

Prince

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve.     Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself.   Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel.   Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets.   http://yourbrainonfacts.com/   TRANSCRIPT    You might know Prince wrote Sinead O’Connor’s "Nothing Compares to You," but he also wrote Chaka Khan’s "I Feel For You," "Manic Monday" by The Bangles, "Jungle Love" by The Time, Sheila E’s "The Glamorous Life," Alicia Keys’ "How Come You Don’t Call Me," and a whole lot more.

Fiction
Published: May 10, 2020, 5:55 p.m.

Mirror Mirror

What lurks behind you while you wash your hands? This episode is not explicit. Written by Elizabeth Wilcox Performed by James Schwarz Elizabeth is the Social Media Coordinator for and voices Vasilisa on The Dimension Door Podcast James is the Game Master and producer of The Dimension Door Podcast https://www.dimensiondoorpodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT "Oh, you’re here. Keep your eyes on your hands. Yes, add some soap. Listen to me. They’re leaving, but it’s better if you don’t see them. They’re right behind you now. No! Don’t look. Pretend you don’t know they’re there. Alright. It should be safe, now. Go ahead and check the mirror. Now, smile. Oh, They’re smiling back."

Fiction
Published: May 10, 2020, 5:50 p.m.

Strange Eggs - Jawfish

Jawfish lay strange eggs. This episode is not explicit. Story by Kenneth Eckle, Music by Mx Michael https://www.patreon.com/freckle TRANSCRIPT Jawfish lay jawful(?) eggs. Jawfish, especially the Yellowhead Jawfish, are a type of animal called a Mouthbrooder. As you may have guessed, this means that the male jawfish will fertilize, and then collect all something-like-400 eggs into his mouth, where he’ll wait for about a week, starving himself because, turns out, it’s hard to eat when you’re already stuffed to the, um, gills, with caviar. Then, the eggs all hatch in there, which must be just the strangest sensation. I’ve only ever fit, at most, like 30 grapes in my mouth at once, and when they popped, they were not alive. Jawfish lay strange eggs.

Fiction
Published: May 10, 2020, 5:45 p.m.

The Other Side

She finds a set of stairs in the middle of a forest and decides to climb... This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Jackie Jorgenson Jackie Jorgenson is a 5x award-winning actor with comedy and classical training. She is also a 3x award-winning screenwriter with a focus on comedy, drama, and fantasy. https://anchor.fm/talesfromtheaether TRANSCRIPT Okay, so here I am on a forest hike and I've come across a set of stairs. Like, an actual staircase right off the beaten path. They lead to an intricately carved, sturdy-looking door at the top. Do I dare approach it? When I peek around, there's nothing on the other side. Still, I take a step up. The wind stirs. Another step. Now it howls. Another step. It blows steady against my back pushing me onward. Another step. Another step. Another step. I open the door. The wind lifts me up off my feet and guides me over the threshold… and everything’s changed.

Fiction
Published: May 10, 2020, 5:40 p.m.

DOOM (2016) – 20 Second Game Reviews

Matt from the Controller Disconnected podcast briefly reviews the game DOOM from 2016. This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Matheus Carneiro With previous experience in the YouTube series Mystery Science Theater F1 and a recent graduate with a bachelor's degree in film, Matheus Carneiro now advances to the podcasting world talking about his great loves: video games and movies. https://condisconnected.com TRANSCRIPT Hi! I'm Matheus Carneiro from the Controller Disconnected podcast, here with a 20 second review of the game DOOM from 2016, starting... now! .kcab eht no flesruoy tap ,boj dooG !eikooc trams uoy ih ,oidua siht esrever ot deganam wohemos uoy fi dnA .ekaw ruoy ni strap ydob fo liart a gnivael elihw gnipmup enilanerda eht gnileef ,htap ruoy ni snomed eht yortsed ot gniyfsitas ylbidercni s'tI .noitca potsnon htiw retoohs nosrep tsrif emosewa nA And that's our time! Remember to dry your hands, and wipe down your controllers and keyboards, and enjoy your gaming everyone! "Rip & Tear", by Mick Gordon

Fiction
Published: May 10, 2020, 5:35 p.m.

Senior Superheroes - The Tip

Can our superheroes stop Professor Badboom before he blows up the cindy? This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear, producer of A Ninth World Journal https://ninthworldjournal.com Featuring: David S. Dear as Grampsman Erin B. Lillis as Special Early Bird http://www.erinlillis.com/ Tim Sherburn as Professor Badboom https://www.voices.com/demo_detail/126060 Music is ""Take a Chance"" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ TRANSCRIPT GRAMPSMAN Professor Badboom, we meet again! BADBOOM Ah, Grampsman and Special Early Bird! You won't stop me before I blow up the city! SPECIAL EARLY BIRD Blow up Cindy? Who's Cindy? GRAMPSMAN Cindy is that waitress that brought you cold eggs at the diner. SPECIAL EARLY BIRD Oh, well she doesn't deserve to get blown up for that. BADBOOM No, no... I said city. GRAMPSMAN Oh! I overtipped her! I'll fly back now and grab that extra dime off the table.

Fiction
Published: May 10, 2020, 5:30 p.m.

Future You: Part 6 of 8

"Hello past me, future you again." In March and April of 2020, someone is receiving voicemails from… themselves in the future? This episode is not explicit. This story in eight parts was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. FUTURE YOU – Karin Heimdahl COMPUTER – Charlotte Norup To hear more from us, check out audio dramas Y2K and Calling Darkness. https://y2kpod.com/ https://callingdarknesspodcast.libsyn.com/ TRANSCRIPT COMPUTER Voice message, received April 18, 2020. (beep) FUTURE YOU (scared) Hey. You-in-the-future here. Wish you could get a message back to me. Oh, I hope you are ready! You and Agavepeach. Things are… not good here. Huh. Understatement of the millennium. You can do this. I believe you can. Together. Don’t panic, all right? Get your towel and go. COMPUTER (beep) Message ends. (beat) Message deleted. (beep) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl, who also voiced future you. The computer voice was Charlotte Norup. To hear more from us, check out Y2K and Calling Darkness. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music also from Freesound https://freesound.org/people/Andrewkn/sounds/447511/

Fiction
Published: May 10, 2020, 5:25 p.m.

Strangers In Strange Places, Part 4

The student tries to determine why they were a rat. This episode is made for kids. This episode was written and produced by Tal Minear. The Wizard was voiced by David Hanna, the Student was voiced by Brad Colbroock, and Rion was voiced by Tal Minear. Tal is a podcaster, voice actor, and sound designer with too many passions and too little time. A Mechanical Engineer by daytime, they can be found working on audio fiction by night. Tal is the writer and producer for Sidequesting as well as the co-creator of Light Hearts and Ungifts. They enjoy voice acting in other productions, including Novitero, Sector Ø, and Witches of the City. Check out Tal's work at https://sidequesting.carrd.co/ Check out David's work at https://twitter.com/macintoshmaud Check out Brad's work at https://twitter.com/HolographicVA TRANSCRIPT INTRO: Strangers in Strange Places, Part 4 of 5 [SFX: Pantry door opens, rat squeaks] WIZARD: There you are… Basil, could you hold them in place? Great, thank you. Here we go! [SFX: Rat turns into a human] STUDENT: WHAT IN THE NAME OF MERLIN JUST HAPPENED? RION: Uh, you were a rat? STUDENT: WHY WAS I A RAT? RION: I think it was a mis-aimed spell by your classmate? STUDENT: This does NOT answer my question?! CREDITS: This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written and produced by Tal Minear. The Wizard was voiced by David Hanna, the Student was voiced by Brad Colbroock, and Rion was voiced by Tal Minear.

Fiction
Published: May 10, 2020, 5:20 p.m.

Seward's Folly

Seward bought Alaska, but was it folly? This episode is not explicit. Voiced by Paul Eenhoorn and Michael Crowley of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Seward’s Folly. What are you reading, Mark? I thought the cats and I would learn about U.S. Secretary of State, William H. Seward. I heard that guy was a weirdo. Most people thought he was a bit weird. See, he bought the Alaskan territory from Russia for at the time, a measly $7 million. It was cold, sparsely populated, and didn’t show much promise. Congress people laughed and laughed, and called the whole Alaskan purchase “Seward’s Folly”. See, sounds like a looser. Seward died a few years later, and went to his grave thinking he was America’s biggest loser for buying Alaska. But, in 1896, they found gold in the Klondike. So, he never knew his Alaska purchase was an amazing deal? Not in his life. Wow. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Paul Eenhoorn and Michael Crowley of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: May 10, 2020, 5:15 p.m.

The Fourth Wall

A man walks into a bar... This episode is not explicit. Written by Daniel Rogers, courtesy of 50-Word Stories. Performed by Cass McPhee. Produced by Karin Heimdahl. Writing licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Daniel Rogers hopes everyone is safe and keeping boredom at bay. 50-Word Stories https://fiftywordstories.com/ Karin Heimdahl https://y2kpod.com TRANSCRIPT A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Is this a joke?” The man replies, “No, it’s purely an imaginary situation because we are currently under strict orders to stay at home as much as possible and practise social distancing in order to prevent the spread of the coronavirus.” Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Cass McPhee, produced by Karin Heimdahl and written by Daniel Rogers, courtesy of fiftywordstories.com Daniel Rogers hopes everyone is safe and keeping boredom at bay. Music by Chip Michael.

Fiction
Published: May 10, 2020, 5:10 p.m.

Anxiety

Anxiety, kind of. To start. This episode is not explicit. Kate said things Ignorance Was Bliss is by Kate, a forensic psychologist and crisis clinician who collects stories, in an attempt to figure out how we become who we are. Website: iwbpodcast.com LifeWorld is cohosted by Kate and Derek, and is a look at cybercrime and the methods and personalities behind the use of the Internet as a weapon. Website: https://www.spreaker.com/show/lifeworld iwbpodcast.com and https://www.spreaker.com/show/lifeworld TRANSCRIPT Anxiety is more than feeling nervous. Pretty much everyone feels at least a little nervous, just now. Use those nerves, to remind yourself to stay home and wash your hands. But anxiety can be like a grinding, constant Eeyore cloud overhead, or it can be a specific pattern of thoughts that you just cannot stop. It’s more self-destructive than simple nerves. The best thing that you can do is to reassure people that you care about them and that their experience is valid. And the same for yourself. You matter.

Fiction
Published: May 10, 2020, 5:05 p.m.

The Chick Magnet

Unsuccessful in love, an inventor decides to create the world's first chick magnet - literally. This episode contains potential triggers or upsetting content and is prefaced with a content warning. This episode contains dismemberment. Written by Manen Lyset, Performed by Erin Lilis and Elie Hirschman Manen Lyset is a Canadian horror fiction writer, pumpkin head, and occasional artist. Erin B Liliis is a voice Actress, host of @iAmSubverCity, Bonnie on Mandible Judy, Mrs. Morwood @CallingDarkness, Jenny @CongeriaPodcast, VA on @NoSleepPodcast, Simulacra 2 baddie https://twitter.com/manen_lyset; https://twitter.com/Ravie13; https://twitter.com/ESHbyESH TRANSCRIPT The math was triple-checked, the machines were calibrated, and the animal testing had been a success. He wished he had someone by his side to celebrate. Soon, that wish would come true. He pulled the lever. The super-magnet emitted a whomping sound like a mating call going out into the world. If he couldn’t be a chick magnet, he wanted to build one. It had to work! Suddenly, a long, slender, feminine arm slapped against the wall of the machine, torn away from its owner. Then someone’s foot. Someone else’s arm. A head. Two. Three. So many more. He fell to his knees as a wave of flesh blanketed the horizon. Sound effects by Erin Lilis.

Fiction
Published: May 10, 2020, 5 p.m.

1632 West 21st St Part 6

What will become of Michael and Margaret? And more importantly, who won the Sock Sliding Championships?! This episode is not explicit. Written by Shannon Perry. Performed by Lee Shackleford and Shannon Perry Shannon Perry scribbles stuff. Mostly Oz 9. https://oz-9.com, https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT Dear Margaret, In case you’re wondering why there’s no ice for your 5th Martini and Rossi on the rocks this evening, it’s because the last of the cubes are on my face. I understand your dislike of my sock sliding, but it was the finals, and I was favored for the win. Sprinkling sugar water on the floor was a low blow. Once the sticky stuff is cleaned up, I’m afraid the season will be extending into triple elongated overtime. Also, we have ants. Michael. Music: your wicked ways by Richard J. Freitas, Geraldine Brioso, from Storyblocks

Fiction
Published: May 7, 2020, 9:25 p.m.

1632 West 21st St Part 5

We're nearing the finals of the Hallway Sock Sliding Championship, but not everyone is thrilled to be included. This episode is not explicit. Written by Shannon Perry. Performed by Lee Shackleford and Shannon Perry Shannon Perry scribbles stuff. Mostly Oz 9. https://oz-9.com, https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT Michael, I understand the ongoing self-isolation hasn’t dimmed your enthusiasm for sock sliding in the hallway. While I appreciate the need for good cardiovascular exercise, as the sole breadwinner in the household, I might ask that you either save the sliding for daytime hours, or use ANY OTHER WALL as a backstop. Failure to change your flight path will result in an abrupt cessation of toaster oven privileges, which, given the condition your cheese-on-a Pop-Tart experiment left it in, are already tenuous. Margaret Music: your wicked ways by Richard J. Freitas, Geraldine Brioso, from Storyblocks

Fiction
Published: May 7, 2020, 9:20 p.m.

1632 West 21st St Part 4

Michael clearly doesn't like being assigned tasks, even extremely overdue ones. This episode is not explicit. Written by Shannon Perry. Performed by Lee Shackleford and Shannon Perry Shannon Perry scribbles stuff. Mostly Oz 9. https://oz-9.com, https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT Dear Margaret. Re: Item 17 on the chore list. It’s been so delightfully festive and cozy in our home these last four months, I scarcely realized Christmas was over. However, per your PostIt command and hairy eyeball across the dining room table, the tree has been taken down and dragged out, and is currently convalescing in a dumpster down the block. I swear it thanked me as I pulled it out the front door. Michael. Music: your wicked ways by Richard J. Freitas, Geraldine Brioso, from Storyblocks

Fiction
Published: May 7, 2020, 9:15 p.m.

1632 West 21st St Part 3

Margaret has some complaint about cheese. And item 17. This episode is not explicit. Written by Shannon Perry. Performed by Lee Shackleford and Shannon Perry Shannon Perry scribbles stuff. Mostly Oz 9. https://oz-9.com, https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT Dear Michael. Let he who is capable of Saran Wrapping up the cheese so I don’t have to throw out giant, dried out, crusty bits of cheddar throw the first stone. And, the task sheet, since you’ve ignored it for the past eleven years, seems hardly relevant. However, if you’re going to start referring to it, I suggest you pay attention to item number seventeen. It’s April. Margaret Music: your wicked ways by Richard J. Freitas, Geraldine Brioso, from Storyblocks

Fiction
Published: May 7, 2020, 9:10 p.m.

1632 West 21st St Part 2

Michael's response to Margaret re: division of duties This episode is not explicit. Written by Shannon Perry. Performed by Lee Shackleford and Shannon Perry Shannon Perry scribbles stuff. Mostly Oz 9. https://oz-9.com, https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT Dear Margaret, I’m sure you’re well aware my back bears no such stripe, since I haven’t had a clean shirt to put on it in weeks. Laundry is, according to your task sheet, your responsibility. About thrift, I might just remind you that bits of paper without a layer of adhesive, though less convenient, are even cheaper, and our refrigerator has magnets. Michael Music: your wicked ways by Richard J. Freitas, Geraldine Brioso, from Storyblocks

Fiction
Published: May 7, 2020, 9:05 p.m.

1632 West 21st St Part 1

1632 West 21st Street is the home of Michael and Margaret. For now, anyway.... This episode is not explicit. Written by Shannon Perry. Performed by Lee Shackleford and Shannon Perry Shannon Perry scribbles stuff. Mostly Oz 9. Lee Shackleford is the creator, producer, and lead actor on Relativity podcast. https://oz-9.com, https://relativitypodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT Dear Michael, Per your request not to speak to you again until I have “something nice to say,” I have ordered an 18 pack of Post-It notes from CostCo. I had originally planned to order the “World of Color” pack, but it’s six dollars more expensive, and knowing your love of thrift, I opted for the standard Canary Yellow, which, if nothing else, neatly matches the stripe down your back. Margaret. Music: your wicked ways by Richard J. Freitas, Geraldine Brioso, from Storyblocks

Fiction
Published: May 7, 2020, 9 p.m.

PSA: Time Loops and You!

Our resident scientist walks you through what to do next time you're stuck in a Groundhog Day scenario.    This episode is not explicit.     Written and Performed by Kyle Decker    Kyle Decker is the host of Quest Friends, a farcical sci-fi adventure that explores what friendship looks like one billion years in the future.    https://www.questfriendspodcast.com/    TRANSCRIPT    [VCR being entered] [Peppy 80s PSA music beings]   DR. BUTTERFLY Hello, and welcome to "Time Loops and You," an educational series sponsored by The Foundation to Just Don't Touch Anything in the Past, Please. My name is Dr. Butterfly, and today I'm going to walk you through what to do if you find yourself reliving the same day, month, or year over and over again. Now the first step is to not. Panic. As noted in the article "Groundhog Day" by Murray, B, time loops always revolve around a singular individual who retains a memory of each loop. This is vital to maintaining a healthy ecosystem, as otherwise we would be absolutely powerless to stop the repeating - the repeating - the  re - re - re - [looping gets faster and faster].   [VCR being entered] [Peppy 80s PSA music beings]   DR. BUTTERFLY Hello, and welcome to "Time Loops and You," an educational series sponsored by The Foundation to Just Don't Touch Anything in the Past, Please. [Voice fades out]   KYLE This episode of "Listen. Rinse. Repeat" was written and performed by Kyle Decker of "Quest Friends!"    Music and SFX from Motion Array (https://motionarray.com/)

Fiction
Published: May 6, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

The Editor

A message from The Editor, regarding the joke you made yesterday. This episode contains potential triggers or upsetting content and is prefaced with a content warning. CW: supernatural suspense, loss of control Written and performed by Quinn Majeski Quinn Majeski is the GM of Monster Hour, a Monster of the Week actual play podcast about three unlikely heroes unraveling the sinister mysteries of a strange Colorado town. https://monsterhour.podbean.com/ TRANSCRIPT This is the editor. I took care of that unfortunate joke you made yesterday. Pretty simple cut and fade job. You don’t remember of course, but I wanted to let you know. Try to keep it more upbeat going forward, okay? It would be such an inconvenience to have to edit further. This Episode of Listen Rinse Repeat brought to you by Quinn Majeski of Monster Hour. "Eerie Tone" by The Dweebman, creative commons attribution license. https://freesound.org/people/TheDweebMan/sounds/277192/  

Fiction
Published: May 6, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

Ode to the Commode

Do we think about and show gratitude to those things we use everyday? This episode is a reminder to do so. This episode is explicit. Written by Jefferi Lee; Performed by DeGraft Johnson. Host of Those Guys Over There https://tgot.webflow.io TRANSCRIPT Toy Story...The Brave Little Toaster...Beauty and the Beast. What do they all have in common? If you answered they're all on Disney+, your wrong. The toaster sequels are, but not the original. The answer: sentient household items. All merrily going on about their business and loving what they do. But you know what you rarely see? The bathroom! The room you're in now deserves some love. Imagine your toilet was alive. Think about all the shit it's put up with. It must get pissed off getting pissed on. So before you walk out, tell your toilet thank you...just in case it is alive. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written by Jefferi Lee and voiced by DeGraft Johnson of Those Guys Over There

Fiction
Published: May 6, 2020, 1 a.m.

Love Story

Love scene from a cheap motel room. Written by Oscar Garrett, Performed by Jack Same A kid who lived at the Motel Americana in the 1980s with his family... and bugged the rooms. www.motelamericanapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT In the pre-coital neon He walked across the carpet Of their hourly rate room To break every film convention and cliche He could of about such matters And kissed her. She let him. Kevin Macleod

Fiction
Published: May 6, 2020, 12:55 a.m.

White-throated Sparrow

This is the song of the White-throated Sparrow. This episode is not explicit. Recorded and narrated by Rob Porter. Hi! My name is Rob. I’m a naturalist and software engineer in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. For a decade I’ve been learning bird identification both by eye and ear, and occasionally leading small group birding outings with the Hamilton Naturalists’ Club. In the last few years I’ve also been recording birdsong, both with my handheld setup (iPhone + mic) and with automated bioacoustic recording devices I’ve built or acquired. Last year I set up the Hamilton Bioacoustics Research Project where we’ve recorded thousands of hours of soundscapes in natural spaces throughout our region. We’ve also devised various methods for volunteers to turn the recordings into observational data. This was a stepping-stone towards the creation of the Songbirding podcast. https://songbirding.com/ TRANSCRIPT This is the song of the White-throated Sparrow.

Fiction
Published: May 6, 2020, 12:50 a.m.

Washing Hands with Magus Elgar

Magus Elgar has a special lesson in store for you, acolytes! a new spell! Ignore the beard solution. This episode is made for kids. Written and Directed by Kennedy Phillips, Performed by William Violenus and Christopher Moore, Music by Adam Halpin www.maguselgar.com TRANSCRIPT Magus Elgar Greetings acolytes. It is I, Magus Elgar! Caster extraordinaire and your instructor for today! I’m here to teach you a new spell. Here, Take this! Wizard Perdifluous’ Beard solution! I know what you’re thinking: “I do not have beards on my hands!" But fret not! This solution is meant to purge a wizard's beard of magical malignants and malfeasants, and since you may or may not have a beard, the hands will do! Alright! Let’s begin. Wring your hands like a nefarious ne’er do not. Scheme against the powers that be! That’s it. Let them hear you bark “NOT TODAY.” Udo Malaaki I heard screaming. did you-? Magus Elgar Yelps. Magus Elgar Ahh! Acolyte Udo! Udo Malaaki What are you doing? Magus Elgar Come to enjoy my casting lesson? Udo Malaaki In the bathroom? Magus Elgar How else am I going to get them to wash their hands? Udo Malaaki So you made up a casting lesson to get them to wash their hands with beard soap. Magus Elgar We casters have standards for sanity-zation. Udo Malaaki yeah, I’m sure teaching in a bathroom will establish a standard for your sanity, Magus. Magus Elgar eh, Either way, hands are clean. Music by Adam Halpin

Fiction
Published: May 6, 2020, 12:45 a.m.

Kindred Spirits

A woman reveals her secret for ensuring her partner only has eyes for her. This episode is not explicit. Written by Natalie Reilly Johnson and performed by Simone Low with music by Chris Gregory Natalie Reilly Johnson is a Clinical Psychologist and Writer. She works in a specialist national Eating Disorder service for children and young people. She writes daily flash fiction on Twitter, under the handle: @nreillyjohnson. Natalie lives in South Wales, UK, with her husband, two children and dog. https://www.buzzsprout.com/411730 TRANSCRIPT I knew we were kindred spirits the moment we met. I didn’t want him to look at anyone else, ever. Wanted him to have eyes only for me…..to live for me walking into the room, his life dark and empty without me. I succeeded. He’s been locked in my basement for 10 months now. Chris Gregory, Alternative Stories and Fake Realities

Fiction
Published: May 3, 2020, 8:25 p.m.

Strangers in Strange Places, Part 3

The Wizard is after his student, who is apparently a rat. This episode is made for kids. This episode was written and produced by Tal Minear. Basil was voiced by Sable Smith and The Wizard was voiced by David Hanna. Tal is a podcaster, voice actor, and sound designer with too many passions and too little time. A Mechanical Engineer by daytime, they can be found working on audio fiction by night. Tal is the writer and producer for Sidequesting as well as the co-creator of Light Hearts and Ungifts. They enjoy voice acting in other productions, including Novitero, Sector Ø, and Witches of the City. Check out Sable's work at https://www.tiktok.com/@sableliciousbaby Check out David's work at https://twitter.com/macintoshmaud TRANSCRIPT INTRO: Strangers in Strange Places, Part 3 of 5 BASIL: How did one of your students turn into a rat?? WIZARD: I was teaching magic and a spell went haywire. Students know these things happen, but it’s hard to stay calm when you’re suddenly a rat, you know? BASIL: I suppose they scampered in here and you followed them? WIZARD: Yep, I turned myself into a cat to keep up with them. I didn’t catch them, but I did see where they went. Can I search your pantry? BASIL: Uh, sure? CREDITS: This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written and produced by Tal Minear. Basil was voiced by Sable Smith and The Wizard was voiced by David Hanna.

Fiction
Published: May 3, 2020, 8:20 p.m.

Ken Burns' 'Quarantine': Part 5

Eullabelle replies to Ambrose with thoughts on scheduled grocery delivery This episode is not explicit. Written by John P. Dowgin, Performed by Faith Dowgin and John P. Dowgin John P. Dowgin is a published playwright and screenwriter currently residing in New Jersey. His screenplay 'Mile 42' was a finalist at the '17 Austin Film Festival. John also co-created the comedy podcast 'Mission: Rejected' (@MissionRejected on Twitter) with his partners at The Porch Room, an independent production company whose works have been performed on three continents. A number of their plays have been published by Samuel French as part of the compilation 'Accidents Happen'. missionrejected.simplecast.com TRANSCRIPT ANNOUNCER: PBS proudly presents: Ken Burns' 'Quarantine' EULLABELLE: Dearest Ambrose, Mister Webster has yet to dream up the words for my disgust. What is a five pm grocery delivery window, you ask? I had thought it self-descriptive, yet it is not the case. Mayhaps peapod will grace my door on the 'morrow. I consider myself no 'Karen', but the coming tweet will be most strongly worded. Always, Eullabelle

Fiction
Published: May 3, 2020, 8:15 p.m.

Philanthropy

An expression of gratitude to our multimillionaire philanthropist Enid Flush for her latest invention to save the world This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Fiona Thraille of Dashing Onions Audio Fiona Thraille is a voice actor and audio book narrator/producer who also produces odd, short tales through Dashing Onions Audio podcast. https://dashingonions.buzzsprout.com http://www.thraille.co.uk TRANSCRIPT If you watch the water falling from the tap and are very lucky, you might see a string of droplets in the stream, like a multi-coloured diamond necklace. They are multi-millionaire Enid Flush's sea satellites on their way to clean our oceans. Let them run through your fingers and perhaps make a wish on them as they go on their way. From www.freesound.org S: tap_dribble.wav by swiftoid | License: Creative Commons 0 S: Sparkle 1.wav by zuben | License: Creative Commons 0 S: Sparkle 2.wav by zuben | License: Creative Commons 0 S: Sparkle 3.wav by zuben | License: Creative Commons 0

Fiction
Published: May 3, 2020, 8:10 p.m.

A Harrow Reading

Sit down for a Harrow reading with Vasilisa Morozova This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Elizabeth Wilcox www.dimensiondoorpodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Welcome! Have a seat. Do you mind if I light some incense? [match strikes] Now, what is the question you’ve come to ask the cards? Keep it in your mind. The Harrow shall provide the answer. [cards shuffle] First, select your role. Let me see…Wait. What have you done to my card? It is blank. This is not possible. Who are you? What are you doing?! [scuffling sounds]

Fiction
Published: May 3, 2020, 8:05 p.m.

Heather

There is more to Heather than just being the Head of the City Council. This episode is not explicit. Voiced by Kay Lavergne Jaz and Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Heather. Heather said she was going to get that pothole fixed, but she didn’t. Heather’s been in Broken, Alaska a long time, but she was born in Juneau. I didn’t know that. She was only ten when her mom died. That’s sad. Then her dad, trying to hide from his grief, moved them both to Broken. Eventually, Heather graduated from our very own Warren G. Harding High School. She was so excited to get a college scholarship from the University of Washington! Wow. After years of taking care of her dad, she says when she finally left, it felt like a weight was lifted off her shoulders, and she could breathe for the first time. Then, after only two years at school, Heather’s dad got sick, and she had to come back and take care of him again. More years passed and by the time he finally died, her dreams were squashed and any hopes of returning to school vanished. I didn’t know that either. Yeah, most of the time we just think of Heather as the Head of the City Council. But, there’s more than meets the eye there. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Kay Lavergne Jaz and Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: May 3, 2020, 8 p.m.

Scout Ship Emissary (Part 5)

Captain Bywater lands on Phi Lacertae IV and meets another traveler. The card drawn for this episode was the Six of Diamonds. This episode is not explicit. Played and performed by Grahame Turner from The Role Less Taken (which usually has way more jokes).This has been an Actual Play of ‘Alone Among the Stars’ by Takuma Okada, available at https://noroadhome.itch.io/. therolelesstaken.podbean.com, noroadhome.itch.io/ TRANSCRIPT Ship’s log: Captain Weston Bywater of the Scout Ship Emissary. Planet Phi Lacertae IV [Dice Roll] One Anomaly. [stringed instrument plays] Following a smoke trail, I land near a mountain peak near another ship. A four-armed being sits by a campfire playing a stringed instrument. We do not share any language, but I have a harmonica. [harmonica playing] I play along and… the being claps. [Alien claps] We play together for an hour before they pack up and leave. This has been an Actual Play of ‘Alone Among the Stars’ by Takuma Okada

Fiction
Published: May 3, 2020, 7:55 p.m.

Soap 2.0

It's an ad for Soap 2.0. This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Kendon Luscher https://www.buzzsprout.com/815707 TRANSCRIPT Hi. My name is Jerry Leggingsworth, and I'm here to talk to you about Soap 2.0. What's that? It's the new soap that's the second kind of soap, but it's got a new UI. And it has a confusing new UI. What's a UI? I'm glad you asked. I ran out of time. Buy my new Soap 2.0. Kendon Luscher

Fiction
Published: May 3, 2020, 7:50 p.m.

Send to Sender - Part 4 of 4

In outer space, technician Shula receives a worrying message from her wife - Néa. What will Shula find on her return? This episode is not explicit. Computer - Marnie Warner Néa - Tal Minear Written and produced by Kirsty Woolven. Kirsty Woolven is a voice actor from the UK who can be heard in many current and upcoming audio fiction podcasts, like Y2K, The Kingery, Sidequesting and Descendants. Currently, she is creating her first audio drama - Arrivals. Arrivals is an upcoming audio drama set in two alternate realities; one of them is for people sent to live the rest of their lives in solitude. Sidequesting, a fantasy podcast about avoiding the main plot. Marnie is a voice actor who can currently be heard in Smoke & Mirrors, Finding Atlas (To Have & To Hold), and an upcoming episode of The Pilgrimage Saga. Arrivals - https://arrivalspod.carrd.co/ Sidequesting - https://sidequesting.carrd.co/ TRANSCRIPT Send to Sender - Part 4 of 4 COMPUTER - System install complete. [Beep] COMPUTER - Incoming message. Historical. [Message loads.] NÉA - Hey...it’s Néa. So I have some bad-good news, our daughter, May, arrived today...with a little help. I’ve missed you...Oh! A little warning, the navigation department says that a minor solar flare will pass by you, which might garble your pod’s computer. Anyway, see you soon - bye! KIRSTY - This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written and produced by Kirsty Woolven. The Computer was voiced by Marnie Warner, and Néa was voiced by Tal Minear. SFX: freeSFX - http://freesfx.co.uk Music: Very Low Note by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4581-very-low-note License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: May 3, 2020, 7:45 p.m.

Home Delivery

Almost everything is suddenly available for home delivery. Almost. This episode is not explicit. Written by Susan Gale Wickes, courtesy of 50-Word Stories. Produced and performed by Ashley Kay. Writing licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Susan Gale Wickes is from Indiana. She looks forward to a return to normalcy. Ashley Kay (aka Calibri Funtimes) is an aspiring voice actor who lives in Boston with her two dorky cats and her nerdy spouse. She spends most of her time on twitter @CalibriFuntimes 50-Word Stories https://fiftywordstories.com/ TRANSCRIPT “Your box of sunshine is here,” the cheerful delivery man said after ringing the bell. I watched him skip down the steps, ever mindful of social distancing. Since the pandemic, almost everything suddenly became available for home delivery. Almost. My delivery of friends and family is still on back order. Credits This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced and produced by Ashley Kay, and written by Susan Gale Wickes, courtesy of fiftywordstories.com Susan Gale Wickes is from Indiana. She looks forward to a return to normalcy.

Fiction
Published: May 3, 2020, 7:40 p.m.

Assassin's Creed Odyssey – 20 Second Game Reviews

Matt from the Controller Disconnected podcast briefly reviews the game Assassin's Creed Odyssey This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Matheus Carneiro With previous experience in the YouTube series Mystery Science Theater F1 and a recent graduate with a bachelor's degree in film, Matheus Carneiro now advances to the podcasting world talking about his great loves: video games and movies. https://condisconnected.com TRANSCRIPT Hi! I'm Matheus Carneiro from the Controller Disconnected podcast, here with a 20 second review of the game Assassin's Creed Odyssey starting... now! An incredibly immersive game, perfect for our locked in state. The world is very detailed, the quests are mostly good, and the gameplay is very fun whether you play it stealthily or charge your enemies head on. If you want something to kill a lot of time with, this is the game for you. And that's our time! Remember to dry your hands, and wipe down your controllers and keyboards, and enjoy your gaming everyone!

Fiction
Published: May 3, 2020, 7:35 p.m.

The Sanitize Song

Suit deals with Bob's not-showering-problem with a jaunty tune. This episode is not explicit. Kristi Boulton as Suit, Sean Howard as Bob, Eli McIlveen as Sound Designer and Producer https://civilizedpod.com/ Please note that we sent you two versions. A Short version and a Long version. The latter we had to put in the episode art section as it only allowed one MP3 in the audio file. You can choose! TRANSCRIPT (for the short version) SUIT: Hey Bob BOB: What suit? SUIT: What do you call an ant that smells? Deodor-ant. Ha! Ha! Ha! BOB: I think that joke would be funnier, suit, if you said, ""What do you call an ant that doesn't smell anymore?"" because see its deodorant. SUIT: The punchline is less important than what the context of what the joke was, and the harsh reality is that you stink. BOB: Well, yeah suit, because I haven't had a shower because I've been stuck inside - Whoah! Whoah! Why is stuff turning - WATER! What are you doing? SUIT: Don't worry, Bob. I have an internal sanitization system to make sure that I do not stink. BOB: Oh, lovely. SUIT: Here. There is a handy song to remind you of how long you should sanitize. BOTH SINGING: If you have to sanitize, don't get it in your eyes. You must hypothesize, Why you must sanitize. If you do smell like poo, here's what you gotta do You must go sanitize. (repeat) BOB: (crying) Make it stop! ANNOUNCER: This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was improvised by Kristi Boulton and Sean Howard of Civilized. Sound Design by Eli McIlveen.

Fiction
Published: May 3, 2020, 7:30 p.m.

Bagels and Brunettes - A Bad Day to Forget

"Kennedy and Johnsonovich are forgetting something very important and the Chief is not pleased. This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear. Performed by David S. Dear, Shannon Perry, Karin Heimdahl, and Kyle Jones David is an Audible Approved Producer produces and performs in numerous audiobooks as well as the audio drama A Ninth World Journal and performs in several other audio dramas. https://ninthworldjournal.com https://oz-9.com https://y2kpod.com https://www.discussingnetwork.com TRANSCRIPT NARRATOR Previously on Bagels and Brunettes... JOHNSONIVOWITZ So is that all, Chief? Can we go? CHIEF Aren't you forgetting something? JOHNSONIVOWITZ No, I don't think so... KENNEDY Are we? Not that I can think of... CHIEF It was my birthday yesterday and you two bozos forgot! KENNEDY Was it? Oh geez, we're so sorry... JOHNSONIVOWITZ So so so sorry... CHIEF That's it! Two weeks suspension for both of you! Turn in your badge and your gun! You're still coming to my birthday party tonight, right? Music is ""Hot Pursuit"" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/"

Fiction
Published: May 1, 2020, 4:30 a.m.

Bagels and Brunettes - Poor Coverage

Kennedy needs Johnsonovich to cover her, but... This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear. Performed by David S. Dear, Shannon Perry, Karin Heimdahl, and Kyle Jones David is an Audible Approved Producer produces and performs in numerous audiobooks as well as the audio drama A Ninth World Journal and performs in several other audio dramas.   https://ninthworldjournal.com https://oz-9.com https://y2kpod.com https://www.discussingnetwork.com TRANSCRIPT NARRATOR Previously on Bagels and Brunettes... KENNEDY Cover me, I'm going around back- JOHNSONIVOWITZ Uh, do you have an extra gun I can borrow? KENNEDY You don't have a gun? Where's your gun? JOHNSONIVOWITZ I left it on the bathroom counter when I was brushing my teeth. KENNEDY You have your gun on you while you brush your teeth? JOHNSONIVOWITZ Well, you never know... Music is "Hot Pursuit" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: May 1, 2020, 2 a.m.

Shredded

Can one feel remorse for senseless destruction? This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by David S. Dear. David is an Audible Approved Producer produces and performs in numerous audiobooks as well as the audio drama A Ninth World Journal and performs in several other audio dramas. https://ninthworldjournal.com TRANSCRIPT “You are absolutely thoughtless, you know that?” Calvin spat. “Senseless destruction is all this is! Why, for God’s sake? It’s as if you essentially took my soul and rendered it into a thousand tiny fragments for me to sift through. Happy?” The dog merely stared at him, nonplussed.

Fiction
Published: May 1, 2020, 1:45 a.m.

Bagels and Brunettes - The Dirt

There's something Kennedy and Johnsonovich aren't telling the Chief... This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear. Performed by David S. Dear, Shannon Perry, Karin Heimdahl, and Kyle Jones David is an Audible Approved Producer produces and performs in numerous audiobooks as well as the audio drama A Ninth World Journal and performs in several other audio dramas.   https://ninthworldjournal.com https://oz-9.com https://y2kpod.com https://www.discussingnetwork.com TRANSCRIPT NARRATOR Previously on Bagels and Brunettes... CHIEF Kennedy and Johnsonovich, is there something you want to tell me? KENNEDY I'm not sure... JOHNSONIVOWITZ I don't know what you're talking about, Chief... CHIEF I know you're keeping something g from me. There's something you're not telling me. JOHNSONIVOWITZ Nope. Sorry. KENNEDY I got nothing. CHIEF Oh. Well, I was hoping to get the dish. I'm bored and I wanted to get in on some juicy gossip. KENNEDY You need to get a girlfriend, Chief. Music is "Hot Pursuit" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: May 1, 2020, 1:40 a.m.

The President's Big Desk - One Dollar

The president decides a change needs to be made to our currency. This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear as the Narrator https://ninthworldjournal.com Featuring: Eric Perry of OZ-9 as President Shaburbur https://oz-9.com Nikki Richardson of Top of the Round as Matheson https://totrpodcast.com Music is "For the Fallen" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ TRANSCRIPT PRESIDENT SHABURBUR Matheson! I need you to make sure this change gets implemented immediately. MATHESON What is it, Mr. President? PRESIDENT SHABURBUR See this dollar bill? MATHESON You want me to get you something off the dollar menu at McDonald's, sir? PRESIDENT SHABURBUR No, look at the back. That eye above the pyramid. It's really freaking me out. I want it changed. MATHESON Sir, we can't just change- PRESIDENT SHABURBUR Get Bob Ross. He can make it into something happy. MATHESON Bob Ross is dead, sir. PRESIDENT SHABURBUR Then get anyone but that Picasso guy. I bet he's the one responsible for this in the first place.  

Fiction
Published: May 1, 2020, 1:35 a.m.

Push

Kesslynn's about to find a great gift waiting for her when she goes into her room. This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by David S. Dear, producer of A Ninth World Journal David is an Audible Approved Producer produces and performs in numerous audiobooks as well as the audio drama A Ninth World Journal and performs in several other audio dramas. https://ninthworldjournal.com TRANSCRIPT "Okay, lift your end. Now turn it. The other- no,the other way. I'm pushing.no,. I am pushing! Ugh! Hold on hold on… let's set it down. “This will be totally worth it! When Kesslynn opens her bedroom door and sees this alpaca…”

Fiction
Published: May 1, 2020, 1:30 a.m.

Margaret Hall, Part 5

Margaret Hall finds something strange in the woods around Broken. This episode is not explicit. Voiced and written by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska”. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Margaret Hall. Part 5 Margaret Hall was bruised and battered when she walked back into Broken, Alaska the next day. She scoffed at the help her neighbors offered, and was back on the river the following week, guiding a bunch of tourists from Illinois down the frothy Jackhole River. If you see Margaret down in the Twisted Dinghy one night, ask her about it. She enjoys telling the story of the night she met the giant creature of the forest. Offer to buy her a beer or three and she'll even act out the way the creature howled and snarled as he tried to shake her from that tree. You can almost imagine being out there with her. But, as the evening draws to a close, you'll notice Margaret get a little quieter, and a little pensive. She'll get a far-away look in her eyes and you'll know she's thinking about him; respecting his strength, his survival. Margaret Hall fell a little bit in love that night. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: April 29, 2020, 1:55 a.m.

Margaret Hall, Part 4

Margaret Hall finds something strange in the woods around Broken. This episode is not explicit. Voiced and written by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska”. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Margaret Hall. Part 4 Finally, the creature stopped rocking the massive Sitka Spruce. Margaret heard him panting as he backed away from the tree. She looked down at him and he looked up at her and for the briefest moment, their eyes met. Now, Margaret can't say for sure what that mysterious creature was thinking in that moment, but the way she tells it, she saw something akin to respect in his eyes. He stared at her, heaved a sigh, and maybe, just maybe, nodded a bit before turning and running back the way he had come. The wind kicked up, and the clouds quickly pulled closed the curtain on moonlight, plunging the forest into darkness again. Listen to the conclusion of Margaret Hall’s story in Part 5. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: April 29, 2020, 1:50 a.m.

Margaret Hall, Part 3

Margaret Hall finds something strange in the woods around Broken. This episode is not explicit. Voiced and written by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska”. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Margaret Hall. Part 3 Margaret Hall tried to stand as the creature barreled toward her tree stand, but was held back by the straps that tied her to the tree. She braced herself and clutched her gun to her chest as the animal collided with the giant spruce. He let out a terrible howl as his long arms wrapped half way around the tree trunk, and he leaned his weight back and forth as he began to push and pull the tree. Margaret hollered into the night as she felt the tree begin to sway, her body rocking back and forth with each tug of the creature below. As his pace quickened, her tree swayed like it was in a hurricane, and Margaret saw the sky and the ground alternately flashing before her eyes in rapid pulses. Her homemade granola, her backpack, her camouflage face makeup, her ammo, her water bottle all flew into the air, but Margaret remained in her tree stand, strapped tight to the trunk of the mighty tree as it rocked. Will Margaret survive the terror in her tree? Listen to Part 4 of Margaret Hall! This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: April 29, 2020, 1:45 a.m.

Margaret Hall, Part 2

Margaret Hall finds something strange in the woods. This episode is not explicit. Voiced and written by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska”. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Margaret Hall. Part 2 Margaret held her breath when she saw the massive shadow of the creature lurking below her tree stand in the dark. She froze, her heart pounding in her chest. A slight breeze rustled her hair as it passed, and within seconds Margaret saw the animal tense as her scent hit him. Suddenly, a patch of sky cleared and the full moon shone down like a spot light onto the clearing. Margaret saw the creature staring up at her. It was at least 10 feet tall, and covered head-to-toe in thick hair. Its dark eyes, as large as tea cups narrowed as it began to lurch toward the tree. Margaret, a seasoned pro not disposed to flights of panic, lifted her rifle and shot once, twice, as the creature drew near. The bullets seamed to graze off his shoulders as he ran in her direction. What will the creature do? Listen to Part 3 of Margaret Hall! This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: April 29, 2020, 1:40 a.m.

Lake Iliamna

Anikah is going boating on Lake Iliamna and Rose warns her about the lake monster. This episode is not explicit. Voiced by Kari Aguila and Taylor Edwards of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Lake Iliamna. Have fun boating this weekend, Anikah. Did you know Lake Iliamna is the largest lake in Alaska – big as the state of Connecticut! That's a big lake. But be careful. You ever hear of the lake monster? Ah, no. The creature is said to be over 60 feet long. She can arc her back above the surface, and has been known to bite right through the hull of a rowboat. You don’t really believe that, do you? George tried to see her once. Few summers ago, he went to Lake Iliamna and sat in his boat. The next morning, George walked into "Brooke’s Books and Other Things", Mark poured him a cup of coffee, and asked how the search had gone. George rubbed his hand across his jaw, and said, "Mark, some things in this world just ain't meant to be talked about." Never spoke of it again. Really? Maybe. Have fun boating, though! This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Kari Aguila and Taylor Edwards of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.  

Fiction
Published: April 29, 2020, 1:35 a.m.

Mosquito Lake

George used to visit Mosquito Lake with Mary. This episode is not explicit. Voiced and written by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska”. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Mosquito Lake. George and Mary made their way to Mosquito Lake on the west edge of Broken, Alaska. George had two fishing rods slung over his shoulder. Mary swung the tackle box from her hand as she tucked their red plaid blanket under her arm. They sat side-by-side, lines dangling in the water, talking about their plans for the day when George would finally sell the antiques shop and they'd have enough money for their dream house in Hawaii. Mary’s eyes would sparkle and a dimple would pop into her cheek, and George would fall in love with her all over again. When the cancer took Mary a couple years later, George never really recovered. Most weekdays you can still find him holed up in his antiques shop, no reason in the world to ever retire now. Most weekends, you can find him sitting at the edge of Mosquito Lake, all the reason in the world to long for days gone by. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.  

Fiction
Published: April 29, 2020, 1:30 a.m.

Jumping Frenchmen

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT Jumping Frenchmen of Maine is a bizarre rare condition characterized by an unusually extreme startle response, including repeating the words or actions of others.  Not only will sufferers react with exaggerated movements to surprising stimuli, they also become powerless to refuse commands for a brief time. It was first observed in French-Canadian loggers in New England, hence the name.

Fiction
Published: April 26, 2020, 10:50 p.m.

Iron Eyes Cody

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT Iron Eyes Cody, the Native American seen shedding a single tear in the famous anti-littering PSA from the 70s was actually a Sicilian man born Oscar di Corti.  He was cast to play Native American characters over 100 times and stuck to the fake story of his life even after a reporter talked to his family. In his defense, he did push directors to portray Native characters in a better light.

Fiction
Published: April 26, 2020, 10:45 p.m.

Hippos

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT There are wild hippos in Columbia, which originally belonged to cocaine kingpin Pablo Escobar, and wild camels in Texas that were part of a failed plan by the US Army camel corps.  President Teddy Roosevelt had wanted to import hippos to the US to be raised in the bayou for meat.

Fiction
Published: April 26, 2020, 10:40 p.m.

Heaven's Gate

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT The movie Heaven’s Gate put United Artists studio out of business after the director’s demands tripled the budget– antique trains that required a different gauge of track be laid, that 250 extras be taught to ice skate with old-timey skates, and 1200 extras taught to ride horses and drive wagons.  By day 6 of filming, they were already 5 days behind.

Fiction
Published: April 26, 2020, 10:35 p.m.

Flags

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT Only 2 of the 195 countries in the world today have a flag that does not contain red, white, or blue. Those countries are Jamaica and Mauritania. There is also only one country whose flag is not a quadrilateral, and that is the nation of Nepal whose flag is two triangles stacked one atop the other.

Fiction
Published: April 26, 2020, 10:30 p.m.

Email

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT In a year, an average person’s email adds 300lbs/136kg of CO2 to their carbon footprint, equivalent to 199mi/320km driven in a car.  The world’s email usage generates as much CO2 as having an extra seven million cars on the roads.

Fiction
Published: April 26, 2020, 10:25 p.m.

Highest Court

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT On the fifth floor of the US Supreme court building is a basketball court referred to as the highest court in the land.  Originally a store room, it was converted to a gym sometime in the 1940’s. Only court employees are allowed to use it and there is a sign warning people not to play basketball if court is in session and not to assume court isn’t in session, since the courtroom is directly below.

Fiction
Published: April 26, 2020, 10:20 p.m.

Country Ages

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT British comedians love to joke about the US being a young country, but the US is the oldest country in the western hemisphere and older than a lot of European countries, like Italy and Germany.  In Africa, only Ethiopia and Morocco are older. South Sudan is the youngest country in the world at 9 years old.

Fiction
Published: April 26, 2020, 10:20 p.m.

Brandenburg

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT One month before the Berlin Brandenburg Airport was set to open in 2011, the date got pushed back.  About a dozen times. The fire suppression system was a hazard in and of itself, 4,000 doors were mislabeled, and there was fear the roof would collapse.  It’s still not open and now it needs more money for things like burned-out arrival/departure screens.

Fiction
Published: April 26, 2020, 10:15 p.m.

Banana

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT Banana flavored things don’t taste like bananas because the bananas you eat today are Cavendish bananas, but banana flavoring is based on the gros michel banana, which was almost wiped off the face of the earth by a pathogen called Panama disease.

Fiction
Published: April 26, 2020, 10:10 p.m.

Amputation

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT In 1847, a showboating surgeon performed a leg amputation in 25 seconds.  The patient died. The surgeon had cut two fingers off of his assistant, who got an infection and died.  And a spectator died of a suspected heart attack. It is the only known surgery with a 300% mortality rate.

Fiction
Published: April 26, 2020, 10:05 p.m.

24 Hours of Lemons

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT There is a car race called the 24 Hours of Lemons.  Not LeMans. The cars have to be purchased and repaired for under $500, not including the cost of the mandatory roll cage, kill switch and fire suppression system.  Unsportsmanlike behavior receives creative punishments, like having to walk a lap, carrying a sign that says “I am a big jerk.”

Fiction
Published: April 26, 2020, 10 p.m.

Bagels and Brunettes - A 127

Bagels and Brunettes - A 127 Written by David S. Dear, producer of A Ninth World Journal as the Narrator https://ninthworldjournal.com Featuring: Shannon Perry of Oz 9 as Kennedy https://oz-9.com Karin Heimdahl, producer of Y2K as Johnsonivowitz https://y2kpod.com Kyle Jones, producer of Discussing Network as the Chief https://www.discussingnetwork.com TRANSCRIPT NARRATOR Last time on Bagels and Brunettes... JOHNSONIVOWITZ This is Johnsonivowitz calling for backup. We've got a 118 in progress on 12th and KENNEDY Are you sure about that? I thought this was a 127... JOHNSONIVOWITZ A 127 is a robbery. This is jaywalking. KENNEDY You're calling in backup for a jaywalker? JOHNSONIVOWITZ That's why I said it's a 127. That way we'll be sure to get backup. Music is "Hot Pursuit" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: April 24, 2020, 1:55 a.m.

Scout Ship Emissary (Part 4)

Weston concludes his exploration of Zera Laporis II by finding the ruins of a city. The card drawn for this episode was the Five of Hearts. This episode is not explicit. Played and performed by Grahame Turner from The Role Less Taken (which usually has way more jokes).This has been an Actual Play of ‘Alone Among the Stars’ by Takuma Okada, available at https://noroadhome.itch.io/. therolelesstaken.podbean.com TRANSCRIPT Ship’s log: Captain Weston Bywater of the Scout Ship Emissary. Planet Zeta Leporis II [Dice Roll] Part 3 of 3 Walking for the last time before departing. In some trees, I see a treehouse? Several treehouses with bridges between them. I climb up They’re made of a light, porous stone that is affixed to the branches. All houses are empty, I find no furniture and no belongings. This has been an Actual Play of ‘Alone Among the Stars’ by Takuma Okada

Fiction
Published: April 24, 2020, 1:50 a.m.

Margaret Hall, Part 1

Margaret Hall saw something strange in the woods. This episode is not explicit. Voiced and written by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska”. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Margaret Hall. Part 1 It was before dawn, and Margaret Hall was already in her deer stand high up in the forest around Broken, Alaska. Clouds covered the sky, blocking out the full moon she knew was out there. She’d strapped herself to the tree so she wouldn't fall out of the stand, and was tucking her sleeping bag around her shoulders to keep warm, when she heard something in the distance. It sounded more like a bear than a deer, but she waited. Silently, she slipped the top of her body out of the sleeping bag, picked up her rifle, and checked the safety before holding it lightly across her chest. Margaret could hear branches cracking as the animal got closer to her tree. She sensed it more than she saw it when it finally reached the small clearing to her left. It was a shadow, a massive tall thing, and it walked on two feet, its long arms dangling by its sides. Want to hear more? Listen for Part 2 of Margaret Hall. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: April 24, 2020, 1:45 a.m.

Prometheus

A very short story about regret... and eagles. This episode contains potential triggers or upsetting content and is prefaced with a content warning. This one is darkly humorous, a bit misanthropic and contains very vague reference to violence. Written, Performed and Produced by Dan Goldstein Dan Goldstein is the creator, writer, performer and producer of The Gods We Belong To podcast. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-gods-we-belong-to/id1487732465 TRANSCRIPT Prometheus - You humans weren't worth it. You looked so sad, huddled in caves for warmth. “Why not help?” I thought. “It's only fire. What's the worst that could happen?” Well it kept happening. Tribes, nations, faiths... any excuse to throw each other on the fire I gave you. Me? I got an eternity of awful anticipation and violent eagle surgery. So, you're welcome. But you're definitely not worth it. Depressed Buddhist by Unheard Music Concepts

Fiction
Published: April 24, 2020, 1:40 a.m.

Song Sparrow

The Song Sparrow is a small stripped sparrow with a big personality, found across North America in fields, meadows, marshes, and sometimes in backyards. Hi! My name is Rob. I’m a naturalist and software engineer in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. For a decade I’ve been learning bird identification both by eye and ear, and occasionally leading small group birding outings with the Hamilton Naturalists’ Club. In the last few years I’ve also been recording birdsong, both with my handheld setup (iPhone + mic) and with automated bioacoustic recording devices I’ve built or acquired. Last year I set up the Hamilton Bioacoustics Research Project where we’ve recorded thousands of hours of soundscapes in natural spaces throughout our region. We’ve also devised various methods for volunteers to turn the recordings into observational data. This was a stepping-stone towards the creation of the Songbirding podcast. LINK https://songbirding.com/ @SongbirdingPod on Twitter TRANSCRIPT This is the song of the Song Sparrow. [birdsong]

Fiction
Published: April 24, 2020, 1:35 a.m.

Wishing Ring

A witch discovers the downside of owning the world's first wishing ring. This episode is not explicit. Written by Lena Stone and performed by Simone Low with music and sound design by Chris Gregory Lena Stone is a British writer and sometime contributor to the Alternative Stories Podcast Simone Low is a Scottish voice over artist recording corporate, commercial, short stories and on-hold messages from her home studio. Equipped with a degree in radio and broadcasting and over 5 years voice over experience, her dulcet tones have been used by the likes of Singleton Whisky, Scottish Power and RBS. https://www.buzzsprout.com/411730 TRANSCRIPT I did it – created the first ever fully functioning wishing ring! I’m wearing it now. I wish for a drink and it appears in my hand, wish for money and my purse bulges. The council of witches said it couldn’t be done, said no object could be strong enough to hold that powerful magic! I wish I could be a fly on the wall when they hear about my success! Oh ! oh god no! Chris Gregory, Alternative Stories and Fake Realities

Fiction
Published: April 24, 2020, 1:30 a.m.

Strange Eggs - Shark

Sharks lay strange eggs. This episode is not explicit. Story by PRRP, Music by Mx Michael https://www.patreon.com/freckle TRANSCRIPT Sharks lay spiral eggs. Not all sharks, just some sharks, like the horned or bullhead sharks, but all shark eggs are exceptionally strange. Let’s just focus on these for now. These eggs look akin to a conical seashell or giant screw; they are often jet black, airplane black, with equally-spirally tendrils hanging from the bottom. These tendrils will catch against rocks or algae, as if an anchor, so they don’t wash away in the vast expanse of the ocean. It seems parent sharks don’t tend to look after their young, so I guess it behooves them to hatch somewhere secure. But I say let them drift away, for all I care. These eggs freak me out. Sharks lay strange eggs.

Fiction
Published: April 22, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

The Perfect Storm, part 2

It's a stormy midnight on the mountaintops. Anything could happen... and it usually does. This episode is not explicit. Voiced by Iri Alexander and written by Shannon Perry, both of Oz 9. oz-9.com TRANSCRIPT Sarah: I always loved storms. Even as a child, I knew their power was an instrument of change and nothing to be afraid of. My mother taught me to run between the raindrops and let the wind push at my back until my real wings were strong enough to carry me. We gather at the mountaintops when the storms come. If you listen between the thunder, you can hear us howl at the moon. This episode of Listen Rinse Repeat was voiced by Iri Alexander and written by Shannon Perry of Oz 9.

Fiction
Published: April 22, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

Dirty

Written, produced and performed by: Orlando Segarra Just Press Playhouse is made up of Orlando Segarra and Gabe Templin. JPP produces Time Trip! and an anthology channel Just Press Playhouse Presents which houses Kid Pros and stand alone episodes such as Lights On in Puerto Rico! Time Trip!: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/time-trip/id1491176296 Kid Pros: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/just-press-playhouse-presents/id1145020758 TRANSCRIPT HYPNO VOICE Dirty. You’re so dirty. Yeah. Turn that faucet on. Yeah. There you go. Do it. Pump that soap. Pump it. More. More for your hands. Scrub scrub scrub. Dirty human. Wash your hands like the nasty person you are. You’re so filthy. Nice and soapy. Wash those dirty hands you filthy human. Don’t forget between your fingers. Nasty. Wash your dirty, filthy hands. You’re such a filthy person. Now rinse. Rinse. Rinse them all off. There you go. You’ll be back. You can’t help yourself. You dirty thing.

Fiction
Published: April 22, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

Generization

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT Jet ski, jacuzzi, kleenex, and thermos are all brand names, as are cellophane, escalator, trampoline, dry ice, velcro, chapstick, laundromat, kerosene, zipper, hovercraft, video tape, dumpster, and yo-yo.  The process of a brand name coming to stand for all similar products is genericization. 

Fiction
Published: April 22, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

Nigel Pillow Interviews Sir Ian McKellen

Almost Pulitzer Prize winning film critic and man desperate for relevancy, Nigel Pillow, interviews the one and only Sir Ian McKellen. This episode is explicit. Written by Ann Sloan, Performed by David Allen, Ann Sloan https://www.carlottapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT NIGEL PILLOW: I’m Nigel Pillow, former editor of Film Comment magazine and now I do bonus content for The Carlötta Beautox Chroncles. Keep me in your prayers. Today, I am sitting down with one of the greatest stage and screen stars of all time, Sir Ian McKellen. IAN MCKELLEN: Hello, hello, hello, I’m Ian McKellen, Kellen, Kellen. NIGEL PILLOW: We seem to be experiencing some technical difficulties with your audio. Perhaps we can have the engineer check the connection? ENGINEER: Sir Ian, can we get a sound check please? IAN MCKELLEN: Certainly. Certainly. I like big butts and I can not lie. Lie. Lie. NIGEL PILLOW: Perhaps we’ll connect with him another time. Quel domage. "NewsSting" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/)

Fiction
Published: April 22, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

Send to Sender - Part 3 of 4

In outer space, technician Shula receives a worrying message from her wife - Néa. What will Shula find on her return? This episode is not explicit. Shula - Kirsty Woolven Computer - Marnie Warner Néa - Tal Minear Written and produced by Kirsty Woolven. Kirsty Woolven is a voice actor from the UK who can be heard in many current and upcoming audio fiction podcasts, like Y2K, The Kingery, Sidequesting and Descendants. Currently, she is creating her first audio drama - Arrivals. Arrivals is an upcoming audio drama set in two alternate realities; one of them is for people sent to live the rest of their lives in solitude. Sidequesting, a fantasy podcast about avoiding the main plot. Marnie is a voice actor who can currently be heard in Smoke & Mirrors, Finding Atlas (To Have & To Hold), and an upcoming episode of The Pilgrimage Saga. Arrivals - https://arrivalspod.carrd.co/ Sidequesting - https://sidequesting.carrd.co/ TRANSCRIPT Send to Sender - Part 3 of 4 [Shula is fixing partition 5 while humming.] SHULA - That should be it - let’s power up. [Shula flips the switch to power partition 5 back on.] COMPUTER - Incoming message. Historical. [A garbled message from Néa plays - it’s difficult to pick out what is being said.] [Shula drops her spanner.] SHULA - May..day? Help? A...solarflare?! I have to go back now - what if Néa’s hurt? KIRSTY - This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written and produced by Kirsty Woolven, who also voiced Shula. The Computer was voiced by Marnie Warner and Néa was voiced by Tal Minear. SFX: freeSFX - http://freesfx.co.uk Music: Very Low Note by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4581-very-low-note License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: April 22, 2020, 1 a.m.

Villainous Anonymous

Dr. Schwarm has a fatal misunderstanding for why we are all here. This episode is made for kids. Written and Performed by Kennedy Phillips, Music by Adam Halpin www.maguselgar.com www.kennedyphillips. org. TRANSCRIPT NARRATOR Greetings, and welcome to Listen Rinse and Repeat. Today episode is entitled: Villainous Anonymous. I am Kennedy Phillips, your entertainer for today. Please apply your soap generously to your hands, and prepare to sanitize. Three two one, begin! INT. COMMUNITY CENTER, DAY. Slam! The door is opened as people are discussing and washing their hands. DR. SCHWARM Ah! Yes it appears I am right on time. Behold fellow villains, I am Dr. Schwarm. And welcome to our monthly meetup! I see by your hands rubbing fervently together that you are EAGER to begin our diabolical planning. Ahahahaha! I have planned our itinerary to take control of the tricounty area. The streets are empty, and RIPE for conquest! Ding! DR. SCHWARM (CONT’D) What was that? NARRATOR You may now begin rinsing your hands. Well done. DR. SCHWARM Oh my god was this a hand washing party?! I-I-I am so sorry, my mistake, please go about your business. And don’t call the cops! You uh, you need to sanitize your phones before you do, very dirty! And while you do that- it’ll give me a head start to run! Running away. DR. SCHWARM (CONT’D) This is merely the calm before the schwarm! Ahahahaha! NARRATOR This has been Villainous anonymous, Presented by Kennedy Phillips from the Magus Elgar podcast. We thank you for washing. Music by Adam Halpin

Fiction
Published: April 19, 2020, 8:55 p.m.

Gremdemic

Georgie grows restless during a month-long gremdemic, a gremlin pandemic. This episode is not explicit. Written by Kat Walker Shea and Rachel Greenberg Georgie voiced by Socks Whitmore Zabel voiced by Kat Walker Shea Kat Walker Shea and Rachel Greenberg are an LA based Director/Writer team. Kat is the creator of Georgie Romero Is Done For, a horror comedy podcast, and Rachel is the show’s co-director and co-writer. They met as students at CalArts and have worked together ever since. https://anchor.fm/georgieromeroisdonefor TRANSCRIPT [GREMLINS SCREECHING AND SCRATCHING OUTSIDE] GEORGIE: This is so boring. We’ve been stuck inside the mansion for a month! ZABEL: This is what happens when the gremlins invade a town. Gremlin Control will handle it soon. GEORGIE: Hanako’s taken over the TV to watch Kdramas. Do ghosts even need to be in lockdown? Zabel: I guess not, but she’ll take any excuse to binge her dramas. I really like that one about the handsome monster dating the pretty yet very clumsy human…. Georgie: Please, no Kdrama recaps. Zabel: You could help me with this sourdough bread spell? Georgie: Why don’t you just bake it? You know, like humans do. Zabel: Georgie, I’m not that bored. Georgie: Then I guess I’ll rise to the occasion then. Zabel: Oh gods, quarantine is pushing us all to the edge. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Socks Whitmore and Kat Walker Shea of Georgie Romero Is Done For. It was written by Kat Walker Shea of Georgie Romero Is Done For. Thank you for listening! Sound Effects: freesound.org

Fiction
Published: April 19, 2020, 8:50 p.m.

Strangers In Strange Places, Part 2

Why is there a wizard in Basil's house? This episode is made for kids. This episode was written and produced by Tal Minear. The Wizard was voiced by David Hanna and Rion was voiced by Tal Minear. Tal is a podcaster, voice actor, and sound designer with too many passions and too little time. A Mechanical Engineer by daytime, they can be found working on audio fiction by night. Tal is the writer and producer for Sidequesting as well as the co-creator of Light Hearts and Ungifts. They enjoy voice acting in other productions, including Novitero, Sector Ø, and Witches of the City. Check out Tal's work at https://sidequesting.carrd.co/ Check out David's work at https://twitter.com/macintoshmaud TRANSCRIPT INTRO: Strangers in Strange Places, Part 2 of 5 [SFX: Cat shapeshifts into a person.] WIZARD: I’m sorry for borrowing your scarf, I get really cold when I’m a cat, for some reason. RION: But, why were you a cat? And why were you in Basil’s house? WIZARD: Well, I’m a wizard. My specialty is transformation, you see. I’m here because one of my students accidentally got turned into a rat. RION: Okay I have some more questions. CREDITS: This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written and produced by Tal Minear. The Wizard was voiced by David Hanna and Rion was voiced by Tal Minear.

Fiction
Published: April 19, 2020, 8:45 p.m.

Dear Martha

A postcard from husband to wife, remembering an old dog they had. Written by Oscar Garrett, Performed by Jack Same A kid who lived at the Motel Americana in the 1980s with his family... and bugged the rooms. www.motelamericanapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT The following was found written on a postcard sent from the Motel Americana dated July 5th, 1987: Dear Martha, Nothing like a road trip to get you strolling down memory lane. I’m in Jersey at a place called the Motel Americana and for some reason been thinking about that dog we had when the kids were little. Remember? Kids called her Glory? Frisky little pup, couldn’t sit still, then protected those kids like nobody’s business. Turned into a pretty creature. Regal. Still breaks my heart to think how quick she got so old. Her eyes clouded so she couldn’t see straight. Bit anyone came knocking on the door. Then barking and growling at us , her own folks, poor thing. Then pissing inside the house, on the rug your mother gave us, pissing on her own bed. Had us screaming at each other trying to figure what to do about her. It was like she knew almost, then just disappeared. I loved that do. Old Glory. Hope to be home soon, George Kevin Macleod

Fiction
Published: April 19, 2020, 8:40 p.m.

MARTHA!!

What happens when your greatest enemy uncovers your ultimate weakness? This episode is not explicit. Performed by Kary Brown and Lee Shackleford. Written by Kyle Jones based on the concept by Clarence Brown. https://discussingnetwork.com TRANSCRIPT BATMAN: This is it, Joker. JOKER: IT?? I am not IT you Bat-brained nincompoop! BATMAN: Surrender and return to Arkham before anyone else gets hurt. JOKER: Oh, Bats..Bats..Bats. The jokes on you! After all these years I have ultimately discovered the one thing that will FINALLY break the bat. The one single simple solitary syllable, or is that double syllable? (LAUGHS) One Word! Your ultimate weakness. BATMAN: No more jokes, Joker. JOKER: Ok, I’ll tell you! Always taking the fun outta everything. Remember that time when you and the big red boyscout decided to spend two excruciatingly boring hours trying to prove who’s the alpha male? BATMAN: Oh, no. JOKER: I’m gonna say it! I’m gonna say it!! BATMAN: Go, you can go. Please, don’t. Not again! JOKER: (LAUGHS) MARTHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fiction
Published: April 19, 2020, 8:35 p.m.

Self-care

Self-care isn't all bubble baths and chocolate. This episode is not explicit. Kate said things Ignorance Was Bliss is by Kate, a forensic psychologist and crisis clinician who collects stories, in an attempt to figure out how we become who we are. Website: iwbpodcast.com LifeWorld is cohosted by Kate and Derek, and is a look at cybercrime and the methods and personalities behind the use of the Internet as a weapon. Website: https://www.spreaker.com/show/lifeworld iwbpodcast.com and www.spreaker.com/show/lifeworld TRANSCRIPT I want to address self-care, for just a second. A lot of people are talking about all of the things they’re getting done around their house, or new projects they’re talking on, or ways they’re pampering themselves, during the quarantine. Good for them. Really. But for some of us, getting out of bed is a big deal. Remembering to eat. Scrolling, or avoiding, social media. Making eye contact. It all counts. Give yourself credit for the things you can accomplish, not criticism for the things you think you should be doing. You matter.

Fiction
Published: April 19, 2020, 8:30 p.m.

Little Old Man

Things and people can look so different depending on the time of day. This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Isaiah Frizzelle of The Bird Brain Podcast. The Bird Brain Podcast is a unique birdie with a mix of Health and Wellness on Mondays, and Fridays short horror stories on the sub chapter “Night Owl”; Flight or Fright. TRANSCRIPT “Little Old Man” Written By Isaiah Frizzelle Transcript The old man across the street would always go for walks in the morning. Everyday, a slow shuffle, hunched over, bit by bit. I watched him from my window every morning, talking to himself, walking to the end of the street and back. One morning I didn’t see him. But that night, Old man didn’t seem so old anymore as I watched him walk up to my door with something shiny in his hand.

Fiction
Published: April 19, 2020, 8:25 p.m.

Future You: Part 5 of 8

”Hello past me, future you again.” In March and April of 2020, someone is receiving voicemails from… themselves in the future? This episode is not explicit. This story in eight parts was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. FUTURE YOU – Karin Heimdahl COMPUTER – Charlotte Norup To hear more from us, check out audio dramas Y2K and Calling Darkness. https://y2kpod.com/ https://callingdarknesspodcast.libsyn.com/ TRANSCRIPT COMPUTER Voice message, received April 7, 2020. (beep) FUTURE YOU (serious) Hello past me, future you again. Things… Many things are going to go very wrong, and you are fast approaching the tipping point. April 20th. That’s the date. I don’t even remember what I did that day. Seems like it was just another day in quarantine. But you… you have to change it. You have to. COMPUTER (beep) Message ends. (beat) Message deleted. (beep) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl, who also voiced future you. The computer voice was Charlotte Norup. To hear more from us, check out Y2K and Calling Darkness. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music also from Freesound https://freesound.org/people/Andrewkn/sounds/447511/

Fiction
Published: April 19, 2020, 8:20 p.m.

Friendships

Just two pals being pals. This was inspired when I overheard my daughter talking to a Halloween decoration. Written and performed by Mandy Hall of The Devil Hates Mondays. Mandy Hall is a counselor by day, a podcaster by night, and a nerd all the time. They've worked on Shoebox Podcast and Zoo podcast, and their newest show is The Devil Hates Mondays. Guest appearances by their 6-year old daughter, who enjoys being creepy. TRANSCRIPT Friend: Friendship's funny. It's strong as steel, but with one well-placed strike, you can swipe the whole thing away. Spider: Hmmm! Friend: I don't know why they call it ghosting when people just disappear on you. Everyone knows ghosts stick around forever. It's impossible to get rid of them! Spider: I like blood. Friend: Me too. Come on, spider, let's go ruin some friendships. This episode of Listen, Rinse Repeat was written and performed by Mandy Hall of The Devil Hates Mondays.

Fiction
Published: April 19, 2020, 8:15 p.m.

Scout Ship Emissary (Part 3)

Captain Bywater explores the polar regions of Planet Zeta Leporis II. The card drawn for this episode was the Eight of Clubs. This episode is not explicit. Played and performed by Grahame Turner from The Role Less Taken (which usually has way more jokes).This has been an Actual Play of ‘Alone Among the Stars’ by Takuma Okada, available at https://noroadhome.itch.io/. therolelesstaken.podbean.com TRANSCRIPT Ship’s log: Captain Weston Bywater of the Scout Ship Emissary. Planet Zeta Leporis II [Dice Roll] Part 2 of 3 There is a type of tree that grows in the sub-zero temperatures of the south pole of this planet. While examining a sample, I find that it is a pale purple beneath the layer of ice, with pale, yellow needles that appear healthy. It gives no fruit, but could make suitable lumber. This has been an Actual Play of ‘Alone Among the Stars’ by Takuma Okada

Fiction
Published: April 19, 2020, 8:10 p.m.

Ostium Network Recording 3

Steve Chase reporting from the Ostium Network. Written and performed by Alex C. Telander. Creator and writer for the Ostium Podcast, the Circe Podcast, and Writing Walks. http://www.ostiumpodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Don’t know why that keeps happening. But I was going to say it even changed the way business was done. It wasn’t all about money and getting rich and being greedy anymore. It was about providing for those less fortunate. Being rich became a bad thing. A shameful thing. And in the end everyone was brought together, while the world healed. I just thought you should know. I hope it helps wherever you are. Radio Static from Gowlermusic at Freesound.org.

Fiction
Published: April 19, 2020, 8:05 p.m.

Ken Burns 'Quarantine': Part 4

In this edition of Ken Burns Quarantine, Eullabelle replies to Ambrose about home schooling This episode is not explicit. Written by John P. Dowgin. Performed by Faith Dowgin and John P. Dowgin John P. Dowgin is a published playwright and screenwriter currently residing in New Jersey. His screenplay 'Mile 42' was a finalist at the '17 Austin Film Festival. John also co-created the comedy podcast 'Mission: Rejected' (@MissionRejected on Twitter) with his partners at The Porch Room, an independent production company whose works have been performed on three continents. A number of their plays have been published by Samuel French as part of the compilation 'Accidents Happen'. https://missionrejected.simplecast.com/ TRANSCRIPT ANNOUNCER: PBS proudly presents, Ken Burns 'Quarantine'. EULLABELLE: Dearest Ambrose, Had I wished to serve as an schoolmarm, I'd have endeavored to educate myself. I did not, yet here I stand, trying to calm a wee one who wishes not to color number animals, whilst explaining Shakespeare to the teen. Macbeth can suck it. The cabernet is my respite. Always, Eullabelle

Fiction
Published: April 19, 2020, 8 p.m.

MULTIVERSAL DIAL 378

Your radio has been acting weird... You're not sure the transmissions are from this universe... This episode is not explicit. Voiced, written, and produced by Cap Blackard of The Call of Cthulhu Mystery Program. Cap Blackard is a multidisciplinary artist specializing in writing, illustration, and podcasting. She's the showrunner of the award-winning audio drama, The Call of Cthulhu Mystery Program, a queer horror-comedy; co-creator the forthcoming animated series, Lightning Dogs; and is Mother Brain of Omniverse, her media company focused on storytelling podcasts. Her forthcoming series, TRANScend is a genre-bending autobiography exploring her transgender journey and the interconnectedness of all things. https://cthulhumystery.com https://omniverse.media TRANSCRIPT [Radio dial static] AUDIBLE AUDIO: Business Lube is made with genuine caterpillars. [Radio dial static] [Plucky, friendly music] CHEERFUL WOMAN: I love hot noods. For a quiet night in, a romantic evening, or getting the whole family together. Those store bought noods just don’t do it for me. It’s gotta be the homemade stuff - like momma used to make. All kinds of noods: thick and round, thin and nimble, or twisted into strange shapes. That’s why I use send noods - a noodle delivery service that brings artisanal noods direct to your door. [Door knocking/open] DELIVERY MAN: Your spaghetti noodles, mam! Nice and long, perfect for slurping. CHEERFUL WOMAN: Mmm. I’ll say. Send Noods. There’s never a dull night when you send noods. [Radio static/ Dial noises] CAP BLACKARD: This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced, written, and produced by Cap Blackard of The Call of Cthulhu Mystery Program. [OMNIVERSE AUDIO BRAND] Sunny Weekend by Diva Production Music - Licensed via Melody Loops

Fiction
Published: April 16, 2020, 1:25 p.m.

Hard Pressed

Priorities are hard. This episode is not explicit. Hard Pressed was written and performed by Jordache and Nikki Richardson from the Top of the Round Podcast. totrpodcast.com TRANSCRIPT HARD PRESSED TRANSCRIPT WRITTEN AND PERFOMED BY JORDACHE AND NIKKI RICHARDSON Dr: [mumbling] If I could find a way to keep the temperature down but increase the pressure on the fluids then I should be able to theoretically not see a decrease in the concentration levels of – Rachael: Sir shouldn’t you get back to the --- Dr.: Not now Rachael! Can’t you see I am doing essential work! Now where was I? Right, if I can increase the pressure Rachael: Dr. Fibonacci, it’s just, you’re spiraling again. Sir. Dr. Fibonacci: I, you’re right Rachael. It’s a bad habit, but do you not think this work is essential?! Rachael: Compared to the governor asking you to find a way to get test results faster? No I think the new French press can wait. Progress by AlekSound Link: https://filmmusic.io/song/6019-progress License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: April 16, 2020, 1:20 p.m.

Becky and the Ocelot

Becky is having trouble with an ocelot. This episode is not explicit. Written by David S. Dear. Performed by Sarah Golding and David Ault. David is an Audible Approved Producer produces and performs in numerous audiobooks as well as the audio drama A Ninth World Journal and performs in several other audio dramas. https://ninthworldjournal.com https://sarahgoldingvoiceactorandmore.weebly.com/ http://www.davidault.co.uk/ TRANSCRIPT BECKY Excuse me... I need to return this. SHOPKEEP Um, that's an ocelot. BECKY Yes, I know it's an ocelot. I wish to return it. SHOPKEEP Why in God's name would you think that was a good idea? Having an ocelot as a pet? BECKY It was not meant to be a pet. It was supposed to be a helper ocelot. SHOPKEEP And you don't see the problem with that? BECKY Of course I do! It's not helping! Music is "Music to Delight" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: April 16, 2020, 1:15 p.m.

Astronomy

Lars went to Palmer to see the Pope's Astronomer! This episode is not explicit. Voiced by Kevin Traywick and Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Astronomy. Hey, Lars! How was your trip over to Palmer? Pretty good. I got to see the Pope’s astronomer. THE Pope’s astronomer? Yep, he was doing a lecture on astronomy, religion, the universe. In Palmer, Alaska. Father Francis O'Bean asked me to go to the lecture and tell him about it. He loves stuff like that. Yeah, Fr. Francis is always pondering those big questions, like, Why are we here? What's the meaning of life? I guess, as the light fades from the sky, and the aurora borealis begin to dance across the darkness above, these are the things worth thinking about. So, did the Pope’s astronomer reveal all? Did you learn all the secrets of the universe in that lecture? Actually, I fell asleep after it started. You fell asleep?! Well, it was really hot in that room and they turned out all the lights. Fair enough. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Kevin Traywick and Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: April 16, 2020, 1:10 p.m.

Birth Mark

Written by Charlotte O’Farell Voice : Joy Hayward Music and Sound Design : Chris Gregory Alternative Stories and Fake Realities is an anthology podcast producing audio drama, short fiction and poetry using writers and actors from both sides of the Atlantic from its base right in the middle of England. You can find us by searching alternative stories in your favourite podcast app or clicking on https://www.buzzsprout.com/411730 We’re social on twitter https://twitter.com/StoriesAlt And Instagram https://www.instagram.com/stories.alt/ Email: office@alternativestories.com Charlotte O’Farell is a horror writer. A lifelong fan of the genre, she aims to share her love of the weird and wonderful with her readers. Her stories have appeared in 25 anthologies. She writes daily flash fiction on Twitter. @ChaOFarrell and always enjoys interacting with her readers. She lives in Nottingham with her husband, daughter and cat. https://www.amazon.com/Charlotte-OFarrell/e/B07SBKX1G6?ref=dbs_p_ebk_w0m_abau_000000  Joy Hayward is a prolific voice actor and member of the Alternative Stories team. TRANSCRIPT “I looked nothing like my parents. “You’re special”, they told me. “The stork left you here!” I assumed I was adopted. One day I saw a true crime show about a baby kidnapped the year I was born. She had a birthmark on her hand. I looked at the mark on my own….” Music and sound design are by Chris Gregory

Fiction
Published: April 16, 2020, 1:05 p.m.

Reactor Meltdown

In an unavoidable turn of events, a professor activates the meltdown sequence on the reactor, and now it's up to him and his assistant to save the city before it's too late. This episode is not explicit. Written and Performed by Kendon Luscher https://www.buzzsprout.com/815707 TRANSCRIPT Professor: Uh-oh Assistant: What is it, Professor? Professor: I may have accidentally triggered the emergency meltdown sequence on the reactor. Assistant: The what? Why would that even be a feature? Professor: There's no time to explain. The only way to deactive it is by telling it your most embarrassing childhood memories while I type in the code. Assistant: Me? Professor: Yes, you! Now Go! Assistant: The time my teacher called on me in geometry... Professor: Not embarrassing enough! Assistant: The time I slipped... Professor: Not embarrassing enough! Assistant: The time I pooped my pants in gym class! Professor: Thank you. The world will remember you as a hero.

Fiction
Published: April 16, 2020, 1 p.m.

Strange Eggs - Caecilian

Caecilians lay strange eggs. This episode is not explicit. Story by PRRP, Music by Mx Michael PRRP is a multi-award-winning podcast that reviews the reviews of its podcast. It’s good! https://www.patreon.com/freckle TRANSCRIPT Caecilians lay translucent eggs. If you’re unfamiliar, these are those weird limbless amphibians, basically snake-frogs, that burrow around underground and in the water, very grossly. Their eggs look like those cats-eye marbles, except with little nasty worms inside in lieu of cool colors. It’s hard to imagine rolling these around as a lo-fi past-time, but if you’re in dire straits... Don’t worry though, because when they hatch, they feast on the skin of their parent in order to grow tenfold in about a week, so it’s not like it gets any worse. Yuck! Caecilians lay strange eggs.

Fiction
Published: April 15, 2020, 2:55 a.m.

Red-winged Blackbird

The Red-winged Blackbird is a well-known species found in marshes, fields, and even in backyards across North America. Hi! My name is Rob. I’m a naturalist and software engineer in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. For a decade I’ve been learning bird identification both by eye and ear, and occasionally leading small group birding outings with the Hamilton Naturalists’ Club. In the last few years I’ve also been recording birdsong, both with my handheld setup (iPhone + mic) and with automated bioacoustic recording devices I’ve built or acquired. Last year I set up the Hamilton Bioacoustics Research Project where we’ve recorded thousands of hours of soundscapes in natural spaces throughout our region. We’ve also devised various methods for volunteers to turn the recordings into observational data. This was a stepping-stone towards the creation of the Songbirding podcast. LINK https://songbirding.com/ @SongbirdingPod on Twitter TRANSCRIPT This is the song of the Red-winged Blackbird. [birdsong]

Fiction
Published: April 15, 2020, 2:50 a.m.

Vet

Me, My Demon, and I created by David Young Written by Faye Fox and David Young Vet is voiced by Victor Valedon https://www.instagram.com/zanvisanto/

Fiction
Published: April 15, 2020, 2:45 a.m.

Ice Rink

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT The first public artificial ice rink, London’s Glaciarium, which opened in 1841, had no ice; you skated on a layer of pig fat, salts, and copper sulfate.  It fell out of favor due to the smell. A mechanically frozen rink was still 36 years away, when inventor John Gamgee repurposed a device he’d made to freeze meat for trans-oceanic shipment. 

Fiction
Published: April 15, 2020, 2:40 a.m.

Thank you from the future from Jamie Ranger

Jamie Ranger from episode 6 of Room season one with a quick thank-you message from the future This episode is not explicit. Written and performed by Aidan Rosewell. https://www.buzzsprout.com/612658/episodes/1775926-room-trailer TRANSCRIPT ...this thing still on...?" I decided I'd do a few of these little messengers..... just thanking all you folks. You know one of my favorite sayings is.... society is great when farmers plant trees....they know only their grandsons will see. So i guess this is kinda like that in reverse that helped the kept the world going back in 2020. God bless you all stay safe and keep washing your hands.

Fiction
Published: April 15, 2020, 2:35 a.m.

Send to Sender - Part 2 of 4

In outer space, technician Shula receives a worrying message from her wife - Néa. What will Shula find on her return? This episode is not explicit. Shula - Kirsty Woolven Computer - Marnie Warner Néa - Tal Minear Written and produced by Kirsty Woolven. Kirsty Woolven is a voice actor from the UK who can be heard in many current and upcoming audio fiction podcasts, like Y2K, The Kingery, Sidequesting and Descendants. Currently, she is creating her first audio drama - Arrivals. https://arrivalspod.carrd.co/ TRANSCRIPT Send to Sender - Part 2 of 4 [Ship engine ambience.] SHULA - Urrggh MATE! This is important! [Shula opens her tool box.] SHULA - I need to go back ASAP - I know Néa’s nervous. [She runs up the stairs.] SHULA - Well, let’s get started then. [Click - door to partition 5 opens.] SHULA - Quick check on partition 5 (Clicks tongue) Yep, safe to shut down. [Shula uses the heavy switch to power partition 5 down.] SHULA - Hopefully, it’s a blown fuse or something. KIRSTY - This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written and produced by Kirsty Woolven, who also voiced Shula. SFX: freeSFX - http://freesfx.co.uk Music: Very Low Note by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4581-very-low-note License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: April 15, 2020, 2:30 a.m.

That Body of Hers

Miss Jenkins doesn't understand why people in her office stare at her. This episode is not explicit. Written by Lee Shackleford, Performed by Karin Heimdahl and Lee Shackleford y2kpod.com, relativitypodcast.com TRANSCRIPT MISS JENKINS I'm telling you the men in this office will not stop staring at me! MR MEANSWELL And I hear you, Miss Jenkins, but you must admit that your -- body -- IS -- extraordinary. MISS JENKINS I dress modestly -- I am careful how I sit and stand -- MR MEANSWELL Yes, but, Miss Jenkins -- we must be realistic. You ARE nearly nine feet tall...! "That Body of Hers" was written by Lee Shackleford and featured Karin Heimdahl of the Y2K Podcast, and Lee Shackleford of RELATIVITY.

Fiction
Published: April 12, 2020, 8:55 p.m.

Ostium Network Recording 2

Steve Chase reporting from the Ostium Network. Written and performed by Alex C. Telander. Creator and writer for the Ostium Podcast, the Circe Podcast, and Writing Walks. http://www.ostiumpodccast.com TRANSCRIPT Okay, I think I’m back. It’s Steve again. The staying at home bit. It really worked. People stopped getting sick, and the world started getting better. It also changed things. For the good. Governments started doing more for their people. Helping those in need. A lot more jobs were done from home on a permanent basis. People talked to each other more. It even . . . Radio Static from Gowlermusic at Freesound.org.

Fiction
Published: April 12, 2020, 8:50 p.m.

Kid Pros: Vinny's Challenge

Written and Produced by Just Press Playhouse Music by Just Press Playhouse Vinny: Orlando Segarra Little Kid: Lindsey Kelly Just Press Playhouse is made up of Orlando Segarra and Gabe Templin. JPP produces Time Trip! and an anthology channel Just Press Playhouse Presents which houses Kid Pros and stand alone episodes such as Lights On in Puerto Rico! Time Trip!: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/time-trip/id1491176296 Kid Pros: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/just-press-playhouse-presents/id1145020758 TRANSCRIPT (Upbeat party music. It's not a wild party and it's not boring it's just eh... A Little Kid walks up to Vinny who is pumping up a balloon. ) VINNY Hi there! Want a balloon sword? LITTLE KID: (obnoxious) You're slow. VINNY Uhh, what? LITTLE KID: I bet I can make one faster than you. VINNY Hey! I can be fast if I— LITTLE KID: Let's race! VINNY I'm not gonna race you, kid. LITTLE KID: Race me so I can stab you with my sword! VINNY You're on! Get ready to taste latex, son! LITTLE KID: (serious) Shut up and pump. (They each grab a balloon and pump. A hush falls over the party.) LITTLE KID: Hurry up, old man! VINNY I'm not old, I'm twenty two! (Squeaks of balloons being twisted. ) LITTLE KID: I win! (Grunts as he thrusts his sword at Vinny. Balloon pops.) VINNY AAAHHHHH!

Fiction
Published: April 12, 2020, 8:45 p.m.

Future You: part 4 of 8

”Hello past me, future you again.” In March and April of 2020, someone is receiving voicemails from… themselves in the future? This episode is not explicit. This story in eight parts was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. FUTURE YOU – Karin Heimdahl COMPUTER – Charlotte Norup To hear more from us, check out audio dramas Y2K and Calling Darkness. https://y2kpod.com/ https://callingdarknesspodcast.libsyn.com/ TRANSCRIPT COMPUTER Voice message, received March 30, 2020. (beep) FUTURE YOU (excited) Hi, it’s you again. Me. You in the future. Yeah. So I think you did something. Right? Things are… a little better. (breathes) You found the list, didn’t you? You and Agavepeach need to mobilize. You… It’s sort of like a heist, right? Or a series of heists. Only online. Always liked a heist movie. (smiles) So go be like- COMPUTER (beep) Message ends. (beat) Message deleted. (beep) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl, who also voiced future you. The computer voice was Charlotte Norup. To hear more from us, check out Y2K and Calling Darkness. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music also from Freesound https://freesound.org/people/Andrewkn/sounds/447511/

Fiction
Published: April 12, 2020, 8:40 p.m.

Handwashing

Written by Kat Walker Shea of Georgie Romero Is Done For Georgie voiced by Socks Whitmore Zabel voiced by Kat Walker Shea Kat Walker Shea and Rachel Greenberg are an LA based Director/Writer team. Kat is the creator of Georgie Romero Is Done For, a horror comedy podcast, and Rachel is the show’s co-director and co-writer. They met as students at CalArts and have worked together ever since. Link: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/georgie-romero-is-done-for/id1485212738 TRANSCRIPT ZABEL: My Witch Box is here! GEORGIE: What’s that? ZABEL: A witch supplies subscription box. Let’s see what I got! [SFX: OPENING CARDBOARD BOX] A peel-off face mask, tarot cards, oh! A hand washing spell! With that pandemic thing going on, this is great! GEORGIE: What does it do? ZABEL: Washes your hands for 20 seconds. GEORGIE: And? ZABEL: That’s it. GEORGIE: Oh. ZABEL: Wanna try it? GEORGIE: Sure! ZABEL: For those of you listening at home, remember to wash your hands! GEORGIE: Who are you talking to? This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Socks Whitmore and Kat Walker Shea of Georgie Romero Is Done For. It was written by Kat Walker Shea of Georgie Romero Is Done For. Sound Effects: freesound.org

Fiction
Published: April 12, 2020, 8:35 p.m.

Is it just me?

Dogs are people too. This episode is made for kids. Written and performed by Isaiah Frizzelle of The Bird Brain Podcast. The Bird Brain Podcast is a unique birdie with a mix of Health and Wellness on Mondays, and Fridays short horror stories on the sub chapter “Night Owl”; Flight or Fright. TRANSCRIPT “Is it just me ?” Written by Isaiah Frizzelle I always start my day with a nice run and there’s one route in particular I take that’s usually pretty empty. Every now and then I see a fellow runner. We give each other the nod… But I stop for dogs. We talk , I learn their names, and age. We both bid each other a safe departure but I never learn the names of the humans… Hopefully I’ll see Roscoe again.  

Fiction
Published: April 12, 2020, 8:30 p.m.

Mutually Assured Happiness

An ex-lover outlines the reasons he left on the back of a postcard. Written by Oscar Garrett, Performed by Jack Same A kid who lived at the Motel Americana in the 1980s with his family... and bugged the rooms. www.motelamericanapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT The following was found written on a postcard sent from the Motel Americana dated May 25th, 1986: Dear Phoebe, By now you’ve realized that I’ve left you and taken everything. The furniture, the jewelry, emptied the bank accounts, the whole kit and kaboodle. I know this may come as a shock but, like everything I’ve done in the past four months, I did it for you. You always say that my happiness is what’s most important to you. But I feel the same way. I hope you’re happy now. Love always and forever, Paul Kevin Macleod

Fiction
Published: April 12, 2020, 8:25 p.m.

A Message from the Admiral

Ahoy there, Oceanologists! This is the Admiral speaking with an important public service announcement. This episode is not explicit. Written by J. Michael DeAngelis. Starring Bob Killion as The Admiral. Bob Killion is the man of many voices on Mission: Rejected, most notably The Admiral, Security Guy, Archie Grant and, of course, Noam Chomsky. https://missionrejected.simplecast.com TRANSCRIPT Good morning, good evening and good afternoon simultaneously. This is The Admiral speaking and I wish to address proper hand washing procedures. First, you must strip yourself of all your worldly desires. Release the fears and hang ups that keep you from being your true self. Second, you must strip yourself of all your clothes. As all Oceanologists know, the hands are the gateway to the body. As we cleanse them, we cleanse our souls. Third, dip your hands in pure bees wax. Don’t use the store brand. DON'T USE THE STORE BRAND. Then scrub vigorously while singing. Baby whale...baby whale... "Baby Whale" Music and Lyrics by Pete Barry

Fiction
Published: April 12, 2020, 8:20 p.m.

Depression

Depression, in a very small nutshell This episode is not explicit. Kate said things. Ignorance Was Bliss is by Kate, a forensic psychologist and crisis clinician who collects stories, in an attempt to figure out how we become who we are. Website: iwbpodcast.com LifeWorld is cohosted by Kate and Derek, and is a look at cybercrime and the methods and personalities behind the use of the Internet as a weapon. Website: https://www.spreaker.com/show/lifeworld iwbpodcast.com and https://www.spreaker.com/show/lifeworld TRANSCRIPT Depression is not feeling sad. It’s not just needing to smile more, or needing distraction. Depression is, more than anything, not feeling anything at all. Just dark, and heavy, and slow, both mentally and physically. You can help by being persistent and present for your loved ones. And if you have it, be gentle with you. You matter.

Fiction
Published: April 12, 2020, 8:15 p.m.

Scout Ship Emissary (Part 2)

The Emissary arrives at Zeta Leporis II and begins exploration there. The card drawn for this episode is the 2 of Hearts This episode is not explicit. Played and performed by Grahame Turner from The Role Less Taken (which usually has way more jokes). This has been an Actual Play of ‘Alone Among the Stars’ by Takuma Okada. therolelesstaken.podbean.com TRANSCRIPT Ship’s log: Captain Weston Bywater of the Scout Ship Emissary. Planet Zeta Leporis II [Dice Roll] Three anomalies. Part 1 of 3 Sensors said the air was breathable, so I stretched my legs. Found was a 6-foot monolith using unusual geometry that made my head hurt. Made from one rock, but with spaces that my fingers could pass through, behind pieces that hung in the air. There was no legible text. This has been an Actual Play of ‘Alone Among the Stars’ by Takuma Okada

Fiction
Published: April 12, 2020, 8:10 p.m.

Kid's Jokes 3

Zoe tells Knock Knock jokes. This episode is made for kids. Written by Mandy Hall, performed by Zoe and Mandy Hall of The Devil Hates Mondays. Mandy Hall is a counselor by day, a podcaster by night, and a nerd all the time. They've worked on Shoebox Podcast and Zoo podcast, and their newest show is The Devil Hates Mondays. Guest appearances by their 6-year old daughter, who enjoys being creepy. TRANSCRIPT Z: Knock knock M: Who's There? Z: Poopyhead. M: Poopyhead who? Z: That's MISTER Poopyhead to you! Z: Knock Knock M: Who's there? Z: Zoe. M: Zoe who? Z: I'M YOUR DAUGHTER! WHY DON'T YOU REMEMBER? You forgot me. This episode of Listen Rinse Repeat was performed by Zoe and Mandy Hall of The Devil Hates Mondays  

Fiction
Published: April 12, 2020, 8:05 p.m.

Sylda Remembers

Sylda remembers the first time she met her fay companion, Squirm, and looks forward to the future. Written and performed by Maddy Searle of The Prickwillow Papers. Maddy Searle (she/her) is a writer, voice actor and audio producer. She is the creator of The Prickwillow Papers, a comedy fantasy audio drama. She is also lead editor on Stellar Firma, an improvised comedy sci-fi podcast from Rusty Quill. You can find her at @maddy_abstract on Twitter. http://theprickwillowpapers.libsyn.com/ TRANSCRIPT Sometimes I think about the day I first met Squirm. I thought my life was so boring, that nothing interesting would ever happen to me. And then, whoops, I saw a swear-y fay woman with a broken wing being chased by a cat, and everything was different. Not your average trip to the pub. I had no idea how many strange, terrifying, ridiculous things would happen. The unknown always used to scare me. Now, I embrace it. I have no idea how tomorrow will turn out. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Fiction
Published: April 12, 2020, 8 p.m.

Third Floor Door

Count to twenty and open the door. Written and performed by Jacqlyn Phillips from Sketches by Zod: The Wedding. Jacqlyn Phillips is a writer, performer, and language teacher. And she washes her hands! https://sketchesbyzod.com/ TRANSCRIPT 1 door sits between 2 windows on the 3rd floor of my 4 story house. 5 shadows pass the windows in rhythmic procession: 6 wings on the first, 7 halos 'round the second, 8 scales of the third a-glint from the 9 auras of the fourth. And the fifth, well, the fifth is 10 to 11 times the size of the 12 rings undulating 13 feet 'round the group entire. I hear 14 knocks and wait 15 seconds before braving the 16 steps toward this 17 foot tall third floor door. 18 pairs of eyes stare back. 19 pairs of gloves. Then, a 20th of something appears in a flash as it all ends in a blur. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written and voiced by Jacqlyn Phillips of the Sketches By Zod podcast. Music: Classic Horror - Madness Paranoia by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution license (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/) Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100471 Artist: http://incompetech.com/ Sound FX from https://www.youtube.com/audiolibrary/

Fiction
Published: April 11, 2020, 3:20 a.m.

Marlboro Man

Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically "nerd-lesque." It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ TRANSCRIPT Marlboro cigarettes were first marketed to women with the slogan “mild as May,” but they didn’t really sell.  They were rebranded as hallmarks of rugged masculinity with the introduction of the Marlboro Man in the 1950’s. The first Marlboro Man didn’t even smoke, but at least 4 actors who have played the character have died of smoking-related diseases. You may now rinse your hands.

Fiction
Published: April 11, 2020, 3:15 a.m.

The President's Big Desk - Penless

A very important bill needs to be signed but where are all the pens? Written by David S. Dear, producer of A Ninth World Journal as the Narrator Featuring: Eric Perry of OZ-9 as President Shaburbur Nikki Richardson of Top of the Round as Matheson David is an Audible Approved Producer produces and performs in numerous audiobooks as well as the audio drama A Ninth World Journal and performs in several other audio dramas. http://ninthworldjournal.com http://davidsdear.com TRANSCRIPT MATHESON President Shaburbur, you really need to get this bill signed! The American people- PRESIDENT SHABURBUR Okay, okay... hey, where are all those fancy signing pens? MATHESON You kept using them to sign the charge slips for pizza delivery. PRESIDENT SHABURBUR Then how did they get the pens? MATHESON Well, you'd ask the "cute ones" to "give you their digits". Then you let them keep the pens. PRESIDENT SHABURBUR Oh yeah. Matheson, I want you to look into each of those delivery people. Make sure they're not in a relationship. MATHESON Sir, just sign the bill. PRESIDENT SHABURBUR Alright already. Hand me your eyeliner pencil. Music is "For the Fallen" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: April 11, 2020, 3 a.m.

We Were Many

Written and voiced by Mike and Arianna Atchley of Dice Tower Theatre. www.DiceTowerTheatre.com TRANSCRIPT A dry wind whipped up dust about my feet as I walked alone. I thought I heard a voice Hey Grandpa. Can you tell me about when you were in the great army? Yes, yes of course, Covi. That smell. The sickening smell of chamomile and honey. Its when I lost you… when I lost all of you. “Giggle, i must go again grandpa. Goodbye…” Don’t leave me. Am I the last one left upon this sterile and clean landscape? Wait… is that a weed growing through the pavement? *sniff* Is that… chamomile? No… that song… it sounds stronger that's impossible!!? Not the flood again! NOOOOOOOO!!!!!! This episode of Listen Rinse Repeat is Written and voiced by Mike and Arianna Atchley of Dice Tower Theatre.

Fiction
Published: April 11, 2020, 2:50 a.m.

The Shortest Adventure Ever

Written by Kennedy Phillips of Magus Elgar. Raised on a Sailboat for a good portion of his life, Kennedy entertained, improvising commercials telling stories other vessels out at sea, much to the joy of his family. When it was time to live on land, his love for being a storyteller only worsened. With a Master's Degree from Chapman University and nearly 7 years of professional experience, he hopes entertain the world with his stupid, stupid ideas. He's worked as a sound designer for Hazbin Hotel, Satina, Mayhem, and many many more. But his crowning achievement is with his own podcast series Magus Elgar. Kennedy lives in the los angeles area as a freelance sound designer, trying to offer his services while staving off his insatiable drive to tell stories. https://www.maguselgar.com/ TRANSCRIPT INT. COTTAGE, DAY NARRATOR This is the tale of a young hero. Bag lifting up. Sword sharpening. NARRATOR (CONT’D) He’s heard the call to adventure, and will heed its cry to save the world! Door opens, marching out. NARRATOR (CONT’D) It will be perilous, but with a brave heart, he will be forever remembered as The hero trips and screams as he falls down a cliff. NARRATOR (CONT’D) Oh dear. It appears he fell into the ravine..... And so ends the tale of...whoever that was. Hardly seems important now.

Fiction
Published: April 11, 2020, 2:40 a.m.

Warren G. Harding

Brick buys a souvenir for Rose. This episode is not explicit. Voiced by Paul Eenhoorn and Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila. www.brokenalaskapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Warren G. Harding. Brick, before you hang up, I have to say, I can’t believe you bought me this Warren G. Harding writing journal today. Well, that journal is special. Because it has his face on the cover and he was the first president to visit Alaska? On the boat trip back home after visiting Alaska, he died, and his wife ordered his body embalmed just an hour after his death, forbidding an autopsy. Are you suggesting foul play? Don’t know. But his wife knew he was having affairs. This journal has excerpts of the love letters he wrote to his girlfriends. “Jerry … told me to say that if he could have but one wish, it would be to be held in your darling embrace.” Jerry? Wait, did Harding refer to his… as Jerry? He did. Ew. Presidents are the worst. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Paul Eenhoorn and Kari Aguila of “Broken, Alaska” and written by Kari Aguila.

Fiction
Published: April 11, 2020, 2:30 a.m.

Truth or Dare

Apologies to the marching band.... especially the piccolo. This episode is not explicit. Written by Shannon Perry and performed by June Clark Eubanks, both of Oz 9. June Clark Eubanks (the glorious Glenda/Albatros of Oz 9) is an accomplished actor and director, having recently directed the hugely popular production Machinal at the Parkland Theatre Second Stage and Urbana-Champaign Independent Media Center. @oz9TheAlbatros Shannon Perry writes stuff. Just... not bios. @oz9Olivia https://oz-9.com TRANSCRIPT Streaking bare-bummed and front “flags” waving across a football field, in front of a homecoming crowd, ducking trombones and clarinets and who the hell put a tiny piccolo player in the middle of the color guard? “Sorry!” Was NOT her idea. Next time, she’d choose “truth.” If she ever played with Grandma again…. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by June Clark Eubanks and written by Shannon Perry of Oz 9.

Fiction
Published: April 9, 2020, 3:50 a.m.

Air of Mystery

Your vacation adventure doesn't have to start when the plane touches down. This episode is not explicit. Voiced by Cap Blackard, Eleanor Edwards, Oral Frier, and Allison Haaland and was written and produced by Cap Blackard Cap Blackard is a multidisciplinary artist specializing in writing, illustration, and podcasting. She's the showrunner of the award-winning audio drama, The Call of Cthulhu Mystery Program, a queer horror-comedy; co-creator the forthcoming animated series, Lightning Dogs; and is Mother Brain of Omniverse, her media company focused on storytelling podcasts. Her forthcoming series, TRANScend is a genre-bending autobiography exploring her transgender journey and the interconnectedness of all things. https://cthulhumystery.com https://omniverse.media TRANSCRIPT [Adventure music plays] ANNOUNCER: Soar into adventure and intrigue with “Air of Mystery” - The world's first combination airline and escape room. No more boring flights and cramped seats, on Air of Mystery, before you even touch down in your favorite travel destinations, you're whisked away to exotic locales like The Mansion of the Arcane, The Crypt of Muldoon, or Green Beard's Secret Cove. [Jungle noises] TEMPLE GUARD: Put your tray tables up, and your seat backs in the DEAD position. Ho-ho-ho-ho! ANNOUNCER: While your ears are popping, you'll be popping locks as you decode ancient secrets, and discover hidden clues. But these complex riddles can't be solved alone - you'll have to work together with your fellow passengers if you want to find the treasure and make it out alive. WOMAN: It's a color matching puzzle – put the green gem in the sarcophagus! MAN: No! These hieroglyphs say that depressurizes the cabin NERDY MAN: According to the professor's journal you just have to place it here and... voila! [A stone clicks into place and a heavy door opens] ANNOUNCER: Passengers 10 and under won't be left out of the excitement. Our cabins are now outfitted with Air Force FUN – a supervised, interactive play area CHILD: Get off my plane! ANNOUNCER: Air of Mystery - departing daily with flights to New York, Orlando, Chicago, and San Juan. The Pirates by Jon Wright licensed via Melody Loop

Fiction
Published: April 9, 2020, 3:40 a.m.

Send to Sending - Part 1 of 4

In outer space, technician Shula receives a worrying message from her wife - Néa. What will Shula find on her return? This episode is not explicit. Shula - Kirsty Woolven Computer - Marnie Warner Written and produced by Kirsty Woolven. Kirsty Woolven is a voice actor from the UK who can be heard in many current and upcoming audio fiction podcasts, like Y2K, The Kingery, Sidequesting and Descendants. Currently, she is creating her first audio drama - Arrivals. Marnie is a voice actor who can currently be heard in Smoke & Mirrors, Finding Atlas (To Have & To Hold), and an upcoming episode of The Pilgrimage Saga. (https://arrivalspod.carrd.co/) TRANSCRIPT Send to Sender - Part 1 of 4 [Ship engine ambience] SHULA - Open ship's log. [Beep] SHULA - Timepoint 27 Whiskey Mike 0005. Still searching, still nothing. With your permission, I would like to return within 24 hours - it's just that it's very close for Néa and me. End log. [Beep] Shula - Computer… [Computer beeps] SHULA - …send log - authorisation: Sierra Hotel Uniform Lemur Alpha - Shula. COMPUTER [in error state] - Unable to proceed - error in partition five. KIRSTY - This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written and produced by Kirsty Woolven, who also voiced Shula. The Computer was voiced by Marnie Warner. SFX: freeSFX - http://freesfx.co.uk Music: Very Low Note by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4581-very-low-note License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: April 9, 2020, 3:30 a.m.

Bile

Me, My Demon, and I created by David Young Written by Faye Fox and David Young Bilé is voiced by Faye Fox https://twitter.com/FayeFox_16

Fiction
Published: April 9, 2020, 3:20 a.m.

24/7

Written by Charlotte O’Farell Voice : Joy Hayward Music and Sound Design : Chris Gregory Alternative Stories and Fake Realities is an anthology podcast producing audio drama, short fiction and poetry using writers and actors from both sides of the Atlantic from its base right in the middle of England. You can find us by searching alternative stories in your favourite podcast app or clicking on https://www.buzzsprout.com/411730 We’re social on twitter https://twitter.com/StoriesAlt And Instagram https://www.instagram.com/stories.alt/ Email: office@alternativestories.com Charlotte O’Farrell is a horror writer. A lifelong fan of the genre, she aims to share her love of the weird and wonderful with her readers. Her stories have appeared in 25 anthologies. She writes daily flash fiction on Twitter. @ChaOFarrell and always enjoys interacting with her readers. She lives in Nottingham with her husband, daughter and cat. https://www.amazon.com/Charlotte-OFarrell/e/B07SBKX1G6?ref=dbs_p_ebk_w0m_abau_000000 Joy Hayward is a prolific voice actor and member of the Alternative Stories team. TRANSCRIPT “After 8 years of quarantine we had our solution: transplanting brains into robotic bodies. A robot doesn’t get sick. At last we could leave home. But the company that made them didn’t tell us we wouldn’t control our new metallic bodies. We work 24 / 7 and can’t stop.” Music and sound design are by Chris Gregory

Fiction
Published: April 9, 2020, 3:10 a.m.

Strangers in Strange Places: Part 1

Rion helps their friend Sable find a missing scarf. This episode is made for kids. This episode was written and produced by Tal Minear. Basil was voiced by Sable Smith and Rion was voiced by Tal Minear. Tal is a podcaster, voice actor, and sound designer with too many passions and too little time. A Mechanical Engineer by daytime, they can be found working on audio fiction by night. Tal is the writer and producer for Sidequesting as well as the co-creator of Light Hearts and Ungifts. They enjoy voice acting in other productions, including Novitero, Sector Ø, and Witches of the City. Check out Tal's work at https://sidequesting.carrd.co/ Check out Sable's work at https://www.tiktok.com/@sableliciousbaby TRANSCRIPT INTRO: Strangers in Strange Places, Part 1 of 5 BASIL: Thank you for coming, Rion! I’m missing my favorite scarf again, and I can’t find it anywhere. RION: It’s no problem at all, Basil. It’s not the scarf you’re wearing right now, is it? BASIL: Oh no, this is my backup scarf. RION: I should have known. Oh, it’s also not the one on your cat? BASIL: [confused] There it is!! But… I don’t have a cat. [SFX: Cat meow] CREDITS: This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written and produced by Tal Minear. Basil was voiced by Sable Smith and Rion was voiced by Tal Minear.

Fiction
Published: April 9, 2020, 3 a.m.

Strange Eggs - Ant

Ants lay strange eggs. This episode is not explicit. Story by Kenneth Eckle, Music by Mx Michael https://www.patreon.com/freckle TRANSCRIPT Ants lay too many eggs. We all know and love ants; they fight with grasshoppers about seasons. But did you also know that when an ant becomes the queen of a new colony, it will lay THOUSANDS of eggs a day? Not only that, but it has to choose the sex of every single one! That’s a lot of decision-making! If she chooses to fertilize an egg, it becomes a female worker ant; all the unfertilized eggs become male sex slaves. In the queen’s entire, and what must be dull, lifetime, it will lay about a third of a million eggs! That’s more eggs than stars in the sky, I bet. Finally, in an act of unbridled sadism, she also determines which of the eggs will become their own future queens, thereby subjecting them to the same endless and frankly bizarre cycle of lifelong torture. Ants lay strange eggs. Mx Michael

Fiction
Published: April 7, 2020, 2:55 a.m.

Scout Ship Emissary Part 1

While on an exploration mission, Captain Weston Bywater explores an anomaly on Planet Nu Vespae III. The card drawn for this episode was the Eight of Hearts. This episode is not explicit. Played, written, and performed by Grahame Turner. Scout Ship Emissary is an Actual Play of ‘Alone Among the Stars’ by Takuma Okada, available at https://noroadhome.itch.io/. Grahame fell deep into an Actual Play Podcast hole, where he found that he really wanted to start one of his own. He can usually be found hanging out in the CastJunkie Discord server. In his less-free time, he's a technical editor. Podcasting has not helped with this. He lives in Boston with his partner and co-host on The Role Less Taken, as well as their two cats, Peanut and Edmund "Fitz" Fitzgerald. https://therolelesstaken.podbean.com/ TRANSCRIPT This is the log of Captain Weston Bywater of the Scout Ship Emissary, on an exploration mission to chart new worlds and document new phenomena. Alone among the stars, I am the first human to set eyes on any of these worlds. Planet: Nu Vespae III [Dice rolls] One Anomaly While scanning the planet’s north pole, I notice a massive metal obelisk jutting at an odd angle from the ice cap. Constructed. The size of a large starship, but internal scans show that it was packed with fuel and, ah, explosives. An unexploded missile from a long-forgotten war. This has been an Actual Play of ‘Alone Among the Stars’ by Takuma Okada Music in this series taken from the GameDevMarket Humble Sound Effects and Music Pack, and is under license from GameDevMarket. (I'm not really sure if I need to credit it as a result, but better safe than sorry).

Fiction
Published: April 7, 2020, 2:50 a.m.

Survival

SURVIVAL written by Lee Shackleford of Relativity. Performed by Clarence Brown, Lee Shackleford, and Kyle Jones, all from the DISCUSSING WHO podcast. www.relativitypodcast.com www.discussingwho.com. TRANSCRIPT CAPTAIN: Into the lifeboat, gentlemen. I’m afraid our ship has had it. LIEUTENANT: Yes, sir. I’ll man the tiller — Jenkins, you man the oars. JENKINS: Right, sir. Is it, uh, too soon to ask when we might eat, sir? CAPTAIN: When we might WHAT? JENKINS: Well, it helps to know these things, sir. CAPTAIN: Our ship has just gone down, Jenkins, with massive loss of life! LIEUTENANT: And now we’re stranded in a lifeboat, miles from anywhere! JENKINS: I know, sir, it’s just that I skipped breakfast. Stupid of me, I know, sir. LIEUTENANT: That WAS bloody stupid, Jenkins! Don’t you know breakfast is the most important meal of the day? JENKINS: I know that now, sir. Won’t make that mistake again, sir. Not me. THIS WAS “SURVIVAL” — featuring Clarence Brown, Lee Shackleford, and Kyle Jones, all from the DISCUSSING WHO podcast. www.discussingwho.com.

Fiction
Published: April 7, 2020, 2:45 a.m.

Future You: Part 3 of 8

”Hello past me, future you again.” In March and April of 2020, someone is receiving voicemails from… themselves in the future? This episode is not explicit. This story in eight parts was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. FUTURE YOU – Karin Heimdahl COMPUTER – Charlotte Norup To hear more from us, check out audio dramas Y2K and Calling Darkness. https://y2kpod.com/ https://callingdarknesspodcast.libsyn.com/ TRANSCRIPT COMPUTER Voice message, received March 27, 2020. (beep) FUTURE YOU (stressed and scared) Hi, me, you, future me, no you, anyway. No time – you need to know – while everyone’s so preoccupied with that horrible pandemic, behind the scenes, people in power – evil people - are pushing through legislation worldwide – really dangerous legislation – and you have to stop them. Agavepeach knows how to find the list. They- COMPUTER (beep) Message ends. (beat) Message deleted. (beep) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl, who also voiced future you. The computer voice was Charlotte Norup. To hear more from us, check out Y2K and Calling Darkness. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music also from Freesound https://freesound.org/people/Andrewkn/sounds/447511/

Fiction
Published: April 7, 2020, 2:40 a.m.

Words of Advice

Words of advice from Jack's old pal Ahab Cloud. Written by Ahab Cloud, Performed by Jack Same Ahab was an old college buddy of Jack's. www.motelamericanapodcast.com TRANSCRIPT The following was found written on a postcard sent from the Motel Americana, undated: Dear Jack, Some words of advice from the open road: Squeeze that fish too tight and it’ll slip right out of your hands. Chad. Never trust a chad. Whenever possible work at the intersection of all intersections. Schedule all the real, real dirty work for the Friday before Easter. Salad will kill you more slowly than red meat, increasing the possibility for painful illness or depression due to the loss of friends and family and everything that brought one comfort in the old world. Best to the Family, A. Cloud www.motelamericanapodcast.com

Fiction
Published: April 7, 2020, 2:35 a.m.

Ostium Network Recording 1

Steve Chase reporting from the Ostium Network. Written and performed by Alex C. Telander. Creator and writer for the Ostium Podcast, the Circe Podcast, and Writing Walks. http://www.ostiumpodcast.com TRANSCRIPT Hi, if you’re listening to this, my name’s Steve Chase, from the Ostium Network. Look, I found out something about the year 2020. That was the year the pandemic hit. Sounds horrible. Changed the world forever. But it looks like it also brought everyone closer. They all worked together to prevent others from getting sick. And it worked. It took a while, but it worked. Radio Static from Gowlermusic at Freesound.org.

Fiction
Published: April 7, 2020, 2:30 a.m.

Longest Word

Written and voiced by Moxie LaBouche of Your Brain on Facts podcast. @BrainOnFactspod http://yourbrainonfacts.com/ Before she started the Your Brain On Facts podcast to safely vent the copious bonus facts in her brain, Moxie LaBouche performed and produced burlesque, specifically “nerd-lesque.” It was her privilege to produce the only George R. R. Martin-approved burlesque tribute to Game of Thrones and even to play for the man himself. Moxie has presented a local TED talk, is the prolific author of unfinished fiction, knows seven words of Latin, and previously earned her living as a goat farmer and soap maker. She is also the creator and co-host of the Science With Savannah, Age 7 podcast and YouTube channel. Moxie lives in Virginia with her husband and a dozen or so pets. Your Brain on Facts is a half-hour podcast of things you didn’t know, things you thought you knew, and things you never knew you never knew, covering topics as diverse as science-fiction, funerals, food origins, heroic animals, and the strategic butter reserve. TRANSCRIPT: Oh, HELL no. You're on your own with this one. 

Fiction
Published: April 4, 2020, 8:35 p.m.

Bagels & Brunettes: Mistakeout

Kennedy and Johnsonivowitz are on an intense stakeout, but someone makes a mistake... Written by David S. Dear, producer of A Ninth World Journal as the Narrator Featuring: Shannon Perry of Oz 9 as Kennedy https://oz-9.com Karin Heimdahl, producer of Y2K as Johnsonivowitz https://y2kpod.com Kyle Jones, producer of Discussing Network as the Chief https://www.discussingnetwork.com David is an Audible Approved Producer produces and performs in numerous audiobooks as well as the audio drama A Ninth World Journal and performs in several other audio dramas. http://ninthworldjournal.com http://davidsdear.com https://oz-9.com https://y2kpod.com https://www.discussingnetwork.com BAGELS AND BRUNETTES - MISTAKEOUT NARRATOR Previously on Bagels and Brunettes... KENNEDY Johnsonivowitz, wake up! JOHNSONIVOWITZ Hrmh? KENNEDY Sven Gomez is coming out of the building. JOHNSONIVOWITZ (sleepily) That's not Sven Gomez. Sven Gomez has a mustache. KENNEDY Like he can't just shave off his mustache... JOHNSONIVOWITZ I'm telling you that ain't him. KENNEDY You just want to go back to sleep, don't you? JOHNSONIVOWITZ Just ten more minutes...

Fiction
Published: April 4, 2020, 8:25 p.m.

Bad Gladiator: You Filthy Beast

Written and performed by members of The Scene Shop, an online comedy writing guild. (https://www.sceneshop.us/)  Twitter: @sceneshopshop Click to access the transcript here 

Fiction
Published: April 4, 2020, 8:15 p.m.

Zoe tells knock knock jokes 2

Zoe tells Knock Knock jokes. Written by Mandy Hall, performed by Zoe and Many Hall of The Devil Hates Mondays. Mandy Hall is a counselor by day, a podcaster by night, and a nerd all the time. They've worked on Shoebox Podcast and Zoo podcast, and their newest show is The Devil Hates Mondays. Guest appearances by their 6-year old daughter, who enjoys being creepy. TRANSCRIPT Z: Knock Knock M: Who's There? Z: Doctor. M: Doctor Who? Z: I love that show! Z: Knock knock M: Who's there? Z: Earth. M: Earth who? Z: EARTH IS OVERRUN WITH ALIENS! M: Oh no, Earth is overrun with aliens! Oh no! This episode of Listen Rinse Repeat was performed by Zoe and Mandy Hall of The Devil Hates Mondays. 

Fiction
Published: April 4, 2020, 8:10 p.m.

Dark-eyed Junco

The Dark-eyed Junco is known to many in North America as a winter bird. They have a rattle-like trill as a song, which is heard usually in early spring just before they return to the far north and alpine regions for breeding. Hi! My name is Rob. I’m a naturalist and software engineer in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. For a decade I’ve been learning bird identification both by eye and ear, and occasionally leading small group birding outings with the Hamilton Naturalists’ Club. In the last few years I’ve also been recording birdsong, both with my handheld setup (iPhone + mic) and with automated bioacoustic recording devices I’ve built or acquired. Last year I set up the Hamilton Bioacoustics Research Project where we’ve recorded thousands of hours of soundscapes in natural spaces throughout our region. We’ve also devised various methods for volunteers to turn the recordings into observational data. This was a stepping-stone towards the creation of the Songbirding podcast. LINK https://songbirding.com/ @SongbirdingPod on Twitter TRANSCRIPT This is the song of the Dark-eyed Junco. [birdsong]

Fiction
Published: April 4, 2020, 8:05 p.m.

Johnny

Me, My Demon, and I created by David Young Written by Faye Fox and David Young Johnny is voiced by Adam Lloyd https://twitter.com/HorseMorsel Johnny: [sigh] Hey, guys, it's Johnny here from Me, My Demon, and I. Guys, I really need you to wash your hands properly. You all might have health care and jobs and shit, but some of us don't. YES, I got fired again. Just don't rub it in. But if you are going to rub it in, rub it in like you would soap into your hands: thoroughly and with hot water. Just, please, don't be selfish for like, once in your life. Anyway, use soap, stay safe, stay inside, stay alive. I ... think that's the moral of the story?

Fiction
Published: April 4, 2020, 8 p.m.

A Surprising Spring

A Surprising Spring A pair of soldiers make their way through the woods. Written and performed by Gregory Bratton from Inspector Virlo Morton Lee https://ivml.podbean.com/ Gregory Bratton is a songwriter, recording artist, and the creator of the podcast, Inspector Virlo Morton Lee. TRANSCRIPT TRAVELER I wasn’t expecting to find water so far inland. We are very lucky. What did you have left? A day’s worth, like me? Mountain spring - clean and cold. We can fill these canteens, clean this grime from our hands, sit down and replan the remainder of the mission. I’ve been doing this awhile, son. I’ve got 2 days in me max over this terrain without water. Do you know how vital this intel is? We’re 4 days from the extraction point. So, you just keep washing those hands, fill up these canteens, and do the math. ANNOUNCER This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written by Gregory Bratton from Inspector Virlo Morton Lee and voiced by the same. Music by Chip Michael Sound FX from https://freesound.org/ Creative Commons 0

Fiction
Published: April 3, 2020, 3:05 a.m.

Plans

Written and Narrated by Robert Chauncey Produced by Haunted Griffin Entertainment for Listen Rinse Repeat For more information: Haunted Griffin Entertainment Website: http://www.hauntedgriffin.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HauntedGriffinEntertainment Twitter: @hauntedgriffin Discord: https://discord.gg/pavBrXK Tunnels Twitter: @TunnelsPodcast https://tunnelspodcast.libsyn.com/rss Haunted Hell House of Horror Twitter: @hhhohpod https://hhhohpod.libsyn.com/rss Marigold’s Ghosts https://marigoldsghosts.libsyn.com/rss TRANSCRIPT I planned for everything. Everything. The poison was deadly, but that was only in larger doses. In smaller doses, it just put you to sleep. Fast asleep, and it kept you asleep. The fire would take care of the rest. What I didn’t plan for was you being such an utter bastard that you would kiss me before you fell out. I tried to get out, but I’m so, so tired, and the fire is getting brighter and brighter. I can feel my face getting hotter, but my eyes, they just won’t stay... Written and Narrated by Robert Chauncey Produced by Haunted Griffin Entertainment for Listen Rinse Repeat

Fiction
Published: April 3, 2020, 2:55 a.m.

Bloody Pissed Off Mary

Remember this challenge from when you were a kid? Stand in a dark bathroom, face the mirror, and voice her name three times.... Written by Shannon Perry Voice Acted by Aaron Clark You may recognize Aaron as the sometimes-goofy, sometimes-homicidal, always-creepy le Bichon Frise of Oz 9.  Michael stood in front of the bathroom mirror. “Bloody Mary” he said, in the dim, flickering light of the candle. “Bloody Mary.” His hand trembled, the candle nearly falling into the sink. He closed his eyes “Bloody Mary.”  He opened his eyes: She was there! Deathly pale and terrible! He turned to run, but she reached out and grabbed his shirt. “Don’t you wash the news?” she shrieked. “Wash your damn hands!” 

Fiction
Published: April 3, 2020, 2:50 a.m.

Ken Burns Quarantine: Part 3

Produced by John and Faith Dowgin of the Mission: Rejected podcast. John P. Dowgin is a published playwright and screenwriter currently residing in New Jersey. His screenplay 'Mile 42' was a finalist at the '17 Austin Film Festival. John also co-created the comedy podcast 'Mission: Rejected' (@MissionRejected on Twitter) with his partners at The Porch Room, an independent production company whose works have been performed on three continents. A number of their plays have been published by Samuel French as part of the compilation 'Accidents Happen'. TRANSCRIPT ANNOUNCER: PBS proudly presents, Ken Burns ‘Quarantine’ Dearest Eulabelle Hope fades with my battery meter. I cannot complete French, level 2 idioms, in the time allotted, and shall lose not only precious lingots, but my belov'd streak. The damn'd owl mocks me with his smile and premium content outfits. I despair. Yours, Ambrose ANNOUNCER: Produced by John and Faith Dowgin of the Mission: Rejected podcast.

Fiction
Published: April 3, 2020, 2:45 a.m.

Time Trip!: Lacoste Cove

Written and Produced by Gabe Templin and Orlando Segarra of Just Press Playhouse Music by The Brooklyn Bystander Trip: Gabe Templin Milo: Orlando Segarra Just Press Playhouse is made up of Orlando Segarra and Gabe Templin. JPP produces Time Trip! and an anthology channel Just Press Playhouse Presents which houses Kid Pros and stand alone episodes such as Lights On in Puerto Rico! Time Trip!: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/time-trip/id1491176296 Kid Pros: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/just-press-playhouse-presents/id1145020758 LACOSTE COVE  (Adventure music. Water splashing. Crocodiles  snapping. )  WATCH BEEPS  TRIP Doctor Bitterman! ...Where could she be?  CROC GROWLS  MILO (Through Communicator ) Um... Hello?  TRIP Milo! Where's Doctor Bitterman?  MILO She's uh... Getting a snack… TRIP A snack! I'm about to be Crock Kibble!  MILO Uh... can I help you?  TRIP Get me out of here!  MILO Did you press the buttons?  TRIP Yes! It's not working!  MILO Try doing a hard reset. Hold the red and blue buttons  down for three seconds…  BEEPS FOLLOWED BY A CLOSE SNAP  TRIP WHOA! That was a close one….  SUB BASS BOOM  TRIP It worked! You did it Milo!  MILO Duh…  ZWIP!  CHOMP 

Fiction
Published: April 3, 2020, 2:40 a.m.

Bagels and Brunettes: Smoke Em If You Got Em

Written by David S. Dear, producer of A Ninth World Journal as the Narrator https://ninthworldjournal.com Featuring: Shannon Perry of Oz 9 as Kennedy https://oz-9.com Karin Heimdahl, producer of Y2K as Johnsonivowitz https://y2kpod.com Kyle Jones, producer of Discussing Network as the Chief https://www.discussingnetwork.com TRANSCRIPT NARRATOR Last time on Bagels and Brunettes... CHIEF (speaking as if a cigarette is in his mouth) Kennedy and Johnsonivowitz, your case loads are falling way behind. You need to KENNEDY Are you smoking, Chief? I thought you quit smoking... CHIEF I did, but you know... JOHNSONIVOWITZ Did you take that pack of cigarettes out of the evidence bag? CHIEF You have no idea how hard it is to quit, Johnsonivowitz. KENNEDY Hey Chief, can I bum one of those off of you? Music is "Hot Pursuit" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: April 3, 2020, 2:30 a.m.

Ken Burns' 'Quarantine' Part 2

John P. Dowgin is a published playwright and screenwriter currently residing in New Jersey. His screenplay 'Mile 42' was a finalist at the '17 Austin Film Festival. John also co-created the comedy podcast 'Mission: Rejected' (@MissionRejected on Twitter) with his partners at The Porch Room, an independent production company whose works have been performed on three continents. A number of their plays have been published by Samuel French as part of the compilation 'Accidents Happen'.  ANNOUNCER: PBS proudly presents, Ken Burns ‘Quarantine’  Dearest Eulabelle  The reckoning has come. The damn'd Stop n Shop rebels have fortified positions near the Charmin, but in their fatigue, have failed to defended the 'As Seen on TV' endcap. Shamwows will be their undoing. We ride at dawn.  Yours, Ambrose  ANNOUNCER: Produced by John and Faith Dowgin of the Mission: Rejected podcast.   

Fiction
Published: March 31, 2020, 7:33 p.m.

Future you: Part 2 of 8

Show notes - Future You ”Hello past me, future you again.” In March and April of 2020, someone is receiving voicemails from… themselves in the future? This story in eight parts was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. FUTURE YOU – Karin Heimdahl COMPUTER – Charlotte Norup To hear more from us, check out audio dramas Y2K and Calling Darkness. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Credits music also from Freesound. Future You - part 2 of 8 COMPUTER Voice message, received March 21, 2020. (beep) FUTURE YOU (rushed) Hi, it’s me again. Future you again. Right. So I know you’re - I’m - in a really weird place right now, everything shut down, and… Yeah. But at least you have time. You need to contact someone – their user name on twitter is something like agavepeach67 or possibly 76. You both know- (gasp, scared) Have to run! COMPUTER (beep) Message ends. (beat) Message deleted. (beep) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl, who also voiced future you. The computer voice was Charlotte Norup. To hear more from us, check out Y2K and Calling Darkness.

Fiction
Published: March 31, 2020, 7:28 p.m.

I scream you scream

A freezer opening-up, the hum fills the air while MARK shifts things around looking for something to eat. MARK Hmmm...Frozen spinach, frozen spinach, frozen spinach…(scoff) I just want a snack, is that too much to ask! A voice suddenly is heard. It is sensual and ominous. VOICE What about me Mark? MARK What?! Who said that? VOICE Over here, behind the chopped spinach. Shifts the bag MARK The regular Ice Cream I bought on accident? ICE CREAM Yes, Mark. it’s me. I’ve been waiting for you. MARK But...but I’m lactose intolerant. ICE CREAM It’s okay, I won’t tell. MARK No! ICE CREAM (whispers) Spoon me MARK NEVER! ICE CREAM SPOON ME! Mark and the Ice Cream both scream at each other. Cut to the hall closet door opening. ALEX Mark?! What happened to all the toilet paper? MARK Uhhhhh…. This episode was produced by David Magadan of ​Directive, ​ with additional voices from Mia Passarella and Fernando Perez.

Fiction
Published: March 31, 2020, 7:23 p.m.

The New Witch

CREDITS: Eddie Louise is writer, co-producer, and the voice of Sage in THE TALES OF SAGE AND SAVANT. Find them on Twitter @SageAndSavant or at www.SageAndSavant.com    NEW WITCH  Written & Performed by Eddie Louise  Her rage was an incandescent heat, sparking from the ends of her hair and fingertips. Overhead, storm clouds filled the sky, their purple bellies bruised and swollen. Katya leaned into the wind, relishing the lash of icy air, the whip-sting of sleet punishing away her tears. Gone was the softness that beckoned in the marriage bed, the silken skin that called to a lover. In its place, a mask of white porcelain, seamless and without expression. She lifted arms that held nothing of the supplicant and began to chant. 

Fiction
Published: March 31, 2020, 7:18 p.m.

The River Stole the Gods: Part 1

BIO   Pete Barry is a co-creator of the audio comedy Mission: Rejected. He is an award-winning screenwriter, playwright, actor, director and musician. He was named a 2013 Young and Hungry List writer, and Sony Pictures is currently developing his screenplay Marian.  His short plays have been published in numerous collections, and his production of Accidents Happen won the 2009 NJACT Perry Award for Outstanding Production of an Original Play. His short play Drop was a winner in the 34th Annual Samuel French Off-Off Broadway Festival.   He is a cofounder of the Porch Room, a film and theater production company, with whom he has produced numerous shows in the Philadelphia and New York International Fringe Festivals.  Part 1 The Sage: Kobold theatre presents...The river stole the gods. Kobold Priest: The river stole the gods. Kobold Acolyte: You mean, the little statues? Kobold Priest: THE GODS! Kobold Acolyte: You mean, you dropped them in the river? Kobold Priest: We will say...they run away. Kobold Acolyte: Nobody believe that. Kobold Priest: We will say...they swim away. Kobold Acolyte: They made of wood. Kobold Priest: Right, so that means they swim. Kobold Acolyte: You mean float? Kobold Priest: Swim. Kobold Acolyte: Float. Kobold Priest: Swim. Kobold Acolyte: Float. Kobold Priest: Same difference. Kobold Acolyte: Maybe WE ought to swim away. Kobold Priest: I not able to swim. Kobold Acolyte: Me neither. ... Kobold Acolyte: We in in big trouble. Created by: Pete Barry River by: cagancelik

Fiction
Published: March 31, 2020, 7:13 p.m.

Sadie

Me, My Demon, and I created by David Young Written by Faye Fox and David Young Sadie is voiced by Claudia Vecci https://claudyview.com/

Fiction
Published: March 31, 2020, 7:08 p.m.

Sea Terrors Part 5: Reiteration

Mike Gagne is a full time Coastie, a full time podcaster (almost), a husband, and a father of three.  Boston Harbor Horror Libsyn Feed: https://bostonhorror.libsyn.com/rss  Sea Terrors, Parts One through Five, were written, produced and voice acted by Mike Gagne of Asylum 94 Productions, home of Boston Harbor Horror.  EXT, NIGHT: BRIDGE OF A SHIP SOUNDS: Oceanic ambiance UNRELIABLE NARRATOR I see the light of a ship in the distance. I force myself forward, sluggish in my movements as the sea tries to hold me back. I push harder, faster, as the red side light becomes brighter with the closing distance. The white hull gleams in the soft moonlight - I will be on their bridge in moments! I increase my speed, timing it just right to meet my redemption, my salvation! The stars brighten as I come closer to my goal. Except, now I know salvation will not be mine. Time seems to slow to a crawl as I enter the bridge - and see myself reaching for the alarm.

Fiction
Published: March 31, 2020, 7:03 p.m.

The President's Big Desk - Bezgurmeknetstan

The president receives a visit from the ambassador from Bezgurmeknetstan. Written by David S. Dear, producer of A Ninth World Journal as the Narrator Featuring: Eric Perry of OZ-9 as President Shaburbur Nikki Richardson of Top of the Round as Matheson Transcript: THE PRESIDENT'S BIG DESK - BEZGURMEKNETSTAN MATHESON Mr. President, the ambassador from Bezgurmeknetstan is here to discuss the trade agreement. PRESIDENT SHABURBUR From Burkmanistan? MATHESON Bezgurmeknetstan. PRESIDENT SHABURBUR Brankanderstan- MATHESON Bezgurmeknetstan. PRESIDENT SHABURBUR Okay, send in the ambassador from Purmonistan. MATHESON (sighs) Bezgurmeknetstan. PRESIDENT SHABURBUR Beztra- Benzur- Brogra- ...never mind. Just nuke the country. Music is "For the Fallen" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: March 31, 2020, 6:58 p.m.

Home from Work

Home from Work by Robert Chauncey Credits Written and Narrated by Robert Chauncey Produced by Haunted Griffin Entertainment for Listen Rinse Repeat For more information Haunted Griffin Entertainment Website: ​http://www.hauntedgriffin.com Facebook: ​https://www.facebook.com/HauntedGriffinEntertainment Twitter: @hauntedgriffin Discord: ​https://discord.gg/pavBrXK Tunnels Twitter: @TunnelsPodcast https://tunnelspodcast.libsyn.com/rss Haunted Hell House of Horror Twitter: @hhhohpod https://hhhohpod.libsyn.com/rss Marigold’s Ghosts https://marigoldsghosts.libsyn.com/rss Transcript I came home from work, tired like normal. However, I smiled when my daughter came running up to me, excited that I was home. I noticed there was something red on her lips, but I pushed it aside. I picked her up into my arms, asking where her momma was, and as we walked into the living room, she patted her stomach with the biggest smile on her face. It was only then that I noticed my wife laying on the ground, little chunks missing from her face.

Fiction
Published: March 31, 2020, 6:53 p.m.

Armada

Armada Written by Charlotte O’Farell Voice : Dafydd Morse Music and Sound Design : Chris Gregory Transcript :  “The first sign was the clouds. The Shapes were odd, as if disturbed by unseen forces. The stars were dimmer, flickering at odd times. But none of us were worried. By the time the armada dropped their invisibility shield, the sky was full of spaceships, weapons poised” Charlotte O’Farrell is a horror writer. A lifelong fan of the genre, she aims to share her love of the weird and wonderful with her readers. Her stories have appeared in 25 anthologies. She writes daily flash fiction on Twitter. @ChaOFarrell and always enjoys interacting with her readers. She lives in Nottingham with her husband, daughter and cat. https://www.amazon.com/Charlotte-OFarrell/e/B07SBKX1G6?ref=dbs_p_ebk_w0m_abau_000000 Dafydd Morse is a voice actor and member of the Alternative Stories team.  He lives with his family in Wales. Alternative Stories and Fake Realities is an anthology podcast producing audio drama, short fiction and poetry using writers and actors from both sides of the Atlantic from its base right in the middle of England.   You can find us by searching alternative stories in your favourite podcast app or clicking on https://www.buzzsprout.com/411730  We’re social on twitter https://twitter.com/StoriesAlt  And Instagram https://www.instagram.com/stories.alt/  Email:  office@alternativestories.com    

Fiction
Published: March 31, 2020, 6:48 p.m.

Kids Jokes 1

Bio: Mandy Hall is a counselor by day, a podcaster by night, and a nerd all the time. They've worked on Shoebox Podcast and Zoo podcast, and their newest show is The Devil Hates Mondays. Guest appearances by their 6-year old daughter, who enjoys being creepy. Show: The Devil Hates Mondays @devilhatesmon Show notes: Kid Jokes 1-3, Zoe tells Knock Knock jokes.  Friendships: Just two pals being pals. This was inspired when I overheard my daughter talking to a Halloween decoration. Transcript, Kids jokes 1: Z: Knock knock M: Who's there? Z: Mr. Potato Head M: Mr. Potato Head Who? Z: Mr. Potato Head YOU! M: Me? Z: Knock Knock M: Who's there? Z: French Fries M: French Fries Who? Z: French Fries Potato Head. M: Oh...It's like a time traveling in the past, huh? Very clever, Very clever. This episode of Listen Rinse Repeat was performed by Zoe and Mandy Hall of The Devil Hates Mondays

Fiction
Published: March 31, 2020, 6:43 p.m.

Here comes the soap

Episode description  In between faking people’s death, the Interviewer is practicing diligent hand washing. And singing. The Amelia Project is a fiction podcast by Imploding Fictions.  Link to the main show  http://theameliaproject.libsyn.com/rss  Show notes  Written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager of The Amelia Project.   Performed by Alan Burgon.   Edited by Philip Thorne.  Sound mixing by Robert Rustad Amundsen.  Web: ameliapodcast.com  Twitter: @amelia_podcast  Instagram: @ameliapodcast  Transcript of  “Here comes the soap”  by The Amelia Project  THE INTERVIEWER IS WASHING HIS HANDS.   WE CAN HEAR WATER RUNNING AND THE SQUISHING OF SOAP.   THE INTERVIEWER  (singing merrily to the melody of “Here come’s the bride”)  Here comes the soap!  Bubbles and hope!  Washing my hands   is much better than... Uhm... dope! Hah!   I like the letter C!  Cocoa and cream tea!  I don’t like corona  and iiiiiit! Woooooon’t! Catch meeeeeeeee!  (Shouting to another room)  Alvina? Alvina! Are we supposed to wash our hands for thirty seconds... or thirty minutes?  (Beat)  Alvina, we’re out of soap!    CREDITS  This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written by Øystein Ulsberg Brager of The Amelia Project, featuring Alan Burgon as The Interviewer.  

Fiction
Published: March 31, 2020, 6:38 p.m.

Ghost Light Burning

J. Michael DeAngelis is a writer, actor and director. He is a co-creator, writer and producer for the Porch Room’s full-cast podcast comedy Mission: Rejected. TRANSCRIPT CARL Put the ghost light out, Fred. FRED Why do we leave a lamp on in an empty theater? It’s such a waste of electricity. CARL It’s not for people, boy. It’s for the ghosts. You can feel them, can’t you, Fred? Hear the footsteps in the catwalk when you know there’s no one up there? See the costume room door open by itself? Hear music from the pit when you thought you was alone in the theater? They’re here, Fred. They’re all around us! AND THEY DEMAND WE KEEP THE GHOST LIGHT BURNING - FOR IF YOU TURN IT OFF... FRED What are you doing, Carl? CARL If you turn it off... FRED CARL, STOP. CARL If you turn it off.. SFX: The click of the light going out and then Fred falling into the pit. CARL ...then someone is likely to fall off the stage in the dark, you putz. Now come on, we’ve got a party to go to. Written by J. Michael DeAngelis, voiced by J. Michael DeAngelis and Pete Barry

Fiction
Published: March 29, 2020, 5:55 p.m.

Future You: Part 1 of 8

”Hello past me, future you again.” In March and April of 2020, someone is receiving voicemails from… themselves in the future? This story in eight parts was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl. FUTURE YOU – Karin Heimdahl COMPUTER – Charlotte Norup To hear more from us, check out audio dramas Y2K and Calling Darkness. https://y2kpod.com/ https://callingdarknesspodcast.libsyn.com/ TRANSCRIPT COMPUTER Voice message, received March 15, 2020. (beep) FUTURE YOU (rushed, nervous) Hi, it’s me, I mean you, I mean you from the future. Oh, you recognize my voice, right? Well, hopefully. Anyway. Not much time. I need your help. You have a chance… a real chance to… save the world, I guess? (noise) I have to go. I’ll contact you again. COMPUTER (beep) Message ends. (beat) Message deleted. (beep) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written and produced by Karin Heimdahl, who also voiced future you. The computer voice was Charlotte Norup. To hear more from us, check out Y2K and Calling Darkness. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. Music also from Freesound https://freesound.org/people/Andrewkn/sounds/447511/

Fiction
Published: March 29, 2020, 5:50 p.m.

Starlancers: Part 2

This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written, produced, and performed by Gabriel Alvarez of Starcalled: a sci-fi, action audio fiction podcast. Sound and music also by Gabriel. Special thanks to Shannon Perry of the Oz-9 podcast and David S. Dear of A Ninth World Journal. TRANSCRIPT start Ships fly past -- shooting their blast cannons! THE MAN: They’re gaining on us. Open that control panel and get the shields back online. You pry open an access panel and hack the ship’s engineering matrix. THE MAN: I’ve got to make the calculations for hyperjump. BEEP! COMPUTER: Shields online. THE MAN: Whoa. Whatever you’re doing back there, it’s working. The ship charges up. THE MAN: Almost… there. COMPUTER: Hyperjump in 5 seconds. BEEP! THE MAN: That’s it! Hang on! COMPUTER: Initiating hyperjump. The ship flies off into the stars. end NARRATOR: This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written, produced, and performed by Gabriel Alvarez of Starcalled. Find out more on Twitter @starcalledradio.

Fiction
Published: March 29, 2020, 5:45 p.m.

The End of the World

Written by Eddie Louise | Performed by Emily Riley Piatt Find them on Twitter @SageAndSavant or at www.SageAndSavant.com TRANSCRIPT It was snowing the morning the world ended. Okay, not snowing exactly. Sneating? Slowing? The sky spit angry swaths of icy rain and snow mixed so that it all ended in a grey and dismal slush piled on the mud like an indictment. What sucked the most? Even on days the world ends, kids are expected to do their homework. CREDITS: Emily Riley Piatt plays Abigail in THE TALES OF SAGE AND SAVANT. Eddie Louise is writer and co-producer of same. Find them on Twitter @SageAndSavant or at www.SageAndSavant.com

Fiction
Published: March 29, 2020, 5:40 p.m.

Murderbird

Kate of Ignorance Was Bliss is a forensic psychologist and crisis clinician who collects stories, in an attempt to figure out how we become who we are. Website: iwbpodcast.com TRANSCRIPT I was on a remote New Hampshire road, when something flew overhead and landed on the hood of my car. Its eyes were huge. It looked at me… looked away… and looked back at me… all without moving its body. My brain went blank. I said, quote, “Oh my gawd… it’s… that’s… look… um… it’s… it’s a murderbird,” because an owl was blamed for the death of Kathleen Peterson. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances. And now you know the origin of the murderbird.

Fiction
Published: March 29, 2020, 5:35 p.m.

Tales of a Quarantined ESL Teacher

David Magadan is an MFA Actor, Writer, and Sound Designer as well as the creator of the Scifi Audio Drama Directive. Directive: Part 2 is now available for streaming on your favorite Podcatcher. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/directive/id1441355969 TRANSCRIPT Video call set up sounds, the mic on the other side connects and we hear the room tone kick in. JONATHAN Pat! What’s up man, how’s quarantine? PAT Good man! I finished all those 20,000 piece puzzles I impulse bought and alphabetized my movie collection by the likelihood of being watched again. What about you? You still doing your English teaching for Chinese kids? JONATHAN Yup! Still teaching the bao bao’s. PAT How’s that going? JONATHAN Uhhhhh Cuts to a class with Jonathan and Leo JONATHAN Good job Leo! Dui ya! (clicks) Okay Leo, What do you see on the mountain? LEO I see Teacher Jonathan. You are on the mountain. You jump off the mountain and you DIE. Big monsters eat you and you are DIE. YOU ARE SO WEAK. YOU ARE SO WEAK. Leo proceeds to go into a 6-year-old maniacal giggle, cuts back to the video call. JONATHAN great. Ya. Super rewarding. This episode was produced by David Magadan of Directive, with additional voices from Clayton Caufman and Fernando Perez.

Fiction
Published: March 29, 2020, 5:30 p.m.

Together Apart

Written and Performed by: Lindsey Kelly Music Performed by: David Andreana Produced by: Just Press Playhouse Just Press Playhouse is made up of Orlando Segarra and Gabe Templin. JPP produces Time Trip! and an anthology channel Just Press Playhouse Presents which houses Kid Pros and stand alone episodes such as Lights On in Puerto Rico! Time Trip!: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/time-trip/id1491176296 Kid Pros: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/just-press-playhouse-presents/id1145020758 TRANSCRIPT (Underscored by Unchained Melody.) VO. I stand at the bathroom sink. How did we get here? I turn on the faucet. Swayze, my roommate’s Old English Bulldog, senses my uneasiness and lays at my feet. I pick up the bar of soap and close my eyes. As I wash, a wave of calm passes over me, and there he is. His chest against my back, his cheek against my cheek, his warm hands running down the sides of my arms. He takes my hands in his and begins to guide me through the suds. I can feel him here washing with me.

Fiction
Published: March 29, 2020, 5:25 p.m.

They Need An Answer

When you leave the bathroom, they'll expect a decision. Written and performed by Gregory Bratton from Inspector Virlo Morton Lee Quotation taken from Macbeth by William Shakespeare https://ivml.podbean.com/ Gregory Bratton is a songwriter, recording artist, and the creator of the podcast, Inspector Virlo Morton Lee. TRANSCRIPT  SPOUSE Honey. You’ve got to go back in there. Randall has practically been handing out 25th Amendment t-shirts to everyone he can put in a corner.  And, it’s not like there’s a whole lot of places to hide from him down here. It’s not your fault. Okay? None of this is your fault. Now, stop it. Snap out of it. And, quit scrubbing and splashing around like a lunatic. My hands are as red as yours, but I would be ashamed if my heart were as pale and weak. Now, dry off your hands, touch up that beautiful face, and launch the missiles. ANNOUNCER This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written by Gregory Bratton from Inspector Virlo Morton Lee and voiced by the same.

Fiction
Published: March 29, 2020, 5:20 p.m.

The Lake

Written by Charlotte O’Farrell Voice : Dafydd Morse Charlotte O’Farrell is a horror writer. A lifelong fan of the genre, she aims to share her love of the weird and wonderful with her readers. Her stories have appeared in 25 anthologies. She writes daily flash fiction on Twitter @ChaOFarrell and always enjoys interacting with her readers. She lives in Nottingham with her husband, daughter and cat. https://www.amazon.com/Charlotte-OFarrell/e/B07SBKX1G6?ref=dbs_p_ebk_w0m_abau_000000 Dafydd Morse is a voice actor and member of the Alternative Stories team. He lives with his family in Wales. Music and sound design are by Chris Gregory Alternative Stories and Fake Realities is an anthology podcast producing audio drama, short fiction and poetry using writers and actors from both sides of the Atlantic from its base right in the middle of England. You can find us by searching alternative stories in your favourite podcast app or clicking on https://www.buzzsprout.com/411730 We’re social on twitter https://twitter.com/StoriesAlt And Instagram https://www.instagram.com/stories.alt/ Email: office@alternativestories.com TRANSCRIPT “Three groups tried to settle the lake through the centuries. None lasted a decade. The disappearances came, then the suicides. Something ancient and unfathomable drew people to the lake. Last week developers came, new houses planned. Let’s see how long they last.”

Fiction
Published: March 29, 2020, 5:15 p.m.

The Eastern Meadowlark

The Eastern Meadowlark is a bird of the tallgrass prairie, found in eastern North America and known for its melodious song. Hi! My name is Rob. I’m a naturalist and software engineer in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. For a decade I’ve been learning bird identification both by eye and ear, and occasionally leading small group birding outings with the Hamilton Naturalists’ Club. In the last few years I’ve also been recording birdsong, both with my handheld setup (iPhone + mic) and with automated bioacoustic recording devices I’ve built or acquired. Last year I set up the Hamilton Bioacoustics Research Project where we’ve recorded thousands of hours of soundscapes in natural spaces throughout our region. We’ve also devised various methods for volunteers to turn the recordings into observational data. This was a stepping-stone towards the creation of the Songbirding podcast. LINK https://songbirding.com/ @SongbirdingPod on Twitter TRANSCRIPT This is the song of the Eastern Meadowlark. [birdsong]

Fiction
Published: March 29, 2020, 5:10 p.m.

Sea Terrors Part Four: Submerged

Sea Terrors, Parts One through Five, were written, produced and voice acted by Mike Gagne of Asylum 94 Productions, home of Boston Harbor Horror. Mike Gagne is a full time Coastie, a full time podcaster (almost), a husband, and a father of three. Boston Harbor Horror Libsyn Feed: https://bostonhorror.libsyn.com/rss TRANSCRIPT EXT: THE ISLAND SOUNDS: Discombobulating effect UNRELIABLE NARRATOR I've lost all sense of time and direction. I chase coherent thought the way a coyote chases a roadrunner. I stumble through words and syllables that parallel my movements around SOUNDS: Incoherent mumbling, staggered footsteps UNRELIABLE NARRATOR This....place...that shouldn't be. Shouldn't exist. I feel a rumble beneath my feet; SOUNDS: Earthquake-like rumbling, followed by rushing water UNRELIABLE NARRATOR hoping - praying, it's the earth coming to swallow me whole. That hope is dashed when the water pours in from all directions, pulling me down into the unfathomable abyss.

Fiction
Published: March 29, 2020, 5:05 p.m.

Paw Washing

Today Raymond sits down with Smudge the dog. We talk about paw washing. This is a weird one even for me. But our guest was great. Written, Recorded, Edited, and all the things by Raymond Morse from 5 & 30 With Ruk Guest for this episode was Smudge the doodle If you want to find more by Raymond just look for @5and30withRuk on Twitter TRANSCRIPT Just when you thought my show could not get weirder I am joined today by Smudge .. the dog. Say hi Smudge Dog barking Ok first and only question bud, tell me how you feel paw washing? Much barking Well huh I had no idea. Do you have a reason for that or? Single bark Well there you have it folks, even Smudge says to wash your hands. And if you have listened to this while doing so congrats your hands are clean Final bark

Fiction
Published: March 29, 2020, 5 p.m.

The Quramaforis

Shownotes: Title: "The Quramaforis" Story written by Allison Schleisman Voice by Rosa Delgado Find more stories by Allison Schleisman and more voicework by Rosa Delgado by finding Elaine's Cooking for the Soul on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever else you find your survivalist podcasts. www.patreon.com/elainescooking TRANSCRIPT: The Quramaforis are an alien race whose members like to swap bodies for fun. The Quramaforis are big on fun. So when Robert woke up he was Maureen. Maureen had a fantastic day water skiing at the lake with her girlfriends and went to bed exhausted. They woke up as Kelly, who wasn’t really a morning person but still got a lot done, had a martini and fell asleep happy. Their eyes opened as Madison, who leapt out of bed, went on a jog, took a long shower and crawled into bed again for a nap. When she woke up she was Matthew who taught his kids how to make scrambled eggs and let them add food coloring and sprinkles to it. Later on, he tucked them in and went to bed himself.

Fiction
Published: March 28, 2020, 2:55 a.m.

What To Do

JC De La Torre is the creator, head writer and producer of the Continuum Force and the Vampires of White Chapel audio dramas. He is an author (Ancient Rising), creator of the IDW comic series Star Mage, and with his wife, Rita, a filmmaker (Seekers of the Lost Worlds and the animated series version of Star Mage). JC’s previous voice acting credits include Buzz in Continuum Force, Rick in Doctor Geek’s Laboratory and various background characters in Vampires of White Chapel. He is also a composer and will be composing all the music in Season Two for both his shows. INT.  THE CONTINUUM BUZZ: Buzz Borman here. Stuck on the Continuum again while the rest of the team goes galivanting across Ancient Egypt. Probably seeing the Exodus or battling alien spaceships as they build the pyramids. Don’t look at me like that – you know it’s true. And all I have is this stupid A.I. to talk to. Sally, are you there? Sally: DA. Buzz: So what are we going to talk about? Sally: I’m not speaking to you. Buzz: That’s just great. Now what do I do? Narrator: This episode of Listen Rinse Repeat was voiced and written by JC De La Torre of Continuum Force. It includes the voice of Calliope Collacott as Sally.

Fiction
Published: March 28, 2020, 2:50 a.m.

Sea Terrors Part 3: Wreck

Mike Gagne is a full time Coastie, (almost) full time podcaster, husband and father of three. Boston Harbor Horror Libsyn Feed: https://bostonhorror.libsyn.com/rss These micro episodes: Sea Terrors - Ghost Ship and Sea Terrors - Arrival, were written, produced and voice acted by Mike Gagne of Asylum 94 Productions, home of Boston Harbor Horror. EXT: ON DECK OF UNNAMED COAST GUARD CUTTER SOUNDS: Steel crashing against rock UNRELIABLE NARRATOR I come to my senses as steel and rock meet violently. I'm thrown to the deck as my ship crumples beneath me. I toss the jacob's ladder over the side and manage my way down on to the slick rock. SOUNDS: Ladder striking steel, boots coming down. UNRELIABLE NARRATOR I stumble away as my now-grounded ship loses its balance and begins to sway and topple. The crash of metal and subsequent explosion follow me as I dive...behind? SOUNDS: Steel crashing, explosions. UNRELIABLE NARRATOR In front of? Into? One of the misshapen columns. The rock, the shapes, they're...off. Not right...

Fiction
Published: March 28, 2020, 2:45 a.m.

The Secret Handshake of Geeks

You can name all the Pythons and probably Graham Chapman’s favorite drink. You know the importance of 42 and towels, what TARDIS stands for, and who calls his Impala “baby.” You regularly hang out with Edina and Patsy, keep your comics in plastic, and have at least one “action figure” that’s still mint-in-box but may not stay that way. You know how big a womp rat is, and if someone feeds you this line, you’ll respond without even thinking. Let your geek flag fly, my sibling. We know the good stuff. Oz 9 is a silly space comedy about a bunch of people you really wouldn’t trust your drink to, much less your life. Find us in the usual places or at https://oz-9.com. Transcript: Narrator: It was a dark, dreary Monday, a credit-card-debt, nothing-good-in-the-fridge, between-seasons-of-your-favorite-show, even-the-dog-doesn't-like-you Monday. John hurried home, collar up, head down, his mood splashing down in the muck with his shoes. Coming towards him was another man, also inadequately armored against the rain. As they passed, the man muttered, Man 1:"Why, you stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf-herder!" Narrator: Almost without thinking and without missing a beat, John replied, John: "Who's scruffy looking?" Narrator: And the day got a little better. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Tim Sherburn, Richard Cowen, and Eric Perry; written by Shannon Perry of Oz 9.

Fiction
Published: March 28, 2020, 2:40 a.m.

Wedding Dress

Wedding Dress  Written by Charlotte O’Farrell  Voice : Joy Hayward  Music and Sound Design : Chris Gregory  Charlotte O’Farrell is a horror writer. A lifelong fan of the genre, she aims to share her love of the weird and wonderful with her readers.  Her stories have appeared in 25 anthologies.  She writes daily flash fiction on Twitter. @ChaOFarrell and always enjoys interacting with her readers.  She lives in Nottingham with her husband, daughter and cat.   https://www.amazon.com/Charlotte-OFarrell/e/B07SBKX1G6?ref=dbs_p_ebk_w0m_abau_000000  Joy Hayward is a prolific voice actor and member of the Alternative Stories team.   Transcript :  “Beautiful, I told the wedding store owner, admiring my dress.  I wish I didn’t have to take it off!   A dark look fell over the owner’s face. My joints locked instantly.  I’m wearing it still, a mannequin in a window. I hope someone sees the silent scream in my eyes ”   Alternative Stories and Fake Realities is an anthology podcast producing audio drama, short fiction and poetry using writers and actors from both sides of the Atlantic from its base right in the middle of England.   You can find us by searching alternative stories in your favourite podcast app or clicking on https://www.buzzsprout.com/411730  We’re social on twitter https://twitter.com/StoriesAlt  And Instagram https://www.instagram.com/stories.alt/  Email:  office@alternativestories.com  

Fiction
Published: March 28, 2020, 2:35 a.m.

Breakup Dinner

Written by David S. Dear, producer of A Ninth World Journalhttps://ninthworldjournal.com   Breakup Dinner Tim just broke up with him in the middle of this fancy, upscale restaurant, having waited until after they’d had a second bottle of wine and dessert. What did it say about Jack that what upset him more than anything else was the fact that Tim had left him with the check?

Fiction
Published: March 28, 2020, 2:30 a.m.

20 seconds of HGL

Get ready to get down with your soapy self.  Credits: Original Music Written and produced by: Daniel Nichols of the HappyGoLukky Podcast Lead Vocals: Mason Nichols of the HappyGoLukky Podcast Unwitting Supporting Vocals: Kenneth Eckles of PRRP The HappyGoLukky Podcast​ is a family produced fiction podcast that's appropriate for all ages and a proud member of the Family Friendly PodiconGo Podcasting Network. Apple​ /​ Spotify​ /​ Stitcher​ /​ ​RadioPublic​ /​ ​GooglePodcast​ /​ iHeartRadio​ / ​Website

Fiction
Published: March 28, 2020, 2:25 a.m.

The Dime-Sized Queen

Bio:​ Jackie Jorgenson is a 5x award-winning actor with comedy and classical training. She is also a 3x award-winning screenwriter with a focus on comedy, drama, and fantasy. Show Link:​ ​https://anchor.fm/talesfromtheaether   Podchaser of Tales From The Aether: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/tales-from-the-aether-972129 Once Upon A Time There’s a Queen as big as a dime No one would listen So she quit her position To make music inside a wind chime This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written and voiced by Jackie Jorgenson of the original fairytale audio drama, Tales From The Aether.

Fiction
Published: March 28, 2020, 2:20 a.m.

Fear

Credits:  Written and Narrated by Robert Chauncey Produced by Haunted Griffin Entertainment for Listen Rinse Repeat For more information: Haunted Griffin Entertainment Website: ​http://www.hauntedgriffin.com Facebook: ​https://www.facebook.com/HauntedGriffinEntertainment Twitter: @hauntedgriffin Discord: ​https://discord.gg/pavBrXK   Tunnels Twitter: @TunnelsPodcast https://tunnelspodcast.libsyn.com/rss   Haunted Hell House of Horror Twitter: @hhhohpod https://hhhohpod.libsyn.com/rss   Marigold’s Ghosts https://marigoldsghosts.libsyn.com/rss Transcript: I’ve been afraid of heights for as long as I can remember, but standing on that cliff, looking down into the clear blue water below me, I wouldn’t let it control me any more. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, before I opened them and leapt off. I felt the rush of wind, as I turned my body, and cut through the water like it was nothing. I smiled as I came back to the surface, and as I felt the tug on my leg and agony ripped through my body, I knew I should have been afraid of sharks instead.

Fiction
Published: March 28, 2020, 2:15 a.m.

The Negotiation

Bio Chris Magilton is the creator of sci-fi audio drama Among the Stars and Bones, the story of a team of xenoarchaeologists investigating alien ruins deep below the surface of a toxic planet. He is also a voice actor, and can be heard as Hector Ivory in Kalila Stormfire's Economical Magick Services and Colonel Hayden in Copperheart. Link to main show www.amongthestarsandbones.com The Negotiation Show Notes A skilled corporate negotiator in his toughest assignment yet... The Negotiator: Chris Magilton The Boy: Dominic Magilton Written and Produced by Chris Magilton, creator of sci-fi audio drama Among the Stars and Bones. Check out @AmongStarsBones on Twitter to find out more. Transcript Negotiator: Alright (sigh), been a tough negotiation. So, to sum up: I've conceded to increased face-to-face meeting time between us, and indeed I think that will be great for our working relationship going forward. I've given you the accommodations you've asked for on our hours of operation. The uh...weekly bonus you argued for was a tough ask, but has been accepted by senior management. So, what do you say? Do we have a deal? Boy: No! I'm not going to bed! Negotiator sighs. Chris: Performed by Chris and Dominic Magilton. Written by Chris Magilton, creator of the audio drama Among the Stars and Bones. Music: Meticulous Task by Evil Mind Entertainment

Fiction
Published: March 28, 2020, 2:10 a.m.

Cabbage Roses

Bio: Rob Stringer writes sci-fi sitcom podcast, Oblivity. He’s also one half of ‘musicians’ Nik and the Sputz, and their alter-egos, Auctioneers – an Oxford-UK-based duo. @robdmstringer  Links to Oblivity: www.oblivitypodcast.com https://oblivity.libsyn.com/  NARRATOR: "I’m sorry?” She winced in her kneeling spot beside the cabbage roses.   From behind the crumbling wall, the silhouette whispered again.  She shielded her eyes with a mud-caked cotton glove, and a cold breeze stole past her cheek, disturbing the untucked strands of her white fringe.  “I can’t hear you from over there!”  The dim figure glided to her gate — a lattice of iron and ivy — and waited. The sky dragged a shroud of darkness across her rosemary bed.  Negotiating knee complaints, she clambered to her feet, and every neighbouring garden came into view; brown and withered.   “It’s no good, I’ll have to come to you”, she said; the pruning shears snug in her grip.   Show notes: Written and voiced by Rob Stringer, creator of sci-fi sitcom podcast Oblivity. Listen for cybernetic rodents and crème de menthe. www.oblivitypodcast.com @oblivitypodcast 

Fiction
Published: March 28, 2020, 2:05 a.m.

The Hallway

Episode notes: "The Hallway" was written, edited, and produced by Derek Graziano Bio: Derek Graziano is the host and producer of Rolling Misadventures, a tabletop actual play podcast meets short form audio drama, and cohost of LifeWorld, a true crime discussion podcast focusing on cybercrime. Show Links: www.rollingmisadventures.com https://www.spreaker.com/show/lifeworld Twitter: @RMisadventures Transcription: You awaken in bed, to the sound of soft running water down the hall. As you slowly fumble from your room, you enter a pitch black hallway, save for a sliver of light at the end. You make your way cautiously forward, the floorboards creaking with each step. Hand trembling on the doorknob, you throw the door open to a blinding light. As your eyes adjust, you see your roommate standing before you with a look of confusion. "I'm just washing my hands. Go back to bed you goof." This episode of “Listen. Rinse. Repeat.” was brought to you by Derek Graziano of Rolling Misadventures. Sounds were used under creative commons. Music used under creative commons from http://www.looperman.com

Fiction
Published: March 28, 2020, 2 a.m.

Lizzie Stays Seven

Real life super-family Aaron, June, and Lizzie are 2/3 Oz 9 assassins and 1/3 ridiculously cute kiddo. Talented beyond all reasonable measure, they live in IL and occasionally in outer space.  Lizzie Stays Seven Narrator: She got to 7 and decided she’d had enough growing up. She was tall enough to reach the cookie jar, strong enough to earn the respect of Brad the bully, fast enough to catch Scooby when he got out, smart enough to know the important stuff like the order of the planets, brave enough to stick her foot out from under the blankets and over the edge of the bed, even on Halloween night. Lizzie: “Seven is enough. Gracie is 8 and doesn’t believe in Santa Claus or magic wands anymore. I’m good right here,” Narrator: said Lizzie. And she was. Voiced by Aaron Clark and Lizzie Written by Shannon Perry https://oz-9.com

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 3:49 a.m.

20 Seconds' of Random Facts

Bio: The Ladies of Strange is a comedy podcast where we talk about everything from true crime, paranormal, conspiracy, and anything else we find questionable, odd, or eerie. Sit down with us every Thursday for a story presented by one of the hosts and learn with us that everyone has something they find strange, let us tell you why (sometimes) it’s not. Places to find the show: https://theladiesofstrange.com/listen-2/ Transcript: Ashley: Hello and welcome! We are The Ladies of Strange I’m Ashley Tiffany: I’m Tiffany Rebecca: And I’m Rebecca Ashley: Thank you for joining us for this special mini episode as we discuss... Tiffany: How long to wash ya’ BEEP hands Rebecca: And to not get down with the sickness. Are you guys ready for 20 seconds of random facts? Ashley: Let’s do it. Tiffany: Yes, Please. Rebecca: Alright I am starting a timer. You will know when it goes off ‘cuz it is very very loud. Ashley: Perfect. Rebecca: 3…2…1. Weird laws in Georgia of the U.S. of A. Number 1: It’s illegal to keep a donkey in a bath tub. Number 2: You can’t live on a boat for more that 30 days of the calendar year even if you’re just passing though the state which doesn’t make sense ‘cuz we’re mostly land bound. Number 3: You can carry an ice cream cone in your back pocket except on Sunday’s. Ashley: Fair Rebecca: Number 4: You cannot give away a goldfish to entice someone to play bingo. Why I don’t know. ALARM SOUNDS. Ashley: Perfect! Rebecca: And your hands are clean. Tiffany: I am so impressed. Good job ma’am.

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 3:10 a.m.

Loose Milk

Talon Stradley is a writer, musician, and audio producer based out of Long Beach, California. He is the creator of the award winning fiction podcast Newton’s Dark Room Presents as well as his other podcasts Main Street Mythology, The Whole Way Through, and Cochlea. Talon is currently working on his Recording Arts degree at Cal State Dominguez Hills. Episode Name: Loose Milk   Show Notes: A new farmer bought a cow but no bucket to carry all this milk! Produced by Talon Stradley of Newton’s Dark Room and performed by Trent Stradley.  Transcript:   [Sloshing]  Woah, oh no! I’m just, I’m carrying loose milk and I— I just, I got the cow but I don’t have the bucket and now I have to carry the milk everywhere. It’s all just everywhere. Spilling all over. I got to really keep it up. And all this loose milk. Aw man. Woah! Aw, man! Oh geez! It’s spilling and sloshing. And oh, it’s like juggling nothing and it’s so hard and there’s loose milk everywhere. I should’ve got a bucket.   This episode was produced by Talon Stradley of Newton’s Dark Room with a vocal performance by Trent Stradley.  Main Show Link: https://link.chtbl.com/NDRP

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 3 a.m.

The Finger Guillotine

You! Come into our Museum of Oddities where untold delights await the curious. But be careful what you touch, there might be consequences… “The Finger Guillotine” is an episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was voiced by Jack Marvin, written and produced by Emma Brown and Sean Abplanalp of Husk. More information about Husk can be found at huskpodcast.com. Sean Abplanalp and Emma Brown are a creative team from Portland, Oregon and the writers/directors/producers behind Husk. They are currently working on a forthcoming podcast entitled Troubled Waters set to be recorded post-pandemic. Sean is the author of two books, professional actor, and musician. Emma is a professional marketer and enjoys writing. The Finger Guillotine Welcome fine traveler to the Cavendish Museum of Oddities! Oh! I see you’re taken with our handheld guillotine? Indeed an interesting specimen. According to Medieval Chronologies the high courts used this very on to sever the fingers of thousands that broke the law. Indeed, these splatters are from a guest that got a little grab happy. Would you like to take a closer look? Here, why don’t you hold it? SFX: Slice AHHHHHH! This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was Voiced by Jack Marvin, written and produced by Emma Brown and Sean Abplanalp of Husk Podcast.

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 2:50 a.m.

Dr. Geek's Moment of Silence

Dr. Scott Viguié holds two doctorate degrees and is an archaeologist, attorney, actor and author which of course makes him perfect for the role of archaeologist Eli Sherzberg. (more on the good doctor below) INT: Doctor Geek’s Office SFX: Music intro Deus Ex: Welcome to Doctor Geek’s Moment of Science Dr Geek: While most of us are sheltering in place, remember that ordinary soap and water are very powerful tools that can keep us all healthy.  Why is that? Because viruses generally consist of RNA, proteins and lipids.  There are no strong bonds holding these building blocks together, so it doesn’t take much effort for the soap to dissolve the lipid (or fatty) layer causing the virus to become inactive.  That’s right, with soap the power to fight this pandemic is in your hands!   Dr Geek: This episode of listen rinse repeat was voiced by Dr. Scott Viguie and written by Doctor Geek’s Laboratory of Applied Geekdom www.drgeeklab.com Before his wife will permit him to go back to graduate school, yet again, Scott will have to promise to move on to something that starts with a “B”. As luck would have it, Scott is also the first bionic man. Well, … not exactly. In reality, Scott was one of the first to undergo extensive orthopedic surgery to compensate for cerebral palsy. While these cutting edge techniques did in fact grant him the ability to walk, making him better … stronger … faster, his new abilities did not in fact come with the cool sound effects. So began a lifelong obsession with science, technology, and the science fiction that inspires them. Scott’s love of all things science fiction and fantasy can be heard on various podcasts, including Transmissions From Gallifrey, Articles of the Shadow Proclamation, Earth Station One, and Earth Station Who. Scott is also one of the writers for Continuum Force, penning several of the episodes. Throughout the year, Scott travels the convention circuit, appearing at such conventions as Dragon*con, Time Lord Fest, and TimeGate, where he can be seen participating in Doctor Who related panels and speaking on such topics as “The Archaeology of Stargate”. Scott established Doctor Geek’s Laboratory and Doctor Geek’s Science Fair in the hope that it would encourage a rekindled sense of optimism for the future. That it would bring about enthusiasm for innovation. That it would bring the fictional world of tomorrow, one step closer to today. Scott is also a consultant for the Science & Entertaiment Exchange, a volunteer network based out of Los Angles that connects productions with experts who can add a little science to the fiction.

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 2:40 a.m.

Sweet Talk

About The Bird Brain Podcast: The Bird Brain Podcast is a unique birdie with a mix of Health and Wellness on Mondays, and Fridays short horror stories on the sub chapter “Night Owl”; Flight or Fright. Show Notes : We all have a daily routine, and run a process of what needs to be done in our heads even if it’s just a little pep talk. But then there are those thoughts that always seem to sneak in! This episode of “Listen, Rinse, Repeat” was written and narrated by, Isaiah Frizzelle of The Bird Brain Podcast. “Sweet Talk” Written By Isaiah Frizzelle Transcript “Sweet Talk” Guy stands in the mirror talking to himself. Head voice: Alright, take a deep breath. *inhales* Head voice: Alright repeat after me Guy: After Me Head voice: Not funny, focus Guy: Ok, Ok Head Voice: I’m amazing Guy: I’m amazing Head voice: I’m great Guy: I want cake Head voice: Ay ! Guy: I’m sorry, it rhymes. Head voice: Focus ! Guy: Okay, Okay, I’m great Head voice: I’m powerful Guy: I’m powerful Head voice: I let go of stress Guy: I let go of stress… because stressed spelled backwards is desserts Head voice: Would you…oh wait you’re right. Never mind you’re great let's just go get cake.

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 2:35 a.m.

Hazel the Earth Witch

Listen Rinse Repeat: Maddy Searle : Show notes This piece features the character of Hazel, an Earth Witch from the Alternative Stories and Fake Realities miniseries “The Angel’s Calling” by Victoria J Price Hazel is played by British voice actor and writer Maddy Searle, the creator and performer of the podcast The Prickwillow Papers Music and sound design are by Chris Gregory Transcript :   “As an Earth witch, I know a thing or two about magic.  I'll let you in on a secret: there's a little magic inside all of us, and it can be found in even the smallest of gestures. A laugh, a smile, checking in on a friend. You have magic in you, too.  Make sure you use it.”

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 2:30 a.m.

Protect Your Privacy!

Protect Your Privacy was written and performed by Jordache and Nikki Richardson from the Top of the Round Podcast. PROTECT YOUR PRIVACY TRANSCRIPT WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY JORDACHE AND NIKKI RICHARDSON Hi I’m Barry And I’m Susan And welcome to the Don’t Think Just Spend Network where we fulfill all your needs for twice the price. Are you tired of junk mail? Are you tired of people calling you? Send us your social security and credit card numbers and we’ll steal your identity – so they’re calling US instead! What a bargain! Totrpodcast.com Twitter: @totrcast Instagram: @topoftheround Facebook: @topoftheround "bike_bell_ding" by inspectorj (https://freesound.org/people/inspectorj/) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ "crowd_oohs_and_ahhs_in_excitement" by noah0189 (https://freesound.org/people/ noah0189/) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ "soft-blip-e" by newagesoup (https://freesound.org/people/newagesoup/) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 2:25 a.m.

You matter

I have something that I need you to do for me, since you’re already pausing to wash your hands. I need you to remember something super-important. Isolation isn’t just a physical thing. It’s mental, as well, and it can be scary and hard and dark. But you matter. I mean it. Even when you’re alone, you’re not. Reach out. Call. Text. You matter. You really do. Ignorance Was Bliss website: iwbpodcast.com Kate is a forensic psychologist and crisis clinician who collects stories, in an attempt to figure out how we become who we are.

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 2:20 a.m.

Ken Burns: Quarantine pt 1

John P. Dowgin is a published playwright and screenwriter currently residing in New Jersey. His screenplay 'Mile 42' was a finalist at the '17 Austin Film Festival. John also co-created the comedy podcast 'Mission: Rejected' (@MissionRejected on Twitter) with his partners at The Porch Room, an independent production company whose works have been performed on three continents. A number of their plays have been published by Samuel French as part of the compilation 'Accidents Happen'. ANNOUNCER: PBS proudly presents, Ken Burns ‘Quarantine’ AMBROSE: Dearest Eulabelle The situation grows dire. Russian Doll and Stranger Things no longer content me. Only Jeff Dunham specials beckon. Curse the algorithm, and his moving lips. Send strength. Yours, Ambrose ANNOUNCER: Produced by John and Faith Dowgin of the Mission: Rejected podcast.

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 2:15 a.m.

November 2012: Part 3 of 3

Karin Heimdahl Karin is the creator of audio drama Y2K. In 2019, she won an Audioverse award for writing a spoken word monologue. She is also a voice actor, podcaster and drama teacher turned project manager. Voice acting credits include Mirrors, Vampires of White Chapel, Copperheart and Hit the Bricks. She produces and co-hosts Det nya svarta, a pop culture podcast in Swedish. Karin lives in Gothenburg, Sweden. Links Y2K website https://y2kpod.com/  Listen https://y2kpod.com/episodes/  November 2012 – part 3 of 3 I think, this moment, this very moment, I will remember this. The little boy in the red snowsuit. And me. We are both here, and we almost weren’t. You- (child giggles, laugh) Hey, what you got there? Eeew. Glitter glue? (laughs) What am I supposed to do with a handful of glitter glue? (sounds of vigorous hand wiping, child giggling) My little glitter monster. (car unlock beep) CREDITS This Listen, Rinse, Repeat story was written, produced and voiced by Karin Heimdahl, that’s me! I’m the creator of audio drama Y2K. Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license.

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 2:10 a.m.

The Wizard

Written by Eddie Louise | Performed by Justin Bremer Gardigal slammed his staff into the hard, slate flagstones, the ringing thunk timed to his footsteps as he traversed the breezeway between domestic chambers and his tower. He was not sure what Eilidgh thought she was up to, but the ridiculous notion that she could choose her own future was a weed that he would soon prune from her garden. The wails of the girl’s tears danced in his wake and a small smile crooked the corner of his lips. He would turn the child’s weakness to his advantage. Her hysterics were proof that she was incapable of arranging her own marriage. Gardigal would do what was best. [Chuckle evilly over screams of the princess] CREDITS: Justin Bremer plays The Narrator in THE TALES OF SAGE AND SAVANT. Eddie Louise is writer and co-producer of same. Find them on Twitter @SageAndSavant or at www.SageAndSavant.com  

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 2:05 a.m.

Vampires!

JC De La Torre is the creator, head writer and producer of the Continuum Force and the Vampires of White Chapel audio dramas. He is an author (Ancient Rising), creator of the IDW comic series Star Mage, and with his wife, Rita, a filmmaker (Seekers of the Lost Worlds and the animated series version of Star Mage). JC’s previous voice acting credits include Buzz in Continuum Force, Rick in Doctor Geek’s Laboratory and various background characters in Vampires of White Chapel. He is also a composer and will be composing all the music in Season Two for both his shows. Episode Title: Vampires!  Ext. The Streets of White Chapel SFX: Sounds of street traffic, it’s night. Beep of a recorder. Cantello: Gio, There are vampires. They’re real. They’re not all sparkly and chatting up teenage girls, either. They’re more like animals, transforming into these hideous creatures that don’t just bite your neck but tear you limb from limb. Grosvernor believes Arianna is one of them.  Turned by the serial killer she was chasing, Allister Connacher. I will find them and end them both for what they did to Carl. I swear it. Narrator: This episode of Listen Rinse Repeat was voiced by Rita De La Torre and written by JC De La Torre of Vampires of White Chapel.  

Fiction
Published: March 27, 2020, 2 a.m.

Once, in Cobalt

Once, in Cobalt... I ran until my feet could no longer carry me. I slumped down against a tree to catch my breath hoping he wasn’t close behind. I heard the stories, but I didn’t think they were true. Old Yellow Top? A name that makes a monstrous humanoid beast sound more like a child’s teddy bear. But I heard the footfall and I knew he was there before I even turned my head… where he held out a trillium, the first of the season and then slumped down beside me, smiling. Maybe his name was appropriate after all. This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written and voiced by Jackie Jorgenson of the original fairytale audio drama, Tales From The Aether. Show Link:​ ​https://anchor.fm/talesfromtheaether   Podchaser of Tales From The Aether: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/tales-from-the-aether-972129 My Podchaser Creator Page: https://www.podchaser.com/creators/jackie-jorgenson-107a4YsYHW  Jackie Jorgenson is a 5x award-winning actor with comedy and classical training. She is also a 3x award-winning screenwriter with a focus on comedy, drama, and fantasy.

Fiction
Published: March 26, 2020, 1:55 a.m.

Books While Handwashing

Bio: Ann Sloan is the creator of The Carlötta Beautox Chronicles, a podcast sitcom. She hates talking about herself in the 3rd person so she’ll stop now. Show link: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-carl%C3%B6tta-beautox-chronicles/id1453887562 Welcome to Books While Handwashing…today Charles Dickens' masterpiece A Tale of Two Cities. Chapter One. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity? Really? I mean, can’t you just make up your mind Dickens? Because it kind of feels to me like you’re just trying to cover you a**.  This has been Ann Sloan from the Carlötta Beautox Chronicles Written and “performed”(ha!) by Ann Sloan Music: Music from https://filmmusic.io "Evening Melodrama" by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/)

Fiction
Published: March 26, 2020, 1:50 a.m.

Bagels and Brunettes: The Perp

Bagels and Brunettes - The Perp Narrator: Previously on Bagels and Brunettes... Kennedy: Johnsonivowitz, you let the perp get away! Johnsonivowitz: I don't think so, Kennedy. You're the one who let the perp get away. Chief: (very angry) Actually, you both let that bird get away! Johnsonivowitz: Bird? We said perp, Chief. Chief: Perp? I could have sworn you said bird. My bad. Well you two can work that out between you then. Written by David S. Dear, producer of A Ninth World Journal as the Narrator https://ninthworldjournal.com Featuring: Shannon Perry of Oz 9 as Kennedyhttps://oz-9.com Karin Heimdahl, producer of Y2K Podcast as Johnsonivowitzhttps://y2kpod.com Kyle Jones, producer of Discussing Network as the Chiefhttps://www.discussingnetwork.com Music is "Hot Pursuit" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: March 26, 2020, 1:45 a.m.

The Dream

Dwayne Farver Manifestations Transcript Growing up, there was a recurring dream that I would have.  I would go into a room, turn on the light, but there was a flash – and the bulb would immediately burn out. So, I would go into another room to turn on that light so I could see to change the other lightbulb.  But when I would turn that light on, flash!  No lights there either. That was when the dread would set in.  I knew they were there.  Shadowy figures standing in the corners. One time, something made me angry.  I rushed at the one closest to me, with my hands outstretched to grab it.  What I grabbed on to felt like denim overalls. That was when I woke up, laughing hysterically.  It was also the last time I had the dream. This episode of Listen Rinse Repeat was written and voiced by Dwayne Farver of Manifestations podcast. The scene music is "The Dark Side."  It is used with permission from the composer, Chill Carrier. https://chillcarrier.bandcamp.com/track/the-dark-side       Where to find me: Website:          http://www.podmanifest.com/ Hosting:           http://podmanifest.libsyn.com/ RSS Feed:           https://podmanifest.libsyn.com/rss Twitter:           https://twitter.com/PodManifest Instagram:       http://www.instagram.com/podmanifest/ Facebook:        https://www.facebook.com/podmanifest/ Contact us:      manifestationspodcast@gmail.com

Fiction
Published: March 26, 2020, 1:40 a.m.

November 2012 – part 2 of 3

Show notes - November 2012 This micro-memoir in three parts was written, produced and voiced by Karin Heimdahl. Karin is the creator of audio drama Y2K. Find out more at y2kpod.com Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license. November 2012 – part 2 of 3 It is dark. As dark as it can only get in Gothenburg on a Tuesday afternoon in late November before the snow. I can smell it. It’s coming tonight. Tomorrow we will dig out the sled and speed down the hill outside our house together, laughing and rolling around in the snow. But today, we are here, his hand in mine, his bulky winter boots sliding on the icy asphalt as we make our way towards the car. CREDITS This story was written, produced and voiced by Karin Heimdahl. Karin is the creator of audio drama Y2K. Find out more at y2kpod.com

Fiction
Published: March 26, 2020, 1:35 a.m.

Starlancers Part 1

This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written, produced, and performed by Gabriel Alvarez of Starcalled: a sci-fi, action audio fiction podcast. Sound and music also be Gabriel. Special thanks to Shannon Perry of the Oz-9 podcast and David S. Dear of A Ninth World Journal.  start GUARDS (O.S.):​ Up here -- they went this way! Move, move, move!  THE MAN: ​We’re out of time. You’re good with locks right?  He pulls you to a locked door.  THE MAN: ​Get those hands moving.  He knocks on the door.  THE MAN: ​This door’s the only way back to the ship. I’ll hold them off.  He cocks his plasma bolter.  THE MAN: ​You’d better be as good as they say.  You unlock the first set of calipers on the door.  THE MAN:​ You’re almost through… ...you’re pretty good. Don’t think you’re gonna get a bigger cut.  The door unlocks and slides open.  THE MAN: ​That’s it! Move!!  You both run through the door. He closes it. He grabs your shoulder.  THE MAN:​ Hey. Nice work back there. Now let’s get to the ship.    end NARRATOR: ​This episode of Listen, Rinse, Repeat was written, produced, and performed by Gabriel  Alvarez of Starcalled: a sci-fi, action audio fiction podcast. Find us on Twitter @starcalledradio. 

Fiction
Published: March 26, 2020, 1:30 a.m.

Strange Eggs - Kiwi

PRRP is a multi-award-winning podcast that reviews the reviews of its podcast. It’s good! Strange Eggs - Kiwi Transcript and Show Notes Kiwi lay big eggs. Not objectively big, but relatively big, compared to their tiny bodies, which are, I suppose, subjectively tiny. But like, the kiwi will take an entire month to produce a measly single egg, which ends up being like a fifth of their entire body weight. In fact, often the egg gets so big, they don’t even eat leading up to its expulsion. They just take up too much space! But the good news is, if any of this can be good news, is that kiwi eggs are mostly yolk, about 2/3rds yolk, so when they’re born, they basically are totally financially independent and free to go about their business. The kiwi lays strange eggs.  Story by Kenneth Eckle, PRRP Music by Mx Michael

Fiction
Published: March 26, 2020, 1:25 a.m.

Sea Terrors Part 2: Arrival

Mike Gagne is a full time Coastie, a full time podcaster (almost), a husband, and a father of three.  Boston Harbor Horror Libsyn Feed: https://bostonhorror.libsyn.com/rss  Sea Terrors, Parts One through Five, were written, produced and voice acted by Mike Gagne of Asylum 94 Productions, home of Boston Harbor Horror.    INT: SHIP BERTHING AREA SOUNDS: Silence UNRELIABLE NARRATOR I wake with a start and looked about. I'm in my rack, but the ship has stopped. I pull on coveralls and (boots on metal ladder) scramble to get outside. EXT: STARBOARD SIDE OF UNNAMED COAST GUARD CUTTER UNRELIABLE NARRATOR We are adrift in the fog, there's not another crewmember in sight. I clamor up to the bridge and it, too, is empty. I grab the 1MC and say, (PA Filter) "All hands, lay to the weatherdecks!" I hear something in the distance (waves crashing) and pull on the ship's whistle (fog horn sounds). The fog clears and I see greenish black rocks surrounding oddly stacked structures - Cyclopean monoliths that pain my mind to witness.

Fiction
Published: March 26, 2020, 1:20 a.m.

The first time on Mars

Gregory Bratton is a songwriter, recording artist, and the creator of the podcast, Inspector Virlo Morton Lee. Show Notes The First Time on Mars A husband takes a giant leap for hygiene. Written and performed by Gregory Bratton from Inspector Virlo Morton Lee Music by Chip Michael Sound FX from https://freesound.org/ Creative Commons 0

Fiction
Published: March 26, 2020, 1:15 a.m.

They Smell Blood

Rob Stringer writes sci-fi sitcom podcast, Oblivity. He’s also one half of ‘musicians’ Nik and the Sputz, and their alter-egos, Auctioneers – an Oxford-UK-based duo. @robdmstringer  They smell blood NARRATOR:They smell blood, he’d heard.    He flattened the peeling corners of the wet sticking plaster on his elbow, and shivered. The coastline was still an unimaginable distance away.  He curled his toes over the edge of the rotting raft that floated on polystyrene blocks, anchored to the seabed by slick, weed-choked chains, and risked a glimpse.  Spectres circled beneath the surface. Each a streamlined torpedo of deathless hunger.  Dizzy, he looked back towards the scattered bodies, and spotted his brother’s blue and white windbreak.   He slowed his breathing, adjusted his goggles, and stretched his arms out ahead of him.  Show notes: Written and voiced by Rob Stringer, creator of sci-fi sitcom podcast Oblivity. Listen for cybernetic rodents and crème de menthe. www.oblivitypodcast.com @oblivitypodcast 

Fiction
Published: March 26, 2020, 1:10 a.m.

The Lady Noor

This piece features the character “The Lady Noor” from the Alternative Stories and Fake Realities miniseries “The Angel’s Calling” by Victoria J Price Noor is played by Iraqi / Norwegian actress Saya Zahawi who has appeared in a number of Alternative Stories episodes and in BBC Radio Drama. Music and sound design are by Chris Gregory Transcript :                 “Call it magic, call it energy, call it what you will. Often it is our belief in something that helps the magic to grow. Witches like you and I hold the power within our fingertips to change the world.  We can save a life, maybe many lives and all you need is soap and water.”  About Alternative Stories and Fake Realities  Alternative Stories and Fake Realities is an anthology podcast producing audio drama, short fiction and poetry using writers and actors from both sides of the Atlantic from its base right in the middle of England. You can find us by searching alternative stories in your favourite podcast app or clicking on https://www.buzzsprout.com/411730 We’re social on twitter https://twitter.com/StoriesAlt And Instagram https://www.instagram.com/stories.alt/ Email:  office@alternativestories.com  

Fiction
Published: March 26, 2020, 1:05 a.m.

Warlord in the Mirror

This episode comes to you from Witchever Path, the interactive horror anthology where you can bring reward or ruin to our protagonists. Choose the Night. Choose the Unknown, Choose the Path. [sink going] Voice Today, you’re going to conquer the world Look at yourself in the mirror Is this not the warlord you were mean to be? Are you not the champion of the wastelands? This very day, you’ll [knock on door] Voice from outside Hurry up, I gotta pee. Voice [sighs] Just a minute!  

Fiction
Published: March 26, 2020, 1 a.m.

Sea Terrors Ghost Ship: Part 1

Sea Terrors by Mike Gagne Transcript: INT: BRIDGE OF UNNAMED COAST GUARD CUTTER SOUNDS: Nighttime, sea ambiance, slight rumble of engines in the background. UNRELIABLE NARRATOR I stand my watch every night, midnight until zero-four. Last night was different. Out of a nowhere, a massive vessel bore down on us from the port side. Came out of nowhere. I yelled to the helmsman, "Hard to starboard! Port ahead full!" We were too late. I reached for the collision alarm right before the moment of impact, but felt nothing. I looked over my shoulder to see the skeletal bridge crew of the ship passing right through us. Credits: Mike Gagne is a full time Coastie, (almost) full time podcaster, husband and father of three. Boston Harbor Horror Libsyn Feed: https://bostonhorror.libsyn.com/rss These micro episodes: Sea Terrors - Ghost Ship and Sea Terrors - Arrival, were written, produced and voice acted by Mike Gagne of Asylum 94 Productions, home of Boston Harbor Horror.

Fiction
Published: March 25, 2020, 3 a.m.

Math Test

You think you know math? You don't know math.  INT. OFFICE IT GUY How was the math test? MATH GIRL Inconclusive. IT GUY You took a math test and you got an “inconclusive”? MATH GIRL No, I didn’t take a test. We’re testing math. IT GUY You’re testing MATH ITSELF? MATH GIRL Math has shown some alarming trends. IT GUY What’s wrong with math? MATH GIRL Among other things, it’s warming. IT GUY MATH WARMING? MATH GIRL What are you doing? IT GUY I’m just compiling this week’s reports. MATH GIRL How many numbers are you using? They’re all over your screen. You’re wasting too many numbers, you’re a menace. IT GUY I - MATH GIRL In 100 years, there may not be any more math thanks to people like you. Pete Barry is a co-creator of the audio comedy Mission: Rejected. He is an award-winning screenwriter, playwright, actor, director and musician. He was named a 2013 Young and Hungry List writer, and Sony Pictures is currently developing his screenplay Marian. 

Fiction
Published: March 25, 2020, 2:55 a.m.

Lasso the Tin Dog

Show Notes: Lasso the Tin Dog found Timmy at the bottom of a well! Produced by Talon Stradley of Newton’s Dark Room. Transcript: [Metallic clanking] Cowdud: What is it, boy? [Metallic clanking] Cowdud: Oh no! Timmy fell down a well? [Metallic clanking] Cowdud: Well which well is it? [Metallic clanking] Cowdud: The one by the radioactive plant! [Metallic clanking] Cowdud: Well I better go back and get my keys so I can unlock— [Urgent metallic clanking] Cowdud: There’s no time because he’s chewing on a uranium ingot? [Metallic clanking] Cowdud: Oh, c’mon Lasso, let’s go! Talon Stradley is a writer, musician, and audio producer based out of Long Beach, California. He is the creator of the award winning fiction podcast Newton’s Dark Room Presents as well as his other podcasts Main Street Mythology, The Whole Way Through, and Cochlea. Talon is currently working on his Recording Arts degree at Cal State Dominguez Hills. Main Show Link: https://link.chtbl.com/NDRP

Fiction
Published: March 25, 2020, 2:50 a.m.

Indifference

INDIFFERENCE TRANSCRIPT WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY JORDACHE AND NIKKI RICHARDSON Are you tired? Are you stressed out? Are you constantly worried? Try the restorative powers of indifference Order now and get a 3 pack of vanilla, chocolate, and plain I used to overthink everything, until I found indifference… Warning: may cause bloating, a decreased sex drive, apathy, homicidal tendencies, hearing voices, regret, listening to the voices, spontaneous implosion, bees, the wrath of all bears on earth, unlimited pixie sticks, diarrhea, fruitcake, and mild swelling. Indifference was written and performed by Jordache and Nikki Richardson from the Top of the Round Podcast. Nikki and Jordache Richardson are married Washingtonians that edit, produce, and perform on the podcast Top of the Round. They have 2 fur babies and enjoy everything having to do with podcasting and voice acting. Totrpodcast.com Twitter: @totrcast Instagram: @topoftheround Facebook: @topoftheround Music from https://filmmusic.io "Fancy Family" by Rafael Krux (https://www.orchestralis.net/) License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/)

Fiction
Published: March 25, 2020, 2:45 a.m.

Blue Smoke

Rob Stringer writes sci-fi sitcom podcast, Oblivity. He’s also one half of ‘musicians’ Nik and the Sputz, and their alter-egos, Auctioneers – an Oxford-UK-based duo. @robdmstringer Links to Oblivity: www.oblivitypodcast.com https://oblivity.libsyn.com/   Blue Smoke NARRATOR:       Agent Zamora rubbed a close-shaven temple. He swore the bone-dry ticking of the cheap clock above him was half the cause of his migraine. “We know it was you, Blue Smoke, or whatever the tabloids call ya. Just tell us where you stashed the apparatus, and we can end this.” The other contributing half imagined what it might be to throw her cuffed hands around his neck, and gently kiss his forehead. But she had a reputation to maintain, not to mention a tight timescale. “You’ve gotten further than most. You’ll find me again.” She braced herself as the hour hand crept towards six pm. Beneath her newly-scarred skin, her skeleton glimmered and hummed. Show notes:     Written and voiced by Rob Stringer, creator of sci-fi sitcom podcast Oblivity. Listen for cybernetic rodents and crème de menthe. www.oblivitypodcast.com @oblivitypodcast

Fiction
Published: March 25, 2020, 2:40 a.m.

Dad takes the call

LISTEN RINSE REPEAT    Dad Takes the Call     Lee Shackleford SOUND:  PHONE RINGS (EXT), IS PICKED UP DAD:   Hello? Yes --  I’ll call her to the phone! But -- while I have you on the line, I want you to know that my daughter is my precious baby -- don’t interrupt -- and you both have age-appropriate hormones raging, so it’s not impossible that the two of you may suddenly find yourselves as prospective parents! So just know that you and my grandchild will be welcomed into this family with all--Hello?  Hello?  SOUND: HANG UP PHONE DAD:   Heh heh. ============= SHOW NOTES: When I was a young man, somebody’s dad did this to me. I never forgot it. -- Lee Shackleford of RELATIVITY  -- www.relativitypodcast.com 

Fiction
Published: March 25, 2020, 2:35 a.m.

November 2012 - part 1 of 3

November 2012 – part 1 of 3 Transcript: (front door opening, outside ambience, footsteps) I look down at him, in his red snowsuit and his black hat with white stars sprinkled all over it, and I think: We did it. We made it all the way here. I take his hand and we walk across the parking lot. He looks up at me, proud of his newfound walking skills. Whoopsidaisy. Almost fell there. But all is well. CREDITS  This micro-memoir in three parts was written, produced and voiced by Karin Heimdahl. Karin is the creator of audio drama Y2K. Find out more at y2kpod.com Sound effects either created by Karin, or from freesound.org under the Creative Commons 0 license.

Fiction
Published: March 25, 2020, 2:30 a.m.

Carlötta Beautox: Punch it in the face

PUNCH IT IN THE FACE Witch:  You must pass a test. Now answer wisely. What do you do when life gives you lemons? Carlötta:  You make lemonade? Witch:  Wrong! You punch it in the face. What happens when the going gets tough? Carlötta: The tough get going? Witch:  Wrong! The tough punch the going in the face! Carlötta:  I think I’m getting it. Narrator:  Wash your hands so they’ll be nice and clean for when you punch Coronavirus in the face. A PSA from the Carlötta Beautox Chronicles. Show notes: Carlötta:          Samantha Gordon Witch:              Sarah Agor Narrator:         Ann Sloan Written and produced by Ann Sloan Music:             The Chamber by Kevin MacLeod Link: https://incompetech.filmmusic.io/song/4486-the-chamber License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Fiction
Published: March 25, 2020, 2:25 a.m.

The storm for wolves and witches

Do thunderstorms awaken the wolf in you? Or the witch? Transcript: It was the perfect storm. The thunder was equal parts crackle and boom, and the lightning that followed threw off shards of light, split the dark and sewed it up again. This night, this moon, this storm were for wolves and witches, and Sara, who was a bit of both, headed towards the mountaintops where the wild things were. Voiced by: Bonnie Brantley Written by: Shannon Perry Find more by both of us on Oz 9 podcast. Available on about any podcatcher, including wherever you're listening to this.     

Fiction
Published: March 25, 2020, 2:20 a.m.

Donk becomes a father

Donk (formerly C4) of Best in Galaxy has recently come into some money and decides to start a family.  It doesn't go all that well. Don't forget to #WashYourHands Story and voice by Mark Restuccia 

Fiction
Published: March 25, 2020, 2:15 a.m.

The Big Mice

A great, 60-second question: Where do lakes come from? Lather up and give this explanation a listen! Find more stories by Allison Schleisman and more voicework by Thomas Anthony Jones by finding Elaine's Cooking for the Soul on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever else you find your survivalist podcasts. www.patreon.com/elainescooking TRANSCRIPT: When the Big Mice arrived, they landed in the mitten-shaped state of Michigan. This was long before mittens were a thing. The Big Mice liked Michigan, but it surrounded by nothing but empty canyons. So they set out to find water. Which they did. Find water, I mean. Each Big Mouse filled its cheeks up real big, ran back to Michigan, and spit into the empty canyons. They put on floppy hats and learned how to do underwater somersaults. It was nice. But the Big Mice had other worlds to explore, and eventually piled back into their translucent traveling sphere and rolled away, leaving behind nothing but good vibes. This was long after good vibes were a thing. Story written by Allison Schleisman Voice by Thomas Anthony Jones Artwork by Tyler Snodgrass: on Instagram @tyler_snod and on Twitter @tylersnod

Fiction
Published: March 25, 2020, 2:10 a.m.

Service

Service Human #1: Can I help you? Human #2: Yes, can I get two pancakes with a side of bacon? Human #1: You do realize this is the Army Recruitment Office… Human #2: Oh. Well then I’ll have two pancakes with a side of bacon, and thank you for your service. Written by David S. Dear, producer of A Ninth World JournalVoice of Human #2 Featuring Lee Shackleford, producer of Relativity PodcastVoice of Human #1

Fiction
Published: March 25, 2020, 2:05 a.m.

Listen, Rinse, Repeat

How many times can you really sing Happy Birthday or the ABCs before you're ready to launch the paper towel dispenser out the nearest window? (Apparently the answer is 88, but we won't discuss how we know that.)  To ease the pain of yet another 20 seconds standing at the sink, a group of podcasters have come together to create these 20-second (ish) shorts. Our Micro-Podcasts Against Micro-Organisms will entertain you AND help you reduce the spread of disease. So, fire one up, lather up, and listen, rinse, repeat!  Thank you to Lee Shackleford of Relativity Podcast for the artwork, and Chip Michael of Sage & Savant for music! Voiced by Richard Nadolny and Shannon Perry of Oz 9.

Fiction
Published: March 24, 2020, 9:05 p.m.

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