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One of the most loving things you can do for yourself is to feel love and no judgement when it comes to the people around you.  When you ask them 'why are you doing this' and are thinking you are just being curious if you are not really judging them for what they are doing or how they are doing it and if you are judging them and thinking they should do it differently or not do it at all i want you to notice how when you think that you are simply blocking yourself from loving them.   
If you want to create more time where you enjoy their company imagine allowing the to do this thing that you don't agree with and not want them to do it differently. 

Don't pretend to be curious and ask them WHY they are doing this, be curious about why you think they should do it differently.