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In this episode I have a long overdue chat with Amanda Howard. Amanda is one of my oldest friends, a serial killer expert, true crime author, TV guest and co host of the incredibly successful true crime podcast, Monsters Who Murder. Amanda is also the wife of Steve Bendeich. Steve was also one of my oldest friends and it was Steve's death by suicide that motivated me to create How You Going Mate?. In the first of the first part of a 2 part episode I talk to Amanda about her relationship with Steve, the unanswered questions left by his death, the process of grief, the impact on their children and how her work with serial killers has helped with managing her mental health.