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Published: May 1, 2024, 8 a.m.

Today\u2019s episode, #218, brings to a close\xa0 Season 8 of our You Were Made for This podcast. If you\u2019ve been listening for any length of time, I hope you\u2019ve come to appreciate the high value we place on the skill of listening as a way to enrich our lives. As we wrap up Season 8 today, I\u2019m going to share a story that illustrates why it\u2019s better to listen than to talk.

But before we get into today\u2019s episode, here\u2019s what this podcast is all about.\xa0

\xa0Welcome to You Were Made for This

If you find yourself wanting more from your relationships, you\u2019ve come to the right place. Here you\u2019ll discover practical principles you can use to experience the life-giving relationships you were made for.

I\u2019m your host, John Certalic, award-winning author and relationship coach, here to help you find more joy in the relationships God designed for you.

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An example from the Bible of how it\u2019s better to listen than to talk

Alright. Now, for today, I\u2019m going to start by sharing with you an interesting example in the Bible of listening found in the Gospel of Matthew, chapter 17, verses 1-8. It\u2019s often referred to the transfiguration of Jesus. Here\u2019s the story:

1Six days later Jesus took Peter and the two brothers, James and John, and led them up a high mountain to be alone. 2As the men watched, Jesus\u2019 appearance was transformed so that his face shone like the sun, and his clothes became as white as light. 3Suddenly, Moses and Elijah appeared and began talking with Jesus.

4Peter exclaimed, \u201cLord, it\u2019s wonderful for us to be here! If you want, I\u2019ll make three shelters as memorials[a]\u2014one for you, one for Moses, and one for Elijah.\u201d

5\xa0But even as he spoke, a bright cloud overshadowed them, and a voice from the cloud said, \u201cThis is my dearly loved Son, who brings me great joy. Listen to him.\u201d 6The disciples were terrified and fell face down on the ground.

7Then Jesus came over and touched them. \u201cGet up,\u201d he said. \u201cDon\u2019t be afraid.\u201d 8And when they looked up, Moses and Elijah were gone, and they saw only Jesus.

A few observations\xa0

The passage is full of references to light. Jesus' face is shone like the sun\u2026His clothes are \u201cas white as light.\u201d\xa0 God speaks from a \u201cbright cloud.\u201d

Another thing I noticed in this passage is what an unusual circumstance Peter, James, and John find themselves in. Not only does Jesus change his appearance, but we also have him in conversation with Moses and Elijah, two Old Testament figures who died centuries ago. There\u2019s clearly a relationship between the three of them.

But the three apostles have no category or words to process what they are seeing. They\u2019ve never seen anything like this before.

And then I noticed one word that jumps out, waving its arms to tell me it\u2019s the keyword in the text, around which everything else orbits. Like all the planets revolving around the sun. It\u2019s the word \u201clisten\u201d in verse 5.

In the original Greek language in which the New Testament is written, listen means \u201cto hear, consider, learn from, to understand, comprehend.\u201d

A contrast in reacting to Jesus

We see how this relational dynamic of listening is played out in how the three disciples react to this most unusual situation.

Peter was awestruck by what he saw at the top of the mountain that day.\xa0 And rather than sitting back and letting the event unfold, he starts talking. He was so uncomfortable with this transformation of Jesus, plus the return of Elijah and Moses from the dead. He had never seen anything like this.\xa0

So Peter deals with his discomfort by proposing this laughable building plan that sounds so spiritual: Building three shelters or tabernacles, one each for Jesus, Moses, and Elijah.

Peter interjected himself into the conversation between Jesus, Elijah, and Moses. Do you think they were talking about the need for a shelter or tabernacle for each of them? I don\u2019t think so.\xa0

The truly awesome revelation of the majesty of God should have silenced Peter by taking his breath away.\xa0

In contrast to Peter, we have James and John were also present, but they didn\u2019t say a word. Everyone else was talking: Jesus, Moses, Elijah, and, of course, Peter. Have you ever been the silent one in the room where everyone else is talking?\xa0 I wonder what it was like for these quiet two.

We miss things when we talk rather than listen

The text says Jesus took Peter, James, and John with him up a mountain \u201cto be alone.\u201d Jesus\u2019s appearance then changed: \u201cHis face showed like the sun, and his clothes became as white as light.\u201d\xa0

For what purpose? He becomes transformed with all this brightness. Why?\xa0 Then Moses and Elijah show up from the dead? How come? What does all this mean?

We don\u2019t know the answer to any of these questions because Peter starts talking. Had he kept quiet, and just watched and listened, we might have learned more. But by talking, Peter changes the trajectory of the event by sharing what he\u2019s thinking rather than waiting to hear what Jesus has to say.

Theologians have speculated for centuries what Jesus had in mind when he orchestrated this event. I wonder how this story would have turned out had Peter kept his mouth closed, like James and John, and let the story unfold without interjecting himself into it.

Notice also what Peter says, \u201cLord, it\u2019s wonderful for us to be here!\u201d He was making this spectacular event all about him, and not about Jesus and his agenda.

We often personalize events and make them about us when, in reality, they\u2019re about what Jesus is doing to advance his kingdom.

Peter couldn\u2019t wait to see things unfold. He couldn\u2019t step into the larger story of Jesus, his transfiguration, and the conversation between Jesus, Moses, and Elijah.\xa0

He made this event about the smaller story of his feelings of awkwardness and his way of coping with it through his building proposal. It\u2019s understandable that Peter would feel ill at ease, for there\u2019s no category for what he, James, and John witnessed. Yet James and John kept quiet. Peter could have, too.

What are we to learn from this story?

I want to come back to the original meaning of \u201clisten\u201d that I mentioned at the beginning.\xa0 In the original Greek, as I mentioned, listen means \u201cto hear, consider, learn from, to understand, comprehend.\u201d

What are we to consider, learn from, understand, or comprehend from this story? \xa0

It reminds me of the fortune cookie photo you can see in the show notes and on our website.\xa0 It was sent to me by Kathy, a long-time friend and board member of our ministry. She happened to be in San Fransisco on a trip with her son.\xa0 Kathy is well-versed in our passion for promoting good listening and wrote the following about the photo:

We then went to a Chinese restaurant in San Francisco\u2019s Chinatown, and after dinner, I opened my fortune cookie and practically gasped out loud when I saw this fortune! \xa0It was much better than the typical\xa0"A pleasant surprise is waiting for you" fortune! \xa0I knew right away I had to share it with you!

\u201cThere are lessons to be learned by listening to others\u201d

\u201cIt\u2019s better to listen\u201d principles from the Transfiguration story

So what can we take away from this story to help us in our relationships?\xa0 Here are a few:

• It\u2019s better to listen than talk when we don\u2019t understand something
• Don\u2019t let our own personal story, as important as it may be to us, get in the way of the larger story of God\u2019s purposes. Keep our story small. God\u2019s story large.\xa0
• Look for how our story fits into God\u2019s story, not the other way around.
• Since Jesus brings great joy to God, we do ourselves a big favor when we listen to Jesus. In doing so, we will bring joy to God, too.
• When we listen to Jesus, everything else falls into place. Our fears, our concerns, our hope for the future

Closing

As we wrap up season eight today, I\u2019d love to hear any thoughts you have about today\u2019s episode. I hope your thinking was stimulated by today\u2019s show, to see how you can put into practice the better to listen principle.

For when you do, it will help you experience the joy of relationships God desires for you. Because after all, You Were Made for This.

And don\u2019t forget, if you want to get on my email list so we can stay in touch going forward, you\u2019ll need to sign up for it. Unless, of course, you\u2019re already getting my weekly emails. Click here or go to johncertalic.com/email to get on my email list.

Well, that\u2019s it for today. If there\u2019s someone in your life you think might like to hear what you just heard, please forward this episode on to them. Scroll down to the bottom of the show notes and click on one of the options in the yellow \u201cShare This\u201d bar.

And don\u2019t forget to spread a little relational sunshine around the people you meet this week. Spark some joy for them.\xa0 And I\u2019ll see you again next time. Goodbye for now.

Other episodes or resources related to today\u2019s shows

139: Why Should I Listen to This Podcast?

021: The Most Important Relationship of All

Prior recent episode

217: God Will Surprise Us

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