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Published: Nov. 22, 2019, 9 a.m.

If you've been sexually abused in any way, it changes the way you live your life. You can heal but it takes work and courage. But what if you're abused, you report or tell someone about it and you're not believed? This aftermath of abuse -- this total negation of what happened -- can feel even worse than the initial trauma. That's what we're focusing on today on SelfWork. If you've been abused, listening may trigger you in some way. So please take care. Ask for help if you need it. The hotline numbers for both the UK and the US can be found in the show notes.

The listener email is from a young woman who\u2019s identified with perfectly hidden depression but doesn\u2019t know how to begin to look for a therapist\u2026 and how to reveal her hiding.

Important links:

The Indianapolis Star\xa0revealed\xa0massive exploitation and coverup of sexual abuse in the US Gymnastics program

RAINN's statistics: most rapes\xa0never get reported.\xa0Other\xa0figures are staggering.

Andy Woodward's story as he \xa0revealed the\xa0details\xa0of his abuse.

Study identifying\xa0several irrational beliefs\xa0about male sexual abuse.

My own article on becoming\xa0sexually aroused during the abuse

Studies indicate that 1/3\xa0of abused male children are likely to abuse.

In the UK, The Samaritans can be contacted on 116 123. In the US, the National Suicide Prevention Hotline is 1-800-273-8255. In Australia, the crisis support service Lifeline is on 13 11 14. For the RAINN sexual abuse hotline click here.

You can hear more about the aftermath of abuse and many other topics by listening to my podcast,\xa0SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford.\xa0Subscribe\xa0to my website and receive one weekly newsletter including my weekly blog post and podcast! If you\u2019d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My new book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression\xa0has arrived and you can order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there\u2019s a new way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You\u2019ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you\u2019re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I\u2019ll look forward to hearing from you!

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