208 SelfWork: "Is It Worth It?' When Rumination Drags You Down A Rabbit Hole

Published: Dec. 11, 2020, 6 a.m.

Sometimes my own life offers a topic to me; I was definitely struggling to not be dragged down by my own rumination this past weekend. So many of us are spending hours worrying about Covid, politics, the future, finances, about jobs. The list is endless. So today, in this episode, sponsored once again by BetterHelp, we\u2019re going to talk about rumination. Is it ever helpful? Or is it something that\u2019s dragging you down a rabbit hole of negativity?

The listener email is different this week in format. I was very touched by Kat Cardy, an artist in the UK, who sent me a poem she\u2019d written based on her identification with perfectly hidden depression. I asked her permission to use it and she said yes! It\u2019s lovely\u2026 and my heart was very full when she sent it.

I was interviewed on a podcast called Seize the Moment by two New Yorkers,, Alen Ulmann and Leon Garber. \xa0What I didn\u2019t know was that they\u2019d both not only read the book, but identified themselves on the spectrum of PHD; in fact, Leon revealed that he himself had at one time been suicidal, and had told a psychiatrist there was something wrong. The doctor looked at him (he\u2019s a very verbal, friendly guy) and said, \u201cWhat? No way\u2026 you\u2019re not depressed.\u201d We\u2019ve got to stop this from happening..\xa0 So they brought their own experience with it to the interview and I learned so much from them. You will see the link to the YouTube interview in the show notes.

Important Links:

BetterHelp, the #1 online therapy provider, has a special offer for you now!

Quotes from\xa0Dr. Michael Greenberg, a psychologist who specializes in OCD

An article by Medical News Today,\xa0listing potential triggers for rumination

Dr. Guy Winch talks about ruminating in this PsychToday article:

Psych Today article by Kathryn Gordon listing eight ways to eliminate negative painful rumination.

Kat Cardy's\xa0poem:

Unlocking. Unlocking doesn\u2019t happen all at once. First there\u2019s just emptiness. A lack. A missing. A guarding. A hardening. The reason unknown, but it\u2019s presence noted; Pain caused, joy blocked, love evaded, disconnect... Hurt encapsulated in silt till a heavy rock replaces the alive and vibrant. Continuing unexamined, or else denied outright, And The Lock, Stays. Shut. But should attention settle here, intention stop to lend some care, Either lock, or key, or both is found, A mystery perhaps, but with meaning profound. Then one day it clicks... you may not even realise it, But inch by inch that great key turns, That, frozen for years, begins to stir. A fraction here; I see you, dear. A sliver there; I know you\u2019re near. That solid rock which spirit hid, Oh so slowly turns clear instead. Inching forth, I feel your hurt. And turning more, I know your worth. Glowing embers re-kindle again, The breath of attention nursing flame Til one day, The lock falls away. That light of a soul kept hidden so long Shines forth like a beacon; I\u2019m here, I belong That great treasure guarded all these years, Finally displayed for all to see, A fragile thing, alive and singing, a bird, uncaged, released and free. Unlocking doesn\u2019t happen all at once. But it can happen, if you are patient, kind, and strong.

The Seize The Moment podcast interview

You can hear more about mental health and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford.\xa0Subscribe\xa0to my website and receive one weekly newsletter including my weekly blog post and podcast! If you\u2019d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My new book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression\xa0has arrived and you can order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism or need for control which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there\u2019s a new way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You\u2019ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you\u2019re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I\u2019ll look forward to hearing from you!

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