Sleepwalkers - Starring Clovis, Attack Cat

Published: Oct. 25, 2017, 10:09 p.m.

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Cat people. It\'s a movie about cat people. Written by horror master, Stephen King, it\'s arguably the most comedic horror film ever made. You thought Dreamcatcher was rife with errors...buckle in, folks.

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Sleepwalkers is absolutely bananas. We\'ll just say right now that this is a must-do film for fans of crummy movies. It\'s a laugh riot. For instance, let\'s just put it out there that the chief action star of this film is a house cat, named Clovis. Clovis rivals Chuck Norris, Schwaz, Stallone and Van Damme in the pantheon of 90s action stars. I\'m not joking.

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So the film is basically about these cat people-- Ancient Egyptian people that have no origin but all of the superpowers (teleportation, telekinesis, invisibility, shape-shifting, invulnerability, immortality) and one of the most dumb weakness of all, allergic to cats. They are cat-people (half-people, half-cat) and their one weakness is cats?!?! Right. So if you\'ve got a plague of cat-people in your town, if you don\'t have a Clovis, supercop, you\'re screwed I guess.

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So the plot\'s dumb. Check! Then there\'s the elements. The makeup is awful. The action is ludicrous (see Clovis). The cameos are constant. The dialogue is atrocious (Perlman - "It\'s a Polish Fire Drill!" when someone steps in a bear trap). And the effects are... well... a clinic on how not to do effects (with the exception of one great morph effect when the Mustang transforms into a Trans Am). Also, that Trans Am is seriously bitchin\'.

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It\'s one of Jackie\'s best picks of the entire series of our show. Sleepwalkers is a MUST-DO film. Fantastic.

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Streaming Do\'s and Don\'ts

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  • Curse of Chucky - Netflix
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  • Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master - $2.99 on Amazon Prime
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  • Ghoulies - Epix
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