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Paul grew up in what he says should be a normal childhood.\\xa0 He attended a very good school, was a good student and athlete.\\xa0 But he always had a feeling of being different and inadequate.\\xa0 At age 12 or 13, while playing on a hockey team, Paul drank when celebrating winning a championship game.\\xa0 While he drank before, he had never got drunk until that time.\\xa0 It was a horrifically sickening experience for Paul but it would not be the last time he would drink, as being drunk felt magical to him.\\xa0 In high school, Paul would begin to use marijuana and experiment with narcotics.\\xa0 And then he became a drug dealer.