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b'I have a lot of wives coming to me asking how to get their husband to be more assertive in bed.\\xa0 The problem is, our society and culture have taught men to be more submissive, and take a back seat with regard to sex.\\xa0 We\'re either explicitly or implicitly taught that we should let the woman lead in the physical relationship.\\n\\nThe problem is that many married women don\'t want that.\\xa0 They want a husband who is assertive and confident, not waiting for his wife to make the first move and anxious.\\n\\nSo, this podcast is about how to help your husband to be more assertive in the bedroom, because while I can tell men all day to be more confident, the truth is, a lot of it has to do with how his wife responds.\\n\\nGive him more opportunities to be assertive, to lead, to be confident - Have sex more often, ask him what he wants, play "would you rather".\\n\\nCompliment him when he is more assertive - This will boost his confidence and make it more likely he\'ll try again.\\n\\nDon\'t question his requests - unless there is a really good reason to.\\xa0 Questions can be misinterpreted as a negative response.\\n\\nBe enthusiastic - Lets him know he\'s serving you well.\\xa0 Don\'t sigh, make faces, drag your feet or roll your eyes.\\n\\nHave a good attitude - Smile, lean in\\n\\nBe vocal - Give feedback, especially with what he\'s doing well.\\xa0 Phrase change requests as a positive.\\xa0 Talk dirty (check out our guide here).\\xa0 Ask him to speak up when he likes something you are doing.\\n\\nHandle less than ideal situations with grade - Don\'t tense up and push him away.\\xa0 Find a way to adjust and melt into a new position if need be.\\xa0 Be assertive yourself, show him what it looks like.\\n\\nTalk about your expectations and turnons beforehand - Write an erotic story, tell him what you want "I think it would be hot if you ...", don\'t know your turnons or boundaries?\\xa0 Check out our Sexploration List.\\xa0 Knowing what\'s expected can ease anxiety.\\n\\nTurn the lights on - It\'s easier to be more confident when you aren\'t fumbling in the dark.\\xa0 Body image issues?\\xa0 Wear a blindfold.\\n\\nTalk about sex when you aren\'t having it - What went well, what could make it every better - frame these as positive statements. "That was hot when you did ___.\\xa0 I think it would be even hotter if you did ___."\\n\\nTake a lesson from improve - Respond to everything with "yes, and ... " never say "no" unless absolutely necessary.\\n\\nHave more ideas, comment below!\\n\\nLike the episode? Leave a review on iTunes or anywhere else you listened to it.'