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You probably know drinking water is good for you.

You probably also know dehydration is bad for you, and you\u2019ve probably heard you should drink water frequently throughout the day and err on the side of drinking a little more than you feel necessary rather than less.

And you\u2019re probably here because you heard that instead of drinking boring peasant water, you should avail yourself of the miraculous health benefits of alkaline water, including . . .

- Less inflammation and oxidative stress in the body
- Better hydration
- Anti-aging effects
- Weight loss
- Less joint pain and fewer headaches
- Lower risk of cancer, fatigue, leaky gut, osteoporosis, and basically every other ailment
- More energy, drive, and vitality
- And more

In fact, according to some of the self-professed H20 experts shilling alkaline water, you should never drink anything but high-pH water.

To do that, all you have to do is fork over a few grand for a contraption that uses a process called ionization (magic, basically) to transmute toxic tap water into a super-hydrating, inflammation-fighting, life-giving elixir \u201cthey\u201d don\u2019t want you to know about.

If you\u2019re uncomfortable with that price tag, you\u2019re looking at this the wrong way. Just think about how much money your pristine health is going to save you in the long run.

When your friends and family start dropping like flies due to heart disease, diabetes, cancer, and the like, you\u2019re going to be bouncing gleefully from one day to the next, like you\u2019ve swallowed the star from Super Mario.

So the real question is how can you not afford to buy a water sorcery machine from me for which I\u2019ll be paid a 50% sales commission?

What\u2019s that? You want to know if there\u2019s any scientific evidence of these claims?

Of course there\u2019s scientific evidence. Don\u2019t look into it, but 97% of water scientists agree with everything I\u2019ve just said. Now will that be cash or credit?

And this is where my comedy shtick ends and real joke begins, which is alkaline water itself. Because the short story is it\u2019s nonsense. All of it.

Let\u2019s find out why.

5:06 - What is alkaline water?
6:59 - What is ionized water?
10:22 - Why do people drink alkaline and ionized water?
19:20 - Who popularized alkaline dieting and drinking?
21:04 - Is ionized water better for you?
22:05 - What does ionized water do for you?

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