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Life Is Work - Ep 9 - Non-Violent Communication

• Area of Work: Intersectional Equity 

Co-hosts, Producers:

Danielle Stenger 
Cameron Navarro, LMSW 

Mel’s Mindful Minute:

Melanie Wilmoth Navarro, LMSW, RYT, TSTSY-F

Owner, Lead Instructor - Whole Moon Wellness

wholemoonwellness@gmail.com

Contact Info:

Website

Email

Twitter 

Instagram

Music:

Intro - King Must Die, by Picnic Lightning

MMM Transitions - Sur, by Picnic Lightning

Outro - Pa’lante, by Hurray for the Riff Raff

Nonviolent Communication (Compassionate Communication)

Result: To provide a framework for how to speak to people in an approachable way, even if what you are communicating is constructive criticism. Nonviolent communication is a framework that can help you effectively meet your needs and your colleagues needs - how do we talk to people?

• Nonviolent Communication/Compassionate Communication
  • Definition - NVC is a framework for communicating with compassion. It reframes how we express ourselves and hear others. Instead of habitual, automatic reactions, our words become conscious responses based firmly on awareness of what we are perceiving, feeling, and wanting. How can we better respond, versus react, when giving and receiving feedback?
  • 4 Components of NVS: Observations, Feelings, Needs, Requests
    
     
• Observations: Things that you can hear/see vs. evaluations, which include judgment.
• Feelings
  • Back to Feelings! Feelings are triggered by needs that are met or unmet
    • List of feelings
• Needs
  • List of Needs
• Strategies
  • Strategies are the actions that we take to meet our needs and the needs of others
• Making requests instead of demands
  • Action request: Would you make copies of this form? Would you call this potential donor/customer?
  • Connection Request: Would you help me brainstorm ideas for scenario planning? Would you be willing to review this project draft and discuss how it could be improved?
• Can be used in lots of areas of life (life is work!)
  • intimate relationships
  • families
  • schools
  • organizations and institutions
  • therapy and counseling relationships
  • diplomatic and business negotiations
  • disputes and conflicts of any  nature
• Questions
  • none this week
• Mel’s Mindful Minute - Cameron subbing in :)
  • Loving Kindness Meditation
    • Real Love, by Sharon Salzberg
• We Are Always Students
  • Nonviolent Communication by Marshall B. Rosenberg
  • Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication by Oren Jay Sofer
  • Radical Candor by Kim Scott, lol
  • Many Voices, One Song by Ted Rau and Jerry Koch-Gonzalez
• Sharing is Self-Caring
• Self-care - Start With You! 
  • Self-care
    • Review the list of needs and feelings
      • Identify a time when a need what met, and how you felt. What strategy caused the need to be met?
      • Identify a time that need was not met and how you felt. What strategy did not meet your need? 
• Community-care - Taking Care of Others 
  • Think about a recent communication you had with someone (colleague, friend, partner) that did not go like you wanted to. Thinking about the framework of NVC, how could you communicate differently if that same situation happened again?
  • Practice!
• Systemic/Structural-Care - The Wider Systems We Live & Work In
  • What patterns do you notice in how people communicate with each other?
  • What is the culture of communication in your organization, family, friend circles?
  • How did we internalize patterns in communication? 
  • What makes it challenging to change?
• Reach Out!
  • Website - lifeisworkpod.com
    • Find questions submission link
  • Insta & Twitter - lifeisworkpod