Broadcasts.com - "Micromanaging" (Life is Work)

RESULT: To explore the concept of micromanaging - what it usually looks like, why it usually occurs, how to manage it if it happens, and do better if we are the ones doing the micromanaging!
Danecdote
- Key theme of this episode (and most all all eps) - NVC
- Key need/value of mine is autonomy, so I am triggered quickly when told to do things a certain way - I need a lot of information around why a thing needs to be done a certain way
- Ex. When I have perceived an experience of micromanagement - calendar visibility
- Ex. When I have been a culprit of doing the micromanaging - completely restructured an agenda that a teammate did in a training I’m in without talking with her about it first
  - Trying to meet my need for competency - completely missed how it might make her feel

Protein - Main Event - Topic d’jour

Micromanaging

What is it?
- A form of control
- Usually focused on details of what employees are doing and how they are doing it
How we have seen it manifest & the challenges associated
- Calendar sharing
  - Make the request with the framing of they want to be sure they schedule things with your availability in mind, but then schedule things when you have things already scheduled (creates distrust - not using the access for what you said it was intended for)
  - Using the calendar view to interrogate you how how you use your time
    - Why are you meeting with so and so?
    - Did it take you that long to do x?
    - Your calendar isn’t completely booked, so you’re not that busy
- Meetings
  - Danielle’s least favorite kind of meeting - standing status update meetings
    - Weekly
    - Daily
    - At all
    - Challenge: Time is taken up explaining that I’m doing my job, updates are best received for me by email
  - Meetings where everyone “checks in” but the person with the most authority
    - Felt experience is that “other” staff members are the only ones that need processing/are experiencing feelings
    - Create an environment where it’s perceived that the person in authority does not trust their team with their own feelings
    - “You have to tell me everything, but I will only tell you some things”
- Telling You Exactly How to Do Your Work
  - Email
    - “Write this”
  - Agendas
    - Need approval/completely change what you’ve created
  - One-Pagers/Documents
    - Either mark up your work like an English paper or completely re-work it and send it back
      - Note: There is a difference between coaching for growth and giving instructions that just best suit your preferences - more on this in a minute
- Faux Brainstorming
  - Gather the group to brainstorm ideas for how to tackle a project/challenge, then person in authority comes back with the plan without further discussion or consensus with the group
  - It appears as if there is right answer, and we have to “guess” at what it is - no other ideas are heard
    - Challenge: feels like a waste of time, creates a sense of inferiority/powerlessness within the group
How to Do Better
- First, understand why micromanaging happens
- Will start from the perspective of someone who is being micromanaged
- To do this, we have to use good ol’ NVC
- Remember: Everything anybody says or does is a strategy to meet their own needs and has nothing to do with you
  - Observation: What did the person say or do that could be caught on camera? (creates a shared reality vs. a perception, which assumes intention and may be incorrect - not shared reality - ex. “My boss is micromanaging me” vs. “My boss asked me to email the agenda to them before I sent it out”)
  - What need might they be trying to meet with their action?
    - In the case of micromanagement, the need that people are trying to meet often falls within one of these universal human needs:
      - Competence, clarity, effectiveness, participation, understanding, stability, support, safety, autonomy
  - Micromanagement is often a strategy that people use to meet one or more of these needs
    - Often without realizing they are micromanaging
    - Often without realizing they are causing harm
    - Can intersect without other power structures - what we have learned about what it means to be a leader, a person with authority and influence, also external pressures they may not be sharing with you, and - as always - how they feel about themselves
      - (note, none have to do with you!)
  - Understanding the need the person is trying to meet with their actions that you are perceiving as micromanaging can help you empathize with them and prepare to have a conversation with them about it
  - Prioritize connection before solution
    - No one likes to feel like a means to an end - seek to understand and connect before requesting the change
  - Example: “When I hear you ask to have a full access to my work calendar and then I receive calendar invitation from you that conflicts with meetings I have previously scheduled, I feel frustrated and overwhelmed, because I need time for preparation and respect for the time I have put into scheduling my meetings. Would you be willing to take a look at my calendar before sending a calendar invitation to me?
If YOU are the person micromanaging - same process!
- Observations - what are requests that you make of your team?
- What needs are you trying to meet?
- How might the strategies you are using to meet those needs make your team feel?
- Request feedback (be specific!) and be clear about why you are asking for what you are asking for
- Be open to new ideas
A note on “right” and “wrong”
- It becomes more difficult to manage a conflict if we get stuck in trying to decide what is “right” and what is “wrong” (binaries/dichotomies are a quick way to silence/overlook voices - we want to center humanity and all of its complexity!)
- For example, working with the office door open is not more “right” than to have it closed
- If we get caught up in our judgements about why someone has their door closed “they don’t like us,” “they aren’t a team player,” - different judgements that suggest they are “wrong,” it impedes connection and understanding
- Focus on the needs of people involved and then search for a strategy that will meet those needs

Mel’s Mindful Minute: 44:54

Chair Yoga

We Are Always Students

Human Connection at Work by Liv Larsson
- English translation can read a little funky (translated from Swedish)
- Good application of NVC in workplace specifically
Our episode on NVC - Episode 9

Sharing is Self-Caring

Self-care
- What is a request you’ve made of someone recently? What need was it connected to? How do you feel?
Community-care
- Think about the support you provide to your teammates. What needs of theirs are you meeting? How do you feel?
Systems-care
- How does micromanaging typically manifest in your organization, and what systems are in place that encourage or discourage it?

Reach Out!

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info@palanteconsulting.com