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Lyn is joined on this week’s show by Pam Chand, a matchmaking expert whose talent in bringing people together originated from her childhood and cultural background. Pam’s fascinating insights into the singles market are born out of a desire to try a different approach. For so long, the matchmaking industry has been concerned only with setting up dates instead of helping singles to realise why they might be alone or attracting the wrong types of partner. Join Lyn and Pam as they discuss what it really means to love ourselves, the power of self-confidence, the concept of “Groundhog Date” and the top complaints made by singles looking for love, namely that “Men are bad, and women are hard work”... KEY TAKEAWAYS Pam’s background as a matchmaker didn’t begin through business interests, but actually as part of her Indian 'arranged marriage' culture. Her father was a matchmaker for those from her cultural background, and matched over a hundred couples during Pam’s upbringing. Pam was present for many of these meetings, and was naturally drawn to the art of matchmaking as a career. In the matchmaking industry, Pam found that many companies were just arranging dates and not matching potential partners for life. Pam decided to take a more specialist view and began exploring the things that weren’t working for singles. This involved offering coaching sessions, as many of the issues that prevent successful dating stem from our past experiences. One of the stumbling blocks to finding our perfect mate is that we sometimes do not consider ourselves worthy. Low self-confidence and belief is all down to a lack of awareness. Pam advises embracing the feeling, stepping outside of ourselves for a moment, and considering what this low self-confidence and belief may have done to us over the years, and whether or not we wish it to continue? On a biological level, women communicate verbally a lot more than men. Women tend to say around 20,000 words per day, compared to men who say around 7,000. Pam advises clients who feel they are being hen-pecked that it’s often not a form of chastisement, but a natural biological expression. There needs to be more understanding about the biological, physical and behavioural 'differences' between men and women. Too often we believe that human beings are all the 'same', and are disappointed to discover that people in the world around us don’t behave to the same standards that we set for ourselves. We should always take responsibility for the person that we are. We always have a choice in the type of life we wish to have going forward. Blame builds resentment, and it can also be hugely dis-empowering.  Relationship coaching can impact your world in many powerful ways. A more positive healthier 'you' means a more positive personal life, family / social life, even career / business life. Loving ourselves is where it all begins. BEST MOMENTS 'I fell in love with the idea of love' ‘We really do work holistically with a person instead of just finding them a date’ ‘Every second is a new moment in our life’ ‘People think success is 'external', but it’s not. It’s all about the rewards that come from doing the 'internal' work’ ‘People need to look at themselves first. We are the centre of our own universe’ ‘LOVE is bigger than just those four letters' VALUABLE RESOURCES Hearts Entwined Podcast -Apple Podcasts (iTunes) -Spotify -Stitcher Grandeur And Love pam@grandeurandlove.com   ABOUT THE HOST Lyn Smith – (The Queen of HEARTS) – Love, Dating & Relationship Expert   Lyn’s personal story is a very inspirational and harrowing one of how she went from having unhealthy and unfulfilling relationships with men (on the back of several serious traumatic sexual assaults in her teens) to now being in a soul fulfilling relationship which makes her feel alive, is full of passion and gives her inner peace.  She has a proven track record as a Love Solutions - Relationship Expert / Trainer / Inspirational Speaker and Best-Selling Author based upon her own vast personal research, experiential learning and training with the world’s leading industry experts. Understanding the polarisation of masculine & feminine energy resulted in her creating massive attraction and a passionate, intimate, fulfilling relationship – that inspired her to design & present her own course programmes to share these break-through relationship techniques with women across the globe.  HEARTS Entwined is a world-class service based on care and understanding, which is committed to providing step-by-step high-value love, dating and relationship solutions.  Lyn makes a difference by helping you make a difference; she has a vision of contributing back on a global scale – to create a lasting legacy of safety, dignity and opportunity for children and women who have survived rape, abuse and severe trauma as a result of war crimes and sex trafficking – through the setting up of worldwide – ‘you can heal your life’ centres.   CONTACT METHOD lyn@hearts-entwined.com   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.