S1E09 - Not a Date

Published: May 1, 2020, 1 p.m.

JUST AS THE DARKEST OF PROPHECIES PREDICTED, EPISODE NINE HAS ARRIVED IN ALL ITS HORRIFYING GLORY! PREPARE, IF YOU CAN, FOR AN ESPECIALLY EDUCATIONAL FERAL FOLIAGE SEGMENT ON THE DASTARDLY DANDELION! STEEL YOURSELVES FOR MY SAGE WISDOM ON SELECTING TRANSPLANT SEEDLINGS! TRY NOT TO BE OVERCOME BY AWE AS I ADVISE A LISTENER ON DEALING WITH UNWANTED HERBIVOROUS PESTS! AND... LOOK, LISTENERS, I'VE ONLY EVER WANTED THIS SHOW TO BE ABOUT GARDENING, BUT TWO OF MY MINIONS HAVE DECIDED TO DRAG MY PERSONAL LIFE INTO THE SPOTLIGHT! AGGRAVATING AS THIS IS, THEIR UNPROFESSIONAL QUESTIONING ACTUALLY LEADS TO SOME HIGH-QUALITY DISCUSSION ON HOW TO EVADE ASSASSINS! YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS THIS EPISODE... IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE! NYAHAHAHAHA!