Patio Panic Triple-Nine Teatime

Published: Aug. 2, 2023, 7 a.m.

b'In this episode, we cover the harrowing history of patio products and how they have made their way into 911 calls. In a relevant way, The Op artfully weaves a tapestry of history, nuance, and 911 into a story you won\\u2019t put down - it\\u2019s also hard to pick up because it\\u2019s audio. We do some math, too: woman + shotgun = intruder - his head. We ended it with a 999 call from our friends from Britannia. If you\\u2019re not paying for 11:59 PLUS yet, this episode will make you go, \\u201cI need to pay for PLUS.\\u201d Because you\\u2019ll want more of what we offer, but we understand if you can\\u2019t afford $5 a month. Also, you can afford it, and you want more. Here\\u2019s some helpful math: 11:59 + your $5 = you + happiness - we don\\u2019t threaten you with a shotgun. It\\u2019s not a threat. But it sort of is. Either start paying for 11:59 PLUS and change your life forever, or we will find you and break into your house with a patio furniture, and you\\u2019ll have to shoot us with a shotgun. I feel like I\\u2019ve written too much now, and maybe I\\u2019ve overstepped a boundary with you, dear listener. So I\\u2019ll stop now. But you\\u2019ve been warned and threatened. So let\\u2019s just make it all better. We will do stuff on PLUS. You pay $5, and nobody is gonna get killed, OK? Hugs. \\u2764\\ufe0f

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