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Today will be my final devotional with Wilderness Wanderings as we welcome Pastor Anthony back from his sabbatical.\xa0 Thank you for the opportunity to journey with you over these past four months.\xa0 I have been encouraged and uplifted by many of you. Today I am once again pulling from a student publication, this one that I wrote in January of this year.

But he said to me,\xa0\u201cMy grace\xa0is sufficient for you, for my power\xa0is made perfect in weakness.\u201d\xa0Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ\u2019s power may rest on me. (2 Corinthians 12:9)

I\u2019m tired.\xa0 I\u2019m angry.\xa0 I\u2019m lonely.\xa0 I\u2019m overwhelmed.\xa0 I\u2019m afraid.\xa0 Have you spoken, or even thought any of these words over the past months, weeks, or days?\xa0 Well, if you have you\u2019re not alone.\xa0 And it\u2019s easy to get caught up in the raging storm, especially when it\u2019s so long, so big, so all-encompassing.\xa0 It often seems easier to put up a front, showing our friends, neighbours, family and church community that we\u2019re strong, that we\u2019re getting through this and that we\u2019re okay.\xa0 And don\u2019t the physical masks we wear right now help us to achieve that?\xa0 It\u2019s easy to show others that we\u2019re brave, strong and that everything\u2019s okay when half of our faces are hidden behind a physical mask when we\u2019re in contact with others. We\u2019ve been through a lot over the last year, and none of us can see what\u2019s on the other side of the horizon yet.\xa0 That\u2019s God\u2019s territory.\xa0 He knows what\u2019s to come.\xa0 And He knows where we\u2019re really at too.\xa0

As I was listening to music, a song came on that I had heard many times before, \u201cJust Be Held\u201d by Casting Crowns.\xa0 This song gives me peace in knowing that God not only holds my life and my heart, but loves me, and never lets me go.\xa0 On this day, however, as I listened to the opening verse my mind started turning beyond these truths.\xa0

Verse 1:\xa0 Hold it all together, everybody needs you strong. But life hits you out of nowhere, and barely leaves you holding on. And when you\u2019re tired of fighting, chained by your control, there\u2019s freedom in surrender.\xa0 Lay it down and let it go.

The first line of this song is exactly what I\u2019ve been seeing around me.\xa0 On social media, Facebook friends are posting cute pictures of their kids and walks in the park.\xa0 Smiling faces and good times.\xa0 Lots of people give \u201clikes\u201d for those sorts of things.\xa0 That\u2019s what people want to see and read about.\xa0 That\u2019s what people need. Especially right now.\xa0 We want to be seen as strong and resilient because maybe, just maybe that will bring others hope.\xa0

\xa0Or maybe it\u2019s just because we don\u2019t want to let other people see our struggles and pain.\xa0\xa0

How would others view us if we allowed them to see beneath our masks?\xa0 Not the physical masks we\u2019re wearing right now.\xa0 Our internal ones.\xa0 The masks that show us to be holding on, staying strong, doing well, getting through with a bit of breathing room to spare. \xa0 As a parent, when my children see me having a rough day, I often want to hide what I\u2019m going through.\xa0 I want my children to see me as a resilient and joy-filled mom who can handle anything.\xa0 But they know the truth.\xa0 They\u2019ve experienced stress and hardship too.\xa0

Others don\u2019t need to know that we\u2019re strong and holding it all together.\xa0They need to know that God is stronger than the best strong-front we can put on.\xa0 He holds us and loves us and is our greatest strength amid our greatest weaknesses and times of trial. God\u2019s power is made perfect in weakness (2 Cor 12:9).\xa0 He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless (Is 40:29). \xa0This is what the Casting Crowns song is talking about!\xa0 When we are tired, angry, lonely, overwhelmed, afraid\u2026it is in these places that God reaches down to hold us, uphold us, strengthen us and reveal His power in us.\xa0 He carries us when we are having trouble carrying ourselves and His power in and through us becomes our greatest strength when we are weak.\xa0 We don\u2019t need to carry the weight of the world on our shoulders.\xa0 Christ has already taken it all.\xa0

But it\u2019s hard to lay down our burdens. That involves surrender to God.\xa0 Letting go of everything we hold dear.\xa0 It means letting go of our pride, our self-sufficiency, and our own strength that we often rely on.\xa0 Surrender means to admit that we\u2019re not enough, and never will be, and that\u2019s okay.\xa0 Surrender means that we don\u2019t have to put on a front and show the world or fellow Christians that we\u2019re strong, resilient, and we\u2019re doing just fine.\xa0 Surrender, although to the world\u2019s standards sounds like weakness, is in fact the place where our true strength begins, not where it ends.\xa0

Because in surrender we find that our weakest, most broken place has room to start the journey towards healing and wholeness.\xa0 In the act of surrender, that is, our every weakness and strength, hope for the future and despair from the past, we will find a peace and a strength like no other.\xa0 And that is because in our weakness God is made strong.\xa0\xa0

Do we need others to see that we\u2019re always strong and holding on?\xa0 It is in our weaknesses, brokenness and imperfections that God\u2019s strength is most acutely seen.\xa0 And isn\u2019t that who we really want the world to see in us?\xa0 So maybe right now we don\u2019t need to hold on and be strong.\xa0 Maybe this is the time to let it all go and let some of our weakness and brokenness show through.\xa0 It is there that our True Strength is found.