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Its the day before Valentine's Day and you don't have a date. Don't fret! Iris Ruth Pastor shares a few tips on how to not be blue this time around.

Website: www.irisruthpastor.com
Follow: @irisruthpastor

About Iris:
It all started with me trying my hand at publishing a parenting newspaper with five kids. I was in the same city where I had experienced a failed first marriage. My aunt was absent-minded. My uncle was ailing.

I wrote a first person account about my two-week ordeal and used it in the premier edition of the newspaper. I titled it \u201cIncidentally, Iris\u201d in case I came up with any other things I wanted to reflect on in future issues. And I signed off with the phrase \u201cKeep Coping\u201d \u2014 which was about the only thing that I managed to do during that visit, albeit not very gracefully.

Since that time 27 years ago, I\u2019ve written over 600 columns, on a vast number of topics \u2014 parenting and family issues, major milestone events, health and well-being challenges, goals attained and those that fell short, losses avoided and losses sustained. Honors. Awards. Hard won wisdom. Empty nest. Empty heart. Maintaining relations with adult children. Long distance grand parenting.

At first I believed my column was so well-received because my children, my husband, and my life were just so interesting that no one could resist reading about my experiences. Over time, I observed that almost every bit of feedback I received dealt with my readers\u2019 unique responses to both my world and my words \u2014 in relation to their own life and personal concerns.

When I wrote about losing my grandmother at such a young age, people who had experienced premature loss spoke up.

When I wrote about the poignancy in watching my \u201caverage\u201d children excel \u2014 and sometimes not excel \u2014 in school and extra-curriculars, people who also had \u201caverage\u201d children spoke up.

When I wrote about coming to terms with the sadness involved in watching my children grow up and leave home (or not leave home when they should), people who had experienced that same sadness spoke up.
When I wrote about the delight of stealing a few moments of solitude and relaxation in the midst of a busy day of responsibilities and deadlines, people who also had time constraints and never ending pressure spoke up.

Readers approached me in doctors\u2019 offices, at Little League games, and in grocery store lines. By mail. Then by text and phone message. The feedback was and continues to be centered around my ability to figuratively reside in my readers\u2019 kitchens \u2014 to mirror their thoughts, hopes, fears, goals and aspirations.

When I started, I thought I was writing a column about me. But it didn\u2019t take me a long time to realize it really was about my reader. Recognizing that, I expanded into publishing a book of my earliest columns in 1996, Slices, Bites and Other Facts of Life and launched a motivational speaking career.

Here\u2019s some feedback:

Iris is a GPS for the spirit.

Iris is a far from perfect woman who knows life\u2019s tough, but beautiful.

Iris is all about what real women relate to.

Iris is a slice-of-life writer/speaker who peels back the layers.

Iris\u2019s writing is informative without being boring; fluffy without being insignificant.

Upon retirement in the spring of 2013, I began the technology catch-up essential to spreading my wings. My means of communicating has evolved, but my core mission/message remains constant: fostering connection, encouraging coping, cultivating greatness and preserving my followers\u2019 bloom and mine.

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