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When someone asks us to do something we don\u2019t want to do, we often say yes even though we want to say no, because we think that saying no will feel terrible. But my guest, Dr. Vanessa Patrick, says the opposite is true: we actually feel great when we say no.\n\nSo why do we have such a hard time doing so?\n\nToday on the show, Vanessa, who\u2019s the author of The Power of Saying No: The New Science of How to Say No that Puts You in Charge of Your Life, answers that question and more. She shares how to categorize the asks you get into quadrants to determine whether you should say yes or no to them. And she explains how to give an \u201cempowered refusal\u201d \u2014 a no that\u2019s phrased in a way that makes it less likely to create offense or pushback \u2014 so you can start saying no to the things that don\u2019t matter, and spend more of your time on the things that do.