#407: How to Overcome Nice Guy Syndrome

Published: May 22, 2018, 9:21 p.m.

We\u2019ve been told since we were little kids to \u201cBe nice.\u201d\nBut what if being nice isn\u2019t really that good and it\u2019s making you and those around you miserable?\nThat\u2019s the provocative argument my guest today makes. His name is Dr. Aziz\xa0Gazipura. He's a psychologist and founder of the Social Confidence Center. In his latest book,\xa0Not Nice, he makes the case that being nice is holding a lot of men back in their lives.\nWe begin the show by talking about what people think \u201cnice\u201d means, but how it usually plays out in reality. Dr. Aziz then digs into the issues that pop up over and over again in the lives of people pleasers, like anxiety, depression, anger, and resentment. We then discuss what the opposite of nice is, and no, it\u2019s not being a complete jerk. He then shares specific tactics the chronically nice can start using today to be more assertive, like saying no without feeling guilty, getting over feeling responsible for everyone\u2019s feelings, and stating your preferences.\nIf you\u2019re a chronic nice guy, this episode is for you.\nGet the full show notes at aom.is/notnice.