BROADCASTS.com

Published: May 16, 2019, 9 p.m.

I don\u2019t know if it has a pickle plugin\n\n

Salesforce synergizing at IBM and Red Hat, VMware buys Bitnami, and Linux Desktop market share analysis. Plus, pickles.

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Opening comments:

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• The intersection between business books and dog vomit.
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• Democracy sausage.
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• Cot\xe9 can\u2019t get extra pickles.
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• Let me close out this topic of pickles.
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• It\u2019s not Burger King.
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• Enterprise Salespeople don\u2019t get tattoos
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• T-shirt currency arbitrage.
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• Literally misspelled responsibility
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• Tacos and IT transformation
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• 7 layer burrito of IT transformation.
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• BSD and Linux are the same, right? (Don\u2019t email me.)
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• Don\u2019t watch Cot\xe9\u2019s old videos.
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• Did the cat walk on your keyboard?
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\n\nRelevant to your interests\n\n

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• VMware to acquire Bitnami:\n\n
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  • VMware\u2019s desires: \u201cUpon close, Bitnami will enable our customers to easily deploy application packages on any cloud\u2014 public or hybrid\u2014and in the most optimal format\u2014virtual machine (VM), containers and Kubernetes helm charts. Further, Bitnami will be able to augment our existing efforts to deliver a curated marketplace to VMware customers that offers a rich set of applications and development environments in addition to infrastructure software.\u201d
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  • Cot\xe9: so Bitnami is a thing that packages up software for you in (VMs?) containers and stuff, maybe with some Helm chart stuff for deploying to kubernetes? And a service that manages them in EC2?
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  • Jay@451: \u201cThe acquisition will also help VMware support applications in various forms \u2013 including VMs, containers and Kubernetes Helm charts \u2013 across the different infrastructures. With Bitnami, VMware is also positioned to support ISVs and open source software components with Bitnami's catalog of curated, secured, certified components.\u201d
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  • \u201cVMware says it has acquired Bitnami for its multi-cloud competency and its Kubernetes expertise. VMware's acquisitions of CloudVelox, Heptio and CloudHealth have signaled its appetite for multi-cloud and Kubernetes.\u201d
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  • The New Stack coverage: \u201cMonocular, a service described by Bitnami as an open source search and discovery frontend for Helm Chart repositories.\u201d
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  • https://thenewstack.io/vmware-to-acquire-bitnami-the-app-marketplace-platform-and-container-packager/
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• Holy high street, Sainsbury's! Have you forgotten Bezos' bunch are the competition?\n\n
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  • Cot\xe9\u2019s collection of interesting bits, including:
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  • \u201cThis was effectively taking a WebSphere e-commerce monolith with an Oracle RAC database, and moving it, and modularising it, and putting it into AWS.\u201d
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  • \u201c\u2019Today, we run about 80 per cent of our groceries online with EC2, and 20 per cent is serverless.\u2019 In total, the company migrated more than 7TB of data into the cloud. As a result, or so Jordan claimed, the mart spends 30 per cent less on infrastructure, and regularly sees a 70-80 per cent improvement in performance of interactions on the website and batch processing.\u201d
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  • Australian $50 bills
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• Symantec CEO Greg Clark steps down, stock drops
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• GitHub Package Registry: Your packages, at home with their code\n\n
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  • JFrog and Sonatype watch out
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• How Windows and Chrome quietly made 2019 the year of Linux on the desktop\n\n
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  • It\u2019s time for another installment of Cot\xe9\u2019s Pedantry on Market Share Analysis (tm).
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  • Windows ships a Linux in a nifty VM.
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  • Chromebook market share was ~13% in Gartner\u2019s 2016Q4 estimates (based on 9.4m Chromebooks shipped out of 72.6m laptops total).
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  • Meanwhile, Gartner estimates that something like 2bn mobile devices (phones and tablets) were shipped in 2016. Gartner said shipments for \u201cPCs, tablets and mobile phones\u201d was 2.33bn in 2016 (if I read the press release right - something around those numbers).
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  • \u2026if you run-rate the Chromebook Q4 (which is very kind since Christmas and corporate end-of-year spending is in Q4), you get 2016 shipments of 37.6m Chromebooks. So, out of all types of computing devices, Chromebooks are, like 37.6m out of 2.3bn, or ~2%, right?
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  • Clearly: LINUX DESKTOP VICTORY! (I guess you could throw MacOS in there, but those who\u2019d care say that was BSD or something, right? Even if you do throw them in and do *nix market share, what\u2019s it like? Gartner says 2018Q4 Apple share was 7.2%, so add in Chromebooks and we\u2019re at 9.2% - round it up for shits and giggles, and we\u2019re at 10%. That anything?)
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  • iOS - FreeBSD?
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• Google now lists playable podcasts in search results
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• ParkMyCloud is Now Part of Turbonomic - ParkMyCloud
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• Amazon\u2019s Away Teams laid bare: How AWS's hivemind of engineers develop and maintain their internal tech\n\n
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  • It\u2019s the new Spotify Culture!
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• Oppressive countries used a newly-discovered WhatsApp flaw to spy on activists
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• The red hot 'FAANG' trade is officially over, now bet on your fellow 'MAAN'
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• FOSDEM 2019 - The clusterfuck hidden in the Kubernetes code base
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• Microsoft warns wormable Windows bug could lead to another WannaCry\n\n
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  • Suggested headline: \u201cWutzit! Washington Windows Wunderkin Wonder Why Worms WannaCry\u201d
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• Google replaces its Bluetooth security keys because they can be accessed by nearby attackers
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• New secret-spilling flaw affects almost every Intel chip since 2011
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• Google is about to have a lot more ads on phones
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• Donald Trump is short-circuiting the electronics industry
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• IBM reps can sell IBM and Red Hat: \u2018in the field, "IBM sales guys will get comped on Red Hat products, but our sales guys will only get comped on Red Hat products."\u2019
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\n\nNonsense\n\n

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• World\u2019s Most Expensive Coffee Costs $75 A Cup; Now Being Sold In Southern California
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\n\nSponsors\n\n

To learn more or to try SolarWinds Papertrail free for 14 days, go to papertrailapp.com/sdt and make troubleshooting fun again.

\n\nConferences, et. al.\n\n

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• ALERT! DevOpsDays Discount - DevOpsDays MSP, August 6th to 7th, $50 off with the code SDT2019.
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• 2019, a city near you: The 2019 SpringOne Tours are posted. Cot\xe9 will be speaking at many of these, hopefully all the ones in EMEA. They\u2019re free and all about programming and DevOps things. Coming up in: Paris (May 23rd & 24th), San Francisco (June 4th & 5th), Atlanta (June 13th & 14th)\u2026and back to a lot of US cities.
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• ChefConf 2019 May 20-23. Matt\u2019s speaking!
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• ChefConf London 2019 June 19-20
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• Monktoberfest, Oct 3rd and 4th - CFP now open.
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\n\nListener Feedback\n\n

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• Tom from Schiermonnikooglaan in The Netherlands tell us \u201cThanks for the awesome podcasts\u201d and we sent him laptop stickers.
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\n\nSDT news & hype\n\n

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• Join us in Slack.
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• Send your postal address to stickers@softwaredefinedtalk.com and we will send you free laptop stickers!
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• Follow us on Twitter, Instagram or LinkedIn
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• Listen to the Software Defined Interviews Podcast. Check out the back catalog.
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• Brandon built the Quick Concall iPhone App and he wants you to buy it for $0.99.
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\n\nRecommendations\n\n

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• Cot\xe9: my most recent stump-speech recording; UK GDS book, Digital Transformation at Scale. If you like #exegesis stuff, check out this interview Cot\xe9 did with Derrick Harris. Also, buy my book, fools! Get that other one for free. Use the code sdt for the next week to get it for $5.
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• Matt: Sending money internationally? Get yourself some TransferWise.\n\n
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  • Planet Money podcast: How Uncle Jamie Broke Jeopardy
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  • Semi-anti-recommendation: The Wandering Earth
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• Brandon: \n\n
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  • Jonathan on Netflix.
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  • DameWare SSH Movie Trailer vs. MSFT Terminal Video.\n
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Outro: Burger King commercial, 1974.

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