Welcome to episode #156! Matt and Braden clarify the difference between sexual arousal and desire and explain why knowing the difference matters.
Arousal is a bodily reaction
Sexual arousal is a natural thing that happens in healthy bodies. We often gets aroused as a response to touch because this is how God made us. We might get aroused by something that we don't have sexual desire towards. Knowing that there is a difference matters because otherwise, we might think that we sexually desire a person or thing that has gotten us aroused. In reality, sexual desire is separate that a simple bodily response due to arousal.
Arousal is a bad leader
Listening to our sexual arousal to determine our behaviour is a recipe for disaster. This is what animals with no impulse control do, but God has given us the ability to withhold acting on arousal.
Pursuing sexual encounters simply because we're aroused creates confusion when our body feels momentarily satisfied, but our mind and heart feel a heavy nagging feeling that comes from stepping outside of what God says is best.
Sexual desire can be godly or perverted
When we spend so much time acting on arousal, we might start to believe that our sexual desires all revolve around the fetishes that we see in pornography or in other people. In reality, God has put healthy sexual desires in each of us. To live these desires out, we need to know what desires come from God and what comes from our mistakes or cultural influences in our lives.
Sexual desires are from God and shouldn't lead us into shame, but rather into a freedom in our soul. This will help us understand that arousal isn't our leader, but that the Holy Spirit can guide us to act on our godly sexual desires in one way or another.
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Podcast Hosts
BRADEN HAFNER
Braden is the Regional Director in Alberta for FamilyLife Canada. He has been married for 14 years to his wife Kristen, and they live in Edmonton, Alberta. He is passionate about seeing marriages grow and thrive, and helping couples move to a deeper oneness with one another and with God. FamilyLife Canada has a variety of resources and events to help you and your spouse take your marriage to the next level. See what would benefit you at www.familylifecanada.com
MATT CLINE
Matt and his wife Louise raise their little guys, David and Oliver, in Edmonton, Alberta. He is honoured to do what he can to tackle the epidemic of pornography and sexual perversion in every way possible. Seeing lives and marriages get free and experience the love of God in profound ways is what drives him every day. He leads Restored Ministries, is a certified speaker and coach for the John Maxwell Team, and formerly played hockey in the WHL and for Hockey Canada. You can visit www.restoredministries.ca.