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On the podcast this time, Steven and Sean are joined by extra special guest, Greg Vander Velde (of our A Low Down Dirty Shame episode fame), as we all become the prehistoric animal raging inside us all with the Brendan Steere film from 2018, The VelociPastor.

Have you ever had an experience, let\u2019s call it a \u201choly\u201d experience (to stay on brand), that makes you question so much of what you know? You think you understand movies, what makes them good, and why the bad ones are just not worth your time. Your life is running smoothly in one happy direction and then BAM! you\u2019re blindsided by a creation so unique that your entire life needs to change.

You\u2019re the modern Paul, becoming all Jesus-loving while on the road to Damascus. And what does it? Why, a stupid movie about a priest who can transform, seemingly at will, into a large dinosaur and must defeat loads of questionably sourced ninjas while gettin\u2019 it on with the aforementioned hooker-doctor-lawyer.

Yep, like a tale right out of the Bible. It\u2019s so universal!

Like many of the other terrible movies we\u2019ve watched for this show, we recommend that you view this with a friend. Somehow, there\u2019s some high-level movie-making going on here, but that\u2019s all sandwiched between two hearty loaves of absolute nonsense. The weird bits go down smoother when you\u2019ve got someone else to enjoy the journey with.

This being a B-movie bonus episode, listen in to discover how we rated this\u2026 masterpiece? Did we consider it a blunder of a film? Was it a flunder? Or perchance did we bestow upon it the highest ranking we have: brilliant?

(Recorded on September 20, 2021)

Links to Stuff We Mentioned:

The VelociPastor - IMDb

The VelociPastor trailer - YouTube

Quentin Tarantino - IMDb

The VelociPastor Trailer (2011 short film) - YouTube

Clint Eastwood - IMDb

The Last Airbender (2010) - IMDb

Avatar: The Last Airbender (TV Series 2005\u20132008) - IMDb

M. Night Shyamalan - IMDb

Lady in the Water (2006) - IMDb

The Happening (2008) - IMDb

Split (2016) - IMDb

Glass (2019) - IMDb

Black Dynamite (2009) - IMDb

Sharknado (TV Movie 2013) - IMDb

Scrubs (TV Series 2001\u20132010) - IMDb

Greg Cohan - IMDb

Chris Evans - IMDb

Rubber (2010) - IMDb

Killer Sofa (2019) - IMDb

Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2 (2004) - IMDb

Viral Hit \u2018The VelociPastor\u2019 to Get LGBTQ+ Vampire Horror Sequel - The Hollywood Reporter

Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988)