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On the podcast this week, Steven and Sean are maybe traveling back in time, but maybe not, but also probably definitely actually traveling back in time to save the lives of the people we love in the 2012 film from Colin Trevorrow, Safety Not Guaranteed.

Yeah, we\u2019re definitely traveling back in time. Unless we\u2019re not.

Was anyone else as surprised by the way this movie ended as we were? Sure, there\u2019s still the question of what happened to Darius and Kenneth, but that shouldn\u2019t be enough to yuck your yum, as they say. For my money, they rode off into the time-traveling sunset, lived happily ever after, had a wedding where the color theme was black, and had loads of weird babies. That\u2019s just the sort of outcome I want to imagine. What can I say? I guess I\u2019m a romantic at heart.

But yeah, who would have ever guessed that a film with as much saccharine quirk as this one would have an ending that would make us gasp out loud? Time travel\u2014shouldn\u2019t work, right? What evidence do we have that it\u2019s a real thing that can happen? As far as I know, there\u2019s exactly zero evidence to support it, hence the awed gasps we gave.

What are you going to do if you\u2019re Kenneth, though? You\u2019ve got a pair of possibly government agents hot on your tail and you\u2019ve given yourself a mission to save someone\u2019s life. There\u2019s no other alternative but making a real, working time machine.

Yep, you read that right. I\u2019m saying that the real reason we don\u2019t have fully functioning time travel devices is that we\u2019re not motivated enough to make it happen. We haven\u2019t put in the requisite blood, sweat, and tears. If only we could get off our butts and invent the most life-changing technology in the history of all humanity. Damn Millennials with their laziness and whining! Why don\u2019t you pull yourself up by your bootstraps or some other impossible, nonsensical platitude?

Until that day finally happens, I guess we\u2019re stuck with this fun gem of a movie. It\u2019s got a lot going for it. There\u2019s a definite charm to its fairly low-stakes story. You\u2019d have to try very hard not to fall in love with it. If you don\u2019t, though, you can rest assured that I\u2019ll be traveling back in time to help convince you otherwise. You know, when I can get around to making my dang time travel machine.

(Recorded on May 24, 2021)

Links to Stuff We Mentioned:

Safety Not Guaranteed - IMDb

Safety Not Guaranteed trailer - YouTube

Office Space - IMDb

How I Met Your Mother - IMDb

Turducken - Wikipedia

(The hell is this monstrosity? Humanity, you\u2019ve gone too far with this mess!)

Waiting\u2026 - IMDb

Ryan Reynolds - IMDb

Luis Guzm\xe1n - IMDb

Aubrey Plaza - IMDb

Mark Duplass - IMDb

Jake Johnson - IMDb

Karan Soni - IMDb

Deadpool - IMDb

Archer - IMDb

Garden State - IMDb

Shrek - IMDb

Django Unchained - IMDb