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My guest today shares her personal story of severe postpartum anxiety and depression while appearing in a high-functioning state to those around her. It is important for us to hear real-life accounts from those who look like \u201ceverything is fine.\u201d Join us for a closer look from this unique perspective.\nCaitlin Shadek is a mom of three boys, ages 3, 6, and 8. She is a lawyer who has practiced as a commercial litigator for the past 14 years, but she recently left her job to attend Rutgers University School of Social Work to obtain her master\u2019s degree in social work. Her desire is to work with women with perinatal mood and anxiety disorders and help bridge the gap in their care between the OB/GYN and the pediatrician. Caitlin felt that lapse in care firsthand when she suffered from severe postpartum depression and anxiety after her first two pregnancies and entered a hospital treatment program when her third son was a toddler. Her own experiences have been the impetus behind her career change and desire to help treat and advocate for better women\u2019s mental health care. She is currently an intern at a practice specializing in infertility and prenatal/postnatal counseling.\xa0\n\nShow Highlights:\n\nHow Caitlin\u2019s story begins about nine years ago with her first pregnancy and the immediate feelings of dread and panic she felt at the moment of birth\n\nWhy she was afraid to go home from the hospital with her new baby\n\nHow wearing a catheter for six weeks added to the anxiety she felt about caring for her baby\xa0\n\nHow dark thoughts plagued her\u2013but she never shared them with anyone and pretended that everything was fine\n\nHow she began therapy and medication when her son was about nine months old, but the dark thoughts and depression continued\n\nWhy she wanted a second child\u2013despite the serious issues in her life (including self-harming behaviors)\n\nHow she felt guilt about continuing her medication while pregnant and experienced postpartum depression AGAIN\n\nHow Caitlin went back to work and put on her \u201chigh-functioning postpartum depression face\u201d\n\nHow her struggles continued into her pregnancy with her third son, and things felt a little different after his birth\n\nHow the pandemic threw their family into survival mode with everyone at home together\n\nWhy Caitlin worked very hard to put on a good face until everything culminated in December 2021\u2013and she knew she was NOT OK\n\nHow Caitlin\u2019s therapist sent her to the ER during an intense COVID resurgence because of her depression and suicidal thoughts\n\nWhy Caitlin agreed to go to the psychiatric floor for treatment\u2013and then tried to change her mind\n\nHow she was released to go home and enrolled in an outpatient DBT program that changed her life\n\nHow Caitlin decided what her next phase of work would be\u2013to become a social worker and provide other mothers with the help she had needed\n\nWhy maternal mental health falls between the OB/GYN and pediatrician and is often overlooked\n\nWhat Caitlin would say to someone in a similar situation\n\n\nResources:\nConnect with Caitlin: Instagram\nVisit www.postpartum.net for resources and support!\xa0\nVisit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/ for information on the grief course.\xa0\xa0\nVisit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today!