BROADCASTS.com

So what is a girl to do when she's kinda sorta, you know, DONE with her husband and baby and wants to spend more time with her daddy-figure lover?\xa0 Well - according to some (not us! don't look at us!), you do what Cynthia Knox (allegedly) did - pay to have the ball 'n' chain slaughtered and drown the kid yourself.\xa0 Oh.\xa0 And then when the in-laws take exception to your plan and come after you, you simply move to another state, steal a dead girl's identity and become a...wait for it...licensed yacht captain!\xa0 In a story almost impossible to fathom Melissa unravels the tale of the very unlucky Harold "Skeeter" Lyerla, who married the woman of his dreams only to meet his doom - along with that of their baby daughter - (allegedly) because she was more into older men and her dreams were - darn it! - just a lot bigger than his - and required the proceeds from a life insurance policy to make them come true.\xa0 Allegedly.