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Nick Karras embodies all the qualities you want from your sexologist. He\u2019s open, understanding, easygoing, and observant. He is also the author of Passionate High: A Guide to Using Cannabis for Better Sex and Creativity, who has spent years studying how cannabis affects the brain. We caught up with Nick to talk all things sex and cannabis.

You\u2019ve studied the interaction of sex and cannabis for a few years now. What were some of the most surprising things you found?

Throughout my research we were asking subjects questions like, why do you smoke? What are the mental effects? We looked at age, financial demographics, everything. What blew me away is that a very small percentage of people across the board were using cannabis for sex, but they were using it for everything else. It was interesting to me because I never thought of it as a creative outlet\u2013I had always used it for sexual experiences only. But I was hearing from musicians, artists, and all kinds of people who would tell me \u201ca small amount of this strain and my creativity comes out.\u201d

I had accountants tell me that their accuracy rate went way up when they took a small amount of a particular strain. I had a neuroscientist tell me that before he did surgery, he would take a small amount of tincture to calm himself down. When he was working on a brain afterward, his senses felt more alive and nimble. Those fascinating results are what sent me down the path of wanting to know what cannabis does to the brain. I wanted to know why these people were having all these different effects and how we can control those effects.

And what effects did you find to be most consistent?

I call it the \u201cbouquet of cognitive effects.\u201d There are five features [that are consistent when consuming cannabis]: hyperfocus, pattern recognition, enhanced imagination, increased empathy and episodic memory retrieval. So, let\u2019s start with hyperfocus. People refer to it as the zen effect\u2013it\u2019s when you get into a zone and you\u2019re more present. Then, there\u2019s enhanced pattern recognition. This is important for couples because in order to move forward on a problem, you first have to start seeing patterns. When I am coaching couples with sexual issues, sometimes a partner says something that subconsciously triggers the other without either of them knowing it, and it\u2019s the same word or phrase every time. By tapping into pattern recognition, you are more aware of what\u2019s going on.

To me, the increased imagination is the best part of cannabis\u2013you see the world differently. I love when I\u2019m laying with a lover, smoking some cannabis after incredible sex. We lay there and being high, you come up with these crazy ideas, like, \u201chey, lets move to Rome!\u201d Of course, the next morning over breakfast you would look at each other and say, \u201cyeah, we were stoned and that was silly.\u201d But some of the stuff is good! That\u2019s why I tell clients that when you are high and you get these lofty ideas, actually write those ideas down and ask yourself where they came from. Maybe they are things you actually want to do\u2013I have personally based a lot of my life decisions on stuff that would come from that space.

Enhanced episodic memory takes you back to the past. For instance, maybe you get high and hear a song you listened to when you were a teenager. You click back to that moment, you go to that place, and you feel that memory with a lot of detail and vividness. For instance, a lot of couples who see me say they want to return to the feeling they had at the beginning, when they first met. So, I\u2019d suggest to design a little ceremony.

Get pictures out of when you first met. Lay them around you and your partner. Second, dim the lights to create a romantic atmosphere. Then, maybe put on the music you listened to when you first met or made love. Once you consume a little cannabis and start looking at these pictures or telling stories, trust me\u2013you get back into it. The body holds a lot of knowledge and that\u2019s why these visuals, smells, and sounds will bring memories back. Cannabis can help ignite those imprints on your memory and bring out those stories that the body holds.

I love the idea of creating your own ceremony for a more connected experience. I think it\u2019s so important to consume with intention, particularly if you want to access the benefits of the plant.

Yeah, it\u2019s just another wonderful tool for addressing relationship issues when they come up. If you have an issue, sit down together with that issue, write down what you want to talk about, and what you want to put into the experience. Do the ceremony by getting a bit of a high going, then address the issue and write down ideas. With your enhanced empathy and increased imagination, things look more possible.

If you repeat that four or five times it\u2019s usually enough to change a train of thought so it comes naturally to you, without the help of cannabis. The nice part about cannabis is that you can use it for problem solving, then put it away until another problem comes up. Some people think I\u2019m insinuating to only have sex while high and I am absolutely not. It\u2019s just another way to think differently and change the way you are seeing.

Flowertown Interview with a sexologist

And what about the \u201cincreased empathy\u201d effect of consuming cannabis? You say, \u201ca highlight of the high is empathy.\u201d Can you expand on that phenomenon and how cannabis brings out empathy?

When I was doing my research, I kept hearing that. So I wondered, how was this possible? Where does empathy really come from? I assumed we are just born with empathy, but that\u2019s not true. Empathy is taught\u2013it\u2019s a social construct. Do some research on empathy and you\u2019ll find out that it\u2019s something we learn. In my opinion, cannabis wakes us up and slows us down, so we are better able to walk in each other\u2019s shoes. There\u2019s even a growing movement of mothers who microdose cannabis in order to relate better to their children. These mothers say they feel more compassion and more empathy for their child after consuming a small amount of cannabis.

That\u2019s fascinating! Speaking of microdosing, can you talk about why you say \u201cmicrodosing is everything\u2019 when it comes to cannabis and intimacy?

In my book, I give three classifications of a high: light touch (level 1), classic high (level 2), and stoned (level 3). Microdosing allows you to take a small amount and then sit with it. My preference for couples starting out is to begin with flower. It\u2019s easier to get a gram of a bunch of different strains (you can get a gram [in California] for 7 or 8 bucks now) of flower than with other methods. Ingest them, see what you like and adjust accordingly. Within five minutes you can feel the cognitive effects, then take note of what you like and dislike. In the bedroom, play with microdosing so that you find that happy place before you get all the way to the \u201cstoned\u201d level. Most people go all the way to stoned, but they are missing all the cognitive benefits when they do.

What would you suggest for a couple that react very differently to the same strain or dose of cannabis?

When I was doing my research I would provide what I like to call \u201cdoobettes,\u201d where I would get different strains and then I would roll these tiny little joints (just enough for two evenings of microdosing). We would try indicas, sativas, hybrids\u2013and I was surprised by how many couples picked different strains. If you think about everyone in your life, you\u2019ll notice a lot of people will take anxiety, frustration, and worry and put it into different places. Some people will put it in their heads; they\u2019ll get migraines. Others will put it in their body; they\u2019ll have gastrointestinal issues. We all hold our problems differently. And usually in a couple, we generally pair up with our opposites. So for many, the best strain for them isn\u2019t going to be the same strain as their partner.

So yes, the couples I researched usually ended up with their own strain. The amount also varies, so one person could need to smoke 2 or 3 times as much as the other one to get the same effect. For couples like this, I suggest that on different (non-sexual) evenings, people should experiment and go on a personal journey by themselves. Play with different strains. It\u2019s like asking which essential oils work best for you. What works to calm you down or stimulate you is going to be different from what works for another person.

In experiencing better sex with your partner, you speak a lot about embracing the sensual side of yourself. Can you talk both about your definition of sensuality and why it is so important to tap into your personal sensuality before trying to connect with someone else?

We live in a world right now that values competition over compassion, strength over wisdom, greed over generosity, and conformity over novelty. These priorities put us in our head\u2013they take us out of our body and out of our heart. To me, most illnesses or problems with people are because they have lost that mind-body connection.

When clients come in, I always ask, where do you hold more knowledge? Your body or your mind? People always say the mind, but I disagree. The body actually holds more knowledge. Somebody famous once said, \u201cthe mind will never be able to make you happy.\u201d The mind was created to problem solve. The mind was created to protect you so that you don\u2019t get eaten by another creature. Your body is what gives you ease. Your body is what gives you joy. People have lost that connection.

People ask me, \u201cwhy do I have no desire or feel any sexuality?\u201d I ask them to tell me about the passion in their life. What are they doing that\u2019s passionate? What are they doing for their body? What takes them out of their mind? They usually look at me blankly and respond, \u201cwell, I have to work all day, then I go home, etc.\u201d Well, if you are not being sensual in any way, how do you expect yourself to be sexual?

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