Are You an Over or Under Functioner? A Hilarious and Helpful Guide to YOUR Stress Style
b'At some point, the you-know-what is going to hit the fan.\\n\\nAnd it happened to me the other morning when I was driving my husband to his colonoscopy.\\n\\nThis is the first episode without a video version because I recorded it from my iPhone after dropping my husband off at the hospital.\\n\\nI promised to take you into my life; I just didn\'t expect it to be as a stressful situation was unfolding in real time.\\n\\nWhen it comes to dealing with stress, best-selling psychotherapist and researcher Harriet Lerner says that being an underfunctioner or an overfunctioner is your patterned response to dealing with the alarm in your body.\\n\\nIt probably doesn\\u2019t surprise you that I am what researchers call an "Overfunctioner." \\n\\nMy husband, Chris, is an "Underfunctioner," especially on those days when he\\u2019s on the way to a medical procedure.\\n\\nAnd learning the way YOU react to stress is a game-changer for your relationships.\\n\\nAn overfunctioner like me allows the alarm in my body to take over in stressful situations, becoming triggered and anxious.\\n\\nAnd the only way to calm the alarm is to bark orders, manage the phone calls, organize the activities, make the appointments, plan the meals, and take on all the responsibilities because it gives me a sense of control.\\n\\nIt may be my superpower, but it also makes me a royal pain in the a$$ and takes away the chance for Chris to feel empowered.\\n\\nThe way Chris deals with stress is more chill and very methodical, which frustrates the hell out of me.\\n\\nListen today as we work through these two different ways of dealing with a stressful family situation so that you can understand your own approach better and, more importantly, how to ask for what you need from others before you drive them nuts.\\n\\nAnd if you\\u2019re ready to take the next right step to live your life with more confidence and no regrets, this is your time.\\n\\nSign up for my exclusive signature course, Launch with Mel Robbins. It\\u2019s available for registration only through May 4, so grab your spot today!\\n\\nLearn all the exciting details and sign up here!\\n\\nXo Mel \\n \\nIn this episode, you\\u2019ll learn:\\n\\n3:00: Let me set the scene for you before everything started blowing up.\\n4:30: Here\\u2019s how I set myself up to fail the night before.\\n7:15: Then life kicks in big time and cue the mom guilt flood gates.\\n10:40: Here\\u2019s what overfunctioning stress looks like in real life. Can you relate?\\n14:30: If you don\\u2019t catch yourself in this state, your relationships pay the price.\\n23:00: Chris nails the good, the bad, and the ugly side of overfunctioning. \\n24:15: I thank Harriet Lerner for her research that helps me understand myself.\\n26:30: Here\\u2019s how my anxiety sees my husband\\u2019s \\u201cunderfunctioning\\u201d response to stress.\\n28:30: And this is how Chris sees my \\u201coverfunctioning\\u201d response.\\n32:00: Have a partner who handles stress differently? Here\\u2019s how to support each other.\\n38:00: Chris explains what happens in HIS brain and body when he\\u2019s stressed.\\n42:30: Holy mackerel, I just realized I never stopped to do this in my stress episode.\\n46:00: This is a tool our couple\\u2019s therapist gave us that really helps us to see each other.\\n \\nDisclaimer'