Donna Tashjian is helping you to turn your baggage into luggage

Published: Dec. 5, 2021, 8:02 p.m.

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Donna wants to tell you that you were designed for greatness.

Don\'t let the pain and disappointments of life define you.

If you let them, they will make you a victim.

Instead, focus on how powerful and talented you are.

You possess an inner strength that is only waiting to be tapped into.

You have been given a gift from above that can change your life for the better.

Seek out an answer to the great question: "who am I?

Connect with Donna today! https://www.ivibrantliving.com/

Transcript below is machine edited by otter.ai

Donna Tashjian 1:53
Oh, that\'s a big question.

Unknown Speaker 0:00
Your journey has been an interesting one up to hear you\'ve questioned so much more than those around you. You\'ve even questioned yourself as to how you could have grown into these thoughts. Am I crazy? When did I begin to think differently? Why do people in general appear so limited in this process? Rest assured, you are not alone. The world is slowly waking up to what you already know inside yet can\'t quite verbalize. Welcome to the spiritual dough podcast, the show that answers the questions you never even knew to ask, but knew the answers to questions about you this world the people in it? And most importantly, how do I proceed now moving forward? We don\'t have all the answers but we sure do love living in the question. Time for another head of spiritual dub with your host Brandon Handley. Let\'s get right into today\'s episode.

Brandon Handley 0:40
Hey there spiritual dope. I\'m on here today with Donna task Jen. She is an empowering Life Mastery coach, she is down to earth inspirational speaker that has been speaking for over 20 years. She is the founder vibrant living international author and host of the you were designed for greatness podcast. She\'s been married to her wonderful husband for over 36 years, mother to three and grandmother. She loves flowers time in nature, and you will always see her with a cup of tea was you have a cup of tea there right now? I do. She has a passion to help you reach your full potential. So Donna, thanks for being on here today. By we\'re able to connect. I usually like me to usually like to start these off with the whole idea that um, you and I, you know, we\'re vessels for Source Energy, right that uh, you know, the you know, that whatever messages coming through on this podcast today with the conversation you and I have you and I will hear that. But like somebody on the other side, somebody listening and tuning in is going to get a message that they need to receive. And it can be delivered through you through this podcast in this moment. What is that message?

Donna Tashjian 1:56
Um, the main point that it\'s what my podcast name is, is helping people know they were designed for greatness and really stepping in and walking in that. Yeah, that\'s the main thing I want people to know. It was just

Brandon Handley 2:13
so I mean, what does that look like for you? How did you? Let\'s kind of walk our way to that. How did you come to find yourself to even recognize that for yourself? And then how did you and we\'ll move forward from there?

Donna Tashjian 2:26
Yeah, the way my journey began, is really a pain point. As far as starting back, when I was 14, someone hurt me and I became pregnant. And so at the age of 15, I had a little girl, and I raised her. And so there was a lot of times where I was alone, there was no one else to rely on. And all I had was my faith. And that\'s where in that pain moment is when things really began to have. I built my foundation, I\'ll put it that way, to being able to learn how to trust in God and my spiritual walk and learning how to create who I was really designed to be. Through that process, there was all kinds of labels that are put on us and I had them all kinds of labels we put on ourselves. And all through that processes, like who am I really and learning how to discover who we really are. So that and that is a journey, who we are in our 20s is different than who we are in our 30s and so forth. And it\'s it\'s a journey as you discover who you really are and the gift you are to the world. Yeah.

Brandon Handley 4:06
Yeah, the the whole idea of, you know, it sounds to me like you had faith at a young age. Is that Is that true? I did. So that faith was Christianity was something else. It

Donna Tashjian 4:19
was Christianity, it was Christianity. Yes. And

Brandon Handley 4:23
do Lean you really leaned into that, with the pain that you were going through? Sounds like it doesn\'t sound like you had a whole lot of other. I don\'t want to say it doesn\'t sound like you didn\'t have other support, but it sounded like that was what you relied on the most.

Donna Tashjian 4:38
Yes, there wasn\'t a lot of support. And yes, it was something that I relied on that. And as I have gone forward is is learning that how to make sense out of tragedy. One of my programs that I work with some of them My clients is called Turning your baggage into luggage. And so how to make sense out of the pain and our disappointments in our life? How do we have them because I talk about making them become luggage so that you can create the life you dreamed. And so some of the worst days of my life have brought me to wonderful, incredible places that I wouldn\'t have had, without those painful moments and learning how to understand that. I mean, it doesn\'t take, to me anyway, it doesn\'t take much to see that there\'s something bigger than us at work. I couldn\'t I mean, the human body in itself, in all of its magnificence, it couldn\'t have just happened. That\'s my belief. And so learning that there is something bigger at work, and through all of the things that happen to our life, there can be something good out of it, if you look for it,

Brandon Handley 6:05
for sure, but you know, I think that even you, you may agree, right? That if you go back to your 1516 year old self, and you\'re in all this pain, sometimes when you\'re in the midst of it, and you haven\'t had a bunch of life experience, for sure, then you could definitely crumble and fall and you know, you don\'t see the you don\'t see those lessons sometimes when you\'re in it. Right. I think that that can be a real challenge for us as as you and I can see I you see the lessons in the tragedy, you see the light and somebody is in the middle of the tragedy. Yeah. How do you before we can go there? I want to just, you know, Yeah, agreed, right? It\'s something bigger than URI. Some is at play here, the human body doing what it does, I always make the statement that if you, you don\'t know how to make your own blood, you don\'t know how to grow your own hair, you don\'t all these things that you\'re you are doing from within?

Donna Tashjian 7:04
You can\'t make yourself breathe either.

Brandon Handley 7:07
Right? Right. So I mean, these are things you go to sleep and like, I wouldn\'t trust myself to do something else with it play. Something else is a play. And, and even that, like the trillions of trillions of different parts, and I have a challenge sometimes, you know, pulling three pieces like eggs, toast and cheese and making a sandwich out of it, you know, and so imagine what it really takes to make all of this work the way that it does. That\'s great. Absolutely. I think it\'s a great point. So I mean, I want to I want to hit on that. What are some of the tools that you will so you find you find yourself, you know, you got you have these tragic moments, you rely on your faith where you know, where along the path? Do you begin to see yourself as having this greatness to explore and share?

Donna Tashjian 7:56
I think it was, I think for me, it was an ongoing journey to know that there was that there was something that more than I than I could see at the moment that there was something bigger there. I think that\'s been a journey to be able to discover. And I know I know that at that age, and in through my years, I would not have articulated it, that I was designed for greatness. But I had this knowing that there was something bigger for me to do. And not sure how exactly to get there. The way that I articulate it today, of course, is not the what I would have said in the middle of the moment, I just knew that there was more. And there was also this feeling is blaming on my hair color, perhaps but I\'m going to prove you wrong. And lowing that might have been a blonde. Yeah.

Brandon Handley 8:59
I mean, look, I get it right I absolutely the ongoing journey and not being able to express this connection and this feeling in the sense that you know that there\'s something greater out there. And my guess is as you\'re kind of coming along through your life, it\'s like you couldn\'t even really put a finger on it. Right? And regardless of whether or not you know, that is there is where do you feel like you first really began to be able to put a finger on it, so that you were able to begin to express it and what did that look like?

Donna Tashjian 9:37
I have done quite a few different things in my life that I think we\'re building to the place that I am today. But vibrant living and the being a Life Mastery coach in this capacity is when I began to really realize it and that wasn\'t till I that I would articulate it this way was about 10 years. ago. So it hasn\'t really been I, I\'ve always had this knowing that there was something but I didn\'t know what and when I began to be able to put a plan to it and strategy to it that I began to really realize the magnitude of how we were designed for greatness. And my greatness doesn\'t look like yours. It looks like me and me being me is actually what\'s so great. It\'s learning how to be who we are, without having to have people approve of us or having worrying about our performance, or worrying about all of that. It\'s just being who you are with the gifts because you are important. And so learning to be able to articulate that in a way as hell and help others is my sweet spot.

Brandon Handley 11:00
I love that the you know, the idea was, first of all right, 10 years ago, I mean, that\'s fair, fairly decent amount of time that you\'ve been doing this now this work, right, and kind of uncovering it and developing this Life Mastery coach, aspect. And I think that that\'s a, it\'s a long journey. Right now, to your point, you, you spent most of your life working your way up to there. And as you step into this space, you begin to understand that there\'s so much that you have to uncover, right, these tragedies that you talked about being able to look at them as lessons later. What, what got you what was said to you, what was it that said to you, hey, I want to get into coaching. I mean,

Donna Tashjian 11:44
well, I have always had it before, I would have called it mentoring. I\'ve been doing that for over 20 years. So there\'s always been that capacity there. But it wasn\'t full time. It was stuff that I was doing on the side. And so my it was one of those moments when I said, What do I want to do now that I\'m all grown up? What would I really love to do. And I had started a job at a nonprofit organization, which I worked at a lot of them started on my own, and thought that that would be the avenue to do the thing. But it was actually limiting. And now that I look back at it, but I had put all my eggs in that basket thinking it would be great. And me and the management did not get along, after a while. And so I was I was let go from that job. And so it was a moment of what do I really want to do. And so I did some deep soul searching. And that\'s when vibrant living, the clarity of the vision of coaching and helping people to step into their greatness to leave the pain and disappointment of the past behind and create the life they\'ve always dreamed was born.

Brandon Handley 13:01
So it\'s almost like there was a moment in there where he doesn\'t sound like you were fired, but doesn\'t sound like the job was extended for an ongoing length of time. Right? So there was a moment right there where you felt like you were in a place to serve and benefit others in this in this organization. And having that taken away. Again, this is an area where a lot of people could easily kind of shut down and and give up. Right? What was it? You know, in the question, line of questioning that you took to yourself what I really want what made you even want to continue to go forward and continue to serve what was?

Donna Tashjian 13:41
Well, there was a period of time where I was on the floor, so to speak, you know, it\'s like the rug has been pulled out from me. I doubted my value, all of the things that we do when those kinds of things happen is just wondering, What am I going to do and all of that. But it goes back to my faith again, because that\'s I went back to God and talk to him about it. And that\'s where I got my direction. And it wasn\'t a moment it was little steps. What about this? And what about that, and I just follow the steps. And just because I didn\'t know coaching was a thing 10 years ago. To me, it was a football coach. It was what I pictured when you said the word coach, and I\'m like, I am not that I will not scream at you. I will not do that. And so I didn\'t even know it was quote a thing. So it was a journey of step by step as I talked to God about what I should do next. Because ultimately, even when we\'re doing the self doubt that I don\'t have worth and that inner critic stuff that goes on. There\'s a part of us that knows that\'s not true. There\'s a part of us that knows there\'s something more than that. And so that\'s what I followed. And that\'s how I got here.

Brandon Handley 15:05
Let\'s talk about even listening to that, listening to the eating the small steps, right? Taking those small steps listening to your, you know, listening to God slash, I think a lot of the people that would tune in we call it like your inner guidance, your intuition, following your bliss, what, what gave you the strength to follow that? Right or not know, the strength is the right word. But I think you get what I\'m saying?

Donna Tashjian 15:37
I, I think so, um, there is our intuition, as you say it, I agree with intuition, it\'s a place that I believe God speaks to us. And people call it different things. Um, but I, I like, in my strength to coming from him, it\'s more than intuition. And for me, so that was a knowing and like I said, even though that there\'s the self doubt, we know, I believe we know there\'s something more for us, something that pulls, pulling us forward. It\'s bigger than us. Because everyone has something, an impact that they make, and it doesn\'t have to be what I\'m doing, or you\'re doing, it\'s whatever they need to be doing. That\'s in their heart. So I, that\'s, that\'s where my strength come from. I know where my strength comes from.

Brandon Handley 16:34
Yeah, I mean, it sounds like you don\'t have a doubt now. So when you decided that, hey, I\'m gonna do this vibrant living bit, I\'m gonna go ahead and move forward into it. And I\'m stepping into my greatness. I\'m helping others do the same. What was the reaction, say, of your family, people that were close to you? around that.

Donna Tashjian 16:57
Um, most of the people that were there around me the family is it\'s about time. You know, most people had saw that in we my daughter said, who is an adult now? said, Mom, there was always women sitting on the couch crying, and you are helping them. And that was one of her earlier memories, so that anybody that really knew me, it did surprise them less than it did me. Oh, what? What I had stepped into with this.

Brandon Handley 17:30
That\'s awesome. So is great sound sounds like there was some support there? Yes. And what about I always think about the idea of kind of stepping into this kind of work. And following your spiritual guidance, your guidance from God can be scary and intimidating for some was there any fear in in? Yeah, I mean, let\'s talk about that and get in passing through it.

Donna Tashjian 17:57
Oh, yeah. There\'s a constant feeling of what if this doesn\'t work. And wondering of being afraid of failure, afraid of, I guess not working is the best way I know how to describe it. And the one of the ways that got me through it is I got a coach to be able to help

Brandon Handley 18:21
you. You\'re a coach and you had a coach.

Donna Tashjian 18:25
If you have a coach and they don\'t have a coach, you need to change coaches

Brandon Handley 18:29
figure that out for sure. For sure.

Donna Tashjian 18:31
Everyone needs someone speaking into their life, and I got a coach that be a to be able to help me see what I couldn\'t see. That\'s one of the things that coach does is help you change your perspectives and help you see what you can\'t see. One of the best advice I got from my coach was to get up every day and proceed as if success was inevitable. When it didn\'t look like it would work when it didn\'t look like you knew what you were doing. I don\'t know how to do this. I\'ve never done this before. All of that stuff, when you start something new, was to get up every day and proceeded as success was inevitable. And that phrase, will there was others. But that particular phrase every day I did that. Now there\'ll be a couple of days that I wanted to stay in bed because I wouldn\'t think it wouldn\'t work. But almost every day, that was my choice to choose to believe it would work. That in itself brings a different outcome. So that\'s one of the best things is that get a coach

Brandon Handley 19:33
for a good coach. And and I love the idea to have Joe act as if, yes, I\'m going to act as if right just kind of success is inevitable. You\'re just walking your path, and as you said, trying to figure it out. Look, I don\'t know about you. I don\'t I don\'t pretend to believe or know that I\'ve had a past life so that I know what to do with this one. This You know, for all intents and purposes, this is my first go round. So I\'m doing my best. And you know, I think that if it comes to starting anyone bevor Devere, like you\'ve done with vibrant living. You\'ve made it this far, so why not?

Donna Tashjian 20:15
Yeah. All right. It didn\'t always look like it looks today, you know, when you\'re starting out, you know, Will anybody hire me as a coach? Those kind of feelings are always there. And, you know, what, if it\'s a problem that I don\'t know how to handle, or whatever it\'s it gets to be it can be scary anytime you start a new endeavor, but it doesn\'t, it doesn\'t look like that today.

Brandon Handley 20:40
Turned out. So I got to imagine that you did a little bit of let go and let God in your life, what\'s that look like for you?

Donna Tashjian 20:52
Let go and let God I\'m the difference between having to control everything. And that is actually for me, at least when I want to control everything, it\'s because of fear. And, therefore, when I am trying to fix everything and, and make everything work the way I think it should, that\'s fear based. And that doesn\'t have a very good outcome when we make decisions from that place. But let go and let God is doing the best that I can with what I can do and and leave the rest to him. That\'s what it means to me.

Brandon Handley 21:32
I like that. I like that. Definitely curious because again, you\'ve got a, a deep a deep faith and what you\'re doing. So when you\'re when you\'re teaching these people, when you\'re teaching your clients how to, you know, create luggage, what is it, let\'s walk through some of what that might look like. Let\'s say for example, I\'ve got some baggage and I want to create it in luggage, walk me through me walk me through the process.

Donna Tashjian 21:59
Alright, well, this isn\'t going to be done in the next couple minutes, just so you know that. But one of the steps is I alluded to before is I call it building our understanding muscle. And that is is that in any adversity, there is a gift. I call them gifts wrapped in sandpaper, baggage thinking when something adversity happens is this isn\'t fair. This isn\'t right. This isn\'t just somebody needs to pay. That\'s baggage thinking. And when you\'re thinking that you get stuck in the baggage to repackage it into luggage, you begin to say, I can\'t change it, it happened. I\'m going to use it to grow and become the best me I can be. So the first step is a gift wrapped in sandpaper. The second is learning to get support. The third is having compassion and forgiveness for others. that forgiveness is part of setting yourself free. So those are three steps to be able to build your understanding muscle. And that\'s one of the things simply and those could be talked about for a little while.

Brandon Handley 23:15
Yeah, I mean, first of all the visual of gifts being wrapped in sandpaper, not as visual, I can feel it. Right. I\'m like that. Yeah, it\'s the it\'s not even like the fine grain. It\'s, it\'s the stuff that will cut you if you don\'t handle it properly. Kind of sandpaper. Right?

Donna Tashjian 23:29
Right. Right.

Brandon Handley 23:33
And the idea of compassion and forgiveness and forgiveness so that you can, you know, set yourself free. I think that there\'s a misconception of what freedom is. And I think in this context, when you\'re setting people free, what would you say you\'re helping them to do? What are you setting them free of?

Donna Tashjian 23:58
Well, when you say freedom, what are you thinking?

Brandon Handley 24:02
I think these days, I\'m thinking freedom from? In my own mind, right, like, letting my own internal bondages go and just, you know, recognizing something as self limiting, recognizing that I\'m the person who wrapped the gift and sandpaper. Right? And so when I think that other people may think of freedom as like, Will I want to go out and do the things I want to do I want to be able to, you know, buy beer at 18 instead of 21 This isn\'t right I don\'t feel free I want to be liberated. And that\'s that\'s one type of freedom but I think that the the true freedom that you\'re teaching, at least my perspective would be is teaching people how to free their minds and their hearts.

Donna Tashjian 24:57
Yeah, What that\'s what forgiveness does. One of the people that we often need to forgive is ourself. When we\'ve gone through things, somehow we blame ourselves, we\'re very hard on ourselves. And when when we begin to forgive ourselves, it causes our eyes, if you will, to lift off of our feet, if you can look at that kind of picture person that\'s down, and they\'re looking at their feet, and you lift your eyes up, and you begin to know that this is not, this is a chapter in my book, not the whole book. And not to let it be that whole book. But freedom really is eternal in internal, not external. And if you I can\'t remember the man, he was a writer from he was in the Nazi concentration camps. And he talked about the freedom that Victor for Yes, yes, that quote that I\'m going to misquote but you get the idea that, you know, the freedom is actually internal. And you can be free and, and he, in his estimation, inside the Nazi prison, he was, they couldn\'t take that away from him. But if he had held unforgiveness, he would have had that weight, and he would not have been as free. Forgiveness is a huge subject. And it means a lot of different things for a lot of different people. And I spend a lot of time helping people understand what that really is, and how that really works. But the biggest point I want to make is, is that you begin to look for something good in the midst of things, it lifts your eyes up, it changes the way your outcome is, because I\'m no longer for me, I describe it as my pity party, where I\'m feeling sorry for myself. And that doesn\'t get us anywhere. Winston Churchill, Churchill had a quote, for God\'s sake, if you\'re going through hell, for God\'s sake, keep going. And a lot of times we camp out in our disappointment, we build a tent, we build a house, and we\'re just going to stay here because this wasn\'t right. But it wasn\'t meant to be that way. Journey Through it, not stay in it.

Brandon Handley 27:15
Yeah, that\'s fantastic. The right if you\'re, if you\'re in helps keep on going. Who wants to a lot, but you know, a lot of people, I think they feel like they\'ve got to fight that fight. They\'ve got to stay there. There\'s something for them to write by. And they feel vindicated by by saying they\'re in that space. And it\'s almost like a badge of honor. I\'m in hell, nobody cares. I\'m in hell. Right? Well keep your exits coming up. And keep them going. What is uh, you know, what\'s top of mind for you right now is like, kind of COVID going through what\'s your clients? You know, how\'s your client? Tell Ben through COVID? What are you seeing is helping people to get through this period right now.

Donna Tashjian 28:01
Um, the main thing that COVID has done as far as what I\'m involved in is it made people seek help that might not have before. But I personally is for in and there\'s been a lot of loss, not just necessarily life, but life changes that have occurred. And grief is a is definitely something that shows up to help people look through and work through. So that\'s probably the main areas of loss Ignis, it doesn\'t necessarily mean people have lost jobs, and people have lost what they consider freedom, and all kinds of situations for them to be able to move how learn how to move through that. And the other thing that has stuck for some of the people I\'ve talked to is, they can get set if I\'m not a fan of the news, because there\'s no good news. But if you watch that kind of thing, you can get stuck in hopelessness and fear. And so helping people to rise above that.

Brandon Handley 29:11
Yeah, that\'s a big one. Do you advise that they turn the news off?

Donna Tashjian 29:17
If it\'s causing them severe anxiety? Yes, absolutely.

Brandon Handley 29:22
What\'s the typical reaction to something like that?

Donna Tashjian 29:25
Most the time, they agree with me. If there\'s other ways of finding out what\'s going on, then sitting hours watching the news. Yeah, you don\'t need to do that to find out what you need to know to stay current. Sure. And so there\'s other means to do that.

Brandon Handley 29:42
What do you recommend to to stay current for people that aren\'t going to watch the news?

Donna Tashjian 29:48
There\'s different online outlets where you can read the captions to be able to do that. And if there\'s anything big going on there, friends, let them know

Brandon Handley 30:00
I was curious. I mean, I think I heard maybe first through Tim Ferriss and not necessarily, you know, Tim Ferriss, you know, but the whole idea that once you turn the news off, now you\'ve got like this great conversation, because your friends will come out and be like, did you hear about blah, blah, blah, blah, blah? Like, I didn\'t tell me all about it. That\'s, now you\'ve got now you\'ve got a conversation, but

Donna Tashjian 30:23
he will tell you, that is for sure. If there\'s something that you really need to know, somebody will tell you.

Brandon Handley 30:31
For sure. What is I mean, is there something that what is something that maybe we haven\'t touched on so far that you\'d want to share with our audience today?

Donna Tashjian 30:44
I don\'t know, if there\'s anything else I\'ve hit the most important parts is having them real look for the gift in situations to keep their eyes up to get support and help we\'re not meant to do this alone. And for me, I would encourage you to strengthen your faith, you know, strengthen that part of your life to be able to get through it. So those are some things for sure.

Brandon Handley 31:15
I mean, I agree with that 100%, you know, find find that something bigger, greater in your life that we know exists, give it a name, whatever you feel like you need to and lean into that there\'s something there\'s something really in there was talking about the let go and let God thing earlier for me. You know, I devised a way where it made sense for me in my mind, and like, the weight fell right off, it was amazing. I was like, like, oh, wait, this, this makes sense. And so I think that that\'s super powerful to share. One of the things that I guess I\'d love to touch on though, too, is is sharing kind of the benefits of connecting with spirituality and source and your greater self. What does that look like in action? Right? I mean, because I\'m sure you\'ve run into the occasional person who just doesn\'t see it yet, and can\'t feel it yet that just says, Well, that sounds great and ideal, but what\'s that? How\'s that going to help me? You know, with my day job?

Donna Tashjian 32:19
So your question is, is how do we connect with God?

Brandon Handley 32:22
The question is, you know, we\'re talking this ideal life that\'s available, right? This this, we\'re talking, stuffing into your greatness. We\'re talking, you know, accepting, accepting that we are great, and we\'ve got these gifts to share. Okay. How do you help the person that just isn\'t seeing that yet, right? The the person\'s like, oh, yeah, but you still got to, you know, pay the bills, you still got to do the whatever, you still got to do some other working, you know, you don\'t just become great, just because you said so Donna.

Donna Tashjian 32:56
I love that question. Um, I\'m glad I asked what exactly you meant. Um, the, the key to it all is remember what we said freedom was, its internal. And so when I, when I have someone who feels hopeless, which is kind of what you were describing, I\'m stuck in this dead end job. I don\'t feel great. I don\'t feel like I\'m accomplishing anything. I don\'t know that I really even matter, perhaps. And helping them work on their internal beliefs and mindset would be the first step. Because you can\'t see. It\'s like, the world looks flat, I can\'t see what I can\'t see. And from where my perspective is, it\'s flat. That\'s what the world is. And so that just because that\'s all you can see, doesn\'t mean that\'s all there is. It\'s just what you can see right now. So what I help people do is to see more to be able to see the round of the Earth, so that they can see that there is more than your dead end job as you put it, or whatever limiting things that you feel like you\'re in your life, there\'s more to see. And I would help you see that that\'s what a coach does is help you see what you can\'t see yet.

Brandon Handley 34:14
Thanks. Now, like I said, it\'s one of those I know that I\'ve run up against it. And people, you know, the it\'s a challenge, right to just try and help them to understand, was it gonna help them do? Right? What, what exactly is it you\'re gonna help them do? So thank you for clarifying that for me. So, we\'re in a little spot of the podcast where I like to kind of think about what this is, is spiritual speed dating, right? Like there\'s somebody out there who\'s looking for their next spiritual hookup, as it were. And I have a question or two, I\'m gonna go ahead and ask you along that line down. So okay. Spiritual Bachelorette number one. Why are so many people depressed?

Donna Tashjian 34:59
Me Because what they\'re focusing on?

Brandon Handley 35:03
What do you mean by that? Yeah. What do you mean by that?

Donna Tashjian 35:07
Whatever you focus on you magnify whatever you focus on, you multiply. If I\'m focusing on the lack that\'s in my life, anyone could be 15 minutes away from depression, if you start focusing on what\'s wrong in your life, your life is always filled with good and bad. Let\'s look at our neighborhood, there\'s good parts of our city. And there\'s parts it\'s not, there\'s great things about those jobs. And there\'s things that you don\'t like, in the house, you live you like this, but you don\'t like that. There\'s always a mixture of good things that we enjoy or we prefer, and things that we would prefer not. It\'s wherever you put your focus, that\'s what you\'re going to magnify and multiply in your life. So if you are, and the other thing is your focus also creates emotions, we think emotions just happen. But they happen by what I\'m focusing on. So if I\'m focusing on the negative and the lack of my life, I\'m going to have negative emotions. If I choose to focus on what the blessings are in my life, finding things to be thankful for, and grateful for, that\'s the quickest way to pull you out of a depression or anxiety.

Brandon Handley 36:18
Thought it sounds like you\'re saying I might feel to control my emotions,

Donna Tashjian 36:22
just a bit. And I talked to women. So you know, I\'ve got there\'s even more emotions we do is we do have more emotions. Yes. And I will, I will say it. And so teaching women, how not to be ruled by are my emotions, I can actually control them and rule them as well. Now, there are some chemical things going on in women\'s body that are different. I\'m not going there. I\'m just generalizing that where I put my focus, my feelings will follow that

Brandon Handley 36:53
I think that\'s a great point. A lot of times we feel like, our emotions come before our thoughts, right, and what we\'re focusing on, but what you\'re saying again, here is that what you focus on what you\'re thinking about is what can help to drive those emotions.

Donna Tashjian 37:08
Yes, absolutely.

Brandon Handley 37:10
So let\'s try what are we also afraid of?

Donna Tashjian 37:22
I think the most thing that if we really got down to are afraid of not belonging and being loved is probably one of the main things and the other things is I don\'t I want to matter, I want to somehow matter. And so I think that\'s probably the main thing. We want to be belong and be loved and matter.

Brandon Handley 37:44
Yeah, that\'s I mean, that\'s, that\'s a big one. We want to feel like we\'re significant in some way, right? We\'re seeing for our contributions and the kind of like the truth of who we are, we want our greatness shining through. And sometimes we don\'t, may not feel like that it is and that can cause us to kind of definitely be upset and afraid to make the next step. Nobody\'s seen the the greatness is I\'m contributing, nobody\'s seeing, you know, you know, the truth of who I am. And that can that can definitely make you afraid to step forward. So thought, who would you say is your ideal client? Right now?

Donna Tashjian 38:25
My ideal client and I, I coach women. So that\'s first criteria. And the ideal client is someone who has had a painful past and disappointments. And they\'re feeling like they\'re stuck there. They just kind of keep showing up and they want them they want to move forward and create a life they\'ve always dreamed that would be I wanted to make a comment about greatness since I\'ve said that a lot of thought came to me with the last couple of comments you said, is a lot of times we think greatness is grandiose. And the most important thing that I want to get this across is greatness is just being you. That is great. And I wrote a blog, I\'m probably not the first one to say it, but small hinges move big doors. Sometimes the small, we could change the world if everyone was kind, just being kind, it could transform our whole world. So it doesn\'t mean great doesn\'t mean grandiose necessarily, but just be you authentically, you can be kind it changes everything.

Brandon Handley 39:42
That\'s a great it\'s a great point. I remember years ago when I first felt like I was quote, unquote, stepping into my greatness, just feeling all of who I am. Right. And that was it. It wasn\'t anything bigger or greater to just me Feeling true to myself? And I was at Dad convention dad 2.0 which is like a bunch of dad bloggers go to that. And I was asking him I said, Well, you know what\'s, what do you think is keeping you from your own greatness? What\'s keeping you from stepping you in into your greatness and people I think took it the same way that you\'re saying it right there. They will pool my to be great. Well, you\'re here to be great. is kind of how I would see that. So Thanks for Thanks for that clarification. Where should we send people to get a little more Donna Tashjian ties?

Donna Tashjian 40:37
You did it. My website, my website will be the best place I\'m also on social media so you can check you know, check me out on social media, but my website is I vibrant. living.com.

Brandon Handley 40:51
Don, I want to say thanks for taking the time to stop on a podcast today. Really appreciate what it is that you\'re bringing out to the world helping us women to kind of get on stuck and really

Unknown Speaker 41:03
hope you enjoyed this episode of the spiritual dove pocket. Stay connected with us directly through spiritual dove.co. You can also join the discussion on Facebook spiritual though, and Instagram at spiritual underscore Joe. If you would like to speak with us, send us an email Brandon at spiritual dope CO and as always, thank you for cultivating your mindset and creating a better reality. This includes the most thought provoking part of your day. Don\'t forget to like and subscribe to stay fully up to date. Until next time, be kind to yourself and trust your intuition.

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