BROADCASTS.com

b'

Joining me today is Alyssa Chambers, a mother of 2 and owner of Bonnie\\u2019s Joy Pinup. She has quite the journey to share, and is here to speak loud about putting in the work of \\u2018de-programming\\u2019 abuse, both in victim and abuser. She\\u2019s currently working with a trauma coach, which is what she describes as the difference between her and her abusers: that she is actively working on becoming a better person.

Alyssa grew up in an environment that had rampant forms of abuse. Her parents taught her by example to deal with things in an unhealthy way, oftentimes with alcohol or drugs. She describes her parents as ill-equipped and not present in her childhood. The circumstances she grew up in left her and her siblings at risk for predators, trauma, and abuse.\\xa0

There was no one instance of trauma or traumatic event in her life. What she needed to truly heal was a sense of stability. Alyssa values where she came from, but wouldn\\u2019t wish it on anyone else. No child deserves to grow up in such harsh circumstances, but she recognizes that every part of her journey has made her the person that she is now.\\xa0

Alyssa says that it\\u2019s ultimately up to her daughter to stop the cycle of abuse in her lifetime. Just like with any of her partners, she can\\u2019t force her daughter to heal. It\\u2019s something you have to choose for yourself, Alyssa claims. Even though she has supported her daughter through copious traumas, she recognizes the autonomy in deciding to choose a better narrative for yourself.\\xa0

Alyssa struggles to choose better for herself, too, but is actively working to improve. Her programming tells her deep down that she deserves less than a healthy relationship, and while she may know otherwise logically, her programming urges her back into that cycle.\\xa0

While it can be frustrating and upsetting to unlearn these tendencies, Alyssa knows that the longer you work on yourself, the happier you\\u2019re going to be. Ultimately, she\\u2019s thankful for the things that she\\u2019s gone through, because it\\u2019s allowed her to become a better, kinder person. She can have more empathy for people who have gone through horrifying things because she has also gone through them. She can relate to and empathize even with her abusers, showing endless compassion for people. As she says, there is no magic pill, and it takes a lot of work, but in the end it is always worth it to follow your instinct and change your life.\\xa0

Listen in to hear Alyssa\\u2019s experiences with abusive relationships, her journey with sobriety, and the other ways in which she\\u2019s unlearning abusive programming.\\xa0

Resources Mentioned

Join Me on Speak Loud Platform

Speak Loud Podcast on the web

Find Alyssa\\u2019s business on Instagram

Spread the message of Speak Loudly Podcast and share this episode with a friend!

***Disclaimer: All content found on Speak Loud Podcast, including text, images, audio, or other formats were created for informational purposes only. Material contained on Speak Loud Podcast website, podcast, and social media postings are not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard or delay seeking professional medical advice. Information on this podcast and guest comments, opinions, and content are solely for educational and entertainment purposes. Use of this information is at your own risk.**