10: Keeping Commitments to Yourself
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Our caller today is Sha who is a millennial. Millennials are today\\u2019s 20 and early 30 somethings. Many millennials are unjustly thought to be narcissistic, entitled and said to have no work ethic.
Sha is experiencing residue from having many of her decisions made for her during her adolescence. And it\\u2019s not just Sha who is confronting these issues; many millennials feel the effects of over-parenting and the accompanying pressures that linger from missing out on important developmental stages.
Sha and I uncover her validation issues and examine her inability to stick to a routine. She becomes aware of her past programming and I offer her tools to assist her in reprogramming herself. One important tool is to understand that what she wants to hear from others is what she actually wants to hear from herself.
We also explore ways to relieve anxiety and self-trust issues through being in the present.
After the coaching session, I offer a special guided meditation; so go to a quiet place where you can close your eyes and get serene with me.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
Do you have trouble making decisions?
Do you consult multiple people before you make a choice?
Is it hard for you to stick with a routine or stay disciplined?
Do you have a hard time quieting your mind?
Sha\\u2019s Question:
Sha finds it hard to make decisions and is having trouble relaxing.
Sha\\u2019s Key Insights and Aha\\u2019s:
\\u25cf She was peacocking all the time
\\u25cf She wasn\\u2019t seeing herself
\\u25cf She may have missed out on fundamental developmental stages
\\u25cf She has difficulty with discipline and routines
\\u25cf She doesn\\u2019t trust herself
How to get over it and on with it:
\\u25cf Practice telling yourself \\u201cbe here now\\u201d
\\u25cf Repair yourself by giving yourself the developmental stages you didn\\u2019t have
\\u25cf Take actions to support autonomy and decision making
\\u25cf Add some routines to your life
\\u25cf Start making decisions
Tools and Takeaways:
\\u25cf Validation seekers should write a list of everything they want to hear from others and say these things to themselves
\\u25cf Make a solo decision making challenge
\\u25cf Write out a routine for yourself. Have one commitment every morning and one commitment every evening
\\u25cf Start a meditation practice
Resources:
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