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Hello, welcome to - NO DON'T TOUCH THAT - to One Life Left, Europe's only - THAT'S MY EMAIL ACCOUNT STOP READING IT - videogame radio sho - LEAVE ANN ALONE -- radio show broadcasting on -- SIMON JUST... Oh. The End.

That's right. Goaded by a google (is that our collective noun? Email in please) of One Life Left listeners addressing things to the team 'and Simon', OLL's firey co-presenter is off the rails in OLL #58. And as much as it SOUNDS like the team are generally fractious and flirtatious here the issue came to the fore in the five minutes before the show started. See, Ste asked Simon to watch his levels. As in the levels on the desk which measure how loudly he's going off the rails.

Which means Simon spends the whole show shouting and interrupting and watching his levels, Ste spends the whole show stumbling through half-finished anecdotes all the time feeling he's picking his way down rainbow road and only delaying the moment he plumments, and Ann bats her eyelids a little, smiles so sweetly and considers the ways she could murder a man.

Still, Levelator's hopefully flattened the thing out a bit which means if you can pick your way through the mumbling and amateurish form you'll find Craig 'The Rage''s best poem ever, Taliah, Derek, plenty of letters, the four entries to OLL's PixelH8 competition and much, much more.

Most important thing to remember this week: it's the One Life Left Christmas Party on Saturday so do try and make it -- details on the Facebook but essentially The Blue Posts on Rupert St, Soho, London from 1pm to until we pass out.

That's it. See you in a week for the very last OLL of 2007 (festively broadcastable events not withstanding).

Join our Facebook Group for reasons discussed in this episode by clicking here, or identify yourself as a fan to others on that same slightly-too-ubiquitous-for-comfort-now site by clicking here. Our MySpace is here (poor old MySpace: once it seemed like the world would be theirs, but now it is the new Friendster, which makes Friendster the new actually-meeting-people, which is just so over). The OLL forum is here and if you want to email us you can do so at this address.