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She calls, ‘why did you leave!’ She screams. She hangs up. I call back. She picks up. I whisper, ‘hey. ‘ Only sniffles on the other end, ‘hey,’ I say again. ‘It’s me. Its only me.’ She hangs up again. I call. She doesn’t answer. I call again. Nothing. She calls, I miss it, I’m swimming. I call; silently she reaches for the little green circle, presses the red one by accident. ‘Shit!’ she yells at herself in an empty room. She wants to reach. She stares and waits instead. She stares at the ceiling of a foreign room. She looks for chubby stars, finds none. She looks at her phone. Nothing. ‘Fuck!’ She yells again. It bounces off an uncomfortable emptiness. She tries to leave. Nope, can’t move a muscle. She tries to eat. Nope, can’t swallow. Can’t chew. Can’t speak. She sticks her fingers in her mouth to make sure she’s still got her tongue. Yup, slippery little bugger is still ticking on the back of her teeth. ING still gets stuck in the back of her throat, same accent different way of speaking. She’s looking for a different language. She’s looking for a definition for a feeling, but nothing exists. ‘How can this be!’ she keeps screaming. ‘My vocabulary is enormous! I was born knowing everything! How can a word be missing from my speech? I had every right to make up every one as I went along. Why did I let them be made for me! What fucking language do I speak again?’ She looks at the palm of her hand, she accidently called me home in the midst of her ranting.

I giggle on the other end, ‘my you’re pissy Kitty Kat. Plain English baby, no rhymes, no rhythms that you feel you can’t keep up with. No tricky shit. Even with the clumsiest pair of two left feet I’ve ever seen, I’ll let you take the lead. Super duper plain and simple sweetie pants, all you need to do is see me. Really see me. Me! Me me me me me. It’s only you and exactly what you want me to be, standing butt naked before you. A golden statue of flesh and a boney baby body, belonging to your touch only, then, all you have to do is touch me. Simple. There are no words to explain my body to you. You must remember without a single one. You must reach back far enough, when the only word you knew was grabbing what you wanted and sticking your tongue out at the rest. The rest is second best. The rest don’t even deserve a peek at your sweet devious tongue. They should consider themselves Godly for having been graced with your presence, and fuck off!’

She’s still shocked she called. She can’t believe I heard what she thought she never said. ‘How do you know my secrets?’ she whispers. 

‘I was born by your side buttercup; remember? When you jumped into my guts, it felt like curiosity. But in truth, it was an undeniable familiarity. Plain and simple.’

She starts crying. She can’t help it. She can’t stop feeling. She’s loosing words. She’s finding faith. She’s remembering. ‘Daisy.’

‘Yes baby.’ 

‘My name.’

‘Yes my love.’ 

‘How long have you been waiting Charlie?’

‘Lifetimes little lady, when you died, I waited for you to remember life. Generation after generation after sweet generation of running to and from your side, never forgetting to remember home, it has always been you.’

Her face gets flushed. She’s hot all over. She’s weeping. She’s slapping my face, my chest, my cheek; my breast. ‘I only need myself! I don’t need your precious patience pony boy! I can’t stand waiting so long! I can’t stand the stillness of purposelessly sitting with time and thanking life for every breath, nothing else. I have work to do! I am not guilty Sage! Stop looking at me that way!’

‘Baby.’

‘What!’

‘I’m in your ear. I’m by your side, but I’m not near, remember? We’re on the phone goofball. It is only my voice that I will ever be able to give you in this state of things. I’m not looking at you. Not yet anyway. I’m staring at the apartment complex across the street. Sixteen different sets of humans staring back at me, 48 windows in total on this side. I’m wondering why three windows up on the far right never turns his lights off. You think he’s afraid of the dark?’

‘With the way they make us play in this shit show? Yes. Of course he’s scared. His windows don’t face the sun like you. He doesn’t stare into her the way that you do. He doesn’t have my love. You do.’

A giant smile breaks over my entire body and both my baby dimples burst into full expression. Every nerve feels they’ve gone up in flames in the most magnificent way. My thighs are shaking, my stomach is flipping; everything is inside out. I go blind. I see everything. I flip upside down and the whole world changes, just for me. I speak and everything I see becomes what she needs it to be, perfectly prepared for my feet to walk towards her, for my hands to reach. We were handmade to move for love. So fucking simple, its all we ever had to do. It is done for us. It has already happened my love. Take my hand. Lets get the fuck out of here! Lets stay! I scream and throw the phone across the room by accident. It shatters in a million pieces. ‘Fuck!’ I giggle. I leave everything behind all over again, run all the way up Dove Street, and scream her name at the top of my lungs. I know exactly whom I belong to. I do not sleep alone. This sweet precious City cradles me every night. I am home.