Kwibuka 25

Published: April 6, 2019, 11:12 p.m.

April 7 th ... It is a day that unavoidably always comes with a lot of grief. The pain, the guilt, the sorrow and the ifs ... Before the advent of social media, I used to hide from this day, I would come out after a few days of crying..I would show up strong for ceremony of kwibuka and go back to my grief. The guilt of me having survived has nonetheless never made me forfeit my duties. No, rather the contrary: this is the time to keep my head up, to set higher goals . It is a reminder that I survived, which is however always followed by this incessant question ‘But Why’? Now that the world has taken to social media, there is no more hiding. The testimonies and messages of comfort - which always bring discomfort as well - will reach us wherever we are. There is no escaping from them, just as there is also no planning for when to cry. You will receive these well meant messages whether you are at home, at work, at school or on the road. As for the 25th, I choose to stop running and hiding. I’ll be embracing the pain, the sadness and mostly the “share button”. There will be no more hiding though. Instead, let us share how we feel, how we survived and how we deal with it by living with it. So If you see us cry, do not stop us and do not tell us to be strong. A listening ear, a shoulder to cry on or a tissue would be much more helpful.