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b'How do we discipline our kids when they start sassing us with phrases they picked up elsewhere? We can view it as a teachable moment and foundation for cognitive development down the road.\\nA listener in our Facebook group says:\\n"My daughter is 3, almost 4. She\\u2019s been at daycare for about a year now and I\\u2019ve noticed she\\u2019s started picking up phrases from school that bother me. The thing is, some of them are probably also good things for her to be able to say, like \\u201cDon\\u2019t touch me\\u201d and \\u201cI don\\u2019t like you right now\\u201d and \\u201cGo away." \\nThe last one in particular really bugs me because while trying to gentle parent and be present, she only says these things when she\\u2019s mad at me for saying no to something. It somehow feels wrong because we don\\u2019t say that kind of stuff with each other in the home. \\nThere\\u2019s a part of me that\\u2019s glad she has the bodily autonomy to say no and I want to encourage that for her life in general. But when it\\u2019s just her and me alone I\\u2019m not sure what to do. Is this normal or should I be worried about what she\\u2019s picking up at school?"\\nIs it necessarily a BIG deal that your child is sassing you at home? Not necessarily. Is it a teachable moment? Absolutely. Parenting gently doesn\'t necessarily mean never correcting a child when they\'re doing something unkind or hurtful.\\nYour child is allowed to express when she\'d prefer to play alone, for sure. "I don\'t like you right now" is certainly not an abnormal way for a preschooler to express that sentiment, but there are probably ways for her to express that preference without hurting the other person\'s feelings, whether it\'s a parent or a classmate.\\nYou can offer her more polite phrases like "I would really like to be alone right now, please" or "I need a break," so she can express those same feelings she\'s having but in a more respectful way.\\n3 going on 4 is when children start to learn theory of mind, meaning they can conceive of the thoughts, feelings, and desires of others as different from their own. So within the next year or so, with your help, she\'s going to be able to sort out how to let a friend down easy and how to stop a bully in her tracks. It\'s a process, and it\'s proper for you as her parent to be an active part of that learning.\\nLinks! \\nKendra Cherry for VeryWell Mind: How the Theory of Mind Helps Us Understand Others\\n\\n\\nSpecial thanks to our sponsor, Pampers: \\nFor trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning free diapers.\\nLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices'