Episode 67: Tim unveils his new conversational tactics: Contribution Sharing and Mansplaining. Then, Jeff takes it upon himself to educate an educated dinner party on their own professions.
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The rocket scientist who was seated across the table from Jeff leaned forward. “Are you a food critic?” she asked. “Is that why you introduced the meal as well.”
Jeff waved his hand. “Oh no,” he said. “Not a food critic. Actually, I suppose you could call me that. Yes, I do have an intimate relationship with food. I am very knowledgable about food. I have been eating it for almost my entire life.”
“Almost?” the heart surgeon said.
“Well yes,” Jeff said. “I started eating food right after I was weaned off my mother’s breast milk. I think you would agree that that is quite a long time to have been eating food. So yes, I have quite a lot of experience with food. So yes, you can call me a food critic. I am a food critic.”
The heart surgeon couldn’t take it anymore. This Jeff fellow, yeah, more like this Jeff ASSHOLE just sat there nibbling nibbling away on the food he put on his plate. Even though the heart surgeon had asked him questions, even though the heart surgeon had asked Jeff several questions, Jeff wasn’t turning to the heart surgeon and asking what the heart surgeon did! How could the heart surgeon brag about being a heart surgeon if no one asked him what he did? He could just say it! Unprompted! “I’m a heart surgeon!” the heart surgeon blurted out. “I do surgery on hearts.”
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If you enjoy westerns like True Grit or The Ballad of Buster Scruggs, check out Tim’s western novel, Dust, available on Amazon in eBook form in addition to being read on the podcast.
For more, visit timdrugan.com.