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b'BUILD YOUR CASTLE. Love at first sight is bullshit. A relationship is like a castle. You find a plot of land that has a lot of potential. Then, bit by bit, you build the castle. But it takes work from both of you. One person can\\u2019t be laying the bricks while the other is home watching TV. After lots of hard work, you\\u2019ll have something unique and ornate that belongs to you. You\\u2019ll have a castle. That\\u2019s love. On today\\u2019s episode of The School of Greatness, I talk about the key to lasting relationships with an international guru of the dating and relationship-coaching scene: Matthew Hussey. Matthew Hussey is a speaker, New York Times Bestselling author, columnist for Cosmopolitan Magazine, and dating expert on ABC\\u2019s digital series What To Text Him Back. His corporate clients include Hugo Boss, The Perfume Shop, Virgin Gyms, Procter & Gamble, Bare Escentuals, U.S. legal giant Weil Gotshal & Manges, and global management consultants Accenture. 50,000 women have attended his live events and he has reached over 10 million online. Matthew says that the \\u201cactivation energy\\u201d for starting relationships is lower than ever. This causes ghosting. People are less invested in relationships. But there are ways you can meet people indirectly.\\nSo get ready to learn the three things you need to build a great relationship on Episode 811.\\nSome Questions I Ask:\\nDo people even want to have a committed, long term relationship? (19:00)\\nIs a great relationship when you stop thinking about your needs and not expecting anything in return? (21:30)\\nHow do we step outside of the emotional feelings in a relationship? (25:00)\\nWhen do you know you\\u2019re ready for a committed, intimate relationship? (47:00)\\nWhat are the three things you need to have to sustain a relationship? (52:00)\\nIn This Episode You Will Learn:\\nAbout \\u201cactivation energy\\u201d and why things like Tinder make it low (10:00)\\nWhy space is important in order to not react emotionally (30:00)\\nAbout the \\u201ccastle\\u201d metaphor and why you need to build together (38:00)\\nWhy the \\u201ctrash cans\\u201d define your relationship more than the highlights (45:00)\\nThe four stages of all relationships (1:02:30)\\nThe first step you can do to get out of the weeds of singlehood (1:11:30)\\nIf you enjoyed this episode, check out the video, show notes, and more at www.lewishowes.com/811 and follow at instagram.com/lewishowes'