Episode 71: Negative Intimacy and Forgiveness
b'This week I\\u2019m bringing you a solo episode, and I\\u2019m talking all about negative intimacy and forgiveness. First, let\\u2019s talk about negative intimacy. In a nutshell, negative intimacy is the continuation of unhealthy dynamics of your marriage long into your divorce \\u2014 something I engaged in for about five years post-divorce!\\nIn this episode, I offer some questions to ask if you think you\\u2019re in a negatively intimate relationship with your ex or soon-to-be-ex, such as: \\u201cWhat is the connection you are trying to keep alive?\\u201dUnderstanding why you\\u2019re seeking this connection and then moving on from it is all part of the letting go process. Letting go happens over time, and often in waves. And it is a process. Extricating yourself from past relationship patterns is where the real divorce happens.\\xa0\\nI also sound off on the difference between forgiveness and resentment. And, know this, you don\\u2019t have to forgive someone. However, you should work through and process your resentments. Listen in, reach out if you need guidance, and stay well!\\xa0\\nShow Highlights\\n\\nHow to hold your boundaries and you shift the relationship dynamic.\\n\\nWhy negative intimacy typically revolves around your children.\\n\\nYou don\\u2019t HAVE to forgive someone.\\xa0\\n\\nWhy you should process through your resentments.\\xa0\\n\\nA Mother\\u2019s Day message reminder - ask for what you need.\\n\\nResources & Links:\\nMe in the New York Times! Podcasts Inspired by Love and Relationships\\n The Ultimate Divorce Survival GuideShould I Stay or Should I Go Facebook Group\\n\\xa0\\nLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices'