So why on earth do we so often signal the opposite? Literally and figuratively, we send the message that they\u2019re bothering us, that they\u2019re a distraction, a burden, annoying. As Evelyn McDonnell writes in her fascinating book The World According to Joan Didion, Didion\u2019s daughter Quintana Roo once wrote down a list of her mother\u2019s sayings. They were: \u201cBrush your teeth,\u201d \u201cBrush your hair,\u201d and \u201cShush, I'm working.\u201dOnly later do we realize what we\u2019re saying to them\u2014as Didion did tragically in he...