64. How to Praise People
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\nThanks for listening
\nPraise is one of the most powerful things a leader can offer their team.
\nWhen delivered well (and well-deserved), praise gives people the drive and motivation to continue doing the caliber of work you want to see.
\nAs you grow in manliness, you will increasingly become the kind of person whose opinion is valued by others. And your good opinion will be valued in direct proportion to how much your listener respects you, and believes you. (Never try to fake sincerity \u2014 the worst thing that might happen is, you succeed and get good at it, undermining your integrity, the foundation of true manliness.)
\nAs I teach people how to give effective praise, this aspect of sincerity can be a real stumbling block. If it is, respect it. Become more mindful. When you are mindful enough to notice that you are struggling with sincerity, you are also mindful enough to start to develop some true sincerity. Contemplate the person whom you would like to praise. Open yourself up to noticing what it is they are doing right. Open yourself up to feeling a true sense of appreciation for what they\u2019re doing. Once you\u2019re in touch with that true sense of appreciation, you can voice it with sincerity.
\nAnd when you praise, you are making a statement about right and wrong. You can only give sincere praise for good work if you know what good work is. You can only praise someone for taking the right path, when you know which path is right. A real man knows right from wrong, and is not afraid to champion the right. Effective praise is a gentle and effective way to champion the right.
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