EP 374: Her Story: Part 1 of a three-part Couples Coaching Series with Claire
This episode is the first of a three-part couples coaching series. Christine coaches Claire and Jimmy separately, and then together in Part 3. In today\u2019s call, Claire reveals she would like Jimmy to make plans with her and make her a priority in his life. Christine uncovers some childhood patterns that may be at play in Claire\u2019s current relationship.
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[For show notes, go here: Christinehassler.com/episode374]
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When there is something that is bothering us and we are unable to shift it, we need to dig deeper. It is normal for us to be able to identify what is going on with someone else yet still to be blind to our own blocks. When we finally see it we realize how obvious it was but it is hard to see. We often just want to notice the current problem and fix our relationship, versus going back to see what it reminds us of in our past.
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Things in our lives will continue to be frustrating until we unpack the message they are illuminating.
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When we take the time to work on ourselves first, often it offers more clarity about issues in our relationships. We can\u2019t work on issues in our relationships without working on ourselves.
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Consider/Ask Yourself:
- Is there a constant pattern in your relationship you can\u2019t seem to shift?
- Do you and your partner argue about the same issues over and over?
- Do you have an unmet need from a parent that is showing up in your relationship?
- Are you willing to see your partner in a different light? Are you willing to see your partner for who they are, right here, right now?
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Claire\u2019s Question:
Claire would like guidance about how she can feel like a priority in her partner\u2019s life.
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Claire\u2019s Key Insights and Ahas:
- Her childhood wound is abandonment.
- She doesn\u2019t feel like a priority in Jimmy\u2019s life.
- When she feels seen by Jimmy she feels empowered in the relationship.
- She has different patterns than Jimmy.
- She has been married before.
- Her father wasn\u2019t present every day in her childhood.
- She is attached to planning and doing things.
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How to Get Over It and On With It:
- Practice connection and intimacy with Jimmy in everyday life.
- Remind her inner child that Jimmy isn\u2019t her Dad and she can get love whenever she wants.
- Let go of planning for a while to accept love in the here and now.
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Resources:
Christine Hassler \u2014 Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
@SacredUnionCouples on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com \u2014 Males who want to be on the show
Jill@ChristineHassler.com \u2014 For information on any of my services
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