Adopting a Rhinoceros
South Africa’s largest Rhinoceros farm has gone bankrupt. And so… they’re looking for anyone who wants to adopt and love 2-thousand of these giant behemoths. Talk to your family about snapping up a few ,,, and helping preserve the species. Ask your kids.
Should we buy our family a Rhino
They’re so so big… I know I know
But cute and wrinkly as animals get
A rhino might just be a pet
The giant horn won’t attack you
She’d probably just try to smack you.
Because the giant horn is ornamental
Their favorite weapon is actually dental
Upset a Rhino and she’ll then unsheath
A giant row of shiny teeth.
It sounds a little bit too corny
But the horn just shows a rhino’s horny
And by the way, it’s not a bone
That sharpened curved and giant cone
Is tangled nose hair … think its not?
It’s mixed with hard and dried-up snot
You thought that it was so majestic
But its origins are most pathetic
An 8-foot nose horn that’s conceived
By what blows out when you might sneeze?
Would you want a rhino as a pet
Please do not decide just yet
I’ve read up & investigated
They cannot be domesticated.
But they can recognize a human.
It won’t say “hello nueman”
It will have some idea you’re there
But its eyes are split by that horn right there.
And while on we’re on the vision topic A rhino's eyes are both myopic
They need.. from the day they're born
Glasses perched upon that horn.
But if you had one as a pet
You’d be popular I’d bet
From north the west the south and east
Folks would come to see your beast
But what in heck would you
do with 50 daily pounds of poo?
That’s left behind in little mounds
by a beast that weighs 5000 pounds.
And this is why you might consider
A dog named Rex or a horse named Trigger A rhino? You’d eventually despise her unless you need some fertilizer