Vanquishing The Self Improvement Blues
We’re still in the thick of hard times of 2020 with both the pandemic and racial tensions here in the US and all over the world. Many of us are also in the midst of doing some deep change work. And change work is difficult even under normal circumstances. Throw a pandemic, protests, social injustices, and other tensions into the mix, and — well, it can feel like too much.
When we received shelter in place orders, some of my one-on-one breakthrough clients wanted to take a break from their active change work. Their desire for change was still there; it just wasn’t the right time. There was too much going on to be able to focus.
After taking a breather, most of them have returned — more ready than ever to get back to it.
They realized that it takes constant effort even to hold onto the progress they made.
Then there’s momentum to consider. Humans are designed for growth and change. The question is, where is your momentum? Change is going to happen. The question is, will it happen on your terms?
There is, no doubt, a time to focus on being rather than actively doing. Sometimes we need to make ourselves comfortable. This episode is about listening to yourself and understanding what you need in the moment and what will serve you over the long term.
If you’ve fallen off the change wagon and are feeling the self-improvement blues, it’s okay, I’ve been there too! Here are seven things to know to support you when it comes to making intentional change:
- You’re battling against your existing nervous system.
When you feel resistance to the changes you’re trying to make, realize it’s only the nervous system letting you know that, “Hey, I’m not programmed this way. We do things the old way, remember?” Please be patient with yourself and keep going. - Getting stuck in the process of change could mean you’re making progress.
The stuckness you might feel is an awareness that where you were is no longer satisfying, and you’re not yet where you want to be. Getting stuck and being willing to continue the work is a win in my book. - Change work takes time.
You’ve got to schedule and prioritize accordingly. Waking up earlier might be the best way to squeeze in the extra time. - Be consistent.
This is crucial for creating momentum in the direction you want to go. How can you start taking small, regular action toward what you want? - Change is a process.
It’s about incremental growth and incremental results. Feeling stuck, tired, or even overwhelmed are all progress — celebrate that! - Sometimes taking action means taking a break.
Sometimes the best thing we can do is focus on simply being rather than actively doing. This way, we can return to our self-development with even more vigor than before. - Find support for your growth journey.
Going it alone can be tough, especially during times when you’re feeling off-balance. Look for a coach or support system to help you along the way.
It’s important you feel good on your journey, that you operate from your own integrity. Sometimes that will lead to making changes. Other times, it will mean staying the same. Sometimes it will be a combination of the two. Ultimately, this is about trusting yourself, knowing that you have the answers inside.
Thanks for listening!
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