On Identity, Visibility, and Showing Up
My mom is here visiting me this week. We were sitting out back together enjoying a glass of wine, and she said to me, “I think you finally found it. I think you finally found your calling.”
She, of all people, knows how long I spent trying to figure out my path. And she’s right — I’ve found it!
Actually, I knew this was my calling since I was in my 30’s, but I wasn’t ready to go for because I hadn’t yet done the internal work. The last 5 years, however, have been the most fulfilling. And it’s all because I’ve been doing the work.
You see, my identity, who I am, hasn’t changed. It’s just that what I do and how I live my life has become more congruent with who I am and how I want to show up in the world. Notice I said “more congruent,” not perfectly congruent. I’m human too. And this path I’m on is a journey. There will always be more to learn.
When our experience doesn’t reflect what we want, our negativity bias can take over and skew our perception of reality and feed illusions we have about ourselves, making us feel deficient and wanting to hide.
But the truth is that you have everything you need to become who you really are — the you at your core — which is nothing but pure, positive beauty, love, prosperity, and abundance.
And yet, even though we have everything inside, sometimes we feel tentative about stepping out there and showing up.
Here’s a simple 4-step process to support you in embracing your identity, increasing your visibility, and showing up for your audience.
- Embrace visibility and show up for the world. As you do, you’ll gradually (or quickly) get out of your head and step into your true, congruent self.
- What do I have to learn?
- What limiting beliefs do I need to eliminate?
- What can I embrace instead?
- Do the work of dealing with questions like…
- Align your energy with the results you want. This process is about embodying the future you. How does your ideal self act in the world?
- Stick with the process. There’s no such thing as perfection here. The only perfect thing in the process is who you are at your core. You’re on a journey, forever evolving and growing into who you truly are.
Along the way, treat yourself the way you want to your clients or your students or your children to treat themselves — with kindness. Be a model for them. Do the work and be kind to yourself at the same time.
And no matter where you are on the visibility spectrum, whether you have a huge following or you’re “just” living your life in front of your family and close friends, people are already watching. And you’re making a difference. So show up with your purpose in hand, holding it in your heart.
Thanks for listening!
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