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b'(I Can\\u2019t Get No) Satisfaction\\nOur guarantee to you:\\nHere at Mikiatures.com we strive \\u2013 or struggle, rather \\u2013 to make your experience an enjoyable one; or, at the very least, a tolerable one. Each and every Mikiature is initially assessed according to five key criteria: readability, suitability, recordability, fillability and, last but not least, mickability. If successful (i.e. if it meets at least one of the aforementioned criteria), the Mikiature undergoes further exhaustive quality control checks (Tools . . . Count words . . . Save) before making it through to the final production phase (Record . . . Whatever . . . OK).\\nThat said, we want you to enjoy this Mikiature in perfect condition. Therefore, if you are not entirely satisfied with it in any way, simply return it to us, stating when and why you were reading and/or listening to it in the first place, and what in heaven\\u2019s name you were expecting for such a ridiculously low price. We shall have no choice but to send you a replacement Mikiature free of charge. If you\\u2019re not happy with that one, either, you know what you can do with it.\\nPlease note that this does not affect your statutory rights (whatever that means).'