The opening week of the season could have gone, well, a lot better. But misery loves company so Ian Stone, Art de Roch\xe9 and James McNicholas are here to provide that for you.\nThis week, which defender has the turning circle of a ship in a harbour? Who's just staring into nothingness? And why was Torreira at a theme park?\nRUNNING ORDER\nPART 1 - Oblivion (01.30)\n\nPART 2 - Brentford 2-0 Arsenal (05.00)\n\nPART 3 - Transfers (26.00)\n\nGet yourself an Athletic subscription with 30% off here\nLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices