Playing With Fire

Published: Feb. 23, 2013, noon

b"I am just stretching out and relaxing here on my big, black, comfortable, manly leather poppa chair in my living room, after a long drive home from my buddy Al's house. I didn't actually do the driving. My Lady Wonder Wench did the driving, because we were taking the trip in her car, and because she is convinced that she is a better driver than I am. Which she is not. She tailgates and I hate that...because the idiot ahead of you is not to be trusted. \\n\\tBut we take her car on long trips because it is much newer than mine, and in much better shape. It doesn't slow down when you turn on the windshield wipers, it doesn't leave streaks of oil on the side windows, and it doesn't make mysterious noises that only my Lady Wonder Wench can hear."