Jasmin Holley: Faith
Jasmin Holley: Faith
As everything tumbles about me
As everything falls apart
I sit and watch and wait
Not knowing, wondering
When will it stop
Where will it end
What is the lesson
Can’t I learn another way?
For the first time
I learned what stress is
My body racked with pain
My mind cluttered
Things seeming so unreal
Thinking I can take no more
Flooding, fires, people’s anger
theft, insects, deceptions
Not knowing where to step,
what to say, what to do.
What happens next?
Inside of me there is
a part, a place, that is calm
that says, “it’s not your fault”
You have no control
Just do what you can
Have Faith it will change
and all will be well
Time moves on
and with it peace
with it understanding
and an ending
Wait and have Faith
All is for the best
Each has its’ season.
Turmoil is but transformation
There is much to learn
Much to change
The other part of me
Angry, solitary, questioning,
“What the hell is going on?
Thinking it will never change
This craziness, this …..
My thoughts run wild
Creating more of the same
Again I hear
“It’s not your fault”
At two, at three, at four
The energy was the same
I was but a small child
The chaos, the anger, the deception
Placed upon my shoulder
Placed in my body, my mind
Take the responsibility
I did, I still do
But no more!
No more, for that
I do not control
Yes, this is the lesson, the learning.
Letting go of the teaching
of so long ago.
My father’s, my mother’s
My ancestor’s, it was theirs
Not mine, but I took it on
To keep them safe
They asked me to
They told me to
I knew no better
But now I do
I ask now
transform your fears
transform your terror
transform the teachings
They are not mine
They are not real
It is time to be
It is time to heal
I no longer need