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All my life I\'ve been good Do what my mom and dad and God say I should
\\nGo to church and Bible School
\\nTo live by God\'s rule
\\nSo whatever people tell me
\\nThat The Bible tells me
\\nI will do
\\nWalk the halls of high school with my purity ring
\\nUnlike those other girls, I\'ve got my morals in check
\\nIt was easy to do \'til I got a boyfriend
\\nAnd pardon my French, but he\'s cute as heck
\\nBut I made a pact to keep my hymen intact
\\nAnd Jesus and I are tight
\\nNever learned about the birds and bees
\\nI was taught to keep an aspirin in between my knees
\\n\'Cause The Bible says premarital sex is wrong
\\nBut Jason says that, "Guys can\'t wait that long"
\\nI don\'t want to lose him
\\nTo someone who\'ll do him
\\nI might need to figure something out
\\nWell there\'s a loophole in The Scripture that works really well
\\nSo I can get him off without going to hell
\\nIt\'s my Hail Mary, full of grace
\\nIn Jesus\' name, we go to fifth base!
\\nOh, thank you for making me holy
\\nAnd thank you for giving me holes to choose from
\\nAnd since I\'m not a Godless whore
\\nHe\'ll have to come in the back door
\\nTherefore
\\nFuck me in the ass \'cause I love Jesus
\\nThe good Lord would want it that way
\\nGimme that sweet sensation of a throbbing rationalization
\\nIt\'s just between you and me
\\n\'Cause everyone knows it\'s the sex that God can\'t see
\\nIt\'s hard to be as pure as me
\\nTo resist the urge to lose my vaginal virginity
\\nTo wait until my marriage bed
\\nTo give my husband my unsullied maidenhead
\\nSo take your cock out
\\nShove it in my ass
\\nFuck me until you cum
\\nOops! I mean let\'s join our souls and unite our bodies
\\nAnd fly with the wings of God
\\nWhatever you do, don\'t touch my clitoris
\\nIf you ring Satan\'s doorbell, God can\'t ignore this
\\nAnd no prophylactics when you put it in
\\n\'Cause birth control\'s for sluts and it\'s a sin
\\nI\'ve emptied my bowels
\\nAnd laid out the towels
\\nI\'m ready for romance
\\nNow I\'m praying to the Power that\'s the Highest
\\nBut of all of my holes, this one\'s the driest
\\nAnd we can\'t procreate if we anally copulate
\\nAnd God\'s OK with sodomy, but only if you\'re straight
\\nAnd I\'m staying pure, no matter what
\\nSo I\'m OK with everything but...
\\nEverything but...
\\nEverything but...
\\nWhoa, fuck me in the ass \'cause I love Jesus
\\nThe good Lord would want it that way
\\nGimme that sweet sensation of a rock hard rationalization
\\nIt\'s just between you and me
\\n\'Cause everyone knows it\'s the sex that God can\'t see
\\nI do whatever The Bible tells me to
\\nExcept for the parts that I choose to ignore
\\nBecause they\'re unrealistic and inconvenient
\\nBut the rest I live by for sure
\\nSo let\'s not talk about how the Good Book bans shellfish, polyester and divorce
\\nAnd how it condones slavery and killing gays
\\n\'Cause those parts don\'t count, of course
\\nLet\'s cherry-pick the part about losing my cherry and mine it for ambiguities and omissions
\\nTo circumvent any real sacrifice
\\nBut still feel pious in my arbitrary parroted positions
\\nAnd don\'t you dare question my convictions
\\nAnd don\'t look closely at the contradictions
\\nJust focus on the sacrificial crucifixion
\\nAnd have faith in its complete jurisdiction
\\nAs the only way to measure if you\'re good or not
\\nAnd in a debate, just say, "To have faith"
\\nBecause when you\'re up against logic, it\'s the only card you\'ve got
\\nSo close your eyes, take a deep breath and...
\\nFuck me in the ass \'cause I love Jesus
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