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Justin Lehmiller, author of Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How it can help you improve your sex life. He is a social psychologist and a research fellow at the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University.\nWhy research Fantasy?\nShould we normalize fantasy? So many people feel shame or like they are cheating.\nAre there hormones correlated with sexual fantasy?\nWhat are Americans Fantasizing about?\nShame about fantasy \u2013 and who feels more ashamed.\nOur our fantasies actually truth and should we act on them?\nThe difference between fantasy and desire.\nJust because you have a fantasy about a threesome \u2013 should you do it?\nHumans are poor predictors of future emotional states \u2013 Justin Lehmiller\nWhat do people mean when they talk about \u201cgetting the spark\u201d back. And is there a role for fantasy.\nSex quality versus quantity.\nIn his book Dr. Lehmiller talks about self disclosure and building trust\u2026.but it can seem fraught with backfire potential.\nShould you share your fantasy with you partner? How do you know if it is safe?\nNovelty \u2013 seems so simple but people have the same sex week in and out. Research shows couples who engage in the most acts of novelty tend to be the most sexually satisfied and the most successful at keeping the passion alive.\nThe most common fantasy and the one that doesn\u2019t work out well when done in real life \u2013 threesomes.\n\nTell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life https://amzn.to/3ZkDW5K\nSex and psychology podcast\nhttps://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sex-and-psychology-podcast/id1505460817\nDid you get the You Are Not Broken Book Yet? https://amzn.to/3p18DfK\nJoin my membership to get these episodes ASAP when they are created and without advertisement and even listen live to the interviews and episodes.\nwww.kellycaspersonmd.com/membership\n\n--- \n\nSend in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/kj-casperson/message\nLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices