Saying No When Other Parents are Saying Yes
How should we handle group situations where we have different parenting styles? When our particular rules around bedtimes, screens, curfews, or sugar are up against more lax rules (or none at all)?\n\xa0This topic was suggested by our listener Jessica:\n\xa0\n\xa0How do you deal with group situations where you parent differently without it causing friendship or family strain?\xa0Especially once your kids are old enough to ask why there are different expectations?\n\xa0\n\xa0Being in close proximity with people who parent differently can make us question how we do it. When other parents have other, looser rules, those of us who are more strict can feel judged. When other parents have firmer rules and tighter structures, those of us who don\u2019t also feel judged.\n\xa0Meanwhile, our kids are standing there watching us, wondering if we\u2019ll cave and let them stay up until 12:30 just this once or not.\n\xa0In this episode we discuss:\n\xa0\n\xa0matters of preference versus matters of philosophy- and how to tell the difference\n\xa0the importance of offline discussions\n\xa0the role that \u201cspaces and places\u201d play (things might be a little looser at Nana\u2019s house)\n\xa0when to default to the rules of the household you are in\n\xa0what happens when you have different rules from your co-parent\n\xa0why saying \u201cbecause I said so\u201d is a missed parenting opportunity\n\xa0\n\xa0Here\u2019s links to articles discussed in this episode:\n\xa0Lisa Belkin for The New York Times: Different Families, Different Rules\nWendy Bradford for On Parenting: When One Child\u2019s Rules Are Different Than The Other\u2019s\nPete Wells for the New York Times: Happy-Meal Me\nHere\u2019s our takeaway: It\u2019s okay to reconsider your own rules in these situations\u2026 just not in real time, and no matter what you do, not in front of your kid.\nLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices